Bust A Cheating Partner

Secret Coat Hook Video Recorder Review

kajay — Sat, 28 Jan 2012 18:07:37 +0000

Introduction

There will come a time in someone’s life when they would have this nagging feeling that a loved one or an employee (a nanny or a maid perhaps) is doing something undesirable when he or she is not around.

Infidelity is on the rise and there are various reasons why a spouse would cheat on their partners – and often do the hanky-panky stuff right in their own homes and bedrooms!

CLICK HERE FOR SECRET COAT HOOK VIDEO RECORDER

To give you peace of mind (or closure to nagging suspicions), you can make use of covert cameras that you can hide or disguise in something very ordinary that it won’t attract suspicion from the people being monitored.

One such device that’s becoming a fast favourite is the Secret Coat Hook Video Recorder.

With video evidence in hand, you can confront the person – a cheating spouse or a thieving employee – and discuss more thoroughly the action that has just been recorded so you can take further action (such as the video of your spouse’s lover hanging his or her clothes on the hook of your video recorder!)

Product Description

The Secret Coat Hook Video Recorder looks like any other ordinary coat hook most homes have.

The only difference is that it is built-in with a hidden high quality camera that records videos of whatever is going on in your own home while you are away.

The camera is literally undetectable because of its pinhole size, and all the other recording stuff are secretly hidden away in the coat hook’s body and would never draw attention or suspicions from people being monitored.

That’s the beauty of such devices – it’s built to look and function like any other ordinary objects at home and the targets would never suspect that they’re being monitored.

Product Features

The Secret Coat Hook Video Recorder is built-in with a high quality video camera that captures footages in 1280 x 960 resolution and stores them in standard AVI format which you can easily view and process in your computer.

The rechargeable Li-ion battery can give you up to 120 minutes of recording time.

Battery life can be extended by setting the camera in Motion-Activated Recording mode so it will start recording only when movement or people is detected.

It has a built-in Micro SD memory card slot that can support 16 GB Micro SD cards and a USB Charger and cable which you can easily hook up to any PC for copying and transferring images to and from your camera.

Pros

The device is easy to setup and requires no complicated wirings that you can find in other high-end surveillance systems.

It gets the job done and records high quality images with a time/date stamp which you can later use for legal purposes.

Using screws or a professional-strength double-sided mounting tape, you can install the Secret Coat Hook Video Recorder in strategic locations that can capture the best view possible.

It’s a simple and effective way of monitoring what the nanny is doing to your child, the caregiver is doing to your elderly parent, or your cheating spouse is doing with his or her lover.

Cons

Because of the electronics built into the hidden camera, the Secret Coat Hook Video Recorder might break down if wet clothing and other articles are hang (which might occur if your cheating partner’s lover is in a rush).

It would be a lot better if the device was designed to be water proof or at least have the electronic parts water sealed.

Aside from that, the only problem with this device is that the 16 GB memory card is sold separately and not included in the basic package.

Final Thoughts

If you have these nagging suspicions about your employee or spouse as described earlier, why live in a state of constant doubt and torture yourself?

Get the Secret Coat Hook Video Recorder and have the peace of mind that someone like you deserves. You’ll discover the truth and finally put your stressful suspicions to rest.

CLICK HERE FOR SECRET COAT HOOK VIDEO RECORDER

Disclaimer: Spying may be an offense in your jurisdiction or country to monitor the activities of other individuals. So depending on where you are located, please consult your attorney before resorting to any spying.

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iPod Dock Hidden Camera Review

kajay — Sat, 28 Jan 2012 18:00:47 +0000

Introduction

Not many people would have thought that something as ordinary looking as an iPod dock can be used a surveillance camera that can boost the security in your home or business establishment.

No one would suspect that the iPod Dock Hidden Camera sitting at your desk or table has a hidden spy camera monitoring they’re every move – because it is a real and fully functioning iPod dock.

CLICK HERE FOR iPOD DOCK HIDDEN CAMERA

Product Description

The iPod Dock Hidden Camera is a great tool to have in your home or office if you need to monitor the area while you are away.

Just place it anywhere inconspicuous and it can record directly to a built-in SD card.

For longer recording sessions or if you want to send feeds via the Internet, you can place it somewhere near a computer where you can hook up to a USB port and you can have a fully functioning digital video recorder as well.

The dock can play music from any iPod devices such as the Classic, Touch, Mini or Nano and has all the charging capabilities and other functionalities one would expect from a full-pledged iPod Dock.

What people will not know however is the built-in covert camera as well as the 2.4 GHz wireless transmitter that can send digital feeds of the camera’s footage to your location of up to 500 feet away.

Product Features

The iPod Dock Hidden Camera is equipped with 1/4” micron sensor capable of recording footages in NTSC video system format at 320×240 pixels resolution.

It maintains a Sensitivity of >11.5V/lux-s @ 550nm and has Auto-Tracking White Balance.

Using a 2.4 GHz as its standard digital signal, it can send video footages wirelessly through its built-in dipole antenna and is capable enough of filtering out outside interference signals that can affect the video feed.

Pros

What users like about the iPod Dock Hidden Camera aside from its dual functionality of a fully functional iPod dock and a hidden spy camera is its wireless capabilities that allow you to monitor what’s going on in your home or room even from 500 feet away.

Thanks to its built-in Windows-compatible software, you can use the built-in SD card to store images, or have it hooked up to your computer for streaming video sent to you directly through the Internet.

Are you suspecting that your spouse is having an affair and is bringing his or her lover right into your own home?

Then the iPod Dock Hidden Camera can be a great tool to have to monitor and record everything that takes place – without them knowing all about it.

Cons

If you’re planning to use multiple camera setups, then you will be disappointed to know that the iPod Dock Hidden Camera has a USB receiver that can only process one digital signal at a time.

You would need multiple camera units, each one having its own separate USB receiver, if you want to have a multi-camera setup.

Another thing to consider though is that you may not use a 3^rd or earlier generation of iPods with your 4^th Generation iPod Dock Hidden Camera – so be aware of the types of devices you have.

Final Thoughts

iPods and iPod docks are such ordinary things that many people now have in their homes and offices, so it would just be practical to use this image as your disguise for concealing a spy camera.

Without these discreet qualities, an iPod Dock Hidden Camera will not be effective.

CLICK HERE FOR iPOD DOCK HIDDEN CAMERA

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DVD Player Hidden Camera Review

kajay — Sat, 28 Jan 2012 17:55:53 +0000

Introduction

Hidden spy cameras come in all shapes and sizes, some in amusing packages while others are ingenious and practical in integration with ordinary objects.

This is attributed to the fact that concealing a camera inside everyday household objects and appliances such as DVD players makes them even more effective in capturing critical events or even crime inside your home or office without perpetrators knowing about them.

CLICK HERE FOR DVD PLAYER HIDDEN CAMERA

What’s also great about these surveillance devices such as the DVD Player Hidden Camera is that they maintain their dual functionality, in this case functioning well as a DVD player and a video recorder.

You can effectively monitor and capture videos and images of what’s going on in your home while you’re away for whatever purpose it may serve you: monitoring nanny activities, burglaries, or even a cheating spouse.

Product Description

The DVD Player Hidden Camera from BrickHouse is a fully functional DVD player that is built in with a hidden video camera and equipped with a 2.4 GHz wireless transmitter that allows you to view direct feeds from more than 500 meters away.

The device is complete with all the trimmings and accessories standard DVD players would have such as HDMI cables, remote consoles, and other connectors.

The unit can also be set up directly to your computer’s USB port, turning your laptop or PC into a fully functional digital video recorder.

Product Features

The BrickHouse DVD Player Hidden Camera comes with appropriate software that allows users to stream feeds over the Internet, record to a local computer’s hard drive, and remote access from another computer.

Using a 2.4 GHz as its standard digital signal, you can be assured that you can monitor and record critical moments without fear of interference from wayward signals.

Using the standard NTSC video system format, the DVD Player Hidden Camera has 1/4” micron sensor capable of recording footages at 320×240 pixels resolution.

It maintains a Sensitivity of >11.5V/lux-s @ 550nm, has Auto-Tracking White Balance, and a powerful Dipole antenna that assures you get clear feeds even from 500 feet away.

The device is very compact at 3.3″ x 1.2″ x .39″ and weighs only 0.56 oz – ideal for installation in any room or space in your home or office.

Pros

The DVD Player Hidden Camera has its own special software that allows you remote access to feeds of the camera’s footage even if you’re logged in to another PC or laptop.

It is very easy to setup and the instruction manual that comes with the package is easy to understand and guides you to the proper setup process.

The DVD Player Hidden Camera has received many positive reviews from users not only because of its effectiveness as a hidden spy camera, but also because of its relatively inexpensive cost as well.

Cons

The only problem users can get from the DVD Player Hidden Camera is that the USB receiver that comes with the package can only process one signal from one digital source at any given time.

If you will need to set-up multiple cameras, you will need a separate receiver for each one to make the setup possible.

Final Thoughts

Despite the limitations for multiple camera setups, the DVD Player Hidden Camera is still considered one of the top DVD hidden camera units available in the market because of its low price and superb functionality both as a spy camera and a DVD player.

It’s a great security measure that you can add to your home or business.

CLICK HERE FOR DVD PLAYER HIDDEN CAMERA

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Diversion Safes Review

kajay — Sat, 28 Jan 2012 17:46:27 +0000

Introduction

Most people have valuable stashed somewhere in their homes.

Many have the tendency to hide their valuables in locked drawers inside their dressers or hiding cash and jewelries under the mattress or on the top shelf of a cabinet.

CLICK HERE FOR DIVERSION SAFES

The problem however is that thieves and burglars know exactly where people try to hide their valuables and these places would be the first areas they would ransack.

Well, most people can’t afford the heavy and more secured locking safe, much less having them installed inside a wall hiding behind a painting or a cabinet.

Instead of hiding your valuables inside areas where burglars would most likely look, the best alternative would be to hide them somewhere would no one would think to look.

And a much better way would be to hide them within secret compartments inside ordinary objects, or what can be called Diversion Safes.

From the term “diversion” itself, the concept behind Diversion Safes is quiet simple – hide your valuables in plain sight that burglars would overlook.

According to experts, a typical burglar would spend an average of eight minutes inside a home and would go for the most valuable items they could find and in a hurry.

They would immediately go to areas where valuables are most likely kept and would have no time inspecting everyday-looking objects right under their noses – without realizing that these same objects hold the valuable items they’ve been looking for.

Product Description

BrickHouse Security has a wide variety of Diversion Safes that people can choose from.

They have developed Diversion Safes in various safes and sizes and built them disguised as ordinary household objects such as an aluminum spray bottle, a hair brush, soda cans, candles, hair spray and a lint roller.

What makes these items even more inconspicuous from the keen eyes of even the most receptive burglar is these items are fully functioning – no one would suspect that they’re actually serving another purpose.

Product Features

BrickHouse Security Diversion Safes come in various shapes, forms and sizes and are designed to mimic and function just like the real thing.

These Diversion Safes vary in storage capacities such as 18 cubic inches for a hair brush, 38 cubic inches for a lint roller, and 62 cubic inches for a spray bottle.

These items are properly weighed just like the real thing to hide the fact that a major section is actually hollow and contains something aside from what it should hold.

It all depends on what the user prefers and the amount of storage space that he or she will need.

Pros

BrickHouse Security Diversion Safes in all practicality look, feel and function just like the real thing and this is their most effective thief-deterring characteristic.

You can set these items up in plain site and burglars would never know what they missed.

Cons

As mentioned earlier, professional thieves and burglars are getting more and more intelligent as security measures gets more and more complicated.

Some would improve their craft and study new security and deterrent systems, and in most likelihood would know something about Diversion Safes – so there is a possibility that they can see through the charade and discover your valuables.

The only assurance that you can get is the fact that burglars are pressed for time and may not have the tenacity to go through each household item and check whether they’re the real thing – or hiding something else underneath.

Final Thoughts

No matter how secure a locked cabinet or a safe inside a home can be, burglars seem to find ways to get to them and steal your valuables.

The best deterrent against such people is to hide your valuables somewhere they would least expect or have the time and tenacity to inspect, and Diversion Safes disguised as something else would be the cheapest but one of the most effective to have.

CLICK HERE FOR DIVERSION SAFES

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LiveLine BHS Ultra Review

kajay — Sat, 28 Jan 2012 17:37:19 +0000

Introduction

Some time back, people were made aware of how video surveillance cameras installed in a home can add higher levels of security and give homeowners the peace of mind that they deserve.

CLICK HERE FOR LIVELINE BHS ULTRA

The news story revolved around a 4^th floor apartment owned by Levent Cetiner located within the Gramercy Park neighbourhood in New York City.

Cetiner installed an Internet Protocal (IP) surveillance camera in his home and was surprised when one day he received an email alert from the device with a photo of an intruder ransacking his home.

Cetiner immediately alerted the police who rushed to his home just in time to catch the intruder, José Perez-Quinonez, after making an unsuccessful attempt to escape, leaving his loot behind in his haste.

Such devices like the LiveLine BHS Ultra are affordable but effective security systems that are available in the market and can be easily installed in your home for added security.

The functions however goes beyond security, as the device can also monitor nannies, caregivers, and even cheating spouses – when they least expect it and when you’re away from home.

Product Description

The LiveLine BHS Ultra is wireless IP camera that can serve as your third eye when you’re away from home for whatever surveillance or security purposes it may serve you.

It can easily be installed in a matter of minutes without the need for complicated setups and wirings unlike other security camera systems.

It has night vision so you can view what’s going on even when there is little or no light.

It stores video captures in a unique cloud storage system which you can access anywhere using a computer with Internet access – allowing you to monitor your home even if you’re half a world away.

Product Features

The LiveLine BHS Ultra is very easy to install and all you need is a power source and means to connect to a network router to allow the camera to connect to the Internet.

You can connect the camera directly to the router using cables or you can setup the wireless features and place the camera anywhere within reach of your WiFi Network.

You will also need a LiveLine account which you can use to login through their website. Once you’re in, you can view the live feed coming from your camera using any computer.

You can also use any Java-enabled mobile devices such as the iPhone or the iPad and access your feeds through special apps.

You can even perform simple controls like pan, tilt and zoom using the touchscreen of your mobile device or use the 8-preset camera positions that can give you the clearest view of the area you are monitoring.

Pros

Internet and cloud computing accessibility makes the LiveLine BHS Ultra a modern, effective but low-cost security system that you can have in your home or business establishments.

Since footages are stored in the cloud, you need not worry about running out of memory space. Other features that people enjoy are the motion-activated recording so the device will record movement or action only when detected.

Like what Levent Cetiner experienced in his system, the email alerts can prompt you to take action immediately and catch the perpetrators in action. All these without the high price tags typical of high end security systems.

Cons

You need to avail of any of the subscription plans to pay for the hosted video surveillance features that the LiveLine BHS Ultra can offer.

Final Thoughts

The LiveLine BHS Ultra is a hosted video surveillance system and this means you have to avail of a monthly subscription plan to enjoy all the benefits that the system can offer.

Some may not like the idea of having to pay this amount regularly, but considering the peace of mind that it will give you and the big difference in price compared to more expensive systems – it may be well worth it.

CLICK HERE FOR LIVELINE BHS ULTRA

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iShot 2.0 Review

kajay — Fri, 27 Jan 2012 21:14:33 +0000

Introduction

Home security is a 60 billion dollar per year business.

Aside from locking down your windows and doors at all times, investing in additional security measures like wireless house alarms and surveillance cameras are something wise homeowners are doing to protect their homes and loved ones.

CLICK HERE FOR iSHOT 2.0

The great thing about this is that such gadgets are now more widely available and much more affordable.

Hidden or disguised surveillance cameras are some of the more popular security gadgets available in the market. These devices have gone a long way from being figment of some spy-thriller writer’s vivid imagination.

Now, people can buy gadgets like the iShot 2.0 Alarm Clock Spy Camera and use it anywhere at home or while travelling as a reliable third-eye that can give you a glimpse of what’s going on when you are not around.

Home security against burglars is not the only function you can get from the iShot 2.0 Alarm Clock Spy Camera.

You can monitor the activities of your babysitters, the chamber maids in your hotel room, or even a spouse you’re suspecting of having an affair – and you can capture and document it all for later use.

Product Description

The iShot 2.0 Alarm Clock Spy Camera is a surveillance video system that you can use at home, in the office, or in your business establishments to keep an eye out for you without anyone noticing.

Recording is motion activated, allowing you to record and monitor where the action is.

The quality is high and footages are stored in an SD card which you can easily plug in to any computer for downloading.

Aside from that, the iShot 2.0 Alarm Clock Spy Camera is highly portable and you can bring it along with you for added security in your hotel room.

Product Features

The iShot 2.0 Alarm Clock Spy Camera requires minimal setup, allowing you to immediately record high quality 720 x 480 video for up to ten hours when batteries are fully charged.

The camera is motion activated so it will start recording only when an action or event is detected, saving you battery life and storage space but allowing you to record only when it matters.

The video or photo functions can also be activated by remote control, recording videos in AVI format with a frame rate of 29 FPS.

The iShot 2.0 Alarm Clock Spy Camera comes with a built-in Micro SD slot that can accommodate up to 32 GB of flash memory. In photo mode, images are captured in 2048 x 1536 high resolutions.

The iShot 2.0 Alarm Clock Spy Camera weighs only 90 grams and measures a compact 4.3 x 2.3 x 1.3 inches, allowing you to easily place the device in strategic locations in a room or area.

Pros

The iShot 2.0 Alarm Clock Spy Camera has a superbly long battery life that can give you up to 30 days of standby time when used in areas with minimal activities.

It is so easy to use and requires no complicated setup: just charge it and away you go. The portability of the device makes it a perfect companion when you want to monitor your room or belongings while travelling on business or pleasure.

Oh… it’s a fully functioning alarm clock as well.

Cons

Everything about the iShot 2.0 Alarm Clock Spy Camera is perfect except for the fact that it does not come with a bundled Micro SD card – you have to buy it separately.

Final Thoughts

People get peace of mind knowing that their homes and belongings are secure and well monitored. Although the iShot 2.0 Alarm Clock Spy Camera is not a deterrent against intruders, burglars or wayward nannies or housekeepers, the video images that you can get can be used to catch these crooks (even a cheating spouse!) later on.

CLICK HERE FOR iSHOT 2.0

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BrickHouse Car Key Video Recorder Review

kajay — Fri, 27 Jan 2012 21:11:26 +0000

Introduction

Despite the fact that digital cameras and camcorders are very affordable in the market, people do not always carry one along with them anywhere they go – although many would want to capture every special moment they encounter every day.

CLICK HERE FOR BRICKHOUSE CAR KEY VIDEO RECORDER

But let’s say that you’re the kind of guy who has no qualms in lugging around a camera strapped to his neck, you still cannot capture every moment – particularly instances that require higher levels of discretion.

Tiny spy cams such as the BrickHouse Car Key Video Recorder can be the solution people need when faced in certain situations similar to these.

A car key in someone’s hand will not raise any suspicions or alarms if you want to be discreet while taking pictures or video – and you can bring this device anywhere with you just like the heroes and heroines in spy movies everyone loves.

Product Description

The BrickHouse Car Key Video Recorder looks like a standard keychain but is actually a covert video surveillance equipment that can give you reliable surveillance functionalities that you can bring along with you to any situation, easily and readily.

With its built in DVR system, users can capture video footages, high-resolution pictures, and even record audio materials. There are no complicated setup requirements for you to do in order to use the camera right away and at full charge, you can have enough battery juice to last you up to ninety minutes of recording time.

Product Features

The BrickHouse Car Key Video Recorder captures surveillance footages and records them all in standard AVI format at 720 x 480 video resolution, capturing 30 frames per second.

The Micro SD card can process up to 32 GB of flash memory, which is equivalent to more than 16 hours of video while your battery lasts.

Equipped with a mini USB 2.0 interface, you can easily hook up the BrickHouse Car Key Video Recorder to any computer and immediately view the surveillance footages you captured.

You can also capture high 1280×960 JPG 1,300,000 pixel images with the BrickHouse Car Key Video Recorder. It also allows you to embed a time and date stamp on your surveillance videos and images.

The design is so compact and tiny that you can bring it along with you at all times, enabling you to capture pictures and videos when it matters.

Pros

The use of the key chain as the base design for the BrickHouse Car Key Video Recorder is a clever idea if you want discretion and secrecy when you want to perform covert actions.

With a touch of a button, you can easily capture videos or images without people even knowing that what you have in your hands is a spy camera.

The long standby and recording time makes it an ideal monitoring tool if portability is what you need.

Cons

The BrickHouse Car Key Video Recorder makes use of the Micro SD format that allows you to plug in up to 32 GB of flash memory, or equivalent to more than 16 hours of recording time.

The only problem is – you have to buy the memory card separately as it is not included in the basic set.

Final Thoughts

There are many uses of the BrickHouse Car Key Video Recorder and in some of this cases it enables you to capture very important events such as capturing images and videos from a car accident, a burglary or an intruder attack, a spouse caught with his or her lover, and other similar instances that allows only a very small window of opportunity to take snapshots.

CLICK HERE FOR BRICKHOUSE CAR KEY VIDEO RECORDER

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4 Camera USB DVR Kit Review

kajay — Sun, 15 Jan 2012 16:00:54 +0000

Introduction

Unless you are working from home and spend all the time in your home office or business, you can’t possibly know what’s going on in your own home while you’re away or at work.

CLICK HERE FOR 4 CAMERA USB DVR KIT

Surveillance cameras can add some level of security to your home but really good and efficient surveillance systems can cost a great deal of money – some sophisticated enough that only big corporations can afford them.

It’s a good thing that there are now affordable DIY home surveillance systems available in the market now such as the 4 Camera USB DVR Kit.

You won’t need a professional to help you install one of these in your home, but it can provide you with a reliable surveillance solution that records every action in your home while you are away – and be a critical tool in helping catch intruders preying on your home or your cheating partner’s sneaky lover trying to slip one from right under your nose.

Product Description

The 4 Camera USB DVR Kit is a digital surveillance solution that gives you four different viewing areas that you can set up in your home or small business facility.

The system has an integrated USB receiver that you can directly hook up to any personal computer, allowing you to capture activities in your home or business and stores these footages in your computer for later viewing.

You can also monitor the action directly and remotely from another location and PC, through live video streams sent through the Internet.

Product Features

This USB DVR Kit makes use of four digital cameras broadcasting a 2.4 GHz signal within a 400 feet LOS radius. The cameras and DVR kit can be used for both indoors and outdoors applications and using its bundled software can help you record and store video footage on your computer or stream it through the Internet.

The system also features a 30-feet Motion Detector that activates the cameras when motion or activity is detected within the monitored area.

The cameras are also equipped with IR Nightvision capabilities, allowing you to monitor and record scenes within a 50-foot range even at night.

Users have the option to view the camera feeds simultaneously using the Quad-view or you can use a single channel view to monitor indoor, outdoor or combined indoor-outdoor activities depending on where you installed the cameras. The cameras are equipped with 3.6 mm lenses, run on DC12V power, and produces video images at 640×480 resolution.

Pros

The 4 Camera USB DVR Kit records surveillance footages in full color when lighted or infrared images when the cameras operate during minimal light conditions or at night, making the kit a perfect solution for your surveillance needs.

One of the efficient and effective features that users can get big benefits from is the remote capability for the cameras.

You can be notified for every detected intruder movements through email or you can access and view the livestream from another computer. This gives the assurance that you can monitor what goes on at your home even while you’re away.

Another cool thing that users like about this product is the ease of setup which does not require professional installers, allowing you to set up the system on your own in a matter of minutes. The cameras are water resistant making them ideal surveillance tools for both indoor and outdoor applications.

Cons

Although 4 cameras with a wide 400 feet range can give you much coverage, you can only monitor areas within the camera’s line of sight. There may be some blind spots in your installation that intruders can exploit or work their way around to.

Final Thoughts

There are several real-world internet stories circulating online of how surveillance cameras help homeowners catch intruders to their homes.

These surveillance systems like the 4 Camera USB DVR kit also played a pivotal role in helping spouses catch their cheating partners in action and it’s all up to them to use these footages as solid proof which they can use when pursuing legal action.

CLICK HERE FOR 4 CAMERA USB DVR KIT

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2MB PS2 KEY LOGGER Review

kajay — Sun, 15 Jan 2012 15:44:09 +0000

Introduction

It is a normal feeling for a parent to want to know what their children is up to or for a spouse to be aware of what his or her partner are doing when they are online.

CLICK HERE FOR 2MB PS2 KEY LOGGER

As a parent, you would of course want to know if your underaged child is engaging in some online activity that involves giving away personal information to someone you don’t know.

As a spouse, your partner can be vulnerable to the allures of virtual infidelity – and this starts with them engaging in some online activities they don’t want you to know.

If you can relate to the scenarios described above, then using a 2MB PS2 Key Logger can help you sleep better at night, knowing that you can now have a way of looking into what your children or spouse is doing online.

The tool is very simple to use and allows you to record the keystrokes your child or spouse made on your computer, taking note of certain keywords that can help protect your family from Internet predators and other online hazards – before it’s too late.

Product Description

The 2MB PS2 Key Logger is a powerful tool that you can attach to your computer just like any other standard computer, but has the ability to interpret the information that sheds a light on the computer unit’s usage activities based on the actual keystrokes typed.

The tool records this information inside its built-in flash memory, allowing you to retrieve the data for later review. The device is plug and play, allowing you to install and use immediately without any additional installations, and allows months of keystroke information to be recorded under normal computer use.

Product Features

The device uses the PS2 standard which is compatible with most US and International keyboards. Under typical computer usage at home, the 2MB internal memory can give you up to 6 months of keystroke recordings and includes time and date stamping for every recording – a critical component that you will need should you require this information later for legal use (as in the case of a cheating spouse).

It can be used with standard operating systems, uses zero or minimal system resources, and requires no additional drivers or software to use.

Pros

The device provides a quick and easy method for you to discreetly monitor your child or spouse’s online activities such as the websites they’re visiting, their chat and email entries, and other computer or Internet-related activities.

This can be very helpful if you need to retrieve certain passwords to documents, computer usage, and other online activities that they are trying hard to conceal from you.

Parents and spouses are not the only ones who can benefit from the features of this device as business owners can also make use of the tool as a means of monitoring employee, detecting anomalous activities online, and unauthorized use of your business or company’s computer system and equipments.

Cons

The device however is still using the PS2 standard which will pose a problem for newer computer models which will make use of more modern connection standards such as USB or HDMI.

There are however adapters that you can use, but a child or a spouse who has some working knowledge of computer parts and systems will find these things rather unusual and will suspect something is up.

Another problem with this tool is that it is designed for desktop computers that make use of separate keyboards – which makes it quite useless if your child or spouse use laptops or notebooks instead.

Final Thoughts

Protecting your child from online hazards or detecting infidelity through your spouse’s online activities are some of the real-world concerns a parent or spouse have to deal with in this Internet-driven world.

To do all these things, one would need simple but effective tools for monitoring online activities and the 2MB PS2 Key Logger should be at the top of your list.

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Why Did My Spouse Change Password on the Computer?

kajay — Fri, 30 Dec 2011 17:29:47 +0000

Although the Internet has been very helpful in making communication and accessing information a lot easier, it also made it very easy for men and women to commit infidelity against their spouses.

Studies show that up to 44% of married men and 27% of married women using the Internet cheated on their spouses through online means – virtual or otherwise.

Short of invading one’s privacy, it is very difficult to catch someone cheating on their spouses through the Internet.

There are signs however, that people can look for that is indicative of a cheating behaviour.

One of the most common is when a spouse changes his or her passwords on the computer and the websites they visit to.

However, before anyone can make a rash decision and start accusing their spouse of cheating, he or she should be sure that their spouses are indeed cheating on them.

It should also be clearly understood that cheating is not the only reason why a spouse would change password on the computer as the following would clearly identify.

* Your Spouse is Cheating on You

Changing the password on the computer and refusing to grant you access is a clear indication that he or she is hiding something from you and that something could be infidelity.

However, it should be understood that the act of changing passwords alone is not an indication that your spouse is cheating already.

There are other signs to look for that when pieced together will give the impression that your spouse is cheating on you.

Some of these things include: prolonged use of the Internet day in and day out; positioning the monitor away from your sight or scrambling to hide the screen when you suddenly walked into the room; they become hostile and irritable when confronted with the password change; and cleaning out the history records of their usage every time.

* Your Spouse is Engaged in Something Illegal

Putting passwords on computer is a normal corporate requirement but not so in the family setting.

A company protects its secrets even from their employees, but in a family hiding secrets from one another is utterly strange – unless he or she is engaged in something illegal that they don’t want you to know.

Well, the term “illegal” may be too harsh, but your spouse may be engaged in an Internet business, and earning from it, but doesn’t want you to know for one reason or another.

* Your Spouse is Working on a Big Surprise for You

You spouse may not be committing infidelity or engaging in something illegal but he or she may be working on something that would come as a big surprise for you.

Your birthday or anniversary may be drawing and he or she is hatching some scheme they don’t want you to know.

Similar to what was mentioned earlier, he or she may be earning extra money through online means and would like to surprise you with his or her successes.

* You Are Just Overreacting and Have Some Trust Issues

A spouse changing the password on your computer without ever telling you the new codes can be an indication that he or she is cheating on you – or it can be an indication that you are just overreacting and clearly have some trust issues.

Spouses have higher levels of commitment with one another and trust should be an intrinsic part of that commitment.

In the absence of other clues that would indicate that your spouse is cheating on you, your suspicions and lack of trust may not have some real basis at all and jumping into conclusion without sound basis can only damage your relationship.

CLICK HERE TO CATCH A CHEATING SPOUSE

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How To Deal With A Cheating Girlfriend

kajay — Fri, 30 Dec 2011 15:21:19 +0000

Infidelity is a serious problem plaguing many relationships not only in this country but around the world as well.

Cheating has ruined not only marriages but good relationships between committed partners.

However, infidelity has evolved from the traditional husband or boyfriend cheating on their partners. It is not an uncommon instance in this modern world to find wives cheating on their husbands or girlfriends cheating on their partners.

Although cheating girlfriends are not as common as boys cheating on their partners, several girls do cheat on their boyfriends.

Although it would take much for a girl to cheat on her boyfriend, most of the time, their boyfriends have no idea about what’s going on until it is too late.

If you’re one of the unlucky guys who just found out that their girlfriends were cheating on them, it would be to your utmost benefit to understand the different options that are available to you in this regard.

Work on Yourself First

But before you dive into the options on how to deal with a cheating girlfriend, the first step that you should take is to work on yourself first.

It is but natural to feel anger, rage, and resentment against your girlfriend but despite all these, you should not let your emotions take total control over you.

Before making any actions, it would be best to cool things off first and calm your emotions down.

This way you can have full control of your mental faculties and make decisions that would be for your best interest.

Once you’ve calmed down and have full control of your emotions once more, you can start and take careful consideration of the following options that you can choose from in dealing with your cheating girlfriend.

Your Options in Dealing with a Cheating Girlfriend

*Ignore the Issue

Boys would be boys and the easiest way to deal with the issue would be to ignore it. It would be easy for many to do this so they won’t have to deal with the emotional brouhaha that they would surely face should they decide to confront their girlfriends about this.

The problem with this approach is that all your resentment and bitterness from being betrayed can fester and eventually ruin whatever relationship you have left.

*Take Time Off From One Another

Another way that many boys resort to in order to avoid or delay confrontation is to ask their girlfriend for some space and be left alone for a while, probably a week or more without seeing each other.

Many find this as a chance to think things through, calm the anger and resentment that are swelling deep inside, so they can have full control of their mental faculties when the time comes to discuss the matter with their girlfriends.

* It’s Time to Let Her Go

One of the most common and normal reactions from a guy who has just been cheated upon by his girlfriend is to lash out at his girl and tell her that it is all over – without really thinking about the implications of what he had just said.

Many find this a rash decision later on and would most likely have second thoughts about what he had just done and would try to bring her back. The relationship at this point however will not be the same and would take serious effort from both parties if they want to bring things back the way they did before.

* Work Things Out between the Two of You

If the guy loves his girlfriend that much, he would try and work out kinks in their relationships and iron out all the issues that led to his girlfriend cheating on him.

