Your intuition is screaming that something’s wrong, but you can’t find the evidence you need. If you watch his body language, read between her lines, you can see the tell-tale signs that your partner is cheating on you.
You sense it, now you’re looking for evidence to convince you you’re right.
You’re in pain, bleeding emotionally, but feel like you need to get answers. Problem is, the answers he gives to your direct questions are indirect, confusing, diversionary or defensive. That, alone, is a red flag he’s having an affair.
Just remember – What he doesn’t say, as well as what his unconscious body language reveals, is the really damming evidence you’re after. So what are some of the warning signs he’s cheating?
1. Defensiveness when questioned
2. Lack of surprise at accusation, pupil dilation, because the question has already been anticipated and the lie rehearsed.
3. Avoiding physical contact or, conversely, exaggerated and phony gestures of affection – or even obvious over-attentive behavior and gift-giving
4. Either avoiding eye contact or unnatural, sustained eye contact that makes you uncomfortable
5. Fidgeting, touching of mouth, nose, eyes, ears or neck
6. Contracting so as to take up less space
7. Changing the subject, answering a question with a question, taking offense (as a smoke-screen), turning the tables and making accusations at you
8. Closed fists, hidden palms
9. Flushing, red hands, dry mouth
10. Increased pulse and respiration
11. Closing eyes and avoiding discussions
12. Clenched jaw, tense lips
13. Discord in facial expression – eyes don’t match mouth
14. Overall body tension or exaggerated (false) relaxation
15. Deliberate, careful speech, as if he’s weighing every word – which he is.
16. Rushed speech
17. Change in normal tone and pitch of speech
18. Overly detailed or elaborate tales
19. Sudden diversionary coughing fits, throat clearing and other stall tactics
20. Talking on the phone with back turned or walking away into another room
21. Muffled, low phone conversations that suddenly sound normal and innocent the minute you walk in. Either that or he suddenly hangs up or ends the conversation as if everything is business as usual.
22. Long trips to the bathroom to talk on the phone, or long walks outside to use the cell
23. Sex without emotional involvement
24. Signs of anger, guilt or nervousness
So there you have it. Those nauseated, panicky feelings in your chest and stomach were right all along. Every movement she makes, every cell in his body is advertising that he’s cheating on you. What do you do now?
It hurts. It hurts like Hell, but once you’ve accepted the truth you bring the power back to your side of the court.
Now you can decide what to do, whether it’s to forgive and seek therapy or ditch him and move on. The important thing is that you can now proceed with your eyes fully open.
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