As mentioned before, it takes much for a girl to cheat on his guy and most often than none the boyfriend himself has much to do with the reasons behind the infidelity.

The first step is to understand the reason why she cheated on you and to get her reassurance that she would also like to reconcile and bring things back the way they were – and this means a serious commitment from both ends of the relationship.

CLICK HERE TO CATCH A CHEATING GIRLFRIEND

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Why Did My Spouse Change Password On the iPhone?

kajay — Fri, 30 Dec 2011 14:28:36 +0000

Almost everything in this modern world has evolved in parallel with technological advancements people have enjoyed over the years.

Such advancements made work, study, and play much more convenient, mobile and rapid that they permeated themselves into almost every aspect of people’s lives today.

In the context of infidelity, gone were the days when the only means of communication between a cheating spouse and his or her lover were encrypted messages that can easily be intercepted or paid couriers who can easily be bribed.

Right now, cheating spouses make use of every known electronic or digital tool to get in touch with their lovers with minimal risk of being detected.

One such tool is the iPhone, an innovative communication tool that brings almost all known forms of electronic communications literally under your fingertips.

One such feature of the iPhone is its password capability, locking the phone and its content from prying eyes unless you have the correct password.

In a healthy and happy marital relationship, spouses don’t lock down their phones from each other or if they do, would reveal the password to his or her mate.

But what if your spouse changed the password to his or her iPhone, and fails to tell you what the new password is?

Should this incident ring loud bells telling you that something is seriously wrong – something that smells of infidelity?

At this point, it would not be wise to jump into conclusions without first knowing the real score behind your spouses’ actions.

One possible reason is that your spouse changed the password for security reasons, fearing that someone is trying to hack their way into his or her phone, and his or her failure to tell the changes made was a simple oversight that he or she did not intend.

If this is the case, he or she would have no second thoughts of telling you the new password – otherwise his or her refusal to do so would be something for you to ponder on and investigate further.

Another possible reason for the password is to protect the phone from being erroneously dialled while placed inside his or her bag and getting into contact with other stuff that could activate the touch screen.

A reason as innocent as this should not be cause for concern if he or she would tell you the password later. On the other hand, his or her failure or refusal to do so should warrant further investigation on your part.

You should look for other signs from his or her behaviour aside from the fact that he or she is locking down the iPhone to know for certain that he or she might be having an affair.

Hiding her iPhone while sleeping or keeping it close to her at all times can be suspicious, and so does his or her unusual behaviour of going to another room or outside when he or she is talking with someone else on the phone.

A quick check on his or her phone bill for unusual numbers called is another way of investigating the fact.

Changing the password on his or her iPhone does not mean your spouse is cheating on you and hiding the fact.

Do not go to the extreme and make use of all sorts of illegal electronic shenanigans so you can access your spouse’s iPhone and dig through its contents. Sometimes an honest to goodness one-on-one discussion is all you need.

CLICK HERE TO CATCH A CHEATING SPOUSE

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How To Deal With A Cheating Boyfriend

kajay — Fri, 30 Dec 2011 14:26:23 +0000

Infidelity is a harsh reality that has laid waste to too many relationships since time immemorial and the possibility that it can happen to you and your boyfriend is something that you should ponder and be prepared for.

When it comes, it would surely cause a lot of hurt and depression on your part but knowing what to do in terms of dealing with a cheating boyfriend can get you back on your feet in no time – instead of sulking in misery and self-pity.

Of course, the words above can be simpler said than done, particularly if you have invested a great deal of your time, efforts, energy and emotions into your relationship.

Once the reality of his cheating hits you, it may take awhile before you can absorb it all and recover well enough to decide what to do next. Knowing and understanding the steps you need to take can put you in a better position than being left in the dark.

Is He Really Cheating on You?

But before anything else, you must first establish for certain that your boyfriend is indeed cheating on you.

Women are emotional beings and may jump into conclusions and make rash actions blindly based on what another person tells her without first confirming the truth.

Before you even plan of confronting him for his alleged infidelity, make sure that you have ample proof that he is indeed cheating – or regret your decision all your life.

Know how to distinguish moments of boyhood playfulness from actual cheating. Boys are natural suckers for good looking girls but flirting does not necessarily mean he is already cheating on you – unless he made the promise to refrain from doing so.

He may be attracted to another girl only for a brief and fleeting moment and the girl that he still wants to be with is you.

Seek Advice from People Who Can Help You

Infidelity is a very complex situation that can be brought about by several reasons: from succumbing to madness and temptation for just one single night, to a serious flaw in your relationship that he wants filled.

You may not know what to do next after confirming that it is so, and you may end up having sleepless nights and bouts of depression – unless you seek help and advice from people who can help you deal with your problem.

Help can come from someone professional and well-equipped to help you deal with your problem, or it can be someone special in your life who you look up to who have the wisdom and probably the experience to guide you pass what you are going through.

The key thing here is not to make rash decisions that you will regret that would cause much more pain on your part.

Confront Him

If you are ready with your proof and have the emotional stamina to face the problem right in the face, then it would the right time for you to confront your cheating boyfriend.

Have a heart-to-heart talk with him without letting your emotions take control of your discussions.

Know what is on his mind and be firm in giving him an ultimatum. If he agrees with what you laid out for him, then it would be the proper time to lay out a plan in your relationship that both of you will agree upon.

Are You Ready for What Might Happen Afterwards

If you decide to give him an ultimatum, then you should be ready to what might happen afterwards.

He could accept what you offer him and will promise to make amends and build your relationship back to what it once before or even better.

If he fails to live up to what you agreed in his ultimatum, then it is time for you to let him go. If during the confrontation stage he decides that it’s over for him and you – then be ready with this possibility.

Of course it would hurt a lot but you must be ready to accept reality.

CLICK HERE TO CATCH A CHEATING SPOUSE

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Why Did My Spouse Stop Wearing the Wedding Ring?

kajay — Thu, 29 Dec 2011 17:15:45 +0000

If you and your spouse have been in a healthy relationship for years are fond of seeing each other consistently wearing your wedding ring everywhere you go, then seeing your spouse’s hand with a missing ring can come as a shock.

Now at this point, it would be foolish to jump into any conclusion without first knowing the facts and reasons behind why your spouse stopped wearing the wedding ring.

The reasons behind the missing wedding ring can be as simple as an innocent oversight on the part of your spouse, or it can be as serious as an indication that something is wrong in your relationship or that your spouse is cheating on you.

But whatever the reasons why your spouse stopped wearing the wedding ring might be, it would be wise to know the real facts first before you throw any accusations around.

The Potential Reasons

It Simply Doesn’t Fit Anymore

One of the most common reasons why a spouse would not wear the wedding ring anymore is due to the simple fact that it doesn’t fit well anymore or may have grown uncomfortable to wear.

The ring could constrict his or her finger because of weight gain or because of the nature of their work.

If this is the case, then you can have the ring be melted down and remade according to his or her new finger size – and be given as a gift that would endear you to him or her much more.

It Gets In the Way of Their Active Lifestyle

Your spouse may have a change in lifestyle or hobby that warrant him or her to remove any form of jewelry for better comfort, then that may be the reason why he or she stopped wearing the wedding ring.

He or she may be into active sports or have taken up gardening and is taking the ring off to avoid damage or for fear that it might get lost during such activities.

If he or she removes it during these activities but wears it back on when going out of the house or lounging in your backyard – then there’s nothing that you should be concerned about.

It’s a Sign of Dissatisfaction in Your Relationship

If your spouse has intentionally removed the ring from his or her finger for no apparent or obvious reasons such as those described earlier, then it can be an indication that something is wrong in your relationship.

If you have grown distant from each other or there’s a growing emotional chasm between you two, the removal of the ring from the finger symbolizes what he or she is feeling inside.

It can be dissatisfaction or a diminishing affection for you or it can be because the ring is a painful symbol or reminder of the good and happier times that you have had ages ago – that he or she is longing for today.

He or She is Cheating on You

As sad as it may seem, a spouse who stopped wearing his or her wedding ring can be an indication that he or she is having an affair or is trying to initiate one by hiding the wedding ring from plain view.

This may be evident particularly if you find him or her not wearing the wedding ring when going out to work or someplace else, and is hiding the fact from you.

You may catch them not wearing the ring when they get home, find it inside a pocket or a bag, and listen to them make many excuses for not wearing so.

What You Should Do About It?

There are many reasons why a spouse stopped wearing the wedding ring.

It may be something that you can actually remedy such as remaking the ring to its new size, or it can be as serious as a sign of problems in your marriage.

Before jumping to any conclusions, you must first establish the real reason why he or she is not wearing the wedding ring.

CLICK HERE TO CATCH A CHEATING SPOUSE

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How to Deal With a Cheating Wife

kajay — Thu, 29 Dec 2011 16:01:53 +0000

The number of infidelity cases throughout the world has risen tremendously in recent years.

While it may not come as a surprise that around 40 to 50 percent of husbands cheat on their wives, current studies indicate that the same trend holds true for wives with up to 35 or 40 percent engaged in some form of infidelity against their husbands.

The numbers about is a clear indication that even women are susceptible to infidelity and cheating in this modern age, where the channels for interacting with other people particularly from the opposite sex is as convenient as pushing a digital button.

The problem however is that many husbands are practically clueless about their wives’ extramarital excursions. Many are often left in the dark about what’s going on – and would find out about the affair when it is already too late for him to do something about it.

The Challenge in Getting Evidence

Dealing with a cheating wife is more challenging compared to a cheating husband in the sense that it is more difficult to gather evidence to prove her infidelity.

Women are naturally intuitive beings and would most often than not know exactly when someone suspects they are having an affair.

If they think that their husbands are onto them, they can easily control their emotions and would take a few extra steps to conceal their infidelity.

Unlike men, women can be very sensitive in every detail that they are doing and would be very careful not to let any clues lying around.

Whether she communicates with her lover through online or traditional means, she would be very careful to conceal the fact and would take extra effort to clean things up before she can be discovered.

Still, women are human beings and are prone to mistake and in the heat of their extramarital passion with someone else would be bound to overlook an evidence here and there that their husbands can pick up.

Understanding the Reasons behind Her Infidelity

Gathering evidence when you suspect your wife is cheating on you is one thing you need to understand, but learning the reasons why she is doing so is another. Women simply do not cheat on their husbands overnight.

There would be many underlying reasons that would push her into doing so and these reasons may have accumulated for some time, eventually putting her on the brink of infidelity from which she has succumbed to.

The reasons vary deeply. Financial security can be one of the most significant but often overlooked reasons why a wife would cheat on her husband.

Stretching the budget can be very tiresome for a wife and someone else offering her a luxurious way out can be a very appealing temptation that she can’t resist.

Another reason that is often overlooked is the natural need or tendency for women to seek attention, a basic fact many husbands often forget.

Women place great importance on beauty, communication, love and relationship – things men overlook in their preoccupation with work, money and achievements.

In the process, women would feel rejected and someone else who can give her the attention and self-esteem boost that she needs would find a special place in her heart – special enough to replace their husbands with.

Dealing with a cheating wife can be a very challenging task and many husbands would focus their efforts in trying to collect evidence that would prove their suspicions.

On the other hand, understanding the reasons why women cheat on their husbands can be the best way to protect the integrity of their marriage, for many of these reasons often seems insignificant that most men can act upon – before it’s too late.

CLICK HERE TO CATCH A CHEATING SPOUSE

How To Tell If Your Spouse Is On Dating Sites

kajay — Wed, 28 Dec 2011 01:36:43 +0000

The Internet has truly revolutionized many aspects of people’s lives today and continues to do so as more online marvels emerge and change the way people communicate and interact with each other.

The Internet has made many aspects in business, marketing and advertising much more convenient, mobile and efficient through online means and channels.

However, the Internet also made means for committing infidelity much more accessible for cheating spouses to exploit.

Social media networks like online dating sites provide a platform for unfaithful spouses to meet new people and cheat on their partners.

Sadly, only 46 percent of men think that having online affairs like these ones from dating sites believe that what they’re doing is a form of infidelity according to Divorce Mag, while most regard this as a harmless thing that won’t hurt relationships.

If you think spending time and participating actively in online dating sites is a form of infidelity and believes that your spouse is engaged in one, then you can use the following list as your guide for determining so.

You should understand that it would not be wise on your part to start making accusations before you have gathered enough evidences to support your claim – but whatever you intend to do after confirming so is all up to you.

* You can start by listing down both paid and free Internet dating sites. Some of the more popular ones include eHarmony, Match.com, and Chemistry.com among others.

You can search online for other sites and read reviews about those who are most frequented by people – and potentially your cheating spouse. Familiarize yourself with the names and the URLs of these sites.

* If you and your spouse are using the same computer at home, you can access the Internet browsers that your potentially cheating spouse is using to visit these online dating sites.

Aside from Internet Explorer, you can also check for other popular browsers such as Chrome, Firefox, Opera and Safari.

Each browser has unique features but you can check the browser history for websites that was recently accessed.

If you can’t find anything from the history, you can try typing in keywords and keyword phrases that can be associated with a dating site and see what will come up.

* There is a possibility that your spouse will try to conceal his or her online dating activities by accessing the site with the browser in anonymous mode, preventing their visits from being recorded in the history.

Or, your potentially cheating spouse may delete the browser history all together.

Missing chunks of browser history from the timeline when you are certain is in the same timeframe as your spouse’s online use is an indication that he or she is trying to conceal something.

* If you’ve identified the dating site that your spouse might have visited, you can create your own profile and join the site to verify if your spouse is indeed using the service.

Your spouse will most likely not use his or her name as their screen name handle but there is a greater likelihood that they may have used their first names.

You can narrow down your search for your spouse in any particular dating site by listing down the location, age range, ethnicity, hobbies, and other attributes that your spouse might use.

There are other ways that you can employ to check if your spouse is on online dating sites.

You can even use monitoring software that you can install in your computer but you can only do this if you and your spouse are using a common computer.

Again, what you will do with the information you gathered and your courses of action is up to you, but always remember to act only if you have sufficient evidence in your hands.

CLICK HERE TO CATCH A CHEATING SPOUSE

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How To Deal With A Cheating Spouse

kajay — Sat, 24 Dec 2011 17:11:05 +0000

Infidelity can be one of the toughest and the most heart-wrenching experiences anyone can ever encounter in their relationships with their spouses.

What makes the situation even more bitter is to realize that the person whom you’ve relied on and trusted with your whole being for so long is the very person who cheated on you and betrayed that trust.

Finding yourself in this kind of situation can definitely drain the life out of you particularly if they’re facing this crisis in their marriage alone.

The pain and the emotions can be so overwhelming that many find no more motivation in getting up in the morning everyday and face life normally.

But despite the pain and anger and all the other emotions bottled up inside, you can still learn how to deal with your cheating spouse – and finally overcome the stress and turmoil that goes with it.

Know that You are Not Alone

Before trying to find ways on how to deal with a cheating spouse, you must first realize the fact that you are not alone in this.

You are not the only one with a cheating spouse and you can learn how to cope with the fact from those who have gone through this same process ahead of you.

Statistics show that a fourth of the total number of married men and a tenth of married women admitted to having an affair – and that’s counting only those who admitted.

Of course, each individual situation is completely unique from another and the reasons that pushed a spouse to infidelity can be as various as the personalities of the person doing it.

The pain and the struggle that betrayed spouses are going through is the same all throughout the millions of people around the world dealing with infidelity issues.

The great thing is – there is still hope for healing and recovery.

Healing and Recovery

Infidelity can wreak havoc on relationships and destroy the bond between spouses and their loved ones.

It can cause ripples that can go beyond the immediate family circle and community and wreck whatever relationships a cheating spouse may have with other people.

If these ripples are not addressed properly, they can escalate even further and destroy whatever relationships you have left.

The first step towards healing and recovery from the pain inflicted upon you by a cheating spouse is to regain control of your emotional faculties.

You might be suffering anxiety or depression at this point but these emotions are actually part of the whole healing process.

There are many ways in which people deal with this. Many just run away from their problems and bottle up their emotions inside until they explode, or they choose to go on with their lives.

Living Your Life after Infidelity

To deal with the fact that your spouse is cheating on you and live your life once again is get hold of your emotions, rid yourself of the negative feelings swelling up inside you, and face the issue once and for all.

The end result may be different for many couples: either the hurt is too much and they eventually part ways, or they make the effort to address the issues and their relationships and rebuild what has been destroyed by infidelity.

Of course, the path may not be easy to do as simply as it can be read from any article but many have already gone and chosen the path of healing and reconciliation that they actually end up having stronger relationships, with a higher level of trust towards each other – and eventually a happy ending that everyone do so desire.

CLICK HERE TO CATCH A CHEATING SPOUSE

How To Deal With A Cheating Husband

kajay — Sat, 24 Dec 2011 17:07:19 +0000

Dealing with a cheating husband naturally is one of the most painful experiences a woman could ever have in this life.

However, reality would dawn upon you in one way or another and you will eventually need to make a decision as to how you would face this challenge and as to what particular end you like all this to ultimately culminate.

Before making any moves in this regards, you should first ask yourself the question on whether you still want to reconcile with him and recover whatever is left in your relationship – or finally deciding to sever all ties with him and end your marital union.

To get you on the right path, the following tips on how to deal with your cheating husband are provided.

* Avoid Making Rash Decisions

It is a normal thing to feel indignant, hurt and distressed after being cheated upon by the man you trusted and loved enough to commit yourself and marry.

However, do not let these emotions take control of your thinking faculties and force you to make rash decisions that you would most likely regret later. The truth may come as a shock but take control of your emotions so you can think clearly and make decisions that would be for your best interests.

* Do Not Withdraw and Isolate Yourself

Many women who just confirmed that their husbands and cheating on them can be overwhelmed by the experience that they tend to withdraw into themselves, isolate herself from her loved ones and friends, and withdraw behind the wall they built around themselves.

Doing so would only create lots or stress and tension within themselves that would affect their health and disposition.

* Keep Yourself Pre-Occupied

Do not let depression get a hold on you and spend your time brooding about your misfortune. Depression will not solve any of your problems and will actually add more.

To prevent yourself from slipping into a depressed state of mind, you need to keep yourself pre-occupied or busy with something else. Once you get your bearings straight, you can start thinking of your next moves.

* Seek the Presence of Your Friends

Instead of withdrawing and isolating in yourself, find solace in the presence of your friends. The best thing here is to look for friends whom you could confide with your emotions and what you are going through right now.

Good friends whom you trust can help you take control of your emotions and advice you into making the right kind of decisions regarding this issue of your cheating husband.

* Do Not Jeopardize Your Health

Women who slip into a depressive fit after finding out that their husbands are cheating on them can sometimes let such states prolong and take control of their daily lives from then on.

They will stop their normal activities altogether, and would even forget about their medications or lapse into improper eating behaviour.

You will only ruin your health if you allow this to prolong and will not provide you with the right solutions and decisions that you need at this point.

Dealing with a cheating husband is very painful and that is a given fact.

However, the proper way to deal with the situation is not to let your emotions take full control of your thinking faculties and allow your rational mind to think things clearly and make the right decisions that would eventually define your life in the future.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING HUSBAND

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Once a Cheater, Always a Cheater?

kajay — Thu, 22 Dec 2011 23:40:07 +0000

Man is a creature of habit and habits, particularly those that are already ingrained into their subconscious, define what they think, feel and act in their normal day to day lives.

This intrinsic characteristic of mankind is probably the basis for the old adage that “once a cheater, always a cheater” in the context of infidelity.

A man or a woman who has a history of infidelity or cheating against their spouses or partners, past or present, is believed by many to be susceptible or most likely to commit infidelity again.

But another intrinsic characteristic mankind has is his or her ability to enact changes in their lives.

People change as men and women have full control of their faculties and decisions – for this is what separates mankind from beasts.

People can change is they chose to and old habits can be replaced by a new one, although it may be hard for many people to do.

In the context of infidelity, the tendency to cheat again may not be considered as a generality for cheating is a serious offense, serious enough to warrant significant changes in the cheater’s outlook in life.

The act of cheating again may not necessarily stem from the fact that old habits really die hard, but may be resulting from external stimuli that would push the person to commit infidelity – one more time.

What Can Be Considered Cheating?

But before delving into the argument on whether a cheater is always a cheater and would commit infidelity every chance they got, one should understand first what really is considered an act of cheating.

This however, may be considered a very complex topic as what counts as cheating for one may not considered by another as cheating at all.

It would all depend on what the couple has agreed upon beforehand. A breach of that agreement can be considered as cheating.

It could be as simple as flirting with someone online or it can be as serious as inventing an out-of-town conference in another state for a few days – actually spent in the arms of his or her lover.

What it all boils down is that cheating is a betrayal of trust, regardless of whether the act considered as cheating is simple or not.

People Change… Or Do They?

A person who committed infidelity in the past but has learned to recognize his or her mistakes, repented from what he or she has done, and was honest enough to tell his or her spouse or partner about it can actually change and not cheat at all.

If they do cheat however, it could only mean one of two things: first, cheating is already a habit that is hard to eradicate under normal circumstances, or the person was pushed to do so again due to an outside stimuli.

As a habit, the tendency to cheat may already be deeply ingrained into their subconscious that it manifests itself in every situation the person may find himself or herself in that gives them the potential to cheat.

The person may not want to change, or he or she may sincerely want to do so but is having a difficult time overcoming this old habit.

The only way to overcome this is to develop a new habit that will replace the old one.

A person may also sincerely want to change and not commit infidelity or cheating anymore but circumstances beyond their control pushes them to do so in the end.

A husband may have a female co-worker who is literally throwing herself at the guy or manifested several sexual innuendos that makes it difficult for the guy to resist.

A wife who previously cheated on her husband may do so again if the husband fails to provide her emotional needs and finds them satisfied by someone else.

Is He or She Cheating Again? Watch for the Signs

Before jumping into conclusions that “once a cheater, always a cheater” and immediately accuse your spouse or partner of committing infidelity again, one should ensure that his or her accusations have sound basis or ample proof first before even contemplating of doing so.

He or she may be innocent of the accusations and are actually trying hard to change – which you can easily destroy by jumping into conclusion without basis.

There are however, signs that you can watch out for to know that your spouse or partner is cheating or not.

You can learn about these signs through the myriad articles and websites that talk about this subject.

You can also join training courses that teaches you how to detect lies from people through their facial expressions and body movement and discover if your spouse or partner is cheating or not.

The signs that manifest from a person who is cheating can stem from two potentials: from his guilt in having to commit infidelity again or from the simple fact that he or she wants to cheat again and is trying very hard to conceal the fact from his or her spouse or partner.

Signs that manifest usually include changes in speech patterns whenever the topic of cheating is brought up, or subtle changes in behaviour such as being secretive with his or her computers and mobile devices – even from you.

The Signs of Cheating are there Once More – What Should You Do?

To answer this question, you should first decide for yourself as to what end you would like all this to culminate: whether you decide to call it quits and call off your relationship, or would rather save your relationship and make the effort to do so.

You must first establish however that he or she is actually cheating again through the signs and the evidences that you collected.

Then ask yourself this question:

Is he or she doing this again repeatedly for some time now even though he or she made the commitment not to do so again?

An affirmative answer may warrant the need to think things through and consider ending your relationship.

If not, then it would be up to you to give him or her another chance – until the next time he or she did it again.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATER

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What Counts As Cheating?

kajay — Thu, 22 Dec 2011 23:34:28 +0000

In the good olden days, what counts as cheating in the context of infidelity simply involves a man or a woman engaging in sexual relationships with another other than their spouse or partner.

But in this modern day and age, what counts as cheating is something much more complex than that.

Back to the olden days, cheating is a very taboo act that seldom happens in a particular community that it actually horrifies people much when they hear stories about it.

The same could not be said true in the modern sense – as there are much grey areas in what people consider nowadays as cheating.

For some people, flirting with someone even in cyberspace is already considered cheating while some people at the extreme allow their spouses to have sex with someone else as part of their mutual agreement before making a commitment to each other.

Generally, what counts as cheating involves the violation of what was agreed upon in a relationship, whether it only involves flirting or casual sex with another.

Cheating is a betrayal of trust and the levels of trust among couples vary widely.

The following describes some of these variations in the modern context and it is up to couples on what particular situation applies to them and what they count as cheating in their relationship.

* In the Workplace

Accusations of cheating between couples usually stem from their spouses or partner’s activities in the workplace.

A wife may complain that her husband is cheating on her when all he did was had lunch and casual conversations with a female office co-worker.

The accusations may stem from a past case of infidelity that the husband committed in the past, or she may be reliving the hurt that she felt from a past betrayal with a previous spouse or partner.

The wife may be in the wrong for accusing her husband if the man really had no intention of committing infidelity and was just having a friendly chit-chat with a co-worker.

However, if they both agreed beforehand that such activities are considered inappropriate in their relationship, then the wife may have every right to be angry – anger for the husband’s betrayal of what they have agreed upon.

The workplace is the main breeding ground for infidelity.

In the modern business world, men and women work alongside each other and usually spend more time at the office and their co-workers than they do with their spouses.

Certain situations may occur between co-workers or between an employee and his or her boss that may prove to be the catalyst for cheating, particularly during times when they spend extended hours together working on a project or sent on an out-of-town conference.

* In Cyberspace

The Internet and the proliferation of social media networks make it so easy now for anyone to network and instantly connect with old friends, including old flings and flames, or even with someone else they haven’t even met in person.

It may start with a few chat exchanges here and there, but soon may find themselves getting involved more emotionally with their cyber buddies, sharing their hopes and dreams and desires – more than what they share with their spouses or partners.

Online affairs or virtual infidelity may seem harmless to some, pointing to the fact that no physical connection has occurred, yet.

But for many, virtual infidelity is considered a betrayal of emotional trust, particularly if the person involved spends more time online than they spend with their partners – and in many cases would invent situations to do so.

Another instance online where the act can be considered cheating for many is when the partner participates in a virtual world or community where they nurture an online affair and even engage themselves in cybersex.

The emotional attachments in such relationships can be so strong that people engaged in such activities would even take the next level up and pursue the relationship in the real world.

* Pornography and Prostitution

Pornography and prostitution in principle may point to the same thing except that in prostitution physical involvement of a cheating spouse with a hooker takes place.

Many consider engaging in prostitution or getting addicted with pornography as a serious form of cheating for the simple fact that the offending partner is denying the physical attention that should be given to their partners.

An integral part of marriage or a serious relationship between partners is their sexual relationship, mutually providing each other with his or her physical and emotional needs.

Engaging in pornography or getting sexual satisfaction through prostitution is like denying what your partner physically deserves – and that is well-considered cheating by many.

* Emotional Relationships

For many people, particularly those involved in serious relationships and commitment with their spouses or partners, cheating not only occurs in the physical realm but in the emotional aspects as well.

Even if they did not have sexual or physical relationships with another, their emotional relationships with someone from the opposite sex rob their partners or spouses with the emotional attention that they so deserve.

Emotional relationships usually begin among people who have an extensive connection with each other as in the case of office co-workers.

Due to length of time they spend with each other co-workers, friends, and even online buddies will get involved with each other emotionally more and more each day.

Physical relationships may not occur at this point yet, but engaging in an intense emotional relationship with another deprives the spouse or partner with their emotional needs.

Emotional relationships can also blossom much further with the partner involve losing their connection with their spouses or partners more and more each day.

Sooner or later it would traverse beyond the emotional plain and into the physical, eventually evolving into a serious physical and sexual relationship.

Cheating in the context of infidelity would definitely depend on what the spouses and partners consider or count as cheating.

It can be mundane as a harmless online chat with a cyber friend from half a world away, or as serious as a full-blown physical and emotional relationship with another.

It all boils down into one thing – betrayal of your partner’s trust – and that counts as cheating.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING HUSBAND

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When Does Flirting Become Cheating? 9 Red Flags

kajay — Fri, 16 Dec 2011 03:08:04 +0000

According to psychologist Michael Brickey, author of Defying Aging and many other relationship experts, playful bantering or gentle flirting with someone outside of your marriage is harmless if proper boundaries remain intact.

Those boundaries differ with each relationship, of course. What would be considered a violation in one marriage might be perfectly acceptable for another couple. Difference of opinions even occur within a marriage.

For example, I know a woman who recently asked her husband to either give her his Facebook password or close out his account after she found an email that he had sent to a former classmate that she found to be rather suggestive. He disagreed and thought it was perfectly appropriate.

Social media sites and online interaction are pushing this issue to dinner tables across the country — much more so than in the past.

Katherine Hertlein, a licensed marriage and family therapist interviewed by Discovery News, explains, “You don’t actually recognize that you’re growing closer to someone on the Internet because it just looks like you’re having a conversation, and that’s why I think it could be really seductive in some ways.”

Hertlein believes that cyber cheating is especially appealing to women because they can get their emotional needs met behind a computer in the comfort of their home.

However, many polls indicate that seemingly harmless online friendships often develop into intense emotional and physical affairs that can devastate marriages. Recent research has indicated that online cheating usually leads to physical encounters.

So, when does flirting cross that invincible line from innocent bantering to dangerous dialogue? After researching the topic and talking to a few family therapists, I pulled together the following 9 red flags.

1. When it’s secretive.

If you are deleting your emails — either to her or from her — that’s a red flag. Because by deleting them, you are guessing that your spouse would be upset if she read them, and that you are covering up something.

Moreover, ask yourself this question: “How would I feel if I knew my wife (or husband) was corresponding to an attractive man in the way I talk to X?” If you feel an uncomfortable knot in your stomach upon answering that question, there you go.

2. If it has a sexual agenda.

This isn’t always obvious, of course. But if you notice that your correspondence with this person feeds your sexual fantasies (because an affair is often about sexual fantasy), then you are probably in dangerous waters.

If the communications consist of subtle sexual overtones, watch out. If it feels like foreplay in anyway, that’s not good.

3. If you’re spending a considerable amount of time talking to him (her).

According to marriage therapist Allyson P., a person needs to consider not only the content of the messages sent back and forth but also the amount of them.

For example, if you are emailing a “friend” 15 times a day, that’s a tad extreme, even if the content is about SpongeBob Squarepants. A friend of mine confessed to me that she would spent two hours every night on Facebook chatting with an online buddy until she realized that was more time than she was spending with her husband.

4. If you are rationalizing.

“He is just a friend,” is a statement that you don’t say to yourself when you’re involved in innocent communication. Do you feel the need to justify a very safe friendship? No.

It’s obvious to you and to your mate that the companionship is completely appropriate. However, you may very well be investing in an unsafe friendship if you are constantly wrestling with guilt or feel the need to rationalize.

5. If it’s meeting your personal needs.

If you are getting your intimacy needs met in an online relationship or with a co-worker with whom you playfully banter, you might stop to ask yourself why.

Be especially careful if you’re sharing intimate sentiments with that person that you don’t share with your husband, or if you feel like your online companion understands you in a way that your spouse doesn’t. Be on guard if you are getting fed in any way by him or her that you don’t at home.

Better to address the holes in your life and fill them in safe ways, even if you can’t within your marriage. Keep in mind, a good sex life isn’t just about chemistry.

6. If you talk about your marriage or your spouse.

It’s disrespectful to share intimate details about your marriage or your spouse, and especially in a discourteous manner or with a flip attitude. Imagine that your wife was overhearing your entire conversation. Would you still say it?

7. If your spouse doesn’t like it.

You have just won a red flag if a husband or wife has expressed disapproval of your communications with X, because it usually means that either the content of the correspondence or the amount of it is off balance—that the interaction isn’t totally appropriate, or the time spent talking (online or offline) with the person is distracting from family life.

8. If your friend voices concern.

Pay attention if a good friend asks you why you are talking about this person so much, or if she says something like, “Wake up. You are married. He is married.

You need to focus on what you have and stop obsessing about what you don’t.” Friends, sisters, and mothers can often identify the red flags before a person is willing to recognize them herself.

9. If your intentions are wrong.

Let’s say your wife is constantly knocking you down, nagging at you, telling you to lose 20 pounds because she didn’t intend to marry a beached whale. The natural, or at least easy, thing to do is to find an attractive woman who will feed your ego and tell you that you’re sexy, funny, smart, and so on.

Some folks may unconsciously seek out an admirer to get their spouse to take notice of them. It can be effective! But it’s also manipulative. There are healthier ways to increase your self-esteem and regain the power that you have lost in your own home.

About the author

Therese Borchard writes the popular weekday blog, “Beyond Blue” on Beliefnet.com, and is a regular contributor to the award-winning blog, “World of Psychology,” on Psych Central.

She also blogs for several other websites, including The Huffington Post and PBS/This Emotional Life. Therese is the author of Beyond Blue: Surviving Depression & Anxiety and Making the Most of Bad Genes, and The Pocket Therapist: An Emotional Survival Guide .

This article was originally published in Psychcentral.com and reprinted with the kind permission of Therese Borchard.

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Signs That Your Girlfriend Is Cheating

kajay — Thu, 15 Dec 2011 14:38:09 +0000

Okey, so you have a girlfriend that you’ve been seriously dating for some time now. You’ve spent wonderful times together, shared fantastic experiences with each other, and for a while there you thought that you’re both ready for the next big thing… until things got hazy.

Lately, you’re noticing something weird in her demeanor but can’t seem to put your finger in it. You may not be a woman with high intuitive sense but men can also rely on what their gut feelings are telling them.

But hey, don’t rely solely on what you’re gut tells you but look for other signs that your girlfriend is cheating – before even conceiving of planning to confront her with your suspicions.

* A Bit More Glamorous

One of the most obvious things a cheating girlfriend may manifest is noticeable changes in the way she looks. She will suddenly become flirty and more glamorous in her appearance, in the same manner that you two first got together.

Some guys are relatively clueless and overlook this sign and thinks that her glamorous look is for his eyes – all the while it could be for someone else.

Of course, girls really want to look attractive, but if she is overdoing it and spends more time in the mirror than having healthy discussions with you – then something’s indeed wrong.

* Going Out… But Not with You

When you two got together notice how your girlfriend balances her time with you and with her friends, and in most cases spend more time with you that with anyone else. But if the signs have changed and she now spends more time away from you, then that’s a big red flag that something is up.

Time “away” from you can be work, out-of-town meetings or conferences, girls night out, or any other excuse not to spend the night with you – suspicious behavior that may indicate that she’s spending time with someone else.

* Clocks and Phones

Notice how your girlfriend doesn’t seem to mind the time of day or wherever you two were both are during the early stages of your relationship. She would spend the whole day with you and wouldn’t care less at what the outside world is doing.

But if things changed and she spends more time looking at her watch or cell phone than having eye to eye contact with you, then it should be considered a sign that something’s not right in your relationship.

Are you still the one in her mind? Or is she thinking of another and what he is doing at that time while she looks at the clock?

* From Warm and Cozy to Cold and Lifeless

Women are affectionate beings and would cuddle up to you feeling warm and cozy every time you get together. But has things changed?

Has her affection for you dwindled down to nothingness and what’s left is the core of a cold and lifeless shell of a robot that responds to your words in the same mechanical manner robots do? Does she even kiss you goodbye?

These may be signs that she’s losing affection for you and may be diverting it to someone else.

* Cold Shoulders

Sometimes, the guy who’s a victim of a cheating girlfriend will be the last one to know about it. Her closest friends may be on it and knows exactly what’s going on but out of loyalty will not even give you the slightest clue – until it’s too late.

You may notice the cold shoulders they are giving you, or the lack of fondness or familiarity that you used to enjoy with them. They may know the score and are trying to get out of the way.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING HUSBAND

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How To Tell If Your Wife Is Cheating

kajay — Thu, 15 Dec 2011 14:35:56 +0000

Before even discussing the ways of knowing if your wife is cheating or not, you must first understand and accept that you are partly to blame. Without sounding too offensive to husbands, but this statement packs a whole lot of truth in it not to consider.

It would take much for a wife to cheat on her husband, unless the husband himself has done many things that have hurt her in the past, or have done the opposite and neglected her and failed to give her the value she deserves.

Nevertheless, a cheating spouse is a cheating spouse and wives are no different although the underlying reasons may be different.

Husbands who want to know if their wife is unfaithful can do lots of specific stuff to confirm his suspicions and some of these things can be classified in the following:

* Put on Your Detective Hat

Hiring a private investigator may be too much for you and you may be wary in letting other people know what you are suspecting so the best approach is perform the investigative work yourself.

You must be observant enough to see pass through the veil that your potentially cheating wife has put up. Do not be overly suspicious or you will expose your plans.

A wife is good in controlling their outward emotions or mislead you away from the trail – so be wary

* Be Observant of Her Behavior

You must be very keen in observing the minute changes that your wife is exhibiting at home and when with you. There may be signs of guilt or remorse that she is manifesting or there may be signs that manifest that she is still trying to hide something that she is still very much engaged in at that very moment that she doesn’t want you to know.

She may lost interest in having long, healthy talks with your and if you do it would be very mechanical or mostly concentrated on trivial things.

She would rather spend her free time with friends that with you or find excuses not to go on dinners or dates with you.

Lastly, she seems to have lost her sexual appetite and would often point to headaches or not feeling well just to make an excuse and avoid contact with you

* Be Observant in Changes in Her Physical Appearance

Is your wife having a remarkable change in the way she looks, wears, styles her hair, and body language? Some men are clueless enough to think that the wife is doing these things for their eyes to feast on but considering other signs of cheating, these flirty changes in her physical appearance may not be for you

* Monitor Her Phone and Online Behavior

A wife that is spending more time online than what she allocates for you, particularly in social media networks and chat rooms, is a sign that she is involved in virtual infidelity, which can grow more serious to physical infidelity without you knowing about it.

Notice how she spends time sending messages on her mobile that she does not want you to see or immediately erases. If you have a chance, you might also try to check on her phone address list for strange names of men without surnames – names that you may or may not know

* Get Help from Your Kids

Your kids will be the first ones to know and realize that mom is doing something strange and that dad is not involved in it. They may feel neglected if she often goes out or tends to neglect things like helping them with their homework because she’s busy on the phone or online. Be their champion and ask them what else they notice about mom – and be ready for what you may hear.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING HUSBAND

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How To Catch Your Girlfriend Cheating

kajay — Thu, 15 Dec 2011 14:32:55 +0000

It can be one of the worst feelings for a guy to know that his girlfriend has cheated on him. They may feel very bitter and betrayed and the fact would definitely gnaw away at their bloated egos.

What makes it worst is the fact that most guys are clueless about what’s going on that he does not even notice that his girlfriend is engaging in acts of infidelity – until it is too late.

Well, guys can find some ways to check and find out if their girlfriends are cheating on them or not. It may begin with some awkward moments or slips of the tongue that would make a guy suspicious but just can’t seem to put a finger in it.

These techniques can take you out from the dark and help you finally shed light to your suspicions and put them to rest.

* Try not to let her get a glimpse of what you are planning if you want to seriously catch her cheating on you. Let her be complacent into believing that you absolutely know nothing about what she is doing and would continue to remain so – until she makes the mistake and give you the irrefutable evidence that you will need.

* Go back and re-examine the signs that you may have overlooked in the past. See through the veil that’s been clouding your visions and look for the telltale indicators that will show that your girlfriend is definitely cheating on you.

There are several changes in her behaviour, activities and established routines that would indicate that something’s not right.

This includes her distancing away from you or the lack of communication between you two – even through the cell phone. She may now appear too flirty or glamorous for no apparent reason and you feel in your guts that you were not the intended audience for such changes.

* Notice the changes in her routines or in her schedules such as frequent overtime work, out-of-town meetings, or lunches/dinners with the boss or clients.

She makes a lot of excuses to avoid spending time together with you and would rather spend time with her friends and other similar excuses.

You can hire a private investigator if you wanted to, but getting help from a friend that she or her friends doesn’t know to be your eyes and ears can be a more effective way or verifying if she is telling the truth behind her escapades or not

* The email and her mobile phone are sure fire channels where you can get really good evidence of her cheating. You may not have access to her accounts or devices but they way she uses these devices in your presence, such as being so secretive or locking her phones and accounts with passwords she does not want to share, may already be the proof that you need that she is hiding something from you – and that could be an affair with someone else.

* Watch out for some inconsistencies with her stories when you confront her with something from some other day. Don’t be too confrontational and simply appear that you’re just interested to know about her activities.

Catch her in the middle of something then drop these questions on her and keep her blindsided with your plans. She will try to explain things in ways that may be inconsistent – proof enough that she is lying to you

The methods described here are not foolproof and may take some time and patience to be effective. There’s one thing to remember though that guys should always consider – never accuse your girlfriends of cheating or anything unless you have sufficient proof of what she has done. Until then, keep quiet and let the evidence do the talking.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING HUSBAND

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How To Catch Your Boyfriend Cheating

kajay — Thu, 15 Dec 2011 14:30:35 +0000

If you’re ever wondering if there are other ladies out there suspecting that her boyfriend is cheating on them, then don’t feel that you’re all alone.

Statistics place the cheat rate for boyfriends and husbands at a high 50 to 70%. The sad thing is, only a few percentage own up to their cheating, leaving many women left in the dark still wondering if they’re part of the statistics or not.

There are ways however that could help women find out if their boyfriends are cheating on them or not. Just remember that infidelity and the signs that go with it vary greatly from one situation to another, as one relationship varies from another relationship.

If you suspect that your boyfriend is cheating and have no ample proof that you can use to confront him with, then the following tips can help you thread this path.

* Through His Behaviour

There are distinct signs of behaviour that a cheating boyfriend will exhibit. These signs can be classified either as an admission of guilt for what he has done, or an intent on lying and cheating and trying to get away with it from right under your noses.

These signs may include sudden changes in appearance, work habits, and external activities that do not include you.

Signs also include a noticeable change in his behaviour towards you, either becoming hostile or irritable, or distancing away from you and becoming less and less intimate.

You no longer have frequent dates or get togethers and when you do, the atmosphere seems cold, distant and mechanical.

* Through His Email

A cheating boyfriend would try to find ways of communicating with his other and the most common ways available is through emails and social networks.

It would be much easier if he’s lax in removing the autofill function in your web browsers or if he fails to erase his browsing history, leaving the door open for you to check out where he has been online and access the applications and websites that he recently used.

A cheating boyfriend who is doing these deeds intentionally might be very careful with his emails and online accounts to firmly secure them with passwords you don’t know, or have separate accounts to use that you know nothing about.

The good thing with social networks is that everything is connected and there’s a chance that an entry or post that would shed light into his activities appear on a mutual friend’s wall or news feed – so watch out for such entries.

* Through His Cell Phone

There is a big chance that you can catch your boyfriend red handedly with his cheating through his mobile phone. There may be messages, images, videos or calls that can reveal all. The only problem is when he always locks his phone and never let you get access to it.

You can try and catch him in an awkward moment such as finishing a conversation on his mobile phone, before suddenly borrowing it before he can complain in order to make a “fake” emergency call.

Pretend to dial numbers or making a “call” but what you are really trying to do is to look through his address book and check for suspicious numbers and names, particularly girl’s names you don’t know that are listed without surnames.

* Through His Activities

If he is going out alone and makes various excuses for doing so, that may be the perfect time to catch him red handedly by having someone follow him and gathering evidences as to where he has been and who he met up with.

Hiring a private investigator for this may be too expensive for you and getting help from friends may be too risky as a loyal mutual friend may reveal to him what you are planning and mess things up. What you can do is to solicit the help of a friend or someone you know that he haven’t seen yet or completely doesn’t know.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING HUSBAND

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How To Know If Your Boyfriend Is Cheating

kajay — Thu, 15 Dec 2011 04:59:48 +0000

Girls sometimes feel like they’re getting crazy trying to find out if their boyfriend is cheating on them or not.

They’ll spend sleepless nights wondering the same or spending moments alone thinking that their boyfriends is probably in the arms of another right at that very moment.

There’s no need for you girls to go through all that. Instead of worrying and wondering if your boyfriend is unfaithful, you can ask yourself the following infidelity questions that can help assess if there’s really something wrong in your relationship or you were just creating your own ghosts to haunt you for no sufficient basis.

* Does he have a history of cheating with past girlfriends?

Old habits sometimes never die and a person prone to cheating and infidelity in the past may continue to do so and repeat the act again in the future. There’s a chance that he might be doing the same thing all over again with you.

* Is your boyfriend still interested in sex with you?

The declining frequency in your physical moments together may be a sign that your boyfriend is sexually active with another and has no energy left for your own private moments.

He may give lots of excuses not to do it even if you were the one showing the initiative. Either he lacks the energy or is guilty enough to avoid physical contact with you.

* Is your boyfriend secretive with his computer use?

You boyfriend may be spending hours without end online, mostly browsing through social media networks and other related websites.

But in those instances, he becomes secretive enough not to let you in with what he is doing such as turning the monitor off or closing his laptop the moment you enter the room

* Is there a change in your boyfriend’s work schedule?

Take note of sudden changes in your boyfriend’s work schedule such as longer hours, overtime work or out of town meetings. These may just be excuses to meet with someone else.

* Is he going out with friends more than he does with you?

Take notice of the increase in frequency of his escapades with friends or boys-night-out moment, while spending less and less time with you. When was the last time you guys had a date? Is he making excuses such as previously arranged schedules with a boss or client or whatever – every time you ask him on a date?

* Is there a sudden change in the way he looks?

One of the most obvious tell tale signs that he’s up to no good is when he starts changing the way he looks and how meticulously he suddenly grooms himself. Notice the change in wardrobe, colognes and even toiletries. He may be trying to really look good for somebody – and that somebody might not be you.

* Is he locking his cell phone or deleting his messages and call history?

A person who has nothing to hide with his girlfriend doesn’t mind leaving his phone unlocked or messages read when his girl is around.

But if he suddenly becomes secretive with his phone activities, locks his phone without sharing his password, or gets angry if he finds you snooping around – then it’s a clear sign that he’s hiding something from you

* Does he answer his cell phone when you are around?

Another “cell phone” sign that smells like a cheating spirit is when he refuses to answer his ringing phone when you are around, or suddenly goes out the room or hides in the bathroom to talk to someone on the phone – but is never clear who he has spoken to when you ask him

* What does your gut feel tell you?

Sometimes, what your gut feel is saying can turn to reality and the same is true if you suspect him of infidelity. However, you must remember never to confront him with accusations that he’s cheating unless you have sufficient proof that he does. What happens next is up to you.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING HUSBAND

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Why Does My Boyfriend Lock His Phone?

kajay — Wed, 14 Dec 2011 17:24:49 +0000

The cell phone is one of the greatest contributions to technology man has ever devised. It revolutionized the way people communicate with each other, practically from any point where there is a signal or even while on the move.

It made the world smaller, brought people closer together, and saved countless lives from emergency situations.

However, the cell phone has also been a source of remorse for many, particularly in the context of infidelity.

As easy as it is to communicate on the cell phone with anybody, a boyfriend can also use this tool to cheat on you and will try to hide the fact by locking his phone and preventing you from gaining access.

If you’re in a serious relationship with your boyfriend and find that locking his phone serves as a hindrance that prevents you from going deeper into your relationship, then you must first understand the real reason why he is locking his phone.

He is definitely hiding something from you but it may or may not be infidelity – so, it would be to your greatest advantage to learn and find out what.

* It’s a “Man” Thing

Locking his phone may be his way of keeping part of his “manhood” before getting into a deeper relationship with you. Boys at any age are into a lot of mischief they never get tired of and this may include sexual adventures with his buddies.

This does not really mean that he is into something emotional or getting into a relationship with another girl, but maybe in engaged in something sexually promiscuous that he opted to hide these things from you.

It may not come as a surprise to some to find nude pictures of girls on their boyfriend’s cell phone, most of which may be “shared” by his friends – but it does not mean he is really cheating on you.

* It’s a Privacy Thing

Locking his phone may not be ample proof that he is cheating on you as he may be doing so because it’s a privacy thing. In a similar manner that you don’t want your boyfriend prying into your purse, bag or drawers, there are areas of privacy that your boyfriend feels that he is entitled to and this includes his cell phone.

So, if he does not exhibit other suspicious behaviour that indicates he is cheating, then maybe locking his phone is a simple act of maintaining privacy – even from you.

* He is Dealing in Something Illegal

This may sound farfetched for many but your boyfriend may be locking his phone when you’re around because he does not want you to know that he is dealing in something illegal.

No matter what “illegal” matters he is involved in, he may locking his phone to hide the fact and is doing so to protect you or he does not want you to get involved.

It can be as serious as this or it can also be mundane such as he simply does not want you going over his things.

* He is Cheating on You

Lastly, he may be locking his phone because he does not want you to know that he is engaging in something that is considered cheating or acts of unfaithfulness towards you.

However, locking his phone should not be your sole basis for concluding that he is cheating on you. There are other sources of evidence that you could look into to confirm your suspicions, although locking his phone can be a red flag that he is hiding something.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING HUSBAND

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How To Catch Your Husband Cheating

kajay — Wed, 14 Dec 2011 17:18:57 +0000

So, you’re one of those wives who may be wondering if your husband is cheating or not. The fact that you’re reading this article is reason enough to say that you feel something is not right and the only way to confirm your suspicion is to catch your husband cheating.

Well, short of hiring a private investigator to gather irrefutable evidence that your husband is committing infidelity, there are ways that you can use to finally determine if he is indeed unfaithful or not.

* Set Him Up for a Trap

There’s an age old saying that when the cat is away the mouse will play. Cheating husbands are like mice that would turn on their mischievous ways when the wife is away for a long time or out of town.

Set a fake schedule or plan a bogus out-of-town engagement that would leave him alone in the house for a couple of days – then spring your trap. Plan ahead and set up hidden cameras or recording devices in your own home. You can buy them cheaply and is legal if you set them in your own house.

* Set Him Up for a Trap Part 2

While the wife is away, a cheating husband may not commit his devious deeds inside their own homes for fear that neighbours or friends may see. He may opt to meet the other woman somewhere else, now that there is no wife to monitor where he has been.

Like a private investigator, you tail your husband inconspicuously, disguising yourself as someone else, and with a camera and a good set of binoculars with you catch him cheating with his mistress at their rendezvous point.

* Monitor His Cell Phone

A husband with a password-protected cell phone that he hides even to his wife will tell you that he is hiding something. Catch him in an unexpected moment and borrow his phone to make an urgent call.

Fake a call and while doing so try to scan his call logs and take note of suspicious numbers, length of call, time and date of such calls. Try to contact these numbers in another instance and find out who’s on other end of the line

* Monitor His Online Habits

A husband who stays online for an abnormal amount of time is a red flag that he may be involved in some hanky panky with another. Check the web browser history for sites that he is frequenting. Turn on the autofill functions in your browsers.

If your husband is not careful, his account and password for free web emails and social networking sites may still remain in memory and allow you access to check what he’s been up to

* Use Technology to Monitor His Tracks

Depending on which state you’re on, it may be legal to put a GPS tracking device on your property, and that includes your husband’s car.

These devices are very affordable and can be ordered through the internet (just have it delivered to another location where your husband is not aware of).

They are very effective in tracking the whereabouts of your husband’s car. Take note of the locations where he is frequenting – particularly if he has no business being there on a regular basis.

At this point, it would be wise to note and understand that trying to catch your husband cheating may not give you immediate results.

The key here is to be patient until you gather sufficient proof. Until you get firm evidence of his infidelity, never ever confront him nor should you accuse him of cheating.

Lastly, before embarking on this investigative quest, you must first establish as to what end this task will serve: whether you want to save your marriage, or throw in the towel and settle for a divorce. The decision is up to you.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING HUSBAND

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How to Catch Your Wife Cheating

kajay — Wed, 14 Dec 2011 16:54:37 +0000

When a wife becomes unfaithful, the fact would surely pack a wallop much harder than a punch from a heavyweight boxer. Women are emotional beings and it would take a lot of reasons for them to cheat on their husbands.

In most cases, husbands do not have the slightest idea that his wife is committing infidelity as she has far more superior skills in intuition and communication that she can easily cover up a lie.

But unlike men whose infidelity acts are usually one-night stands that would soon be lost to oblivion, women having an affair do it for mostly emotional purposes, although sexual intimacy might be involved, and would usually try to prolong the relationship.

The sadder part is that most women would engaging in such affairs would do so with someone she and her husband both know or are mutually friends with.

* Monitor Her Emails, Online Activities and Phone Calls

What a cheating wife and her lover need to accomplish their unfaithful deeds is a way to communicate with each other, and this can include emails, phone calls and social media channels.

The only way for you to gather sufficient proof is to gain access to her accounts and devices. Hacking is illegal but you can have software that you can install in your own computers (given that you have a common unit that you both use) that records the passwords being entered discretely.

This would not be possible if she has her own units so what you can do is monitor social media channels and take note of the minor details in her activities and correspondence in these channels.

It would be easier if she overlooked the privacy settings in her account, but someone who is intentionally cheating will make sure she got all these things covered.

Still, there’s a chance that a suspicious post or comment may slip through or appear in one of her friend’s feed.

* Create Your Team of Little Helpers

Seeking help from friends or families to help track her whereabouts may backfire on you due to loyalty issues that your friends have with your wife.

They may reveal what your plans are to your wife and ruin your chances of catching her, or was very wrong with your infidelity assessment and create a wound that may not heal in your relationship.

Short of hiring a private investigator to do the job, you can also seek help from distant friends that your wife doesn’t know about or have not met before, and ask them to follow and track your wife around, taking note of the people and the places your wife is meeting and going to.

* Use Technology to Spy on Her

Spy cameras or hidden GPS trackers may be illegal if your intent is to spy on your wife’s activities outside the home. However, you can put hidden security cameras in your own homes which can record videos or send the feed directly to your mobile devices whenever action is detected – and there’s a chance that it can capture your wife with someone in your home while you are away.

Leaving the decision to the reader of what to do next should he eventually finds out that his wife is cheating on him, these strategies are showcased with the intent of providing a guide that will help the husband in the decision process.

The key thing here is never to confront her until you have sufficient proof of her infidelity.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING HUSBAND

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How To Tell If Your Husband is Cheating- 6 Signs Of A Cheating Husband

kajay — Tue, 13 Dec 2011 14:39:11 +0000

Realizing that your husband, a person that you love and honestly trusted for a long time, may be cheating on you is one of the saddest and most heart wrenching experience a woman can have in her life.

Many have the tendency to disregard their suspicions or what their gut feel tells them, but as these suspicions increase you will find yourself wondering through sleepless nights, looking at the man sleeping by your side – is he unfaithful to me?

If you dared to find out the truth, you can look for tell tale signs that he is cheating on you. You need to be very observant and always on the lookout for minor details – for such details may tell you what you wanted to know.

This may not be an exciting or joyful task to do, but letting the truth evade you and letting things run their course can be considered a crime that you are doing to yourself.

To guide you in this path, the following tips can help you find out if your husband is cheating or not.

1. Before threading this path of discovery, you must first accept the fact that it is indeed possible that the man you married may be cheating on you.

Without acceptance, you will overlook minor details, changes in behaviour, and other minute facts that will tell you that he is indeed cheating

2. Look for the changes in his activity patterns and routines. Unless he changed jobs or got promoted or something, changes in his work patterns – overtime, emergency meetings, out-of-town conferences, going home late at night, etc – can be signs that he is up to no good

3. Look for changes in his physical appearance. Sudden changes in his wardrobe, hairstyle, toiletries and the amount spent grooming up for no apparent event or reason can be a sign that he is suddenly concerned about the way he looks – and not for you!

4. Notice changes in his behaviour around you. If you find yourself spending less and less time having fruitful discussions with him, often spending silent moments at the dinner table or in front of the TV, and avoiding physical contact with you – it may be a clear sign that he is guilty of something, and that something can be infidelity

5. Monitor his cell phone and computer usage. Is he being so secretive while using these gadgets? He may have started putting passwords or appear to hide something when you walk into the room while he is typing something on his laptop or keying a text message on his phone

6. Watch out for changes in his speech patterns. He may either talk less when around with you, or suddenly reacts negatively or defensively to words you say.

If ever you mentioned something that gives the hint that you’re trying to find out something, he may laugh it off nervously or hurl the accusations back towards you

Sometimes, wives trying to find out if their husband is cheating may overlook the obvious such as strange perfume smells in his car or clothing, calls that hang up when you pick up the phone, or strange receipts from a store way, way out of his normal routine.

Take note of these things and always remember to duplicate and stow away the evidences that you gather.

Never confront him without sufficient evidence.

If you finally have enough proof sufficient enough to confront him decide first what your final intentions would be – that you’re ready to give him up should he decide to let go, or will use this opportunity to settle things in your relationship and get it all back in track.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING HUSBAND

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How To Tell If Someone Is Lying

kajay — Tue, 13 Dec 2011 03:34:12 +0000

Deception is one word which has a meaning that people really despise, unless they’re the ones doing the deception, the cheating, and the lying.

Lying is the more colloquial term but either way would pack a heavy punch or two direct to the heart if done in the context of infidelity. A marriage or a romantic relationship is built completely on trust and deception will definitely ruin whatever foundation you have built upon.

The problem is people are not really keen on detecting lies. People have the natural tendency to accept anything said to them at face value and not waste time and energy trying to figure out if what the other person is saying as true or not.

But for issues of infidelity, the higher stakes involve will necessitate more efforts from the person in trying to detect signs of deception. Luckily, there are ways on how ordinary people can do this and the following can put you in the proper direction.

The “Lie to Me” Approach

This hit TV series got people amazed at how the protagonists detect lies from mere changes in facial features or what is scientifically called “micro expressions”.

Developed by known researcher Dr. Paul Ekman, the methods and techniques actually exist that would help people detect lies from a person’s facial expressions, eye movements, body language and speech patterns.

The science behind these methods indicates that a person’s inner emotions are subconsciously revealed through these micro expressions.

They don’t actually reveal if a person is lying or not but knowing a glimpse of what a person feels after hearing a particular phrase or question will reveal if he or she is hiding something or is trying to formulate a lie in response.

The Investigative Approach

Police detectives, FBI and CIA investigators utilize several tools and techniques to determine the truth about what a person under investigation is saying.

These experts utilize everything from profiling, bahavioral analysis and biometric responses from the nervous system using highly sophisticated lie detector machines to determine if the person is telling the truth or not.

Well, ordinary people need not undergo the same trainings as these investigative experts nor should they get hold of the high-tech equipment these experts are using.

What they can adapt are the telltale signs investigative experts look for when interrogating a suspect.

These professionals look for: signs of nervousness; analyze the content of what the person is saying; inconsistencies in the details particularly when asked to repeat several times; eye, body and hand movements or lack of them; reactions to eye contact; and speech patterns.

The Gut-Feel Approach

Unlike investigators interrogating a suspect they personally don’t know, a person trying to find out if his or her spouse or partner is lying to them and may probably be hiding their guilt in committing infidelity against them – knows the other person well enough to rely on their gut feel.

You know the intricacies, the small mannerisms, and even the micro expressions his or her spouse or partner exhibits under normal circumstances. Subtle changes can be a red flag to tell you that something is amiss and that he or she may be hiding something from you serious enough to tell a lie.

These methods are not foolproof though and are not guarantees that you can definitely detect a lie. These methods however are tools that will help you see the signs and warnings that will point or drive you to try and dig for more.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Carbon Monoxide Detector Hidden Camera With Recording (DVR) Review

kajay — Mon, 12 Dec 2011 22:06:20 +0000

Husbands and wives are called upon to be loyal to one another. However, what happens when the sin of temptation kicks in and one of the two decide to engage in adultery?

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This problem is being experienced by literally millions of spouses across the globe. Unfortunately, not all of these long suffering people have the resources to catch their spouses in the act or provide evidence worthy of use in legal actions.

The office workspace and the rooms of the house are becoming more and more prone to cases of adultery, and it is in such cases that the vigilant homeowner must act in order to protect what he has.

Now, with the Carbon Monoxide Detector Hidden Camera with Recording (DVR), you’ll be able to obtain the footage you need to catch adulterous perpetrators red-handed.

Features:

This handy surveillance piece (which can be placed on almost any stable surface) conceals a high-power camera that’s capable of storing a high-quality 640 X 480 optimum video recording.

Despite its main function as a camera, this nifty device comes with a variety of additional perks designed to offer more efficient surveillance operations. If you’re looking to cover more time on your camera’s system, a resolution-switch option allows the camera to record events from a lesser quality (320 X 240).

A motion detection option gives the camera the ability to record only suspicious changes within the scenery for easier recording, saving and viewing. Data transfer and playback is also no problem: just remove the 32GB SDHC Card from its magnetic key-activated hiding place, pop it on a card reader and you’re ready to go!

For those who don’t own a card reader, never fear: the Carbon Monoxide Detector Hidden Camera with Recording (DVR) can also be directly connected to your computer via cord, making it accessible to almost any system.

Plus, a small convenient remote control also gives the user the ability to turn on recording in just the push of a button, allowing for instant recording emergencies

Positive Points:

This ingenious new invention might seem like a simple CO2 detector, and, for all those not in on the secret, it is: a standard CO2 detection setup is present and fully usable in the external part of the device.

This seemingly innocent design allows for less interference and suspicion, ensuring better chances of catching cases of infidelity as evidence.

The camera’s features aren’t too shabby either: you can automatically select the times when you want the camera to record, which can cut down on power costs and on memory usage.

Plus, a bunch of additional accessories are included with the camera, such as an RCA cable for television and computer viewing, and an SD memory card worth hours of observation.

Negative Points:

Take care, however: despite the product working as an actual C02 detector, it’s probably best to purchase one with it as its specialty, since this one is primarily designed to serve as a hidden camera disguise and not for primary CO2 detection purposes.

The memory card included in the product might also not be enough for long-term investigations: customers might have to buy additional cards for more storage.

Also, customers might have to watch out for accidental on-and-off pressing of the remote control – no conspicuous wires and signal lights may mean less chances of detection, but it also means more chances of mistaken pressing leading to waste of video memory.

Conclusion:

This camera can be one of your most trusted allies in the fight against adultery.

Customers won’t pass up their chance to own one of the best security cameras on sale yet – for the man who has everything, the Carbon Monoxide Detector Hidden Camera with Recording (DVR) offers quality footage and easy access in a small yet very useful package.

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Color Recon AM/FM Clock Radio with Recording (DVR) Review

kajay — Mon, 12 Dec 2011 22:04:39 +0000

As one of the most undetectable and difficult misconducts in the family, adultery takes a large priority during family problems.

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Acts of this nature often lead to vicious confrontations, both physical and verbal, and more often than not end with divorce, separation, and the general break-up of the family.

However, spouses typically become hard-pressed to find crucial evidence of extramarital altercations, which lead to difficult to prove cases that only serve to prolong the suffering of either the doubting husband or wife as well as the rest of the family.

Brickhouse Security understands the need of some people to catch infidelity in the act.

Be it for evidence, closure or justification, Brickhouse has been able to deliver secretive and successful surveillance solutions, with a series of items that are mundane on the outside, but packed full of observational power on the inside, such as the Color Recon AM/FM Clock Radio with Recording (DVR).

Features:

This high-power camera system offers up to 16 gigabytes worth of video memory, with a SONY .05 Lux Camera set-up that offers you clear and crisp footage from day to night – when your observation area goes dark, a Nightvision option automatically kicks in for all-around recording.

Plus, the Color Recon AM/FM Clock Radio with Recording (DVR) is light on memory – a motion activation system records sudden change in the area in order to cut down on the frames and minutes you have to scan through.

To maximize ease of use, the 16 GB camera (good for days of information) can easily be transferred to the computer for clearer viewing.

To make sure no one disturbs or pays uncomfortably close attention to it, the camera is safely embedded inside an actual working clock radio, complete with emergency weather stations, fully extendable antenna, 50-mile digital tuner and portable battery back-up systems.

No inconspicuous lights or wires extend from the radio while it is capturing footage, ensuring that your perps won’t raise a peep at your radio for more than a few seconds.

Positive Points:

The Color Recon AM/FM Clock Radio with Recording (DVR) is a nifty little gadget that’s the perfect tool for catching suspected adultery or other criminal perpetrations, thanks to its impenetrable disguise that’s pretty hard to uncover!

This little camera can be placed on any part of your room – whether it’s at your desk, at a drawer, the living room, or the bedroom, no one will give a second glance at this inconspicuous yet ingenious device.

Thanks to the night-vision option, owners will be able to stage a round-the-clock surveillance campaign without the hassle of hiring qualified experts.

Plus, the highly customizable area-masking option (allowing for more specific times and ranges of recording) makes sure that you don’t miss a single second of important information when it matters the most.

Negative Points:

The camera’s complimentary card, although ample, might not be enough to cover long periods of camera footage.

Plus, because the product’s main function is devoted to capturing video footage, the auxiliary radio functions might not be as up to standard as other appliances with the same primary function.

Remote control activation might prove to be a hassle for absent-minded owners: the absence of priming lights also entails the absence of any signs that the camera is recording, thus requiring extra amounts of carefulness.

Conclusion:

With the Brickhouse Color Recon AM/FM Clock Radio with Recording (DVR), you’ll never have to worry about someone attempting to get one up on you! Confirm acts of disloyalty or infidelity!

You can even use the camera as a monitor for your children, ensuring that they don’t get into any danger while you’re not around.

This device can be one of the most important products you will own, especially in a world where safety and security is often compromised.

It’s a must have for any career man or woman, concerned parent, or watchful proprietor looking to make their lives a little more secure from adultery and crime!

CLICK HERE FOR COLOR RECON AM/FM CLOCK RADIO

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Wall Clock Camera with Recording (DVR) Review

kajay — Mon, 12 Dec 2011 21:48:40 +0000

Adultery is a crime that has been present in society for many years, yet it appears that the act itself has not died out.

CLICK HERE FOR WALL CLOCK CAMERA

Year after year spouses confront each other over affairs that have been found out too late, resulting in ended relationships and separated families.

What are worse are the cases where spouses might have the strongest feeling that their counterparts have been committing infidelity behind their backs, yet do not have sufficient visual evidence to prove it.

This might lead to husbands and wives being blamed for unfounded accusations, making the situation even worse.

However, thanks to the advancement of surveillance technology, people can now purchase specialized cameras that enable customers to keep a close eye on husbands, wives, co-workers, and persons of suspicion.

Now, with the Brickhouse Wall Clock Camera with Recording (DVR), Brickhouse Security, maker of superior surveillance products, offers you the chance to wage war on adultery and other secretive crimes without being detected yourself.

Features:

Designed to catch the most secretive of criminals in the act, the Brickhouse Wall Clock Camera with Recording (DVR) conceals a wide range of features that make it one of the most formidable security camera products in the market today.

Aside from performing the regular functions of the average wall clock, this marvel of surveillance technology also effectively conceals a high-performance camera that’s tough on infidelity but easy on power and memory usage.

The camera records at a 30 frame-per-second frame rate at a 320×240 resolution, or at 12 frames-per-second at a 640×480 resolution rate.

Owners can record standard quality footage for up to a staggering 96 hours, while wires and blinking lights are nowhere to be found as your suspect exposes his wrongdoings to its reasonable 380-line resolution camera.

For efficient storage, a Motion Detection/Area Masking system allows users to record only the most significant suspicious actions, while all footage can be saved in the free 8Gb SD memory card included with the camera.

Information transfer from the camera to the computer or TVcan be necessitated with an included RCA cable or with an SD memory card reader.

Positive Points:

With this wall clock-slash camera, you’ll be able to collect all the evidence you need against suspected acts of adultery.

The camera comes fully equipped with an 8 Gb SD Card, which allows owners to capture footage from the get-go, as well as an infrared remote control for mobile activation that’s undetectable to anyone.

With the highly customizable Area Masking System, customers can change modify the device in between degrees of movement significance, so that only the most suspicious of actions are recorded in the camera.

Customers can also set the camera to record only at specific schedules, guaranteeing savings on both electricity and the camera’s memory card.

Plus, if you’re the kind of person who needs the crucial information at once, the device’s motion detector enables recording only when significant changes to the environment occur, ensuring a detailed summary of all important events without the need to skim through countless layers of footage.

Negative Points:

The camera, despite offering only the best in video recording performance, only comes with a basic SD card, meaning customers might have to purchase additional cards for longer surveillance purposes (the camera can handle cards of up to 32 Gb).

Plus, careless customers might notice that the undetectable remote control-camera connection works a little too well: no signal lights means no proper prompt that the camera is currently recording, so be careful on pushing that control button.

Despite these hang-ups, the camera maintains a high standard of performance rarely reached by other surveillance equipment.

Conclusion:

High quality recording, easy capture and storage, a perfect hidden camera set-up and more make the Wall Clock Camera with Recording (DVR) a great choice for any critical surveillance operation!

The Wall Clock Camera with Recording (DVR) is an exercise in Brickhouse Security’s crime surveillance equipment expertise.

CLICK HERE FOR WALL CLOCK CAMERA

Radio Clock Camera with Recording (DVR) Review

kajay — Mon, 12 Dec 2011 21:46:26 +0000

Safety and security are two of the most important things that a spouse wants for his or her family.

However, even this most essential of needs can be disrupted thanks to the presence of adultery, a crime which has torn apart several families and has ruined many lives.

CLICK HERE FOR RADIO CLOCK CAMERA

Brickhouse Security understands the need for security, finality and justice, and has released a series of video security cameras that offer a sure-fire way to get evidence against would-be adulterers.

If you’re in need of a good camera to subtly detect and prevent theft before it happens, look no further than the Radio Clock Camera with Recording (DVR).

Features:

Disguised as a typical radio-clock combination, the secondary features of this camera enable it to pass itself off as a simple bedroom decoration thanks to the fully functional iPod dock, AM/FM radio and alarm setup included within the device, as well as the typical power cord used for regular clock radios.

However, it is in this inconspicuousness that this hidden camera proves its ingenuity – it’s so obscure that unfaithful spouses, suspicious nannies, maids, and co-workers won’t even give it a passing glance as they proceed to incriminate themselves on the ‘radio clock’s hidden camera.

A full-color, 520 line-resolution Sony CCD camera is the centerpiece of this radio-clock combination, with a night vision option for 24-hour video coverage. Capture important video evidence at an optimal 30 frame per-second capture rate, with screen sizes of 320×240 and 640×480 (at a 12fps recording option).

For additional surveillance versatility, the camera also comes with a built-in microphone system, as well as a remote controller for long-distance and/or emergency set-up.

For playback, the device can be combined with an AV cable for viewing in computers and television sets, or be separated from the 4GB SD memory card included in every package.

Positive Points:

With this camera, you can position your viewpoint from any angle possible without perpetrators noticing, giving you the advantage of a watchful eye on your possessions.

Plus, the pinhole-sized lens allows the camera to hold up to even the most scrutinous of inspections, guaranteeing you a surveillance post at all times. In addition to a high quality video capturing performance, the Radio Clock Camera with Recording (DVR) also does all the functions of a regular radio clock camera.

Each of the auxiliary audio and alarm clock functions work the same as a typical, non-hidden camera alarm clock, guaranteeing more uses for this fine product. Plus, memory storage offers up to 80 hours of footage, with the camera being able to hold up to 32 SD memory cards for lengthened surveillance.

Negative Points:

Although the camera comes with a brand new set of SD cards, the included storage devices only store a fraction of the actual memory capability of the camera – customers may have to spend a pretty penny in order to complete extended hours of video surveillance.

Plus, despite the presence of a motion detection-recording function that saves on both viewing time and memory, customers might not be used to skips or cuts in the footage captured. A bit of tweaking might be required for owners to implement day-long surveillance with this camera.

Plus, the absence of any exposed wires or lights, although improving its status as a hidden camera, might cause confusion for those using the included remote, as it might be difficult to detect if the camera has already started recording.

Nevertheless, the camera remains infallible in its overall recording quality, storage and transfer performances.

Conclusion:

Multi-functional, reliable, and able to carry out the most secretive of observations, the Radio Clock Camera with Recording (DVR) ensures safe surveillance against adultery for all of your most important locations.

CLICK HERE FOR RADIO CLOCK CAMERA

Air Ionizer Color Hidden Camera Review

kajay — Mon, 12 Dec 2011 21:42:38 +0000

It has long been a promise between a husband and a wife to protect each other, stand by one another in times of need, and, above all, be faithful to one another. However, as our way of life continues to progress, the specter of infidelity continues to form a shadow around the safety of the family.

CLICK HERE FOR AIR IONIZER COLOR HIDDEN CAMERA

Fortunately, advances in technology have enabled spouses in need of justice to spot their husbands or wives in the act.

Today, Brickhouse Security offers the most reliable surveillance methods yet with the Air Ionizer Color Hidden Camera, a high quality device that’s guaranteed to help anyone put a stop to any acts of infidelity in the home or office.

Features:

This innovative device looks and feels like an ordinary air ionizer – users can attach it to the same outlets and surfaces as a regular ionizer. By all external purposes, it is an air ionizer – thanks to the camera’s no-light recording set-up, owners be getting all the evidence they’ll need without tipping their targets off.

All the targets will be seeing is an insignificant little air ionizer, while you capture important footage in style with the ‘air ionizer’s Sony Ex-View Nightvision camera. This small yet powerful camera captures at a rate of 30 frames per second, the ideal standard for most modern cameras.

It automatically switches to night-vision mode when needed, for maximum surveillance day and night. If the camera’s 80 hour footage capacity isn’t enough to prove its high capacity power, the system is also supported with a motion capture system.

This enables the camera to filter out useless footage and cut straight to important parts of the surveillance operation. The camera’s memory is powered by a pair of 1 Gb cards that easily fit inside a hidden compartment in the air ionizer.

Viewing can be done in a different ways: transfer the memory into any card reader, or connect the device through an RCA cable for direct computer viewing.

Positive Points:

The Air Ionizer Color Hidden Camera was built to satisfy optimal surveillance needs, a promise that’s reflected in the various features of this state-of-the art camera.

A disguised appearance is one of the main attractions of this device, and thanks to the fully functional air ionizer built to house the camera, there’s no possibility of detection.

To complete the disguise, a working night-light also gives off the genuine feel of an actual ionizer, without letting people know of the camera behind the grill.

Customers will also love the remote control that comes with the set-up, which allows from immediate activation of the camera for emergency situations.

Playback and storage can be a breeze for customers thanks to multiple storage and viewing options, ensuring fast and easy viewing.

Not only can it help catch crimes of adultery, it also actually works to purify rooms, making it a multi-functional, highly-disguised video capturing product.

Negative Points:

Although the camera provides high quality viewing for any operation, owners might want to buy more memory cards for constant week-long or month long surveillance.

Plus, the absence of priming lights when using the remote control gives no sign that recording has been turned on or off, requiring close attention from careless customers.

Nevertheless, Brickhouse’s latest security camera offering remains a top-notch choice for camera recording thanks to its high-quality footage delivery, time-saving motion capture option, and other handy features.

Conclusion:

If you’re looking for the perfect tool to catch cases of infidelity in the act, the Air Ionizer Color Hidden Camera can become your one-stop tool for all your secret surveillance needs.

Owners will never have to worry about spouses, co-workers, maids or nannies committing infidelity or any other crimes behind your back, thanks to this marvel of modern video capturing technology.

CLICK HERE FOR AIR IONIZER COLOR HIDDEN CAMERA

How To Spot A Liar By Micro Expressions

kajay — Sat, 10 Dec 2011 17:02:42 +0000

The popular TV show “Lie to Me” awakened the imagination of individuals worldwide, particularly those wanting to detect lies and truth behind their spouses or partners micro or subtle expressions – in an attempt to catch them with their unfaithful acts.

The term micro expressions has now become a buzz word and people are trying to find out if they too can spot a liar based on these minute expressions.

In a general sense, the effectiveness of using micro expressions for detecting liars is based on the fact that such subtle expressions are mostly involuntary expressions that manifested at a certain particular moment.

These expressions are quick but intense and are manifested if the cheating spouse or partner is trying to conceal things related to their infidelity.

These expressions can appear and disappear in a manner or seconds or even a fraction of it that it would be difficult for the untrained eye to look for it.

The following discusses micro expressions in the context of detecting cheating and lying spouses or partners guilty of committing infidelity or engaging in unfaithful acts.

At this point, it should be wise to note that these methods and techniques should not be your sole basis for detecting liars, but should fuel your curiosity to dig for more truth until you find irrefutable evidence that your spouse or partner has been unfaithful to you.

What are Micro Expressions?

The TV series “Lie to Me” was pointed out earlier as a major influence to the popularity and buzz surrounding micro expressions and how they can be used to detect lies.

In the show however, the characters display mastery of the techniques that they can easily exclaim that the other person is lying from mere manifestations of micro expressions.

For real-life lie detectors, micro expressions are just ample tools that will tell them that something is not right and will prompt them to dig for more information.

So what are micro expressions?

In a more technical sense, a micro expression is a brief facial expression, usually lasting 1/125^th of a second, manifested by a person trying to hid or suppress something.

They can tell a lot about what the person is feeling and can be utilized to detect if another person is lying.

Many people cannot detect micro expressions under normal circumstances but with ample training they can begin to improve their recognition abilities and detect most micro expressions manifested by people.

Combinations of micro expressions can tell what the person is feeling inside and will manifest in an expression that people are quite familiar with namely: Anger, Contempt, Disgust, Fear, Happiness, Sadness and Surprise.

If used independently, one cannot detect lying by micro expressions alone but should be used with other factors such as speech patterns, body language and the actual words a suspected spouse or partner is saying when confronted with issues on infidelity.

The Science Behind Microexpressions

Understanding micro expressions is actually a distinct and separate field of study that has been developed over the years by researchers and experts in human behavior.

The most popular work was performed by Dr. Paul Ekman, who devoted years in studying emotions and facial expressions to co-develop the Facial Action Coding System of FACS together with another famous researcher Wallace V. Friesen back in 1976.

In his more than 40 years of studying facial expressions, Dr. Ekman was able to catalog more than 10,000 facial muscle combinations that when combined can form facial expressions that will reveal what a person is feeling inside.

Slight changes in these facial expressions in the form of micro expressions can help reveal if a person is lying or not or if he or she is trying to hide something they don’t want revealed.

Detecting Lies through Microexpressions

Dr. Paul Ekman’s study may be too extensive for ordinary men and women to use or study, but anyone interested in learning how to detect a liar using only micro expressions can do so with the many programs, courses and books that are available.

It can be a useful tool that can help people determine if their spouses or partners are trying to hide something from them – something that will affect their relationships.

Before beginning an interrogation process in an attempt to catch a cheating spouse or partner through their micro expressions, it is important that you begin with baselining first. The process involves initiating a normal conversation and asking questions that you probably know the answer already. The purpose is to establish a baseline for their eye movements, facial expressions, vocal patterns and eye movements under normal and relaxed conditions.

Once you have your baseline, you can begin asking questions related to infidelity and observed their reactions through their facial and micro expressions. Look for subtle and obvious deviations to the baseline you established and other abnormal expressions that will be manifested. Things to look out for are: rapid blinking; smirking when they should be sad; disgust; fear or anger and the inconsistent micro expressions that they manifest in brief flashes.

Focus on micro expressions through the suspected person’s lower and upper face areas. Watch out for muscle twitches, tics and other movements that won’t normally manifest if the other person is relaxed or under baseline conversation conditions.

For purposes of detecting lies, craft your questions in a way that you would expect a particular emotion or expression to be manifested on the face of your spouse or partner. At the same time, take note of the micro expressions that will betray what they really feel inside as these can be your key to determining if they are speaking the truth or not, or is hiding something they don’t want you to know about.

Detecting lies is a very difficult tasks to be done if you’re untrained or have no knowledge of the intricacies of human behavior particular with respect to facial expressions.

You would need hours of training to recognize what a particular micro expression is trying to say.

The key thing here is that you become aware that there are such things as micro expressions, and with simple knowledge and training, you can harness the power of micro expressions – and finally learn the truth about infidelity.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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How to Detect Lying By Facial Expressions

kajay — Sat, 10 Dec 2011 05:52:08 +0000

Lie detecting is a very serious and very difficult task to do, otherwise there would be less criminals and cheating spouses and partners.

Many have failed in this area, in real life or fiction, as immortalized by Othello when he killed his wife Desdemona, misinterpreting her tears over the death of Cassio as one coming from an adulterer.

What this states is that the obvious expressions of emotions are not necessarily indications of lies, particularly in terms of infidelity issues.

Luckily, experts and researchers over the years have studied this more closely, finally arriving in principles that would enable one to detect lying through the facial and non-verbal expressions they exhibit.

Although these methods are not entirely exact and should not be used as a sole basis in pinpointing or accusing a spouse or partner as performing acts of infidelity, what people can learn from reading facial expressions can point them in the right direction towards indentifying the truth.

The face has a direct connection to the internal processes going on inside a person’s body when communicating with another, and these processes or their manifestations increase when involved in deception, particularly those pertaining to acts of infidelity.

There are many things that can be discovered through facial expressions as people rarely have the faculties to suppress or control what their faces are manifesting.

Principles behind Lie Detection using Facial Expressions

The study on facial expressions and how they related to deception has been studied for several decades past, but it was Paul Ekman who established the more widely accepted principles behind lie detection using facial expressions.

However, he established that there is no single facial expression that will establish that a person in question is lying, but rather a collection or combination of expressions, body language, speech patterns as well as the underlying behavior of the person.

These methods of detecting lying trough facial expressions is not foolproof though however, a person suspecting his or her spouse or partner to be cheating, lying and engaging in acts of infidelity can use these methods to warn them if something is indeed not right.

They know their spouses or partners more intimately than others under normal circumstances so they can be the best judge if there are certain changes in their partner’s facial expressions or speech patterns that would indicate that the other person is lying – particularly if confronted about infidelity.

Catching Infidelity through Facial Expressions

Normal people are not trained like the CIA or FBI experts to detect the minute facial expressions and elemental behaviors that would tell is a person is lying or not during interrogation.

To catch a liar through his or her words and facial expressions needs more skills and cognitive processing that would take years to master.

However, there are certain methods and techniques taught by Paul Ekman and other experts in the field that would provide a simple system that would help people detect hints of deception when discussing things with their spouses or partners, particularly with things pertaining to infidelity.

Again, it should be repeated that these methods are not final in themselves but rather a guide to use that will point a person towards his or her next steps in finding the truth behind their partner’s suspected infidelity.

Taking note of facial expressions is not enough. The speech patterns, body language and other intricacies demonstrated by the person in question should also be noted and collated as a whole later on.

A spouse or a partner knows a person’s normal behavior. When trying to detect lies through facial expressions, it would be a wise thing to separate expressions that are habitual to the person in question. Focus on spotting things that have deviated noticeably from what you normally see.

When asking questions, design it in a way that the other person can trap himself or herself with their own words by letting them explain themselves regarding a particular situation. Push them on by asking them why they are stumbling over their words, or appear skeptical with any suspicious item or information he or she just stated.

During interrogation, it would be best to remain silent most of the time and let him or her do the talking and explaining. If you do speak out, always mention his or her name. Do not appear indignant or interrogative but rather pose an understanding demeanor.

A person who is lying will blink more frequently and may have uncontrollable tics on his or her face. Always maintain eye contact when asking something and never break this eye contact to maintain your advantage. A lying person may have the tendency to break eye contact when trying to explain something using fabricated stories.

Another facial expression to look out for is the blushing, blanching, sweating and heavy breathing that would manifest in their faces if caught off guard and trying to lie his or way out from the tight situation. Aside from the seemingly nervous expressions, it would also be good to note their speech patterns: pauses, stumbles, mumbles, high pitches, and low pitches.

The widening of the nostrils and the tightening of the lips are some of the facial expressions that may be exhibited by a lying spouse or partner. They will also appear to look very pale while rubbing their noses or covering their mouths while trying to explain their side. You may also see the gaps between the eyebrows closing in.

There are several other facial expressions or what Paul Ekman termed as micro-expressions that will help someone wanting to know the truth detect deception or lies while talking or discussing with their suspected spouses or partners. It would take very extensive studies to learn more about these facial expressions.

Again, it should be reiterated that these methods are not foolproof and should not be anyone’s sole basis for detecting lies. But for practical purposes related to detecting infidelity the methods above can be quite useful to guide the person in the right direction.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Am I Jealous Or Is My Partner Really Cheating?

kajay — Fri, 09 Dec 2011 18:26:44 +0000

One of the most miserable feelings anyone can have, particularly with regards to their relationships, is not knowing who or what to believe in.

You may have assumptions or suspicions that your spouse or partner is unfaithful to you and that he or she is committing infidelity right from under your noses.

You despise the fact that he or she has made a fool out of you – but then again, are your suspicions without basis and that you are the one going crazy and making a fool of yourself?

Jealousy is a perfectly normal behavior for someone who truly cares and loves his or her spouse or partner more than anything.

However, constant jealousy and worry that gnaws away at your being on a daily basis is not the way to go through a relationship – unless you find irrefutable proof that your spouse or partner is really having an affair.

But if your basis for jealousy is something you just created in your mind, you may be on your way to destroying your precious relationships.

People make assumptions and people do have suspicions that lead to jealousy, but jumping into conclusions based on those assumptions without first verifying if these are true or not is an irrational act that will not only destroy your relationship but will destroy you as a person as well.

So before jealousy controls your being, you must learn how to control your jealousy so you can have a clear mind and disposition to verify and confirm if your partner is cheating or not.

Controlling Your Jealousy

Assumptions and suspicions are natural things that occur to anyone, for people are all rational and thinking beings and emotions such as these sprang from what they see or hear.

These assumptions and suspicions are fueled by the stories we hear and the images they form in your mind. However, acting on an assumption without first collecting and confirming the evidence, can have damaging effects on your relationships.

The rational thing to do is to not let jealousy take control of you and your decisions if the bases for such jealous feelings are assumptions and suspicions you just created in your mind.

By controlling your jealousy, you can be in the right frame of mind to investigate objectively and learn the truth behind your suspicions – and confirm if your partner or spouse is engaged in unfaithful acts or not. You can control your jealousy through the following:

Take a Few Moments to Check Your Feelings – If you hear a story and negative assumptions begin to cloud your mind, take a few moments to think things through and have a reign on your emotions. You have no way of confirming if these stories are true or not right at that very moment so you must remain calm and maintain a neutral demeanor until you confirm the truth behind such stories.

Analyze Your Assumptions More Closely – Making assumptions without concrete basis can be completely inaccurate. You may be jumping into conclusion and put yourself in a jealous rage whenever you see someone from the opposite sex talking with your spouse or partner. Better making any rash actions, check yourself and examine your assumptions more closely. The other person’s intention with your spouse or partner may be completely innocent and your jealousy is completely unfounded.

Gather More Information – Instead of letting your jealousy control your emotions, try to restrain your jealousy by getting more information. Of course, getting more information does not mean confronting your significant other and asking bluntly if they are cheating or not. Gather more information and details about a particular situation by asking other people or even your partner – but be sure that you are in a calm state of mind, asking questions not in a very interrogative matter but rather in a curious, matter-of-fact demeanor. Never throw accusations at this point or you risk damaging everything.

Beyond Jealousy: How to Confirm Infidelity

The only way that you could put jealousy to rest is to confirm for yourself if indeed your assumptions have sound basis and your spouse or partner is really having an affair or not.

Making rash accusations without first confirming your jealousy will only make your spouse or partner defensive and angry, especially if they are completely innocent of your accusations – creating a serious wound that may not heal in your relationship.

You can learn how you can go beyond your jealousy and examine the truth that triggered these feelings and confirm if your spouse or partner is indeed cheating and committing acts of infidelity.

You can start with the following ways:

Make a Rational Analysis of What’s In Your Mind – The mind has its way of playing tricks with anyone. People’s imagination can run wild and visualize images and situations that they believe is true. Break through these fragments of thoughts and analyze for a moment where these visions and images came from. Were they results of a feeling that came to you after hearing a remarkable and not necessarily true story about your spouse or partner? Did these images flood your mind and you just allowed your imagination to take free reign?

Before these images take control of you, try to relax and clear your mind. At that very moment, you still don’t know or have no means available yet to confirm the truth behind these images.

When you feel you are in a rational state of mind then start analyzing the facts – and start deciphering what you should believe as truth or not.

Look for Indisputable Evidences – There are several articles available in this series that teaches people how to look for the small details in the way their spouses or partners act that would give a clue to their infidelity, if it indeed exists. From there, you can start collecting evidences that would point you in the right direction until you have gathered enough indisputable fact that would confirm the truth behind your jealousy

Listen to Your Gut – What does your gut feelings say about the situation? You know and are very intimate with your spouse or partner and any changes in behavior or activity pattern will trigger your gut feelings that something is amiss. However, do not act irrationally based on gut feelings alone but use them to point you in the right direction as to where you should dig for more evidences and finally settle your jealousy issues once and for all.

Jealousy can eat away at a person and may cause serious health issues if not addressed or nurtured for a long time. Jealousy can also damage a once perfect relationship, particularly if you acted irrationally without first confirming the truth.

It all boils down in finding the truth but this would rely on a rational and investigative course of action – and not from what images and visions brought to life by sheer jealousy.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

How To Tell If Someone Is Lying Over The Phone

kajay — Fri, 09 Dec 2011 18:22:42 +0000

Spouses or partners who have known each other for quite some time will grow familiar with each other’s intricacies and minor details in their behavior and mannerisms that they would know if one is lying to the other.

That is however, if they are having a face to face conversation. A person who’s lying will manifest certain mannerisms such as chewing on their lips or looking away from eye contact. It would be easy to detect such small things if one knows the other person well.

However, the same could not be said as true when it comes to talking on the phone.

With only the other person’s voice as your guide, you simply cannot look into the gestures and mannerisms that will tell that the other person in lying or trying to hide the truth.

That’s why many spouses or partners have gotten away with infidelity as they can concoct stories or make up excuses over the phone that can justify their escapades – and the person on the other line haven’t even realized that he or she has been deceived by the other.

There are some things that you can look for during a phone conversation that will tell you that the other person you are talking to is lying to you or not.

If you suspect that your spouse or partner is deliberately lying to you on the phone, most probably in an attempt to hide or divert your attention away from an unfaithful act, then you can use the following methods described next and catch the verbal cues that will tell you – and spot the lies behind the words.

Preparations: Setting Up to Catch the Lie

There are some things that you can look for during a phone conversation that will tell you that the other person you are talking to is lying to you or not.

You can catch a lying in their game through conversations on the telephone and you can set them up using the following strategy.

The key to this strategy is not to let your suspected spouse or partner that you are on to them. Your aim should be to put the other person at ease, not to be interrogative in your demeanor, and establish a casual discussion over the phone. Note his or her speech patterns and how he or she pronounces or delivers his or her words.

Plan how you would bring your discussion to the core of your issue. This will catch them off guard, particularly if they have been already at ease with you during your earlier conversation. At this point, take special note of the changes in his or her speech patterns, the changes in tempo, and the changes in the sound of his or her voice.

Be ready for his or her attempts to change the subject. A person lying will as much as possible try to avoid the topic that will incriminate them. Be in control and bring the subject back after any attempts for diversion.

Be ready for hostility. Bringing up a subject such as infidelity will draw out hostility from the other person. They may try to avoid the issue by pointing the blame or accusations back to you. Remain calm and don’t give in to their outbursts. Stay in control of the conversation and always be on topic.

Be ready for attempts to confuse you. A lying person will try to create confusion by repeating questions, give incoherent answers, or give an answer that is completely off from what you were asking for.

Use a speakerphone during conversations with a suspected lying spouse or partner. Not only can you amplify his or her voice but it can also capture and amplify other elements and nuances such as breathing patterns, sighs, inflections and other similar peculiarities. Knowing that you’re talking through a speakerphone will also put their nerves over the edge, giving them the feeling that they’re in a hot seat. You can also record your conversation to listen to later.

Lying Indications over the Phone

Now that you have the strategy, you can take note of certain elements in your conversation that will indicate if your suspected spouse or partner is lying to you over the phone.

Most likely, he or she will be incoherent with half of the words they will say, but the manner they deliver those words will give you some clear indication that they are hiding the truth.

If caught off guard, a suspected spouse or partner will remain calm and relaxed during the shift in your conversation and will sometimes find what you’re doing amusing. On the other hand, a relaxed speaker that suddenly becomes nervous or awkward in his or her words after you pop the question is most likely lying.

Take note of the shakiness in his or her voice and not from a bad connection or signal if he or she is using a mobile phone. A shaky voice is an indication that he or she is uneasy and is trying to hide something when caught off guard.

In a similar manner, stuttering is another indication that the person on the other line is trying to make up some lie after being caught off guard with your sudden question. Another variation is when you hear them constantly swallowing. This is an indication that they feel really nervous and is doing a feeble attempt to hide something from you.

Listen for some odd noises in the background that would indicate that they are not where they are supposed to be. He or she may be telling you that they’re in a meeting when you hear cars passing by or other street noises you wouldn’t find in a meeting room.

Watch out for long pauses. If you catch them off guard and drop a serious question and then they suddenly stopped answering or talking with only their heavy breathing coming out from the speaker, then he or she may be trying to make up a lie in reply to what you just asked. They would usually pause for several minutes before making an answer and will either make some funny noises or try to divert the conversation to something else.

Technologies like the telephone or mobile phone have been abused by cheating and lying spouses or partners in an attempt to deceive their significant other and get away with their infidelity.

You can now make a move and try the methods described above if you suspect your spouse or partner lying over the phone.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Infidelity And Guilt- Watch Out For Signs Of Guilt When Cheating

kajay — Thu, 08 Dec 2011 15:51:48 +0000

One of the surefire ways to end up a marriage or a romantic relationship is infidelity.

This is confirmed by the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy that stated that up to 25% of all relationships ceased to exist because of cheating.

No wonder many consider cheating and infidelity an unforgivable offense.

Even the offending person believes that what he or she did is wrong and has hurt their loved ones, although it can be argued that it is really not their intention, thus creating feelings of guilt and remorse as soon as realization sets in.

However, the outcome of a relationship reeling from an incident of infidelity will depend largely on how the people involved handle their guilt.

Realization on how serious and how selfish their act of infidelity has been is not enough to redeem themselves, but on how they act upon their guilt in an attempt to save their marriage or relationship – or fail to do so and eventually drive the nail and seal the coffin shut.

It is a known fact that many cheaters are really afraid to lose their partners, despite what they have done and how unfaithful they have been, but how they handle their guilt and act upon it will determine the fate of their relationship.

Feelings of Guilt: Differences between the Sexes

In a study presented in the Evolutionary Psychology Journal entitled “Sex Differences in Feelings of Guilt Arising from Infidelity” indicate that there are some differences with regards to guilt between the sexes.

The report state that men have greater feelings of guilt after committing sexual infidelity, while women feel more guilty after getting involved in emotional infidelity.

The results of the study were actually were actually opposite from what the researchers initially hypothesized. Most thought that men will feel guiltier if having been unfaithful to their wives or partners in the physical level would eventually fall in love with the other woman.

Aside from that, many believe that since the sex drive in men are more biological in nature – it was assumed that they won’t feel much guiltier about it. The results show otherwise.

So, feelings of guilt will depend largely on the type of infidelity done and the gender of the guilty party. But why did the results different from what was initially hypothesized.

The reason probably lie in the fact that men see relationships with sex to be weightier than love without sex, while women consider emotional involvement much more important than trying sexual positions with their lovers.

Signs of Guilt

People can learn from the signs and small behavioral details exhibited by their spouses or partners that indicate if there is something wrong and if infidelity has entered their relationships.

In a similar manner, signs of guilt arising from committing acts of infidelity can also manifest in various ways, many of which are visible enough for even unsuspecting partners to detect.

The following groups these signs and manifestations based on the nature of the action manifested by the guilty party. If you feel that something is amiss and your suspected partner has manifested little in other traditional signs of infidelity, then these signs of guilt can be the signs that you should be looking out for.

Basically, these signs can be generally categorized into a positive guilty behavior, where the guilty party tries to perform good things a little more than the usual, or they can manifest the opposite and show negative guilty behaviors – sort of pushing you further out of the way.

* Positive Manifestation

Giving You More Attention than Usual – a spouse or a partner may suddenly shower you with all the attention that you can get and would perform extra effort in spending more time with you on dinners, dates or simply spending time talking with you. This may be a sign of guilt for infidelity and is trying to manifest being the perfect spouse or partner to compensate

Showers You with Gifts – For no apparent reason or occasion, a guilty spouse or partner will try to compensate for his or her guilt by giving you gifts, and expensive ones at that. This may be a way for him or her to relieve themselves of the guilt they are feeling – most probably from giving the same gifts to their lovers or love interest beforehand!

Increased Sexual Attention – A change in your sexual activities, this time initiated by your spouse or partner, may be a clear indication that he or she is guilty for having an affair. Take notice of how they make the extra effort to give you pleasure and sexual favors, or how they want to try on new positions. It is an indication of how sexually adventurous they might have been and are trying to compensate for the guilt they feel for sleeping with another person

* Negative Manifestation

Accusations – Oftentimes a person guilty of something, in this case committing acts of infidelity against their spouses or partners, will try to lift the blame off from their hands and accuse their partners of the same crimes. He or she knows that they are in the wrong but are trying to convince themselves that you have also done the same thing. He or she may accuse you of doing something unfaithful with your co-workers or lash out at you for your online activities

Defensiveness – A guilty person from infidelity will also become defensive even on the little aspects or things that they do. A small remark or comment from you will trigger agitation and vehement defensiveness which will make it seem that you are accusing him or her of something that they did not do – when you have no intent or even unaware of doing so. In their guilty minds, they think that you know something and is already pointing an accusing finger at them

Emotional and Physical Distance – a spouse or a partner who is reeling from the effects of guilt from their unfaithfulness will try to distance themselves away from you physically or emotionally. They would keep to themselves and will try to avoid having long conversations with them – thinking that by doing so they may reveal through their words what they have done and are trying hard to hide from you. They become secretive in what they do and would become agitated if you try to question why.

Guilt is a sign that the person who did the wrongdoing, in this case acts of unfaithfulness and infidelity, know deep inside that what they did was wrong and that their conscience shouts out from within telling them to reveal the truth or act upon it.

His or her response to this inner call will determine the fate of your relationship: whether he or she would like to make amends and save your relationship, or have given up and is now ready to move on and end this chapter in your lives – and start a new one with another.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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How Cheating Happens In The Workplace

kajay — Thu, 08 Dec 2011 04:05:44 +0000

There is a need for everyone to work or earn a living on a daily basis and many even spend most of their waking hours in the office, at work or in their businesses.

People tend to interact much more often with co-workers, bosses and clients that with their spouses or partners paving the way for infidelity in the workplace to take place.

In the old days, infidelity in the office was not as prevalent as it is in modern times as there were still distinct separations as to what jobs a male or female employee may have.

Now, the walls that divide the sexes in the workplace has literally disintegrated and everyone now has more instances where they interact with another co-worker from the opposite sex – and that’s where infidelity problems begin.

A high 60% rate of men involved in extramarital affairs revealed in a recent survey that their involvement in an affair started with someone they met at work.

This is backed by numbers reported by Playboy magazine, stating that a high 3 out of 4 men and 2 out of 3 women have sexual thoughts about someone from work.

More than 80% admit they flirt with the opposite sex of a regular basis while over 65% of women and 75% of men from the survey admitted they had sex with someone they work with.

These statistics are clear indications that infidelity in the workplace has grown more prevalent, now more so as men and women spend most of their energy and focus in the workplace than in any other place in their lives.

Many have lost their sense of balance, in putting equal energy for their spouses or partners in a level similar to what they accord their work – and through the cracks in this imbalance will the seeds of infidelity creep in.

How Does Infidelity in the Workplace Begin?

Lump men and women together in one workplace, let them spend hours upon hours working together and interacting with each other, and you’ll bound to find one, two or more engaging in acts of infidelity – whether they be emotional or physical.

People of opposite sexes bunched together will definitely have the seeds of romance blossoming at one time or another, even if such were forbidden seeds.

There are however, several ways on how the seeds of infidelity can blossom in the workplace and some are described below:

More One-on-One Time with Co-Workers – Working men and women spend more one-on-one time with their co-workers than they do with their spouses or partners. Sooner or later, these co-workers from opposite sexes develop a sort of spouse-like relationship that would eventually blossom into something deeper and more emotional

At Their Best during Working Hours – At home, men and women really don’t mind what they wear, or how food crumbs scatter all around them while lounging on the sofa and watching TV. In the office, not only do working men and women look their best, but they also project their best speech patterns and manners – all of which can definitely attract the opposite sex.

Talk More Openly with their Co-Workers – Working men and women usually develop a special bond with their co-workers who they spend most of the time with. As their friendship grows, they become more open to each other and talk about things that they no longer talk about with their spouses or partners. The more they do so, the more intimate they can become and infidelity follows almost naturally

Closeness from Stress – People collaborating on a stressful project at work spend hours working closely together developing a bond of friendship and intimacy that is usually accorded to a spouse or partner. After the project is completed, they each have a sense of satisfaction that would further solidify this bond – and push it over the edge and to the next level

Satisfy their Sense of Adventure – It is normal for working men and women to loosen up and unwind after a stressful day at work. During these happy hours, inhibitions sometimes fly out the window and working people give in to their sense of adventure in an attempt to spice up their boring life and daily humdrum – and engaging in acts on infidelity usually stand out in their list of options

Business Travel – Working men and women are sometimes sent in pairs to attend a business meeting or convention at a location far from the reach of their spouses or partners and far from the prying eyes of people they mutually know. Such scenario is simply an incubator for infidelity to hatch that sooner or later it would be bound to happen

Types of Workplace Affairs

To provide a better understanding of infidelity in the workplace, the following describes some of the more common types of workplace affairs that a cheating spouse or partner would most likely take or get involved in.

Peer-to-Peer Relationships – Having an affair with a co-worker within the same office or work level is one of the most common infidelity scenarios in the workplace. This usually occurs among working men and women who interact or collaborate work with one another. Some of the more adventurous would even go beyond the confines of their office spaces and get involved with someone from a different office or department

Boss-Employee Relationships – An affair between a boss and his or her secretary or employee is another common infidelity scenario. This usually stems from admiration which they soon manifest physically and blossom into a full blown affair. Sometimes, the relationship is born out of deceit, or returns to special favors accorded by the boss to the employee

Short-Term Relationships – In such affairs, the people involved usually don’t have any emotional commitment or intimacy – they’re just in it for the sex. Many working men and women complain of not getting their physical and sexual needs at home and would soon seek these out elsewhere, and the workplace would be the first location they would look to.

Infidelity in the workplace is rampant and prevalent but such affairs can be avoided if the married couple or partners each do their own share, maintain the same intimacy that they had when they first got together, nurture and supply each of their physical and emotional needs.

Without this support mechanism, working men and women are vulnerable to infidelity in the workplace.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Do Men Cheat For Different Reasons Than Women?

kajay — Wed, 07 Dec 2011 01:38:57 +0000

Unless you’re from the flatworm specie Diplozoon paradoxum that clings and fuses to its partner until death, everyone is susceptible to infidelity.

The level of infidelity cases now may not be the same as decades past, where over 70% of men and 80% of women in the United States believe that cheating on your spouse is entirely and has always been wrong, but infidelity has already occurred back in the old days nonetheless.

So why do people cheat in their marriages or relationships?

Why does infidelity occur when people genuinely does not like the prospect of cheating on their loved ones?

As men and women have physiological and genetic differences between them, the reasons why men cheat are somewhat different from that of women.

Despite these differences, there are also certain similarities behind these reasons. Partners undergoing these phase in their lives should understand the underlying reasons as to why infidelity occurs – and take action to prevent this permanent riff in their marriage or relationship.

Reasons why Men Cheat

It is the common belief that men commit infidelity just to satisfy their sexual cravings while women cheat for romance and companionship.

While such statements are true to some extent, there are other reasons why men cheat – and you’d be surprised to know how complex these reasons can get.

For Sex – Men have the natural urgings to seek out experimentations on sex and are in most cases excited to experience new sex and the adrenalin rush such adventures can bring them. Such experience can be intoxicating and too often many would want to prolong, or repeat, this experience whenever and wherever they can

For Power – Some men want to maintain power in their marriages or relationships and such powers erode as they grow more intimate with their significant other. To maintain or bring back that level of power in their relationships, they try to avoid real intimacy and commit infidelity in order to do so

For Youth – As men age many fear the inevitable and would try to compensate or deny that they are not young as they used to be by getting involved in an illicit affair. For them, having an affair with someone young and fresh gives them back their youth and vitality

To Satisfy Genetic Urgings – Some biologists believe that it is in man’s genetic make-up to commit infidelity as they supposed to have the natural instinct to seek out more mates and spread their genetic seed

Effect on Their Environment – The tendency to commit infidelity may be a result of the environment they grew up with, repeating the behavior of significant people in their past such as a cheating or unfaithful parent or guardian

To Escape an Unhappy Marriage – Sex is not the only thing that drives men to commit infidelity. If they are unhappy with their marriage or relationship: whether it is ridden with conflict and misunderstanding, or their relationship has evolved into something that lacks honesty and communication – men would often seek a way out or escape by engaging in a short-term or worse, a long-term affair

Reasons why Women Cheat

Women cheat for different reasons and the reasons can be as complicated as what women can become. In the olden days, a cheating wife or a cheating girlfriend is not a common occurrence.

But as the times evolve, women are now more empowered to do things that men does – including committing acts of infidelity against their spouses or partners. The following describes some of these reasons:

Women are Open to Many Channels for Infidelity – Unlike the olden days where women are confined to homes or limited other destinations, modern women now have the same opportunities as men and can freely go wherever they want to. They can go to social events, business trips, or spend 80 workaholic hours a week at the office. This is made even more complicated with the advent and popularity of the internet and social media – more channels to meet and interact with other people from the opposite sex

Seek Out Prince Charming – Women who commit infidelity complain that their husbands or partners stopped treating them as their princesses. Despite the many opportunities available to them, women still crave for that fairy tale moment and live happily ever after – and would seek that from someone else if their significant other fails to do so

To Seek Excitement – Some women with good husbands and a relatively normal family life find themselves committing infidelity to perk up and bring back excitement in their lives. Her flirting does not work on her husband or partner anymore, who have settled down to a normal and stable life, so they would bring their flirting out to someone else who would appreciate what they do even more

To Find Someone to Talk to – Many men often forget, and neglect, that women need to talk and ideal bonding times for them is spend activities with their husbands and partners while engaging in heart to heart talk. The “talk” in their relationships have digressed to something mechanical: bills, savings, mortgage, old arguments – that they would seek someone else who would listen and be interested in what they would like to say

To Seek a Boost of Confidence – Many wives and female partners feel that they are being neglected in their relationships, that they are not on top of their husband’s or partner’s pedestal anymore. They tend to seek affirmation from someone else who would treat them and make them feel what it means to be special once more

To Get Revenge – Some women who committed infidelity have done so as way of getting back at their husband or partner who cheated on her beforehand. It’s an eye-for-an-eye and a tooth-for-a-tooth thing and the main fact that they have been cheated upon gives them the right to seek revenge and commit the same acts themselves

Big Differences… Great Similarities

There are many reasons why men cheat and most are different from the reasons why women cheat or commit infidelity.

But one thing is certain… one thing is quite similar among these reasons… and that is men or women are not satisfied or happy with their current relationships that they seek joy and happiness from someone else.

Couples who are keen on keeping their relationships and avoid infidelity to creep into their lives should realize these reasons and make concrete steps to address these issues before they blow out of proportion and someone commits infidelity.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Business Travel And Infidelity- Is Your Spouse Cheating On You?

kajay — Tue, 06 Dec 2011 16:04:04 +0000

A report from Eagle Investigative Services indicate that up to 42% of women whose spouse or partner go on business trips to out of town destinations suspect that their significant other are cheating on them while away.

One can’t blame them though for having such suspicions, as business travel provides a wide window of opportunity for a cheating spouse or partner to commit infidelity.

There is even a theory developed before called The 50-mile Rule which state that a spouse or a partner will more likely cheat on their significant other is they’re away from them for 50 miles or more.

Whether this theory is substantiated or not, it just shows how vulnerable travelling people are to infidelity, particularly travelling alone on a business trip to a location so far away that it is virtually impossible for the his or her significant other to monitor.

This is confirmed by a report from USA Today, noting the high infidelity rate among business travelers they have interviewed regarding involvement in extramarital affairs.

Whether the business trip is real or just a ploy by a cheating partner to gain a free hand with his or her escapades, the fact that they are totally free from their partner’s direct scrutiny or in a location that is far from sight of friends and acquaintances gives them the chance they need to commit infidelity.

Travel Scenarios that are Magnets for Infidelity

The following are real business travel scenarios that would put a spouse or partner in a position to commit infidelity, whether intentional or not.

Whether business travel is a regular work scenario or just a one-time thing, each travel scenario is unique but is similar in the fact that the suspected spouse or partner is travelling alone or with a companion – but not with their significant other.

*Traveling with a Co-Worker

Latest statistics from infidelity experts reveal that the workplace is the number 1 place where people commit infidelity.

The first seeds of an affair often begin at work: with a co-worker, boss or client – that would soon blow out of proportion once they’re out and alone together on a business trip.

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An all expense paid trip to a usually wonderful location far, far away from their spouses or partners presents a perfect scenario to commit infidelity.

Too often, co-workers who work together on a daily basis, spend most of their waking hours at the office, and better relate to one-another than their spouse or partner, have hidden emotions towards each other that they could not express among other co-workers.

In a business trip that involves these two co-workers, the reigns holding their emotions back will totally disappear and there will be nothing left to stand between them an infidelity.

*The Out-of-Town Business Convention

A spouse or a partner sent to a business convention will often find themselves in a place so wonderful that they would more often than not forget about domestic concerns and other issues back home or at the office.

In this relaxed state, the spouse or partner would meet other interesting people under the same frame of mind. One situation would lead to another and they would eventually find themselves committing infidelity.

*Travelling with the Boss

This is similar to travelling with a co-worker, but this time one person is the subordinate or the superior to the other at work.

In many cases, it involves a boss and his secretary and in travelling together they would find themselves in a situation where they are alone with each other, getting more comfortable with one another, until the boss-employee boundaries shatter and they find themselves entering a relationship that would betray their spouse or partner.

It may start with an emotional attachment during the course of their boss-employee relationship that may evolve into romance – triggered during their business trip.

*Travelling Alone

Business trips can be a regular thing and a part of the spouse or a partner’s job description, such as maintaining accounts in a different state or direct interaction with a branch office or subsidiary.

In such trips, the travelling partner or spouse is subjected to a whole barrage of temptations: from stripers and call girls, to someone they met at a bar or at another office in that location.

A spouse or partner would be vulnerable in such situations and would often succumb to the temptation knowing that their spouse or partner is miles away for them to get caught.

Business Travel Tactics Cheating Partners Use

The situations described earlier are scenarios that could lead one to commit infidelity. However, a cheating spouse or partner can also deliberately use business travel tactics to cheat on their partners and be with someone else during these trips.

*The Fake Business Trip

A cheating spouse or partner could cleverly invent a business trip, fooling both their partners and the company that they’re working for, in order to spend days of vacationing with their secret lovers.

A person usually sent on business trips on a regular basis can use this tactic to cheat on their spouses or partners – unless their significant others somehow got in touch with people at their partners’ work and find discrepancies with their supposed “business trips”

*The Extended Business Trip

Another tactic often used by a cheating spouse or partner is when they intentionally extend the number of days into their legitimate business trip and spend this extra time with their lovers or spend a few days in a short fling with one of the locals.

*The Fake Hotel Booking

A cheating spouse or partner who often goes on a regular business trip to a specific location may maintain an affair in that location and would often spend time with their lovers during these business trips.

One way they can do this is to fake his hotel booking and spend the nights while he or she is away in their lover’s home.

*Business Trip – But Not Alone

It is not uncommon for business people to bring along their spouses or partners on business trips.

A change from this pattern may be subject for suspicion of infidelity, particularly if the suspected partner does not bring their significant other along with them anymore, or if they insist on travelling to the airport and back alone.

There is a thin wall between business travel and infidelity and many have easily breached this wall and succumb to the temptations of the flesh or their emotions, engaging in a physical or emotional relationship with another.

Understanding the reasons and knowing the signs of infidelity that goes with business travel can prime you up to what your next steps should be.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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How To Tell If Someone Is Lying Through Their Eyes

kajay — Mon, 05 Dec 2011 04:17:59 +0000

One of the most intrinsic elements that are very apparent from someone committing infidelity is deception. A spouse or a partner guilty of infidelity can only get away with what they’re doing through cheating and lying.

According to a research conducted by author George Miller in his book The Magical Number Seven, an average normal person only has the capability of processing 7 bits of information at any single time – which is definitely not enough to understand or comprehend the more than 75-100 verbal and nonverbal suggestions emanating from each person every second.

Such statistics will tell us that people can easily be deceived and more so if deception is actually the intent of the person they are interacting with such as a cheating and lying spouse or partner guilty of infidelity.

It will really make one wonder how he or she will be able to detect if their spouse or partner is lying when confronted with the infidelity issue.

There are however certain ways on how you can detect if another person is lying or not and this is through understanding the pattern of movement of their eyes when asked with a specific question.

The principles behind this method have been designed by psychologists as well as top government investigating agencies such as the FBI and the CIA.

It may sound like some fantasized, cloak and dagger stuff people only see in the movies but there is indeed a science behind these methods.

What’s more important is that investigative authorities have actually used these methods to catch the lying and deceiving bad guys at their game – and you can use these very same methods in catching a lying and cheating spouse or partner.

The Science behind Detecting Truth through the Eyes

The practice of decoding facial expressions has been developed as part of the science in Behavior Analysis way back in the sixties by Paul Ekman, a renowned psychologist who organized the distinct muscular movements that a typical person can make with his face and created language syntax out of it.

He identified 46 distinct movements that if combined and used in conjunction with each other can produce up to 7000 different facial expressions.

From these methods that Ekman developed, the FBI and the CIA was able to detect micro-expressions from a person’s facial and eye movements to detect deceit during interrogations.

These movements and expressions are not under conscious control, and the rate of consistency is high that investigators produced amazing results with their use.

For people wanting to know if a person is lying or not need understand all these expressions but can look at eye movements to detect signs of honesty.

Detecting truth or deceit behind eye movements stems from the understanding of the Science of the Brain, which is basically based on the fact that each person has two distinct sides of his or her brain: the right side which is used more when constructing visual images, imagination, and free thinking; and the left side of the brain which is used visual and audio recall of known memory or something that they have actually seen, heard, or experienced.

When a person is using the right side of the brain in conversation, he or she may actually be trying to create and answer or visualize a “memory” that did not necessarily take place and may have been imagined.

If using the left brain, they are actually recalling something that actually happened and logged inside their brain.

This pattern is typical for right-handed people, and it should be noted that for left-handed people, the pattern is reversed.

This is the principle used for detecting truth and lies with a person’s eye movements – the same principle you can use if our spouse or partner is cheating on you or not.

Detecting Lies through Eye Movement

The following describes eye movements that a person makes while in conversation. The way the eyes move while they explain or describe something can indicate if what they are saying is truthful or not.

Upward Movements

Upward movements are associated with visuals.

When the eyes are looking upward and to the left, the person speaking is visually remembering an image from the recollection of an actual memory – something that they have actually seen, touched or experienced.

If the eye movements are pointing upwards and to the right, it may be an indication that the person is visually constructing an image or trying to imagine a thing or situation that may not have actually taken place.

Sideward Movements

Sideward movements are associated with sounds, thus eyes are rolling towards the direction of the ears.

A movement to the left indicate that they are trying to recall a sound or audio from memory and have actually heard what is being described verbally.

If the direction of the eye movement is to the right, the person may be trying to imagine or construct the sound or audio in their brain, but not necessarily from experience

Downward Movements

Downward movements are associated with emotions or sensory impressions. Eye movements pointing downwards and to the left indicate that they are recalling actual emotional memory of an event they have actually experienced.

If the movement is downward and to the right, the person may be constructing an emotional memory that may not have actually taken place and is trying to imagine what that particular emotion actually feels like

Using this Information in Detecting Infidelity

To use the principles of eye movements described above to determine if a person is lying or not, one must actually know the person he or she is speaking with much more intimately or have several interactions with the person.

Knowing the person gives you an insight of their normal patterns of behavior and eye movements which can help you determine if the person is trying to imagine something or recalling thoughts from actual memory.

When using these methods, it should also be important to be careful and not reveal what you are trying to do so that eye movements are expressed without conscious thought and give you misleading results.

Finally, detecting lies or deceit through eye movements should not be used as your primary evidence, so to speak, but only a guide to put you in the right direction.

You can use the insights you gain here if you want to pursue something more concrete in your quest to catch infidelity – or was actually just imagining things yourself.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Recon Low Light B&W Hidden Camera DVR Clock Review

kajay — Fri, 02 Dec 2011 17:03:13 +0000

Add another pint of security to your establishment using the Recon Low Light B&W Hidden Camera DVR Clock that has specifications that would surely fulfill what you desire when it comes to your security system.

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The Recon Low Light B& W Hidden Camera DVR Clock is a special security camera that looks like an ordinary clock but provides the security that is more than what you can perceive.

With its amazing appearance, no one would easily notice that the device is recording whatever happens in the vicinity of a particular establishment.

This would surely prevent people who has bad intentions and has the possibility to resort on breaking any device that would mar their acts.

Another commendable property of this security camera is its capacity to capture high definition images no matter how much light is present.

This means that you would be able to see each and every detail that you might need and it would allow you to identify even tin least obvious part of that thing that might lead you to jeopardy.

Its capacity to store videos is also plausible. The device is compatible with any removable SD card that can range on up to 16 GB. This means that the device could record a coverage that would last for days.

This is really essential since a high capacity storage device would mean less time for maintenance and experience that comes with ease and convenience.

What is even better about this device is that you could easily transfer the files that might have had filled up the SD card to any computer that uses the USB technology so you don’t have to worry about the exhausting file management.

Another feature of the Recon Low Light B&W Hidden Camera DVR Clock that you would surely love is its capability to be played when connected on a television or a computer.

When waiting to connect it on a TV, all you need is a jack or a cable that would connect the camera to the TV and this jack would be the one to send the signals to the TV.

Connecting it on a computer is even easier. All you have to do is to use the microSD card of the camera and plug it into the computer.

Some computer might require you to have a removable card reader while some have it pre-installed into the system so you don’t have to determine what the capacity of your computer is before using it.

After the memory card has been connected to a computer using any of these modes, the computer will then read it as a removable disk. This space is where you can find the stored videos and where you can directly play those using a compatible media player.

When bought, the usual components that are included in the box where this hidden camera is placed includes the unit itself, a video cable, a booklet that contains the instructions for using the device, a 2 GB SD card, a USB SD card reader, a remote control, and a USB Extension cable for the card reader.

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Recon Air Filter Hidden Camera with Recording (DVR) Review

kajay — Fri, 02 Dec 2011 17:01:16 +0000

Make sure that your security system is reliable enough by buying a security camera that can provide the most ideal features that can fulfill almost every desire that a person has when it comes to their security system.

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One kind of security camera that you might consider is the Recon Air Filter Hidden Camera with Recording (DVR) if ever you are thinking of buying a security camera that would protect you while allowing you to experience the ease and convenience of using it.

The Recon Air Filter Hidden Camera with Recording (DVR) is a specially designed security camera that looks like an ordinary air filter but possesses features that would blow the mind of any person who is after a reliable security system.

The device was made in such a way that it would not appear that obvious and that it would remain unnoticed by any person who may put the owner into jeopardy.

This way, the camera will also be allowed to document each and every moment in a particular establishment freely and the uses will be able to use it for further purposes.

Another interesting ability of this camera is its capacity to record MP4 videos with highly commendable qualities. The camera records each and every minute of a certain establishment at a rate of 30 frames per second.

This means that the videos that would be recorded are clear enough to allow any person to comprehend whatever event is happening throughout the duration of a particular shot.

What is more pleasing it that you can also have an option to record the videos with its natural color so you will be able to define and identify the most essential details that would not have been caught by an average recording device.

The device also lets you to experience quality shots during a time when ordinary cameras have succumb, the night.

With its night vision feature, the camera will be able to record videos even if it is taken in locations that do not have an ample amount of light. This simply means that the security does not end up during the period when you almost thought that nothing significant would really happen.

Aside from recording videos, the camera has also the capacity to take snapshots that could suffice into your most special needs.

These snapshots are recorded in a very intelligible quality that it would even allow you to see the details that no average video camera can capture.

The snapshots can also be used in lieu of a video if ever there has no enough disk space inside the device.

The capacity of the Recon Air Filter Hidden Camera with Recording (DVR) to store and manage data is also another thing that you would surely adore about the device.

The device comes with a 2GB SD case that has the capacity to store lengthy videos and what is even better is that this capacity can be easily upgraded by replacing it with a more effective SD card that can get as high as 8GB.

Aside from this amazing storage, you can also easily manage and view the data that has been gathered using the camera. This is possible because of the USB technology that the device uses and the device’s capability to be connected into a television.

The Recon Air Filter is a truly amazing device that deserves to be reviewed and tried. However, the final say on whether it is worthy to buy this device or not is still into you.

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HD Deceptive Motion Sensor™: Hidden Camera PIR Review

kajay — Fri, 02 Dec 2011 16:59:07 +0000

Make sure that every establishment that you own is secured using the HD Deceptive Motion Sensor™: Hidden Camera PIR.

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This amazingly designed hidden camera will let you know everything that you might need with its features that is more than what you will see in an average hidden camera.

The HD Deceptive Motion Sensor™: Hidden Camera PIR has the capability to record anything that you might miss while looking over your establishment at 720 HD Video, 24/7 Day or Night so you don’t have to worry about anything that you might miss if things go wrong.

This simply means that your establishment would simply be able to acquire a virtual guard that would provide security in your house even during the times when you are sleeping or too busy that you are not able to notice every crucial detail that you would have had missed.

What is even better is that all of the videos that will be recorded by this hidden camera are made with a quality that will let you see each detail that you would need.

The appearance and physical characteristic of the HD Deceptive Motion Sensor™: Hidden Camera PIR is even more commendable.

It was made with materials that are durable enough to resist any force that could cause its damage so you don’t need to mind whether your camera would make it that long or not.

Also, the camera itself was designed in a manner that it would look like an ordinary occupancy sensor so no one would notice that you are actually documenting whatever they are doing inside your establishment.

This is a perfect feature because you will be able to get rid of the worries that would cause any possible destructive action that will be made by any person who has a bad intention.

Data storage and management is not a problem with this hidden camera because it offers data storage and management related features that is truly plausible.

The camera allows you to store a thee that is as big as 32 GB through a microSD card that you would opt to install in the camera.

Additionally, this hidden camera comes with the USB technology that would allow you to easily transfer the files to your computer.

The only problem that you might encounter when it comes to this portion of the camera is that it does not usually come with a pre-installed microSD so you would have to buy it yourself.

This hidden camera also comes with other innovative features that would surely realize your desires for a hidden camera technology.

These features include the IR Night Vision and Body Heat Recording. The IR Might Vision would allow the camera to record even during the night when there is inconsiderable amount of light while the Body Heat Recording mode allows the camera whenever there is someone that is inside your establishment.

With these things, the HD Deceptive Hidden Camera is really a must-consider when you are trying to buy a gadget that would provide not only security but also convenience.

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Body Heat Activated Wall Clock Hidden Camera Review

kajay — Fri, 02 Dec 2011 16:56:46 +0000

Upgrade your security system and make it more reliable using the Body Heat Activated Wall Clock Hidden Camera.

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It is just another addition to today’s most advance security cameras that provides incomparable convenience, ease and satisfaction.

With the plausible features of this camera, this Body Heat Activated Hidden Camera should be considered when planning to buy one.

Aside from it actual appearance which makes it less noticeable than the average hidden camera, the overall physical properties of this hidden camera block is also powerful and highly commendable.

Each part of the device was made with the materials that make it resistant to almost any kind of force that could have destroyed it. These same materials also allow the device to last longer compare to an average security camera.

Another characteristic of the Body Heat Activated Wall Clock Hidden Camera that is quite amazing is its powerful battery life. Its standby battery, which is made up of compact electricity source, allows the device to work constantly within a year.

This means that you don’t have to worry about the same things that one would normally encounter when using an average camera with a mediocre power source such as a frequent and costly need to change the batteries and inconsiderable data lost due to abrupt and unexpected power loss.

This also means that you need to maintain the camera less frequently and you can enjoy the time that would have been spent on fixing it.

Its capacity to capture images at a very considerable quality is also another factor that makes it truly plausible. The camera can capture any important details that a normal security camera might have had missed.

This capacity allows you to witness things that might become really essential to you if you would ever need it.

It is also impossible for the Body Heat Activated Wall Clock Hidden Camera to become last on your list when it comes to the most reliable security cameras in data storage and management.

The camera works with a portable microSD card that would allow you to store files in a more convenient way due to its portability.

The device is also compatible with the USB technology which allows you to note every data that the camera has gathered in any computer as long as the computer uses the same technology.

Lastly, the best feature that this device offer is its capacity to detect body heat and automatically record a video whenever it detects a change in temperature within a 30-40 feet range.

This means that you can opt to set the camera and let it play during only the time when it is actually needed. This will eventually allow you to save energy, disk space, and effort.

The same thing would also save you from reviewing the parts of the days when nothing significant really happened.

Basically, the device comes with a 4 GB SDcard, remove control, charger, Instruction Book and remote control when bought as a unit and the price may range for $500.00-$600.00.

CLICK HERE FOR BODY HEAT ACTIVATED WALL CLOCK HIDDEN CAMERA

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Air Purifier HD Color Camera with Recording (DVR) Review

kajay — Fri, 02 Dec 2011 16:55:14 +0000

To people who have always wanted security, having a reliable security camera that would contribute to their ever wanted ideal security system is truly fulfilling.

CLICK HERE FOR AIR PURIFIER HD COLOR CAMERA

One camera that might satisfy this kind of fulfillment is the Air Purifier HD Color Camera with Recording (DVR) that has a lot of features that you would surely love.

As what it names suggests the Air Purifier HD Color Camera with Recording (DVR) looks like an average air purifier and no one would notice that it is actually a camera.

This appearance lets the device shoot videos without letting anybody know for no one would suspect that it is a camera. This is essential especially for people who wanted to stay secured but is worrying that a camera might not be effective for anyone could easily destroy it.

Other physical characteristics of this hidden camera that are truly commendable are its lightweightness and its durability. This security camera weighs less than a kilogram and this lightness yields portability and convenience.

Also, the camera is made with materials that allow it to last long and that can resist any force that could cause its immediate destruction.

The camera also allows you to store videos with qualities that would surely meet your standards. Even though the device doesn’t really looks like a camera, it would work as if it is one of the most ideal image capturing devices around.

Also, the camera captures images that are clear enough to see the most important details that you want your camera to capture. Aside from these, another impressive function of this camera is its out-of-the-usual security camera capability to capture colored image.

This means that you are really getting the images that you would surely need.

Another innovative feature of the camera is its ability to automatically switch from the normal mode to the night mode depending on what is the current time.

This is very crucial since ordinary cameras don’t have the ability to capture images at night the time when security is expected to become firmer and more powerful.

The capacity of Air Purifier HD Color Camera with Recording (DVR) to hold data and to transmit these data is also commendable.

The camera usually comes with a 2GB SD card that would allow you to store data easier compared to ordinary data storing devices. What is even more impressive is that this external memory can also be expanded to up to 32 GB by replacing it with an SD card that has that particular capacity.

Aside from its wonderful storage capacity, the convenience it gives when transmitting data is also another interesting thing about this device.

All you need is just a cable to view or transmit the videos into any device that is compatible with the USB technology. Even the microSD card can be used in order to transmit data in televisions that have pre-installed card readers.

With these features and specifications, this camera really deserves to be tried. However, in the end, what is really important is your capacity to choose what is really essential.

CLICK HERE FOR AIR PURIFIER HD COLOR CAMERA

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Turbo PIR Motion Sensor DVR Hidden Camera with Recording (DVR) Review

kajay — Fri, 02 Dec 2011 16:52:56 +0000

The Turbo PIR Motion Sensor DVR Hidden Camera with Recording (DVR) is a great piece of quality surveillance equipment for those who want to ensure home or office safety.

CLICK HERE FOR TURBO PIR MOTION SENSOR DVR HIDDEN CAMERA

The product boasts of quality videos and is capable of recording on the spot. Easily hidden and specially built to provide a wide array of features, this particular hidden camera is one of the best in the market today.

Features

- Instantly records video with removable SD camera

- No wires or light, making it easier for the item to be unnoticed.

- Maybe activated through motion or set to record at a specific time.

- Excellent camouflage ability.

- Accommodates two power sources – battery and AC adapter for easy power changes.

- Easy viewing allows for PC or TV connectivity through the SD card.

- Transfer files from one medium to another without a fuss.

- Battery is capable of running the item for 17 hours straight.

Product Advantages

What’s great about the Turbo PIR Motion Sensor DVR Hidden Camera with Recording (DVR) is the fact that it doesn’t have any telltale signs of recording.

A completely covert item, the product is capable of running both ways – through battery or through an AC adapter. Activated by motion sensors, there’s no need to worry about the SD card filling up before something worthy is capture.

Excellent technological features ensure that the item will be up and active the minute something moves within its range.

The hidden camera records using an SD card which can be easily removed and replaced without too much work on the installer’s part.

A 1GB is already included upon purchase although users can go as high as 32GB should they feel it necessary. Dressed up in plain white with no obvious markings, the item can be placed practically anywhere to provide top of the line surveillance for its users.

Incredibly high resolution ensures that users will get the kind of view they want. The resolution itself may be changed depending on the needs of user. A search function is also available, making it easier to pinpoint dates and watch surveillance for that specific day.

Disadvantages

The only problem with the Turbo PIR Motion Sensor DVR Hidden Camera is the fact that it has to be placed in a visible area for it to start recording.

However, the camera is plain enough that people can easily mistake it for a completely different item. The unit is easy to install and functions are easy to understand and use.

Conclusion

All in all, the Turbo PIR Motion Sensor DVR Hidden Camera with Recording (DVR) is a great way to keep track of a room. Its ideal uses include office surveillance, nanny surveillance or even a simple item used in the living room to spot intruders.

Adequately priced, the product performs wonderfully and is the best choice for homeowners who want extra protection within their walls. As mentioned, the unit comes with an AC adaptor jack and operates using 4 AA batteries.

CLICK HERE FOR TURBO PIR MOTION SENSOR DVR HIDDEN CAMERA

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Smoke Detector Hidden Camera with Recording (DVR) Review

kajay — Fri, 02 Dec 2011 16:50:25 +0000

When it comes to safety, nothing is too much and the Smoke Detector Hidden Camera with Recording (DVR) manages to provide the perfect amount of protection to keep owners sleeping peacefully at night.

CLICK HERE FOR SMOKE DETECTOR HIDDEN CAMERA

Disguised as a smoke detector, the camera boasts of excellent features that make it a wonderful item to have around the house.

Features of the Smoke Detector Hidden Camera

- Smoke detector body provides excellent camouflage.

- Automatically records vides to removable SD card.

- Perfect for high traffic locations.

- Easily copy videos and store them in a safer location.

- Detects motions before recording.

- Equipped with Sony Color CCD Imaging sensor for clearer and sharper captures.

- Capable of capturing quality videos even with insufficient lighting.

Advantages

The fact that the product looks like a smoke detector makes it unthreatening to the casual observer. This means that the item can be placed practically anywhere – the living room, the kitchen or even the dining room – without it being questioned.

After all, why would anyone protest to a smoke detector when it provides excellent protection against fire? The size of the camera is also incredibly small, just a pinhole which is therefore hard to detect.

When viewed from below, the pinhole is practically non-existent and even if seen, is not easily recognizable as part of a camera.

What’s great about this particular product though is the fact that the camera is capable of capturing high quality videos. It has been specially made to provide detailed videos which can be instantly saved on a removable SD card.

The card can then be taken and stored directly on the PC for easy viewing. Since there are lots of SD card sizes today, homeowners will have no trouble placing a large-capacity SD in the slot and not checking it for several days.

The Smoke Detector Hidden Camera is still capable of capturing videos even if with dim lightening. In fact, the videos have a quality that rivals those taken with normal lightening.

This makes the camera a reliable security option even during nighttime, especially since this is when most criminal activities occur.

For those who are worried about the SD card filling up too soon, the Smoke Detector Hidden Camera is not an ongoing recording device.

This means that it only activates once motion is detected. Hence, recording only happens should there is possible threat within a specific area.

Disadvantages

The only disadvantage of the Smoke Detector Hidden Camera with Recording (DVR) is the fact it runs through direct electricity supply. This means that it has to be plugged in an output for it to work.

That being said, homeowners should ensure that the cord is well hidden from view considering how most smoke detectors today run on batteries.

Conclusion

All in all, the Smoke Detector Hidden Camera with Recording (DVR) is an excellent security feature that eases the burden of most homeowners.

Keep in mind though that the product only looks like a smoke detector and is not capable of functioning as one. As a hidden camera though, the product performs wonderfully and provides the best images possible for maximum security.

CLICK HERE FOR SMOKE DETECTOR HIDDEN CAMERA

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“Plug” & Play: AC Adapter Hidden Camera Review

kajay — Fri, 02 Dec 2011 16:47:03 +0000

“Plug” & Play: AC Adapter Hidden Camera is a great take on home surveillance with a camera carefully hidden inside an AC Adapter.

CLICK HERE FOR AC ADAPTER HIDDEN CAMERA

Easily hidden in practically any home, the camera is directly plugged into a socket to operate while providing an excellent recording of everything within the camera’s viewpoint.

Product Features

- Cleverly made to look like an AC Adapter for easier blending in a home.

- Motion activated camera immediately records after sensing threat.

- Camera comes with an overwriting feature.

- Incredibly small camera hole makes the AC Adapter Hidden Camera completely untraceable

- Makes use of an SD card for built in recording.

- Utilization of SD card makes it easy to save and transfer files from the camera to a computer.

Advantages of the “Plug” & Play: AC Adapter Hidden Camera

This particular hidden camera is definitely ahead of its peers due to how easy it is to disguise. With most hidden cameras necessitating a power outlet in order to work, the AC adapter disguise provides the perfect excuse to have it plugged in without looking suspicious for the average person.

Capable of providing high quality videos, the Plug and Play unit provides as much as 720×480 resolution with 30fps. The SD card originally starts at 4GB but can support as much as 32GB.

For those wondering, each GB is capable of storing up to one hour of video surveillance. However, this is not a continuous video recording but is triggered by motion within the covered area of the camera.

Hence, a 32GB SD card could literally take weeks or even months without being filled; making it an excellent choice for most individuals. The product is also capable of overwriting the oldest recordings.

Aside from these technological advantages however, the AC Adapter Hidden Camera is also incredibly durable. Made from the highest quality materials, the item is not only very low key but can be used for years with the proper care.

Disadvantages

The one problem with the AC Adapter Hidden Camera is the fact that it is attached to the wall socket. Since most wall sockets are located near the floor, the view seen might be limited.

However, correctly positioning the item could easily resolve this problem and provide and extensive angle for maximum security.

What the Item is Best For

The AC Adapter Hidden Camera is ideal for various situations that require covert security. It can be used to keep track of children, nannies or even within an office setting.

The product is also adequately priced and therefore can be purchased by anyone who wants to spike up their current security system.

All in all, the “Plug” & Play: AC Adapter Hidden Camera is an excellent choice for surveillance equipment.

The product not only provides excellent videos but is also packed with features that make it efficient but fool proof when it comes to providing protection.

There are actually two version of this product: the Pro and the Standard. Both provide great service for the user and are manufacture beautifully for easy camouflage.

CLICK HERE FOR AC ADAPTER HIDDEN CAMERA

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Internet Ready Tissue Box Hidden Camera with Recording (DVR) Review

kajay — Fri, 02 Dec 2011 16:44:36 +0000

The Internet Ready Tissue Box Hidden Camera with Recording (DVR) is a perfect example of a dual-function unit.

CLICK HERE FOR INTERNET READY TISSUE BOX HIDDEN CAMERA

Cleverly hidden, the camera item is practically invincible in this spy camera product and armed with various features, makes for an excellent surveillance gadget.

The all-black design is also stylish and easily blends in with any home, making it completely obscure from view.

Features

- The video camera boasts of quality resolution of up to 720×480

- Recording and playback can be set as high as 30ftps

- Videos recorded come with a time and date stamp, making it easier for users to pinpoint a specific event.

- The rate for the recording rate may be adjusted depending on the needs of the user.

- Comes with a playback feature.

- Utilizes SD card for recording with memory expandable to as much as 16GB.

- Recording may be scheduled to save on SD card space or set to activate upon detected motion.

- Plug and play feature means that videos do not need conversion before being viewed on the computer.

- Batteries are rechargeable and can record 6 hours non-stop.

- Provides high quality videos even during night time.

- Highly user-friendly with an application menu.

- A/V out is possible.

Advantages

What’s great about the Internet Ready Tissue Box Hidden Camera with Recording (DVR) is the fact that it’s a two-function item that acts as a tissue box while secretly providing security to any home.

The box is colored in black and blends in with the background, making it completely unnoticeable for the casual observer. The recording options also ensure that the user gets exactly what they want in terms of surveillance.

The product may be activated to run on a specific schedule – perhaps on nighttime – while others may set it up to work after sensing motion. This makes the tissue box hidden camera completely effective for whatever setting.

Recorded videos boast of a time stamp and date, ensuring that homeowners would be able to pinpoint surveillance for any day they choose.

The high quality videos complement the accessibility of the unit, making it possible for users to access surveillance within minutes. With SD card capacity running as high as 16GB, users would have no problem monitoring every second.

Disadvantages

The main problem with this product is the fact that there is no AC adaptor for a constant power feed.

However, the rechargeable batteries make it easy to provide a power source for the product without spending too much for the batteries.

Other than that, the tissue box hidden camera makes for a great surveillance item to have around.

Conclusion

All in all, the Internet Ready Tissue Box Hidden Camera with Recording (DVR) provides high quality videos and triggered to work at just the right moment for surveillance to matter.

Attached with an adequate price tag, the model also comes with a remote control, battery charger, 2GB SD card, 2 Li-polymer battery, power supply, SD card reader and user manual.

Suggested uses for the product include nanny surveillance, home/office surveillance and others.

CLICK HERE FOR INTERNET READY TISSUE BOX HIDDEN CAMERA

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Covert Alarm Clock Spy Camera With Built In Recording (DVR) Review

kajay — Fri, 02 Dec 2011 16:42:33 +0000

The Covert Alarm Clock Spy Camera with Built In Recording (DVR) is possibly one of the most effective disguises for a hidden camera.

CLICK HERE FOR COVERT ALARM CLOCK SPY CAMERA

Armed with various features, the product comes with an undetectable camera that manages to record everything within its range. With a stylish design, the model is not only functional but manages to blend in well with any home décor.

Features

- Fully functional alarm clock provides additional function to this spy camera.

- Product comes with a 2GB SD card for automatic recordings; memory may be expanded.

- SD card makes it easy to access recordings and copy them to the personal computer.

- Provides excellent video quality at all times, even with low lighting.

- May be connected to a TV or Monitor for immediate viewing.

- Operates on a MPEG-4 video format.

- The spy camera may be set up to operate on motion, through a schedule or continuous recording.

Advantages

The first thing that attracts individuals with the Covert Alarm Clock Spy Camera with Built In Recording (DVR) is the fact that it is completely functional as an alarm clock.

This makes it completely plausible to have the item in various locations of the house from the living room, the kitchen or the baby’s bedroom.

The camera itself is nearly invisible thanks to the dark coloring of the product. The analog clock design itself is beautiful and makes for an additional home decoration without being obvious of its real purpose.

The spy camera can be set up to run on schedule or through a motion sensor. This ensures that the battery wouldn’t run out too soon or the SD card filled up in a matter of days.

Those who intend using the camera for the office would find the TV and monitor link option plausible. The item also saves on an MPEG-4 video format which means that it can be easily read on the PC with no need for any conversion.

The high quality of the videos is also an excellent selling point, providing viewers with a clear and sharp image of every movement. This is still true even when the area has low lighting.

Disadvantages

The main problem for this unit is that unlike other spy cameras, the unit cannot operate using a direct power link. This means that users would need to ensure that their batteries are fresh all the time to get perfect surveillance for their homes.

However, this can be easily remedied since the analog clock could provide a hint to users about the item’s battery status. Fortunately, the product is capable of running for a long time through battery.

Conclusion

All in all, the Covert Alarm Clock Spy Camera with Built In Recording (DVR) is definitely a good choice as a spy camera, especially for individuals who want their surveillance made as inconspicuous as possible.

The product is ideal for home office surveillance, professional office security or as a nanny camera. Durable and easy to use, the alarm clock-come-spy camera can be placed practically anywhere.

CLICK HERE FOR COVERT ALARM CLOCK SPY CAMERA

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Stealth iBot Computer Spy Review

kajay — Fri, 02 Dec 2011 16:39:57 +0000

Internet made it possible to make a tremendous amount of information available for all people. Just by surfing the internet, any question has an available answer.

CLICK HERE FOR STEALTH IBOT

There are even instances where all research is being done on the internet already as it gives more convenience and comfort to the user. However, with the internet’s limitless access, there is no restriction as to what site a person cannot go.

Everything is possible regardless of age. The person is allowed to go to any website he wants. This poses a big problem to parents nowadays. Internet can be a great source of influence to their growing children.

And they do not know how they can ensure that their children are only using the computer for educational purposes.

This is indeed a big problem for parents. This is something serious that needs to be dealt with. Of course, no parent will want their children to be negatively influenced by what is on the virtual world.

Parents will want to raise their children to be responsible citizens as much as possible. One way for this to be possible is being able to monitor their children in every activity they do even when they are at home using the computer.

One product technology innovation that can help is Stealth iBot Computer Spy. This is a computer program in a flash drive that can record all the activities done in the computer.

The installation process is just simple. The person just needs to run the program from the flash drive by inserting it into the computer.

Once done with the installation, the drive can be safely removed. When there is a need to get the data generated by the program, the person just needs to reinsert the flash drive to the computer.

Indeed, Stealth iBot Computer Spy can be very useful if the purpose is on monitoring the children’s activity while surfing the Internet.

However, if it will be used for other purpose like spying on a friend, a colleague or a co-worker, the device will definitely defeats it purpose of being able to help legitimately.

This device does not encourage use for other invalid reasons. No person would ever want their privacy to be invaded. Everyone needs to have their own privacy.

Thus, consider to think first of what you will feel if someone wants to know every activity you make in your computer.

For sure, you do not want other person to be spying you. If this idea does not sound good to you, then surely this will also not be good for the other person whom you plan to spy on.

There are dangers that this computer spy device can bring to the user. It is up to the person if he will still take the perils if the purpose is somewhat unreasonable.

It is more encouraged to use the device if the intention is for the good of the other person. Like for parents, this device will definitely help them educate their children well.

CLICK HERE FOR STEALTH IBOT

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Livewire FastTrac Real-Time GPS Tracker Review

kajay — Fri, 02 Dec 2011 16:34:41 +0000

Livewire FastTrac Real-Time GPS Tracker is actually known to be the finest real-time GPS tracker as it delivers exact data in split-second and is able to manage the consumers.

CLICK HERE FOR LIVEWIRE FASTTRAC REAL TIME GPS TRACKER

By far, updating records every ten seconds is the fastest among the same unit on the market. With this speed, consumers are guaranteed that they can receive important information immediately.

Other than the location, the device can also track the route and speed that the driver has taken. These data serves as an added bonus and can be very useful especially for worried parents of teenage drivers.

There are also multiple features that the Livewire FastTrac contains and these features give ability for the device to adapt to any given situation.

The device can be customized in such a way where it can create virtual borders once the driver goes beyond this border, notice warning will be immediately received either by mobile phone or internet.

This is extremely helpful for people who are prone to be lost while driving in a location that is already unfamiliar to them.

By setting up the device with boundary of the location only known to the person, another party will be able to get his exact location and can help him get back to the place he is familiar with.

Another good thing about this device is that it can be used without needed installation or additional software. The website already provides everything that is needed and this is another one distinctive feature of Livewire FastTrac Real-Time GPS Tracker among its competitors.

It can also be connected directly to Skype to help communicate if any problem persists while monitoring the person.

The person can either seek help to any appropriate person immediately and inform of the location of the car or can contact the driver immediately to know what is happening. If the driver is lost, the person monitoring him can simply give directions on how to get back to track.

For sure, no person will ever want to be tracked unless they consent to it. Sometimes, they consider this as some sort of an intrusion of their own privacy.

This is probably one of the drawbacks of this GPS tracker, when the person finds out that he is being tracked when he is not supposed to know it.

This is very important to consider when planning to buy the device for this purpose. Yes, it can definitely help in a way that the person is able to monitor his or her loved one but is this really necessary?

Will it be beneficial for the relationship? What will happen if the loved one found out the device by accident? These are just some questions to consider when the purpose of getting the device is only to monitor without the other party knowing that he or she is being monitored.

Benefits of this GPS Tracker device are really marvellous. However, disadvantages go in a more personal level. There is really a lot to consider when a person plans to use this product.

CLICK HERE FOR LIVEWIRE FASTTRAC REAL TIME GPS TRACKER

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iTrail GPS Data Logger Review

kajay — Fri, 02 Dec 2011 16:32:24 +0000

A GPS track logger or iTrail GPS Data Logger is a small device that obtains location information from Global Positioning System satellites. The data obtained are then stored and can be retrieved when the need arise.

CLICK HERE FOR iTRAIL GPS DATA LOGGER

This is a battery-operated device in which the battery can also be recharged. GPS track logger does not have the capacity to transmit obtained data real time.

As such, the stored data from this device can only be obtained by connecting the device into a computer. There are GPS track logger variants that also provide electronic map software that the device can interact with so that it can locate in the map the information obtained from the data logger.

Being a small device, an iTrail GPS Data Logger can be placed on any object that the person would want to track. It can be put inside a bag of a son or a daughter so the parent may know where they usually go.

It can be placed inside the car or a bicycle to know if the driver is overspeeding and the location where it usually go. Data that are recorded in the logger are the time, speed and exact location.

If worried that the logger may not be able to sustain its battery life and just shuts down, the device actually has a motion detection feature where the device sets itself on standby mode when there is no motion being detected.

And this is being done by the device automatically. Its memory has also the ability to collect 120 hours worth of data. Another good feature is that it is also resistant to water (but not waterproof).

It should just be mainly used within an object where it can avoid any contact of water. If this cannot be avoided, it must be put in a specifically designed magnetic waterproof case so that it can be attached to any object with no risk of damage due to water contact.

Data logger can be very beneficial for person who needs to do tracking. If the person suspects any unusual behaviour of his or her spouse, the data logger can be used to validate suspicion.

If the person feels that his/her young teen is keeping secrets by making different excuses of getting home late, the data logger can be useful to check on which places does this young teen frequently goes.

This is also very useful for companies providing company cars to their employees. Since mileage and location check can be recorded by the tracker, the company can validate if the company car is indeed being used for business purposes only.

The drawbacks of this device will be more on the mental and emotional state of the person being tracked and the person tracking. The device can actually result to a broken relationship due to the lost confidence over the parent, child, spouse, employee or employer.

The only key is proper communication. Through proper communication, there will be no need to resort to these devices just to validate any suspicion.

CLICK HERE FOR iTRAIL GPS DATA LOGGER

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Car Camera With GPS Logger Review

kajay — Fri, 02 Dec 2011 16:28:30 +0000

Of course, car accidents are very traumatic experiences. There are instances that the involved person will have a hard time connecting the pieces of the incident because the person is still in a state of shock.

CLICK HERE FOR CAR CAMERA WITH GPS LOGGER

Establishing who acted with undue negligence is typically the hardest to determine. This is more difficult when two vehicles are involved in the collision.

It will be easy to point finger to the other party but to determine if this is accurate will be a different issue. Definitely, no one will admit and take the blame for the accident. Otherwise, there will not be any difficulty in dealing with these cases.

One product innovation that can definitely provide a great help is a car camera with GPS logger. There are actually variants of this type of product. There is a variant that can record the 10 to 20 seconds following an incident.

Another variant can capture both the front and inside of the car. BrickHouse View-I™ Dual Car Camera, on the other hand, records the location where the vehicle has been.

CLICK HERE FOR CAR CAMERA WITH GPS LOGGER

Regardless of variant, there are actually general advantages and disadvantages of using car camera with GPS logger. But definitely, there will also be specific benefits and drawbacks for each variant.

One of the most obvious benefits of this car camera product is the ability to easily determine who is at fault when a car accident happens. In this way, there will be no need in pointing fingers to each other.

The police, lawyers and insurance companies will also have an easy job as well. The drawback on this will be if the concerned person is the one at fault in the incident.

For sure, the person at fault does not want to admit that he is indeed at fault. But because there is a video recorded on the incident, surely, it will be difficult to defend the position of the person at fault.

The GPS logger that comes with the car camera will record the routes where the car has been driven. This can be helpful when the person wants to track where he has been driving on.

Also, it he has a young teen who borrowed the car, he will know where his teen went. The only disadvantage of this is that it creates a feeling of mistrust to the person using the vehicle.

The person feels that he is being tracked by using the car. Good relationships may be ruined just because of this.

Technology has never faltered to bring new products that can help people deal with everyday living. However, along with the benefits it brings, it can also cause disadvantages that are sometimes affects much more than its benefits.

It is better to always make discernment before considering buying any product brought about by technology. Product reviews are sure of a great help to know the product even further.

In this way, the person will not take the risk of losing something worthwhile. Also, the person will be sure that he will benefit more.

CLICK HERE FOR CAR CAMERA WITH GPS LOGGER

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Black Box Micro Review

kajay — Fri, 02 Dec 2011 16:23:57 +0000

As the name implies, Black Box Micro is a single portable almost black-colored, box-shaped speaker. It is described as almost black-colored because one of its sides is actually not in color black.

CLICK HERE FOR BLACK BOX MICRO

One of its surfaces is in reddish orange color and the rest is in black. Its measurement is at five centimeters in height, six centimeters in width and 6 centimeters in depth.

The measurement serves as the reason why it is called micro. This micro box consists of a 3.5-millimeter plug with 75-centimeters audio cable, a mini connector at one end, a 75-centimeter and a 150-centimeter USB leads and the main unit.

The two USB leads are intended to provide options on how the speaker would be positioned from the audio source. There is also a mini-User Manual set in different languages.

As informed previously, one surfaces of the box is actually in reddish orange color. This is actually the Gel Audio Driver pad that serves the purpose of enhancing the audio quality and improving the volume that comes from the speaker.

Initially, this is device is intended for iPod/MP3 player or notebook users, but it can be flexible enough to be attached to any gadgets that produce audio output.

There are cases though that the cable may not be compatible to the device. In this case, a fitting connecting lead must be provided so that the speaker can be used to the device.

Using Black Box Micro to different gadgets does not yield the same results. There are gadgets that produce satisfactory audio quality output but there are gadgets that do not.

There are instances that for some MP3 players like the Creative Zen V+ MP3 player, the audio quality produced below standard results. The audio quality does not seem to improve even if the volume control was put to the highest level.

Also, the speaker and the MP3 player’s volume level should be synchronized and the LED lights that are on the front side of the speaker are supposed to indicate this however the lights failed to flash.

This absence may indicate that possibly, there are really MP3 players that are not compatible with the micro box.

On the other hand, when the audio system is used with any Hi-Fi system or computer, the speaker tends to react positively. The speaker’s performance showed notable improvement.

The LED lights that failed to appear when used with MP3 players, the LED lights started to show regular flashes in connection to the volume level when used with a Hi-Fi system or computer.

In addition, there is also a difference in the sound quality when the speaker lies flat on the surface or is hung mid-air. Good sound quality is experienced more when the speaker is lying flat on the surface than it is draped mid-air.

This is more evident if tested using one gadget only. It seems that the sound comes from two different equipment because of the two different audio quality they produce.

If the product is intended to be used for other gadgets other than MP3 player, Hi-Fi system or computer, it is best to test the product on the gadget first before even considering buying it.

CLICK HERE FOR BLACK BOX MICRO

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Top 7 Lies that Big-Time Liars Tell Themselves

kajay — Thu, 01 Dec 2011 04:01:09 +0000

Over the years, my colleagues and I have collected hundreds of stories about the most serious lies in people’s lives.

We collected stories from the liars (about the most serious lies they ever told anyone else) and from the targets of the lies – the dupes (about the most serious lies anyone ever told them).

After reading transcripts of the stories over and over again, I realized that there were predictable ways that liars fooled themselves about how the process of deceiving another person was going to unfold.

In my book, Behind the Door of Deceit: Understanding the Biggest Liars in Our Lives, I discussed each of the most common ways that liars lie to themselves. Here, I will share the discussion of the first self-deception, then list six more.

The excerpt is adapted from Chapter 14. You can read the full discussion of all of the self-deceptions, as well as the rest of the book, in paperback here, from Amazon here, or on Kindle here.

Excerpt from Behind the Door of Deceit: Understanding the Biggest Liars in Our Lives, by Bella DePaulo

Thinking of lying? Join the club. Many people who find themselves in a difficult or threatening situation are tempted to try to lie their way out of their troubles. To liars, lies are like wishes.

If only their lies really were true, life would be so much kinder, more indulgent, and carefree. And so liars egg themselves on, by telling themselves the following lie myths. I think they are best considered as self-deceptions–lies that liars tell themselves.

#1. “I can get away with this lie.”

Few liars embark upon the telling of a serious lie thinking that they are going to get caught. More commonly, they think they can pull it off.

My advice to them is, “Don’t count on it.” Despite their generally high expectations for getting away with their lies, about 40% of the liars in our research were eventually found out.

Liars can develop an inflated view of their chances of success not only because they overestimate their own lie-telling skills, but also because they fail to appreciate the extent to which the fate of their lies is out of their control.

If just one other person is in on the lie, if just one other person knows about the lie, or if just one other person knows about the bad behavior that the lie was meant to hide, then all of the lie-telling skills in the world will not save the liar from the risk that the lie will be leaked by that one other person.

Liars usually do realize that the targets of their lies can become suspicious and then try to check out their suspicions. But they are not always fully tuned in to the magnitude of those suspicions or the extensiveness of the target’s efforts to learn the truth.

Further, some dupes are adept at hiding their suspicions; thus, they can be getting closer and closer to the truth as the liar remains blissfully oblivious.

This combination of a clueless liar and a shrewd and sensitive dupe often ends on a shocking note for the liars–they discover all at once that they have been completely undone.

#2. “No one will ever challenge me – I’ll make sure of it.”

#3. “Even if my lie is discovered, I can make it up to the person I deceived. Eventually, we can have just as good a relationship as we had before.”

#4. “I have their best interests in mind.”

#5. “I’m going to confess – later.”

#6. “This is just between the two of us.”

#7. “If I can get away with this lie, there will be no costs to telling it.”

About Bella DePaulo:

Bella DePaulo (PhD, Harvard) has authored more than 100 scholarly publications, many of them about the psychology of deceiving and detecting deceit.

Her other books on deception include The Hows and Whys of Lies; The Lies We Tell and the Clues We Miss: Professional Papers; and Is Anyone Really Good at Detecting Lies: Professional Papers (co-authored with Charles F. Bond Jr.).

Dr. DePaulo is also an expert on people who are single and their place in society and in science and writes the Living Single blog for Psychology Today. Visit her website at www.BellaDePaulo.com.

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Virtual Infidelity- Is Your Partner Or Spouse Engaging In Virtual Infidelity?

kajay — Sun, 27 Nov 2011 17:19:31 +0000

Technology has advanced so far in this modern world that computers, mobile devices, and the Internet have become a part of everyday life.

has revolutionized the way people work, study, entertain themselves and communicate with each other.

However, it also paved the way for a brave, new, virtual world where people can assume a totally different identity online and used in an arguably inappropriate manner.

Such online realities gave birth to virtual infidelity, online infidelity, or in more extreme jargon “cybering” or virtual sex online. Focus on the term “virtual” for such kinds of excursions occur only virtually or in a pseudo-reality context.

Although no physical or real sexual encounters actually occur, the level of intimacy accorded by a guilty partner makes it reason enough to cause marital or relationship issues.

What is Virtual Infidelity?

Unlike traditional forms of infidelity where an offending partner engages in a physical and emotional encounter with another real person, virtual infidelity occurs only through the myriad communication channels available online: chat rooms, forums, social media, instant messengers, porn sites, webcam sites and other Web 2.0 enabled sites and facilities.

In such encounters, the offending partner and his or her object of affection communicate only through the Internet.

A large scale study was conducted back in 2000 by mental health professionals and the resulting report highlighted that at least 20% of Internet users have in one way or another engage in an online sexual activity.

The most surprising thing from this study was that it reported that two-thirds of those who admitted to such activities where either married or engaged in a committed relationship.

These figures most probably have increased tremendously over the years with the exploding popularity of social media and the proliferation of “virtual worlds” such as Second Life.

Launched in 2003, Second Life as an online virtual world allow users, who are referred to here as Residents, to enter a whole new world, create and develop their own characters called avatars, and interact with other Residents in group or intimate activities.

What’s fascinating about this world is that users can create a totally different personality for themselves – a 60-year old man can assume the persona of a gorgeous 18-year old girl.

Already reaching one million active users, many Residents have engaged in all kinds on intimacies with other users without even seeing the real person behind the avatars.

Is Virtual Infidelity a Real Affair?

There are a lot of debates and discussions going on about the moral ramifications of virtual infidelity, as people have totally different viewpoints as to whether cybering, cybersex or online infidelity can be considered a real affair.

Many argue that everything is only happening virtually and not in the real world and so should not be harmful. They consider virtual infidelity as just a harmless experiment on what they can do online. But many people also think otherwise.

They consider having an intimate relationship with another, whether it occurs only online and no actual physical contact or sex has taken place, is still considered cheating particularly if the offending partner decides to hide his virtual relationship from his real-world partner.

For them, if virtual infidelity satisfies the need for intimacy or sexual arousal of the offending partner – even without physical contact – that is still considered cheating.

The Dangers of Virtual Infidelity

While virtual infidelity offenders consider what they are doing as just a game, there are several documented cases where such virtual relationships intruded into their real lives, eventually ruining their relationships with their real-world partners in the process.

It was common in these cases of virtual infidelity where the offending partner find various excuses to get away from family activities, or even from intimate dates with their real-world partners – just to spend time online with their virtual girlfriends or boyfriends.

Many offenders argue that their excursions into virtual infidelity do not affect their real-world relationships with their spouses or partners, since these escapades occur only online and are cables on Internet lines away from each other.

But spending ten, twelve, fifteen or more hours a week in their virtual worlds can and will affect their relationships with their real-world partners – when those precious hours should have been spent with their partners instead.

Others argue that although they spend time cybering or engaged in cybersex with their virtual partners, they never really physically “touch” these partners – and should not be considered cheating at all.

However, cheating and infidelity does not only involve the physical, but the emotional aspects as well. Even if they do not have physical contact with their cyber partners, they do fantasize and are aroused by them, and that is already considered cheating.

It gets worse eventually. Soon, all the offending partner would think about is fantasizing with their virtual partners, even if they already turned the computer off.

It will affect their work, their relationship with their spouse or partners – until such time when the offending partner will go to lengths and actually pursue a physical encounter with their cyber partner.

It will be a whole new different level. This time, there’ll be no arguments questioning whether it is infidelity or not.

What Should You Do about Virtual Infidelity?

There are many cases where couples break up because of deteriorating relationships brought about by virtual infidelity.

In these cases, the offending partner would be so addicted to his or her virtual escapades that all other forms of relationships break down, or they would actually pursue meeting and getting physically connected with their virtual lovers – and leave their spouse or partner in the process.

But this should not be the case. If you feel that you’re losing your partner to someone from the online world, then begin to assess as to why he or she is doing so.

Many are attracted to virtual relationships because this is where they get the affection, the attention, and most specially the romance that they’re not getting any more from their real-world partners.

Focus on this reality. A partner who is starved for affection or even sex for that matter will seek satisfaction elsewhere, even if they can only get it through virtual means.

Like any other forms of infidelity, facing such relationship issues is very hard to handle – but it is not impossible.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Facebook Infidelity- Is Your Partner Or Spouse Having An Affair Online?

kajay — Sun, 27 Nov 2011 15:12:21 +0000

Over the years cheating partners and spouses often find ingenious ways to facilitate their infidelity.

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Most have gone out of their way to make their excursions into the forbidden as discrete and inconspicuous as ever, some devising very clever and innovative ways to communicate with their lovers without the knowledge of their spouses or partners.

As technology evolved, the world as we know it has shrunk down virtually in terms of difficulty in communication. People can practically converse with another halfway across the globe in real time and at the least possible expenses incurred.

Most of these technologies involve the online world which practically revolutionized how people live their lives in modern times.

One such area involves social networks, where websites provide a dynamic and interactive platform where people can connect and network with other people.

And this is where the problems with online infidelity come in. Just as how it is easy for people to communicate and get in touch with one another through social networks, cheating partners now find it very convenient and easy to commit infidelity online.

The Tremendous Rise of Facebook and other Social Networks

Facebook has grown so big that if it were a country it would be the third biggest nation after China and India in terms of population – roughly twice the population of the United States!

This tremendous popularity of Facebook and other similar social networking sites brought people closer together, enabling people to get in touch with family, friends and old acquaintances they haven’t met for so long.

Although already in existence since the 1990s, social networks did not hit mainstream popularity until 2004.

This may be credited to the fact that broadband facilities, internet-enabled devices, and subscription rates are now much more affordable and accessible. People can easily link up with online friends or people they share a common interest with.

And this is where the problem with online integrity started. With almost half of the people in the United States hooked up to one form of social network or another, it’s practically easy for a cheating spouse or partner to commit infidelity online.

Online Infidelity on the Rise

Counselors from the Life Connection Counseling Center, the oldest Christian counseling center in Tulsa, are worried that Internet-related infidelity is practically off the charts.

Up to 20 percent of their clients have been affected by online technology in one way or another – and the figures continue to rise as more and more people get online through social networking sites.

Separate studies from the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers and the Loyola University Health System show that the use of Facebook and social networks for infidelity activities contributed to a divorce and data from these sites were actually used by attorneys as evidence or proof of an extra-marital affair.

The Lures of Social Network and Why it is Easy to Cheat Online

One of the interesting facts gathered during the Loyola study described above indicate that people who committed online infidelity did not have this as their primary intention when signing up for social networking account.

But unlike any other communication means, social networks make it so easy for people to communicate with another person, share interests, send each other flirt messages, and as they grow more intimate might end up in cybersex.

One thing would lead to another and the cheating partner would go beyond the boundaries of the online world and actually meet with his or her cyber partner and have physical relationships with one another.

If such scenarios occur for people they only met online, the possibilities are unthinkable if the cheating partner starts flirting with an old crush, an old flame, a co-worker or a client he or she is attracted to – but only gets to communicate with them intimately online.

And just like what other areas of the Internet are susceptible to, social networking sites are not immune to the entry of people plainly intent on getting casual sex.

Social networks can also be a haven for prostitutes and gigolos creating a wholesome image or profile, pretending they’re someone else, but would later offer their “services” through private messages or links to their main “business” website.

A partner who is seeking for some sexual excitement is most likely prone to succumb to such offerings – and can easily create a fake profile or alter-ego to use in such excursions.

How to Find Out if Your Partner is Cheating on You In Social Networks

Now that you’re aware of the potential dangers of social networking sites for infidelity and the myriad channels a cheating partner can take advantage of online, you need to have a firm understand of how you can actually find out if your partner is cheating on you through social networks.

The following describes some of the more common ways although you should always be on the lookup for new trends and features in social networks that cheating partners can exploit.

The first thing to do is to know which social networking sites make it easy for a cheating partner to lurk into and interact with other people of the opposite sex.

Facebook is of course at the top because of the sheer volume of users, but MySpace has been known to provide the fastest results when searching for a potential fling online.

Craigslist, a site known for buying and selling stuff, has evolved into a channel for meeting other people.

Then, there are lots of smaller social networking sites that are primarily intended for meeting other people – and seeing your partner maintaining a profile there, albeit under a pseudo name, should raise some red flags that you need to look into.

Find time to monitor your partner’s social network profile page.

Of course, if it’s their intention to play hanky-panky online, they would create a “hidden” profile and not use their official account.

Still, there are chances that you might pick up something from your partner’s wall, their news feeds, and their friend-of-friends feeds that may include sweet nothings from someone else other than you!

Your partner’s behavior about social networks can be an indication that he or she is up to something not right.

For one thing, they may spend hours upon hours on Facebook and similar sites.

He or she may claim that they’re just updating their profiles or getting in touch with old friends but under normal circumstances that will not take hours to accomplish.

Another peculiar behavior that should ring bells is when your partner suddenly turns the screen away when your presence is near or when you enter a room where he is browsing the web on. It’s an indication that he or she is hiding something they don’t want you to see.

A Facebook addict is different from someone who is having an affair online.

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An addict discusses posts, pictures, videos, and funny status messages from friends and family, while someone having an affair online would always keep mum of his or her social network “activities”

While none of the items listed above are real proof that your partner is cheating on you online, these may be clear indication that something is amiss.

The only sure way for you to find out exactly is to install spy software or hack into his password – but that would be illegal.

Some may go to the extreme of hiring a cyber investigation professional who will use legal means to look into possible accounts of your partner on various social network sites and gather information there.

While such actions may already be extreme for many, the key thing here is if you have that hunch that something is not right, whether you suspect your partner is committing online infidelity and is actually having a physical affair, you should learn how to see the signs – and be ready for what these signs are telling you.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Financial Infidelity- Sign Of A Cheating Partner

kajay — Fri, 25 Nov 2011 22:34:27 +0000

Infidelity is a devastating thing and one of the most painful experiences one can encounter in a relationship. However, wondering if your partner is unfaithful or not can be devastating as well – and could be much worse.

Worrying if your partner is cheating on you day in and day out can gnaw away from the inside and will eventually affect your health and your wits.

You owe it to yourself to know and confirm if your partner is guilty of infidelity or not, but unless you caught him or her red-handedly or if he or she would be honest enough to tell you the truth – you’ll have no easy way to know for sure.

You just can’t confront them about your suspicions from out of the blue. You will need solid, undeniable truth about their infidelity.

There are ways on how you can work around this predicament and be as close to certainty as possible and confirm if your partner is cheating on you or not – and that’s through your partner’s finances.

Yup, you read that right. There is a thin line between infidelity and certain financial issues that your suspect partner may be having. You just have to learn how to see the signs and soon you’ll be piecing things together.

But wait – you must first understand that there are some subtle differences between a cheating partner and financial infidelity, although they both relate to finances.

The first involves a cheating partner who’s manifesting his or her infidelity through changes in their financial patterns.

The second involves cheating on you on your finances per se, particularly more so if you and your partner have previous policies regarding the sharing of money and other financial arrangements.

Financial Infidelity

Financial infidelity does not necessarily mean that your partner is lying from you about money because of a third person involved.

It may involve hidden expenditures or debts, possibly through a separate account, that you are completely unaware of or without prior discussions with you.

Such instances would weigh more and have more profound impacts on relationships with combined financial arrangements.

Whether the hidden “expense” involves the purchase of a new video game or that classy red Italian shoe, up to 80 percent of couples in the United States spend some money secretly, according to a nationwide survey conducted by CESI Debt Solutions.

In another survey commissioned by the National Endowment for Financial Education in partnership with ForbesWoman, 31 percent of recipients admitted to committing financial infidelity.

Although financial infidelity can have negative effects on the relationship as well, it does not necessarily mean that the hidden expenses occurred because it was spent on actual cheating activities – with another person.

This should be entirely clear otherwise you will lose your objectivity.

To set things clear and to confirm for a fact if your partner is cheating on your or not by monitoring his or her financial activities, the following guidelines are provided in detail.

Catching Infidelity through Finances

The following describes some tips and techniques on how you can investigate your partner’s finances and financial activities as a tool to let you know and confirm for a fact if your partner is cheating on you or not.

As with any investigative approaches, you should be discreet and secretive in performing these methods without breaking any legal boundaries, otherwise you’ll tip a potentially cheating partner off and throw your investigation way off course.

The best time to catch a cheating partner is when they feel most comfortable that they are getting away with what they’re doing with you completely clueless about it.

It is during this state of false comfort that they will make a mistake with their finances and leave a trail for you to catch.

So, maintain that “clueless” persona and conduct your investigations as discretely and secretively as possible – and you will achieve your goals and set your mind at peace.

Change in Appearance or Wardrobe – If your partner was previously always satisfied with wearing whatever is comfortable or the first thing they get their hands on from the closet, it would be quite suspicious if he or she suddenly makes a complete turnaround then starts buying and wearing stylish clothes and underwear.

It may be a sign that he or she is doing a modeling job – for someone else in private!

Changes in Accessories and Toiletries – A partner who suddenly had an urge to buy trinkets, toiletries, teeth whitening strips, cologne, perfume, watches and other small, seemingly unnoticeable stuff that they previously have no interest on should register as a red flag that something’s fishy

A Sudden Interest in Technology and Gadgets – A partner who spends a considerable amount on gadgets, new mobile phone equipments, laptop, tablets or whatever new technologies he or she previously have no interests on should warn you that something’s not right.

The purchases alone, oftentimes made without you aware of it, is already quite suspicious but if he or she spends more time sending text messages, emailing something or suddenly becomes very active in social networks, then something’s really not right – unless they’re just turning geek!

Spending More Time Outside than at Home – You’re home may be a precious abode for you and your partner, but when he or she spends more time and money outside – supposedly in the gym, health club, bowling alley, or whatever – that should ring some loud bells.

Another variation is that he or she now spends more time going out for “lunch” or “dinner” supposedly with a boss or client, and spends extra cash doing so.

Suspicious Purchases – A cheating partner may not be as careful as to get rid of receipts of unknown purchases in their bags, wallets or clothing – purchases that you know nothing about or were not discussed before the purchase was made. The receipt can reveal the store as well as the location where the purchases were made.

If the item purchased is not suspicious enough, then maybe the location where the purchase was made could raise some alarms – particularly if it’s way out of their usual routes.

Changes in Attitude about Finances – There are subtle changes or patterns in your partner’s financial activities or attitude towards finances that could be tell tale signs that he or she is cheating on you.

Try discussing finances with your partner and if he or she becomes resistant, indignant or would make conscious efforts to steer the discussion away from this topic, then something’s not right.

Another angle here is when your partner insists on handling finances his or her way – conducting transactions alone then fails to discuss the details with you afterwards.

Hiding a New Account or Credit Line – A spouse can pull out a bank statement or credit report for joint accounts or accounts in your partner’s name that lists you as an authorized user and check the status and flow of your finances for any red flag activities.

However, a cheating partner may be devious enough to use a hidden account instead or open a new credit line without you knowing about it.

It may not be legal for you to run a credit check on your partner though, but you can always look out for slips in their actions: an overheard conversation, a tip from a friend, or a friendly remark from your bank teller – that might reveal some clues to a hidden account.

Lack of Transparency in Your Financial Relationship – Sound relationships usually involve couples that are open and transparent about their finances. You can always pull out your individual credit records and discuss your copies together and see what areas you can work on.

Refusal to do so for whatever reasons is sufficient grounds that he or she is hiding something from you – and would demand some better explanation for not doing so.

Some may think that checking into the financial activities of a partner to confirm if they’re cheating or not may cross some boundaries that should not be crossed.

But for a partner agonizing night and day believing that their partner is cheating on them, such investigative approaches is a vital necessity that should be done subtly, discreetly and legally of course – but performed at the soonest possible time nonetheless.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

10 Ways To Tell an Unconvincing Lie And Bust A Cheating Spouse Who Tell It

kajay — Fri, 04 Nov 2011 13:49:17 +0000

When trying to catch a cheating spouse, it’s not so much what they say that relly matters but how they say it. So if you suspect your partner is being unfaithful, read the signs from his or her body language.

Body language is a more honest form of communication because we often do them unconciously. They are found not only in gestures but also in the tone of voice and the way we speak.

So you want to test whether your sweetheart is two-timing you?

Here’s a technique. Try and bring up the subject of infidelity and see how you partner reacts.

Or if that’s too obvious for you, a more subtle approach is to ask your spouse to account for his or whereabouts – but try to do so in a nonchalant and circumspect way.

Remember that you don’t want to tip him or her off that you are on the prowl; because if he or she so much as suspects that you are snooping into his or her affairs, you can kiss your investigation goodbye because you can be certain that if indeed your partner is sleeping around, you won’t find a shred of evidence of it anywhere anymore.

Once you’ve popped the question or started the discussion rolling, listen to how your partner answers. Your partner could very well be cheating on you if he or she:

1. Speaks in a monotone

Liars — and cheaters in this context — attempt to mask their lies by exerting contol over what they say and how they say it. Not only are they almost void of facial expressions, they also inadvertently control the natural inflections that come out in a normal conversation. Thus, when you listen to a liar cover up his or her excuses, the tone is monotonous.

2. Speaks with hesitation

Cheaters, when caught off-guard, tend to answer a question indirectly and hesitantly. That’s because they are formulating their made-up story as they go.

Hesitation is evident in the way they trail off at the end of their sentences and their speech is punctuated by a lot of pauses. Their eyes also tend to move around a lot as they search for inspiration to make their stories more believable.

3. Uses too much fillers

The prevalence of “um”, “err”, and “ahh” in your spouse’s speech also indicates uncertainty and hesitation. This is a big red flag especially if your question is simple and straightforward like, “I called you at your office yesterday but your secretary said you were out the entire afternoon. Business meeting?”

4. Talks fast and high pitched

Liars would want to mask details in their lies that they could not account for nd talking fast would seem to blur the details making it hard for the listener to follow. Talking fast is also an unconscious reaction to the stress of lying. This also becomes more evident as the pitch of a liar’s voice also becomes distinctly higher.

5. Attempts sarcasm or humor

People in clandestine affairs would naturally shy away from discussions that pertain to infidelity and cheating. But if ever the any find themselves right in the middle of it, the most they can do to avoid the topic is to use humor or sarcasm.

For instance, when asked to volunteer their opinion regarding a TV soap’s take on a philandering husband, your gulity husband would say, “well, the wife was asking for it.

I mean look at her, she doesn’t stand a chance against the mistress”. Cheaters use both humor and sarcasm not only to answer the uncomfortable question but also to justify their own affairs.

6. Over explains

As mentioned before, cheaters attempt to mask their lies and another way they go about this is by making their explanations complex and wordy.

Longer and more detailed explanation buys the liar more time to concoct a better and more convincing story. A complex explanation, with several twists, not only gives the lie a semblance of credibility but it also becomes so much more difficult to follow.

7. Is uncomfortable with silence

Cheaters are uncomfortable with silence because they are desperate for assurances that their lies are believed. For a liar, silence is tantamount to disbelief.

This is also another reason why they tend to say more than what’s necessary — that is, to fill in the growing silence and to further convince their audience.

8. Repeats the question

If push comes to shove and you are done subtleties, you might very well be tempted to ask your spouse a direct question point blank: “Are you sleeping with so-and-so?”

While that is not often a good idea as pointed out above, it’s not always avoidable. Now you can’t very well expect a cheating spouse to say “Yes, I am”. Most likely, you’ll be hearing a resounding “No” for an answer.

But here’s the catch: if the answer is “No, of course not”, then chances are he or she is telling the truth; but if the answer is “No, I am NOT sleeping with so-and-so”, that is very probably a lie.

9. Is defensive

Again, if the same scenario as above plays out and you can’t seem to stop yourself from confronting your partner, it’s not so much the words — most often a denial — that matters but how it was said.

Generally, the guilty party will be defensive that is why they over explain and expound on their answers unnecessarily. If your spouse seems angry and has a lot of excuses rather than seem hurt and confused by the answer, then he or she just might have a lot of things to hide.

10. Is evasive

Not only are cheaters defensive, they are also evasive, giving you indirect answers.

Instead of just plain saying “No, I’m not” to the question of whether they’re cheating, philandeering spouses would beat around the bush with follow up questions such as: “What made you say that?” or “Why would I do that?” This allows them to gauge how much you know and buys them time to make up their excuses.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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From the Cheater’s Eyes: 6 Eye Movements That Can Bust a Cheating Partner

kajay — Wed, 02 Nov 2011 16:31:13 +0000

You simply can’t ask your partner straight out if he or she is cheating on you. Unless your partner is indeed cheating and really means for you to find out, asking him or her would only be met with an outright lie.

But then again, you might be reading the signs wrong and your partner is indeed not cheating. Such baseless accusations have their own way of damaging the relationship.

So you say to yourself, “if only there was a way to be certain”.

Well, there are ways — countless ways in fact — to know for sure if your partner is cheating without letting on that you are unto him or her. Finding the clues to your partner’s faithfulness doesn’t even have to take so much effort or even money!

Exactly what are we talking about here? Well, the very first thing that you must be observant about when confronted with doubts about your partner’s fidelity is to read their body language.

While such non-verbal cues are often difficult to interpret, they give far better clues than do the words — or outright lies — of a cheater.

You might have heard that the eyes are the windows to our souls — that over-used cliché is still 100% true.

Most body languages may be difficult to interpret but they are nonetheless very reliable — if you know how to interpret them. And probably the most east to read of these body languages are those spoken through the eyes.

So is your partner cheating on you? Watch out for these signs:

1. A cheater’s eyes are too busy

Cheating is tantamount to lying and when we lie, we feel restless from the stress of suppressing information that would give out our lie. At the same time, we try to come up on the spot with sensible excuses to cover our lies and that adds significantly to the stress.

The restlessness of a cheater is reflected in the excessive movement of his or her eyes. This is due to the fact that your partner is avoiding looking at you while trying to look about for clues to create and fortify his or her lies.

2. A cheater’s eyes will avoid eye contact

As discussed above, liars often find it extremely difficult to maintain eye contact. So if your partner has something to hide from you — especially something as huge as his or her philandering — he or she will not be able to look you straight in the eye.

This is especially true if you are discussing a topic that treads a little too close to the subject of his or her infidelity.

For example, if your husband is getting home later each night, ask him if there’s a huge project at work that requires him to work overtime.

Or if your wife has several excuses not to spend the weekend out of town with you, pretend sympathy for her busy week and offer to cancel your trip to be with her. How do they react to your sympathetic attitude?

Cheaters will automatically turn away and stammer their excuses, afraid that the guilt in their eyes will expose them.

3. A cheater’s eyes will look to the side…the wrong side

When asked a question that requires us to recall something from memory or fine details about recent events, we don’t always have a ready answer.

Sometimes we need to jog our memory for the required answer. Notice that when need to do that, we look slightly down or up and a little to the side.

For right-handed people, recalling something means they will look to the right; for left-handed people, they look to the left.

If a right-handed person looks to the left, chances are he or she is not recalling a fact, but concocting a lie. Same thing for left-handed people who look to the right.

4. A cheater’s eyes will look at you and look quickly away

When a cheater is put on the spot, he or she knows that the eyes would give away his or her lie away. A cheater might know that excessive eye movements or avoiding eye contact would spell out their guilt for them, loud and clear.

And so they would attempt an eye contact. The trouble is — and this is especially true of amateur philanderers — they still could not maintain that eye contact.

Nevertheless they would attempt to make it, only to break it, and then attempt it again…and again and again and again.

What happens is that your partner — if he or she is cheating and trying to lie through his or teeth about it — will look at you, only to look away quickly and to do this several times.

5. A cheater’s eyes will look at your forehead instead

This is a style employed by more experienced liars — and cheaters, of course. They know that maintaining eye contact is essential for convincing you of their innocence.

The thing is, it would still be extremely awkward for them to look you straight in the eyes. And so they reach a compromise — and that is to look at your forehead instead or between your brows.

When you and your partner are meters apart, figuring out whether he or she is looking at your forehead instead of your eyes would be pretty difficult. If you want to test this, you need to move a little closer to your partner.

Doing so actually forces him or her into a tight corner — literally and figuratively. If your partner looks or turns away, that could very well be an indication of guilt.

6. A cheater’s eyes will maintain eye contact…a little too long

Really seasoned liars have practiced the art of concealing the guilt from their eyes. The good news is that they have not perfected it. That’s because they still make a mistake that is so obvious to one who knows what to watch out for.

Expert cheaters know that you would be watching out for suspicious eyes movements and so they would look you straight in the eye, coaxing you to believe their made-up stories. The thing is, they are so intent on trying to convince you with their eyes that they look at you for far too long than is normal.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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9 Telltale Signs Of A Cheating Partner

kajay — Tue, 01 Nov 2011 13:03:29 +0000

For most couples, infidelity just about tops the list of their relationship phobias.

Although there are those lucky ones who are totally secure in their partners, they are few and far between. Most of us simply have had some doubts about the faithfulness of our significant other at one point or another.

But when are you supposed to shrug off those errant thoughts?

Put another way – and probably more urgently – when are you supposed to give those nagging doubts some very serious consideration?

You, of course, don’t want to waste precious time, resources, energy, and emotion chasing what might turn out to be absolutely false (and end up feeling guilty and berating yourself for mistrusting your spouse).

Before you take any serious investigative steps, therefore, you need to look for telltale signs of a cheating spouse.

And you don’t have to look far.

Signs of cheating are quite evident in facial expressions and that’s where you need to start looking. So how to tell if your spouse is cheating on you? Look closely at his or her face for the following:

1. Furrowed brows

Liars often frown when they have to answer seemingly innocent questions that could bring their lie to the fore; the frown is an indication that they have to think their answers over very carefully or that they are extremely irritated by it or both.

2. Downcast eyes

Innocuous questions such as why he or she is out all night, why the credit card bill has skyrocketed, or why he or she missed dinner will not only elicit a furrowed brow but may also be met by a very guilty party with downcast eyes.

3. Touching the nose

It’s a quirk of human nature that we tend to touch our nose when we find ourselves lying – and a cheating partner is no different. Maybe there is some truth to Pinocchio after all?

But it’s not just the nose-touching that you need to watch out for; reports also point to observations that liars also can’t keep their hands off their earlobes, neck, lips, and hair.

4. Tighter lips

Ever notice that when you are awfully peeved at someone you tighten your lips into a thin line?

Well that’s also how cheating spouses look when they are faced with questions that they have to lie about – lies, for example, to cover up their extramarital affairs.

Or they could also be angry at you for putting them on that very prickly spot where their lies come very dangerously close to becoming exposed.

5. Lip biting

Biting the lips could be an indication of several things: discomfort, anticipation, furious thinking, holding something back, or guilt.

While it may be difficult to pinpoint which it is your partner is feeling, watch out for this sign together with other facial expressions before jumping to conclusions.

6. Face turned away from you

A liar – and therefore a cheater as well – is automatically on a defensive mode and he or she would want to erect barriers when he or she feels as if you are being confrontational (even if you did not mean to be).

Lacking barriers, the most they can do is to turn their face away from you.

A liar may be aware that turning their body away may raise suspicions, and so will downcast eyes, but turning their face away during the course of the “confrontation” is an involuntary reaction that a liar almost always has no control over.

Again, it doesn’t have to be a confrontation – it can be any discussion that treads uncomfortably close to what they have to lie about.

7. Limited facial expression

An innocent person’s face is animated. On the other hand, a person who is under a lot of stress – stress because of lying – would limit his or her facial expression.

That’s because he or she wants to “control” his or her facial movements believing that by doing so means not giving anything away.

In this case, “poker face” is nothing but a well-practiced facial expression and is far from the natural expression of a guilt-free person.

8. Facial muscle twitching

Twitching is a quick and involuntary movement of facial muscles that indicates irritation, excitement or amusement that a person tries very hard to control.

When a lie is potentially close to becoming exposed, you can be very sure that a person is neither amused nor excited when the corner or his or her lips quirk suddenly or an eyelid bats a little too fast or a muscle near the temple twitches.

9. Words don’t match the facial expression

Outright lying is never easy and if you find that your partner’s facial expression do not coincide with the words they are saying, then you just might have a cheater on your hands.

For instance, try gauging the way your partner says “I love you” to you (if you can get them to say that in the first place) – does he or she look away?

Do you detect an almost imperceptible frown? Is it rather a bit offhand than what you used to remember?

Admittedly, facial expressions – which for the most part are non-verbal clues – are the most difficult to interpret. This is more so if you have never been particularly sensitive to the nuances of your partner’s facial expressions.

The emotions that play across a person’s face could be interpreted in various ways and you might be interpreting intense feelings such as worry, irritation, fatigue, anger, etc differently.

The above clues, therefore, should be used with caution. These are not the be-all-and- end-all to finding out a cheating wife, husband, girlfriend or boyfriend – they are merely red flags.

Nevertheless, they are meant to trigger warning bells in your head that tell you to be more watchful of your partner.

One last advice: never, ever let on that you are starting to get suspicious at this early stage. You would want to lull your partner into a false sense of security so that they start giving you real, hard evidence on their illicit affairs.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Signs of Cheating in Long Distance Relationships

kajay — Tue, 11 Oct 2011 20:45:39 +0000

The recent downside in the economy has affected people in so many ways aside from the obvious impact it made on their sources of livelihood or employment.

There is a growing trend among spouses needing to work in another state or even abroad to make ends meet and the same holds true for other people living together or involved in relationships.

Such situations would more often than not – lead to tension, stress, and cracks in their relationships.

But one of the most pressing concerns in long distance relationships looming over the heads of the partner who gets left behind is the specter of infidelity.

Long distance relationships and infidelity are not necessarily synonymous entities, but the possibility of cheating appears to be higher in long distance relationships than any other for the obvious reason of physical separation between partners for longer periods of time.

Suspicions of infidelity arising in a long distance relationship can leave a partner feeling confused, and oftentimes utterly helpless about the situation.

Is she cheating on me…. is he sleeping with someone else right now… such questions that plague the minds of spouses who gets left behind.

They don’t need to be in this desperate situation much longer as there are ways to identify the signs of cheating in long distance relationships and confirm or refute their suspicions of their partner’s infidelity – and finally have peace of mind.

Types of Infidelity in Long Distance Relationships

Before delving on how to detect the signs of cheating in long distance relationships, you need to first understand the types of infidelity in such situations.

Knowing so would help you identify the problem and probably pinpoint the real root cause and the reason behind why your lover is cheating in the first place – so you can take action accordingly.

* Physical Infidelity

It’s a basic fact that many men and women like some variety in their sex life. Some harbor sexual fantasies that they are afraid to open up to their lovers or cannot do so because of their current physical separation.

Giving in to these sexual cravings, these men or women would seek other means to satiate this need while away from their partners. This can be likened to food where cravings and hunger pangs would never go away unless sated.

In such cases, you will need to understand that physical infidelity is usually limited to simple satisfaction of carnal desires and would not take precedence over their love for family and their life partners.

The problem however is that physical infidelity can eventually lead to a different level beyond the physical that can be irreparable if left unchecked – which will often lead to permanent separation or divorce.

* Emotional Infidelity

Emotional infidelity is physical infidelity in reverse – it starts with satisfying the emotional needs before it evolves into the physical. Being in a close and intimate emotional relationship with another while away from their partners technically does not break any vows or commitment they may have as it usually lacks any physical relationships at first.

However, such relationships would lead a person to share more personal aspects of their lives with the other person and this will eventually lead to physical infidelity and destruction of the relationship.

Signs of Cheating Your should be Watching Out For

There are several potential signs of cheating and infidelity in a long distance relationship but it would depend on the nature of the people involved.

Communicating with your long distance partner would be your primary tool for detecting and identifying these signs – in their manner of speech, their lack or changes in how they communicate, what they talk about when they’re with their partners and their overall attitude towards them.

* How Your Partner Speaks to You

Speech experts can detect dishonesty in how a person would emphasize certain sentences or particular words.

Honest persons would usually argue in their defense if you accuse them of infidelity but a liar on the other hand would usually disregard this or downplay them with submissive words.

Another sign would be changes in the frequency or how often they would talk with you on the phone and how changes in how long these talks would last.

They would often resort to conflicting reasons such as being busy or they really don’t like talking on the phone at all and other things they can think of.

* How Your Partner Seems to Have Disappearing Acts

There may be instances where your long distance partner seems to disappear or be unaccounted for several hours or even days, and then usually coming up with strange alibis that would later become even stranger or more unbelievable as these “lapses” in time become more often.

* How Your Partner’s Attitude towards You Seems to Change

During the first periods of long distance relationship, people are often eager to talk or communicate with their partners through any means available.

Lovers at this stage would often talk to each other whenever it is possible and would take as much time as possible. Changes in this initial attitude can be a sign that something is amiss.

His or her interest in knowing about your activities, particularly the small and trivial ones, would slowly decline.

It would take them a longer time to respond to emails or replying to text messages.

When they’re back at home they would often appear distant or preoccupied and would rather go out with friends that stay home with you.

* How Your Partner Talks about Other Men or Women

A cheating partner would still seek and try very hard to maintain your trust in them.

One way they will do this is to talk about their exes and their past problems with them, people of the opposite sex they meet while away, and new friends they gain – in an attempt to gain your trust with this sudden “openness”.

How to Confirm that Your Long Distance Partner is Cheating on You

Short of hiring a private detective to confirm your suspicions, there are other ways to confirm and know if your long distance partner is cheating on you or not.

Communication is again the best tool next to body language in knowing whether they are hiding something from you.

Rather than bombarding or asking them a series of questions that seems interrogative or accusatory, you can simply ask them what they did while they were away – and observe and listen carefully as to how they will carry the conversation.

Liars would often fluctuate in their speech, speaking either slowly or too fast and would often take time to respond to seemingly basic questions. Don’t make it too obvious that you are trying to catch them with trick questions.

You could also talk about or make up a story about a certain friend who caught his or her lover cheating and observe how they will react – and be uncomfortable – with the story.

Just pay attention to every detail in their speech, their mood, and the words they use and he or she will expose themselves in due time.

What’s Next?

If you are separated from your partner in a long distance relationship for whatever reason, you have a greater chance that he or she is cheating on you.

Many so-called experts would advice that such relationships would not work out or survive.

True, having a long distance relationship can be very difficult and would put your relationship or union at risk, but the final outcome will always depend on you.

What you do after detecting the signs of cheating, and confirming that it is so, would depend on whether you want to end your relationship – or make the necessary steps to prevent such end from happening.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Understanding Infidelity Better with Statistics

kajay — Mon, 10 Oct 2011 19:54:09 +0000

Since the dawn of recorded time, infidelity has always been an integral reality to many relationships.

Husbands or wives cheating on their spouses, individuals engaging in promiscuous activities behind the back of their partners – these and a myriad more stories abound throughout history and most certainly occur now in current society.

In the past, getting accurate information or statistics about infidelity is nearly close to impossible for the simple reason that many if not most occurrence of infidelity go unreported, undiscovered or remained within the confines of the relationship.

However, the times are changing and people are now more open and willing to discuss information about their extra-marital affairs, flings, or whatever they choose to call instances of infidelity.

Aside from that, the information gathering facilities and techniques available at present can now more accurately gather, monitor and track infidelity statistics, either through online or offline means.

Compiling these statistics is not the only one that improved over the years but the platform for reporting this information – magazines, newspapers, blogs, websites, etc – are easier to access and are very much available.

With all these information and statistics available about infidelity, there remains one question that may pop up in any reader’s mind – how will all these benefit me?

The following delves into the latest statistics and information available about infidelity and how it has made a tremendous impact on the lives and relationships of millions of men and women throughout the world.

Knowing such information can help one answer the questions haunting many individuals at night or even in their waking time: is their spouses or partners cheating on them and if they do – what shall he or she do about it?

Who is more Likely to Cheat – the Man or the Woman?

It is a common practice among friends to discuss or argue amongst themselves who between a man and a woman would most likely cheat on their partners.

The most common assumption that has been accepted for ages is that men are most susceptible and most likely to commit infidelity in any way defined.

While this may be true to some extent, it would be interesting and educating to know just how much men and women cheat on their marriage and relationships – and the following statistics can give light.

According to the report “Susceptibility to Infidelity in the First Year of Marriage” from the Journal Research in Personality, an estimated 30 to 60 percent of all married people in the United States will engage in an act of infidelity somewhere during the course of their union.

These figures may actually even be higher considering that almost fifty percent of marriages in the United States will most likely end in a divorce or separation.

It would be safe to assume that in these relationships that are falling apart, any one or both half of the relationship will succumb to infidelity at one point or another.

In another report from Menstuff.org there are about 22 percent of men and 14 percent of women in the United States have engaged in acts of infidelity against their spouses.

That’s one in five males and one in six women in the US who have cheated on their partners or spouses.

In a report from CheatingSpousesHelp.com, men have more tendencies of committing acts of infidelity at least once in their relationships.

However, the gap is not really that big as about 40% of the total number of people cheating on their spouses is women.

Playboy Magazine puts in an even bigger percentage of men and women committing infidelity according to poll they conducted.

75% of male respondents and 65% of women participating in the poll confessed that they had sexual relationship with someone else aside from their spouses – usually with their workmates.

The Primary Reasons for Infidelity

The report from Menstuff.org stated that up to 90 percent of people in the United States agree that infidelity is wrong in a relationship, and yet a good 50 to 60 percent of marriages face instances of infidelity at one point or another during the course of their marital union.

Why is this so? Why are people cheating on their spouses?

According to the Wall Street Journal, infidelity is common among younger people, particularly those under the age of 30.

Experts say that this to the many opportunities of spending time away from their spouses at this age.

On top of that, many among the younger generation of today have developed the habit of getting into as many sexual relationships as possible just before they get married – and the high cases of infidelity is an indication that this habit never left at all.

Greater and more accessible means of communication also contributed to the increase in infidelity.

The Internet changed how people communicate and interact with each other, but it also paved the way for more infidelity channels to materialize as in the case of social networks, forums and discussion groups.

What can start as long-distance or online relationships can take the next level and can become physical and eventually sexual.

Another reason why infidelity occur is that married couples sometimes do not reach the level of emotional connection that they so desire.

What they do is to seek gratification for this desire elsewhere: a workmate, a friend from the gym, or an online friend in a social network.

Such ventures usually begin just to satisfy their emotional urges, but intimacy can grow eventually – and a bit too much – that the relationship will evolve into something deeper and sexual.

When will Infidelity Most Likely to Occur?

According to CheatingSpousesHelp.com, most people engaging in acts of infidelity are aged between 25 and 39.

Not surprisingly, this is also the highest demographic range among people who file for divorce. Infidelity usually occurs during the early years of their marital union, most particularly within three years of their marriage.

However, there are cases on infidelity that occur among couples who have been living together as husband and wife for 30 years or even longer.

What this implies is that infidelity can occur whether you and your partner are still young or whether you have been living together for decades.

Situations change – economically, time spent together, or changes in people you interact with – that can affect you or your partner’s susceptibility to infidelity.

Abrahms Spring, the author of “After the Affair”, reported that 1 in every 2.7 couples have committed an act of infidelity at one time or another.

One-day affairs or flings only account for a small 1 percent while those lasting more than a month but less than a year account for up to 50% of occurrences while 40% are accounted to affairs lasting over two years. Up to 70% of those in such affairs usually end up with the divorce.

What do these statistics tell?

There will come a time in a relationship when people suspect their husband or wife committing acts of infidelity but could not otherwise prove it.

Knowing these infidelity statistics will simply indicate that you are not being paranoid, and that you are not alone in feeling this way.

Infidelity is universal and will not choose age, gender or social status – anybody can be a victim.

Knowing for a fact that your partner or spouse is cheating on you can only lead to two realities: to end the relationship and settle for a separation or divorce, or know the primary reason why your partner or spouse is cheating on you – and make all efforts to win them back.

The choice is up to you.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Online Infidelity- How Online Infidelity Is Ruining Relationships And Destroying Marriages

kajay — Tue, 05 Jul 2011 12:58:47 +0000

Nothing happens by surprise. Marital infidelity is preceded by a series of seemingly minor events, that slowly preys on the strength of the relationship eventually leading to its total collapse.

A famous person once quoted that “each partner who is tempted by his own desires attract and seduce you. These desires, once conceived, give birth to sin, and this, once grown, brings forth death”.

The danger behind the number of hours spent in front of the computer chatting with strangers is that it slowly attracts us to this other person online and have feelings for them because they listen and talk long hours, be it few times a week or every day to the extent that they become our obsessions and fascinations.

What started as an innocent banter or chat gradually becomes a necessity in our lives so much that we question our partner, our family and our relationship to invoke an adventure that we seems to be missing with the current partner or spouse.

When looking for a consolation, we have the Internet where we find a former love, or perhaps the first love. Our longing would then go afloat and we begin to compare this relationship to the one we have at home.

In some other cases the relationships are with strangers, with whom we start to have genuine feelings with and become attracted emotionally and even physically in due course of time.

These are warning signals that could indicate a problem.

Of course, you should never draw conclusions without knowing for sure but still these would be helpful signs to watch out for red flags.

1. Changes in the hours of sleep. Sleep late or wake up earlier than usual or necessary.

2. Requires privacy. Especially when at the computer. Changes the password and keeps secrets.

3. Ignores their duties. He no longer has the time to mow the lawn and she spends less time with children at bedtime. However they have enough time to spend in front of the computer.

4. Frequent lies.

5. Suffers a personality change. If he used to be cheerful, now he suddenly becomes cold.

6. Loses interest in sex. When a person loses interest in sex with his partner, chances are he is having a cyber affair, either in person or only virtually.

7. Invests less time and emotions in your partner. Ignores family rituals, such as sharing a bubble bath or talk after dinner. This could be because someone else is ‘filling’ in the emotional space.

On the other hand, there are 7 suggested actions that aim to prevent infidelity and to protect the marital relationship:

1. Choose wisely: Do not spend unnecessary time with someone of the opposite sex.

2. Share wisely: If one day you realize that someone is sharing secrets and intimacies about you and your marriage, that’s a red flag. An emotional affair with someone can damage a relationship.

3. Seek to be in public: If you need to spend time with a person of the opposite sex, then be with them in public or a common friend. By doing this, you are more likely to do what is proper and best for you and your relationship.

4. Increase the investment of time at home: Strong marriages are achieved by spending time together, laughing together, playing together. If you are not spending enough time with your partner or spouse, make that a priority.

5. Pay attention to what you think: If you spend all day along thinking of all the positive attributes of this new found love and the negative attributes of the partner or spouse at home, you are more likely to have an affair.

Instead focus on the positive attributes of your partner and list down what made your partner or spouse attractive to you in the first place.

Work on reigniting the passion and romance in your relationship.

6. Do not compare: We all have bad habits, quirks and errors. It’s very unfair and dangerous to compare your spouse with a new acquaintance, because at the end of the day your partner is the one doing all the hard work- changing diapers, cleaning the house, doing the laundry etc.

7. Seek Help: Asking for help is a sign of strength, not weakness. Seek help from someone who is willing such as a Christian family therapist, a good counselor, etc.

They will give you a valuable perspective to develop new strategies to protect, defend or rebuild your marriage.

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5 Signs Of Cheating In A Long Distance Relationship

kajay — Sat, 02 Jul 2011 04:08:32 +0000

Any relationship is difficult and there will undoubtedly be potential problems at some point and infidelity may occur. These difficulties are even more exaggerated if you are in a long distance relationship.

There are always signs that someone is cheating on you in a long distance relationship or may be about to cheat on you and the key is to watch out for these signs and act on them, however, it will be best if you have proof before you overreact and accuse your partner of cheating on you.

1. Lying – Even if it’s a little white lie

If your long distance partner is away from you and lying you should be worried. It doesn’t matter if it starts with a tiny white lie. Any sort of lying shows a sign of being devious and should be treated with real caution.

It may be as simple as not telling you that there were members of the other sex who went with them for drinks after work or not mentioning to you that they were going out to an all night party.

Soon after it can escalate to not telling you that they are going out with a colleague for drinks and a meal alone.

Don’t jump to conclusions straight away but be aware that lying once and then covering up the lie can quickly evolve into a dangerous situation where all the trust is gone in a relationship and trust is even more important in a long distance relationship.

If you don’t trust your partner then there is usually a gut feeling behind it. Trust your gut feeling as that is one of the true signs that your partner is cheating on you in a long distance relationship.

2. Your Partner suddenly has a new friend on a social network site and is sending and receiving a lot of messages

With the increased use of social network sites like Facebook it is so easy to see who people are talking to when they are chatting to them.

If your partner suddenly has a new friend who is popping up a lot on their feed then take note and be cautious, especially if this new friend hasn’t been spoken about to you.

It’s obviously not fair and also impossible to stop your long distance partner making friends but watch out if their new friend is hot and single and very interested in your boyfriend or girlfriend.

Be extra wary of those late night messages, they can easily carry over into phone conversations and late night rendezvous!

3. Increased arguments particularly started by your partner

It’s not uncommon for one of the people in a relationship to use fighting as a way to break up a relationship.

So be aware if yours is making constant unnecessary arguments; they may be trying to shift the blame towards you and trying to cover their guilt with wild excuses and to make you feel like you are at fault.

This can be used as either a way to end the relationship or simply as a cover not to speak to you for a few days while they get away with their new special friend.

Anger towards you can also be a sign that your partner is becoming increasingly worried and stressed about something; it could well be their secret lover.

4. Partner is being extra suspicious

Often a sign that someone is cheating on you in a long distance relationship is that they become overly suspicious themselves. Are you being questioned over zealously about where you have been, who with and for how long?

This could be an indication that the subject is on your partners mind and they are deflecting there paranoia onto you to cover their tracks.

5. Never knowing where they are, why they missed your calls or simply avoiding talking to you

When a person appears to be avoiding talking to someone it is usually because they are avoiding them or hiding something.

It may be that they are plain ignoring your calls because they feel guilty about something or simply that they couldn’t answer them because they were busy with someone else.

Either way, missing a regular talk slot or even a special meeting time that they agreed to and generally being flaky with their commitments is the biggest sign that your long distance relationship might not be working or your partner might be cheating on you.

With all of these signs, caution is advised as being overly paranoid might make the person you are in a long distance relationship resent you for being over possessive and even cause them to cheat.

However, it is well worth keeping an eye on their actions and see if they match any of these 5 top signs that someone is cheating on you in a long distance relationship.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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10 Signs Of A Cheating Spouse

kajay — Sat, 02 Jul 2011 04:03:40 +0000

Cheating or infidelity could cause a major trauma in a relationship. It is an abusive use of trust endangering the bond between not only you and your spouse but also your relationship with friends and family.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

When you lie to your spouse, you lie to yourself, your children, your family and friends as well; because to keep a secret, you have to isolate everyone out of it.

However, infidelity by nature is not meant to be kept hidden for a long time. Minor circumstances and behavioral change would give you away, probably sooner than you think.

So here are some tell tale signs of a cheating spouse.

1. The Total Make-Over: Sudden physical grooming like going to the gym, buying a new set of fashionable clothes, wearing an expensive cologne, etc. are signs that there is something “not right” in this scenario.

The moment your spouse looks like he is going to a prestigious awards night on his way to work is just a wee bit too suspicious to ignore.

2. The rocky intimacy: when your spouse lacks the appetite or interest in your usual sexual adventures is another clue to be mindful about.

This could be the other way around, if your spouse is too eager to please you in bed than the usual regularities means that he is making an extra effort to cover up his tracks.

This is the same when he touches you more often than usual during breakfast or dinner or when you are just washing the plates are signs that something really is going on.

3. Late night excuses: When after dinner he suddenly remembers he has a business meeting in the middle of the night, when your spouse spends too long a time in the internet especially at night, when he gets text messages and “wrong number” phone calls or replies with his back on you. This could be strong indications of cheating.

4. Going the extra mile: when work meetings take place in another city or state, often over the weekend and even far too often at that.

5. Unwarranted anger: when you spouse throws a fit when you ask him even the most trivial of questions like; how was his weekend, or why does he have to go to another city for a meeting, etc. This behavior indicates that he does not want his private affairs being scrutinized, and that you should just leave him alone in his business.

6. The non-committal comments: This is the opposite of the above indicator. Usually when being asked he would fidget or pretend to do something while in conversation with you. He will then give off un-interesting comments about his day, his work, and how tiring it is to be away from home often, etc.

Usually, the guilty spouse would then change the topic somewhere along your line of interest. This tactic is to divert your interest towards yourself and not to him.

7. Uneasiness: When you go out for dinner and he is restless, often checking the people around, constantly looking at the door, or going to the restroom every 10 minutes are signs that he does not want to be seen with you or he is avoiding a chance encounter with his affair.

8. Unbalanced checks: If you notice a drastic amount of money withdrawn from your checking account. More often than not, a cheating spouse is clumsy when he spends his money, leaving trails of unwarranted credit card bills and payables.

9. Going straight to bath: He goes straight into the shower when he gets home, or, if he separates his laundry from yours after taking them off. Scents and perfumed oils are hard to get rid of, thus, he could be spending quite a time scrubbing himself clean.

10. Talk is cheap: When he makes simple degrading comments about your weight, your hair and how you look. This abuse is commonplace for a cheating spouse to do. He is unconsciously making comparisons between you and his affair.

Sometimes, he may also show a lack of interest in things that you do or your appearance. The more distant he is to you, the better for him to do his whims.

These are just some simple signs of a cheating spouse. Individual signs could be ignored, but collectively, these signs are footprints leading to a path of a major crash in a relationship. Be keen , be wise and be strong in dealing with this situation.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Why Emotional Infidelity Is More Dangerous Than Physical Infidelity

kajay — Tue, 28 Jun 2011 13:08:19 +0000

Most would usually think that emotional infidelity is less serious than physical infidelity but both share the same devastating effects as having a physical affair.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

It can in fact elicit forbidden relationships especially when you are too attached with an individual other than your spouse. Emotional infidelity comes in when one’s emotional needs are unmet.

This leads to the association of an individual with someone other than his or her spouse. A person committing emotional infidelity does not even have the slightest idea that he is committing such forbidden acts.

There are too many justifications that the signs of impending danger are often overlooked.

Emotional infidelity is much more profound than physical infidelity. Ever heard of the adage “there is nothing so seductive as that which is forbidden”?

With physical infidelity, it is easy for a man or a woman to get over the situation.

Both can be considered cheating but with emotional infidelity the betrayal is kept hidden. When you fantasize about someone or you have lustful feelings toward someone it can grow into something more serious that may put your marriage at risk.

This happens when you see the person you are fantasizing about on a daily basis and you seem to be so attached with each other. Physical infidelity takes place when you hold hands, touch or kiss.

There are warning signs of physical and emotional infidelity and these are something you should watch for if you want to save your marriage.

Since physical infidelity is rooted from emotional infidelity, you should pay heed first to the signs of emotional infidelity and this may include:

• Emotional infidelity usually begins through friendship. This may take place at the workplace or even through a chat room.

Wherever the friendship started, this is something that you need to control as deep bond of friendship may just lead to something more serious.

If you are going to look at the bigger picture, making friends with the opposite sex may seem to be harmless but it can pose a lot of danger to your married life when you start to withdraw from your wife and prefer your “new found friend’s” company.

• If you spend more time with your “friend” than your wife, this is an obvious sign that you are about to border on emotional infidelity.

If you used to spend the weekends bonding with your family and you start changing plans and prefer to hang out with your “friend” it is high time you assess your feelings.

At first, the meetings are too casual but once you show a sign of disinterest in spending time with your spouse and you become too intimate with the other person, this can lead to physical indulges.

These often take place as means of covering up for the qualities that your spouse lacks.

• If you seem to share details of your married life that are supposed to be kept within your married life, you may also hover on the brink of disaster.

Once you share intimate feelings with the “friend” she will also have the tendency to tell you about her personal problems which also involve her married life.

When confrontation arises, most will defend that they are merely friends when the things that happened were the exact opposite.

• You should also watch out when your spouse mentions new friends and new places that have not been normally a part of his social life.

Watching his daily routines will also be necessary as a cheating spouse is more likely to change his daily routines and behavior.

• Emotional infidelity comes your way when your spouse starts to become too critical about your appearance and he/she no longer finds it appealing to spend time with you.

To avoid emotional infidelity you need to:

Steer clear of situations that may lead to forbidden love affairs
This means you need to avoid making friends when you think that you cannot control your emotions.

You should know where to draw the line and if self-control is an issue, better avoid developing friendships with the opposite sex by all means.

Heed the warning bells

Physical infidelity will not even take place if you know how to put a stop to emotional infidelity and you can do this by simply heeding the tell tale signs of emotional infidelity. Stop convincing yourself that you are “just friends”.

Get out of the situation while you can because you will not realize that you have already subjected yourself to emotional infidelity until it is too late.

If you think that your relationship shows the above signs of emotional and physical infidelity do not ignore these signs as paying attention to them may actually save your marriage.

If you think that your spouse is cheating on you, do not be afraid to express your feelings. If you feel insecure about your relationship tell him or her about it. It is important that you keep your communication line open.

Discuss your personal concerns and allow your partner to explain his or her side. Shouting at the top of your lungs will not resolve anything. In fact, it can worsen the situation.

You can even talk to a marriage counselor if you think that your married life is already on the rocks. When discussing your problems try to see things in your spouse’s perspective.

Do not underestimate the power of emotional infidelity as this is more dangerous than physical infidelity. If you keep on entertaining sexual thoughts outside your marriage, it can lead to something disastrous.

If you think that your spouse is neglecting you, do not hesitate to tell him or her about it. He/she may not have the slightest idea that you are longing for his/her love.

Both of you may be very busy that you failed to give each other a little loving. Be honest with your feelings if you want to fulfill your emotional needs. If you remain mum about your personal feelings, nothing will be resolved.

You always have to be on the lookout for the signs of emotional infidelity because this can produce more deleterious effects than you know.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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How To Use Cell Phone Recon To Catch A Cheating Spouse Or Partner

kajay — Fri, 10 Jun 2011 15:12:52 +0000

Is Cell Phone Recon Worth A Try?

Cell Phone Recon gives you the ability to monitor your cell phone and log both incoming and outgoing text messages.

CLICK HERE TO KNOW MORE ABOUT CELL PHONE RECON

With Cell Phone Recon, you can track your cell phone in the unlikely event you lost it. You will no longer have to keep on guessing the location as the software can track it for you.

With all these awesome features of Cell Phone Recon, I must say that it is suitable for families who want to keep track of their spouse’s and child’s daily cell phone activity.

Even your spouse’s suspicious behavior can be monitored using this technological break through. Now apart from its ability to track and monitor each and every cell phone activity, here are other features of Cell Phone Recon that will help you decide whether or not to purchase the software.

If you want to play detective, Cell Phone Recon is the software you can use to begin your mission of logging all cell phone activities including email, text messages and phone calls.

If you have a kid and he told you that he will stay late at school for football practice, you can check whether or not he is telling the truth with the use of Cell Phone Recon.

This software is easy to install and you will be provided with an installation web address and a license key. Once you are on the installation web site, enter the license key when prompted and you are good to go.

The installation process only takes a few minutes.

The GPS tracking feature of Cell Phone Recon is what makes this software capable of “intruding” into your child’s or spouse’s private world. It is usually compatible with major smart phone brands including Android, Blackberry, Windows Mobile and Symbian OS.

The software has also been tested to work with a vast range of US carriers including T-Mobile, Sprint, Verizon and many others.

One of the many advantages of Cell Phone Recon is the stealth operation which is mainly used for covert monitoring.

It is also capable of logging information from any internet browser and view GPS location of phone using Google Maps. It is also compatible with most major cell phone brands and service providers.

You are also entitled to 5 years of unlimited monitoring using one-time license fee. With all these perks, you will surely be convinced to get yourself a Cell Phone Recon Software.

However, just like any products, Cell Phone Recon has its own drawback and for Apple iPHone users who want to take advantage of this software, the bad news is this will not be able to work on such cell phone brand.

Another downside of the software is that it only lets you listen to phone call records instead of listening in and this can drain the battery quickly as a result. If GPS feature is turned off, the software’s ability to track GPS location will not be available as well.

The software allows you to track or monitor sms text messages so long as your mobile phone is web enabled. For cell phone email, the software can provide you with the email content and the email address where the message was sent from.

These also include the subject, date and time. I can say that Cell Phone Recon can be your best friend as paranoia will no longer feast upon you if in case you are suspecting your spouse of cheating on you as you can remotely view the number that your spouse dials and he is oblivious to the fact that you are actually monitoring his daily cellphone activities.

Cell Phone Recon is considered to be a mobile spy because it can monitor, track and even record your child and partner’s cell phone activity.

The best thing about the software is that it provides all the detailed information you need regarding a call, text message or email. It does not need any hardware to install the program to your cell phone.

If you wish to install the software, you must have an internet-enabled carrier as this software will not work if you do not have this feature. You can only monitor the cell phone if the owner or user has given you the permission to do so.

The GPS tracking system of this mobile phone can track the exact location of the phone every 15 minutes. This feature is usually powered by direct satellite but GSM technology will be used if the phone is not in the direct location of a satellite.

It also has a secure control panel and once the monitoring activity takes place, the cell phone owner you are trying to monitor will not receive any notification that his cellphone is being monitored or tracked.

If you are running a business firm and you want to monitor suspicious employees this feature can also be used. This software costs around $169 and for one time use only.

And since it is easy to navigate, the entire monitoring process will no longer be a tedious process. However, if you want to give your spouse and children a little privacy then this software is not for you as it unscrupulously monitor every activity and may even breach the confidentially of both cellphone calls and text messages.

You may not love the idea of following them around using the software but you will like the fact that you are well aware of there whereabouts.

If you are not comfortable with the idea of spying your spouse or children, may as well stick to the old fashion way of checking up on your family member.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

References:

http://www.spytechs.com/phone-recorders/cell-phone-recon.htm

http://www.eyespypro.com/products/Cell-Phone-Recon-Covert-Mobile-Phone-Activity-Monitor.html

http://spybubble.org/cell-phone-recon-review-view-texts-and-calls-track-phone-with-gps/

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How To Use Spark Nano To Catch A Cheating Spouse Or Partner

kajay — Sat, 28 May 2011 17:25:17 +0000

A relationship stands on one important element, loyalty. Relationships are usually destroyed because of the lack of loyalty, because of cheating, because of infidelity.

The desire for someone better usually is the cause of infidelity. When you can’t satisfy your partner anymore, he/she will find a better one. That has been the natural attitude of man.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT MORE ABOUT SPARK NANO GPS TRACKER

The common sign of a cheating partner or a cheating spouse is secrecy. When your partner or spouse is hiding information from you, then most probably he’s up to something bad.

There is no need to hide information from you, not unless it’s information that you don’t want to know. Information about his whereabouts is very crucial, since this can prove if he/she is at work, or at a date with somebody else.

When he goes home late at night, or when he constantly leaves your house, and when he hides his personal life from you, that’s a good time for you to start doubting. But, you can never be too sure not until you have big and weighty evidences.

What you must do is to catch a cheating spouse or partner and remove the doubt once and for all. Luckily, Spark Nano makes that task easier for you.

Spark Nano is a small device that can be put on your partner or spouse’s car. It is the world’s smallest GPS tracking device that measures only 3 inches tall and 2 inches wide.

It is designed to make GPS tracking easier and enables you to see your partner or spouse anywhere he/she’s at, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

All the information is given on easy to understand maps, and you can even customize them. With this device, no information will be hidden from you, and you can gain a complete access to your partner’s whereabouts.

That sounds interesting doesn’t it? Then you will ask, “how to use Spark Nano to confirm once and for all that your spouse or partner is cheating?”. Well it’s simple, and this article will show you how.

Removing the doubt whether or not your partner or spouse is cheating will require you to be resourceful, for most of the time he/she will find ways for you to not know it.

You have to be one step advanced, and using Spark Nano gives you that advantage. Because Spark Nano is only small, you can easily hide it on your partner or spouse’s car.

You can even use a magnetic case so that you can hide it at the bottom of the car, and that’ll give the device a complete stealth.

Your partner won’t even notice that you put it there. You can hide it anywhere at the car, since Spark Nano is so small, no one will even notice it.

Once the Spark Nano is on the car of your partner or spouse, you will gain complete access on his whereabouts.

You will know if he really stayed late for work, or just go to some place to meet with another girl; you will know if he is really on a business trip or a trip with someone that he is having secret affairs with!

It makes perfect sense tracking your partner’s car; after all it’s this vehicle that he’ll be using to travel different places.

You can access the information of the whereabouts of your partner using a computer with an internet connection. That’s all you need, and you will gain the information on where your partner’s at, what time he went there, what time he left the place, etc.

The server that will be showing your partner’s information is secured, so you’ll be sure that you are the only one that has access to it.

GPS map locations will be made with pinpoint accuracy, giving you the complete knowledge of your partner’s whereabouts.

You can know your partner’s exact location 10 feet under the sky. It will give you the exact places ordered chronologically, so you can know if your partner or spouse is really at work on a given time, or went into other place.

With this device is installed, all the information needed will be shown, and the secrets of your partner will be finally revealed.

You can have the ability to set points that are considered “Alert Zones”.

Say, you’ll be setting the house of the person you think that your partner or spouse is having affairs with, when your partner enters or exits that area you will be notified and you will receive a SMS or Email.

This is helpful, because when you call your partner or spouse he’ll often say that he/she is at work, but when you receive an Email or SMS saying otherwise, then that’ll prove that he/she is p to something.

It also has a long life of battery which lasts 30 days on normal usage. It is also motion activated, so it only works when the car is moving, thus saving more battery.

The battery is also rechargeable, so if it drains out, just plug it on the wall or using its USB connector, and it’ll be as good as new.

The Spark Nano is also as designed to withstand the harshest climates, it is water proof so there is no need to worry if you placed it at the bottom of your partner’s car.

One disadvantage may be given on Spark Nano, and it is the cost. It’s not cheap, but since the information gained with this device is very important, and with its reliability and compactness, then that just outweighs the cost. It makes every dollar you pay worth it because of the information that you will gain.

Trying to catch a cheating spouse or partner is difficult, but with technology nowadays it can be simplified.

With Spark Nano, you can track your partner’s location with pin point accuracy, without anyone knowing it. Just go online and you can access all of your partner or spouse’s location.

Finally, you can remove the doubt that you have on your spouse or partner. You can now be sure if he/she remains loyal to you, or if he/she is having an affair with someone else.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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How To Use iPhone Spy Stick To Catch A Cheating Spouse Or Partner

kajay — Sat, 28 May 2011 16:35:02 +0000

Does your partner or spouse go home late at night?

Does your partner or spouse go out every so often?

CLICK HERE TO KNOW MORE ABOUT iPHONE SPY STICK

Does he/she hide his/her private life to you?

If that’s the case, start considering that your spouse or partner is hiding something that you do not want to know, and worst is that he/she is cheating.

That makes perfect sense, after all why would he/she hide information from you? People only hide information that they do not want others to know, and in this case, what you do not want to know.

All relationships stand on the element of loyalty, and once one begins to lose the loyalty, the relationship collapses.

It usually happens when the other person is not satisfied anymore with his/her partner. When dissatisfaction happens, infidelity usually occurs.

So if you are starting to doubt your partner or spouse’s loyalty to you, what you ought to do is catch a cheating spouse or partner, and have evidences of his infidelity. But that task is not easy.

Just because you think that your spouse or partner is cheating on you, doesn’t constitute that he/she is actually cheating. And worst, if he/she is really not cheating and you ask him/her about it, he/she will surely get angry.

Due to the fact that when someone is doing acts of infidelity, one does everything he/she can to conceal the evil deeds.

And that is why it will be very hard to be sure if your spouse or partner is still loyal to you. If you wish to know the truth, you must be one step ahead.

Luckily there is a device that you may use to catch a cheating spouse or partner, and it is the iPhone Spy Stick. It is a device that can be used to recover deleted information on someone’s iPhone.

This makes perfect sense, after all most of the acts of infidelity are arranged using cell phones; dates are arranged by it, communication happens using it, etc.

A cheating spouse or partner is not stupid though, that is why he/she will make it a point that no trace is left behind.

A cheating spouse or partner will delete all the information that may prove of his infidelity.

Text messages by the person he/she is having secret affairs with, and call logs to the secret person will surely be deleted, and he/she might even change the name so that you won’t suspect a thing. What you used to know to be “Mike” on the phone, might be “Michelle” in reality.

But luckily, iPhone Spy Stick can solve that problem.

So you will ask, “how to use iPhone Spy Stick to prove if my partner or spouse is cheating?”. It’s really easy, and the task of catching a cheating spouse or partner will be done, to remove all the doubt that you have.

It is a device that will be inserted on the iPhone using the USB port. Once inserted, the iPhone Spy Stick will collect deleted information from the iPhone, and you can access them when you insert it on your computer.

The information that will be gathered are very important, and here are some information that can be gathered to name a few:

1. Text messages. This is one of the most important, for you will know what are the messages that your partner or spouse is receiving and making.

Of course, a cheating partner will delete such data, and would want none to see it, but using iPhone Spy Stick you can access deleted data, and see what your spouse or partner is up to.

2. Internet History. This is important once again. Because you would want to know what websites your partner is visiting.

Knowledge on what things are being brought from the internet by your partner is valuable too. As they say, you can know a man basing from his garbage, and deleted information is a way that you can really know if your partner is cheating or not.

3. Calendar reminders and Appointment. This is important too. You could see if your partner set up a meet up to someone.

4. Call History. This is important again. Using this, you can see who is talking with your partner or spouse and who had he/she been dialing. You could even know for how long they had been talking.

If he constantly dials a stranger, it’s a good thing to investigate about that number and to know for yourself if your partner is cheating.

There are other information that can be attained using iPhone Spy Stick other than the four. Deleted Graphics and Photos, Contacts, Dynamic Text Data, Voice Memos, Map History, and iPhone properties can all be accessed using iPhone Spy Stick. All of them are useful in tracking down a cheating spouse or partner.

A good advantage of using iPhone Spy Stick is you don’t need to install anything on the iPhone. Just insert the device and the information will be gathered.

The device looks like an ordinary Flash Drive, so your partner won’t even know that you are having an access to his/her deleted content.

And since few people know that the deleted data is still accessible, then your partner wouldn’t even be vigilant.

The bad thing about it is that you should have a physical access to the phone each time you want to use it, thus you have to borrow it, or get it while his sleeping.

Well, that problem is easily solved, considering that even cheating people lets their partner have their phone, because they tought that they already deleted “evidences”. Well, they are wrong.

iPhone Spy Stick works on all iPhones. You can access all deleted information just by inserting the device. With this, catching an infidel will be easier.

You can now remove the suspicions and know once and for all if your spouse or partner is still loyal to you.

Remember that they won’t delete information that doesn’t need to be deleted, but information that may serve as evidences of their infidelity, is something that ought to be deleted. Thanks to iPhone Spy Stick even deleted information can be accessed, thus all secrets will be revealed.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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How To Use Flexispy To Catch A Cheating Spouse Or Partner

kajay — Sat, 28 May 2011 15:31:01 +0000

One of the most important elements in a relationship is trust. But, incidents come that you just can’t trust your partner anymore.

Time will come that you will question your partner’s loyalty. Uncertainties on your partner’s faithfulness will arise and you’ll start to think that he/she is cheating from you.

CLICK HERE TO KNOW MORE ABOUT FLEXISPY

And the numbers regarding infidelity are alarming: 54% of wedded men and 70% of wedded women are not aware that their partner is cheating on them. A good relationship or a happy marriage may suddenly turn for the worst because of infidelity.

When the time comes, that you doubt your partners faithfulness on you, the best thing to do is to know if they are really cheating. You can’t just accuse using weak evidences, because you will never be sure not until you have strong facts proving the infidelity of your partner.

What you have to do is to catch a cheating spouse or partner, and have strong evidences. Luckily, there is a cell phone application that can help you.

Flexispy is a spyware installed on the cell phone of the person that you want to spy on or monitor; in this case it’s your partner or spouse.

And once this spyware is installed on your partner’s phone, he/she can’t access it, only the person who installed it, in this case it’s you, will have the keyword to access it.

Installing a spyware on someone’s cell phone to catch them cheating makes sense, after all 90% of infidelities involve the use of cell phone.

Now, you will ask “how does this spyware work?” or “how to use Flexispy to confirm if my partner is cheating on me?”. This article will explain how the spyware works, and how you will catch your partner if he/she is cheating on you.

Flexispy has 5 features that’ll enable you to monitor, observe and spy on your partner.

On their own this 5 can create a strong evidence, but using all 5 features will give you the complete picture of what your partner is up to, and if he/she remains loyal to you.

Flexispy will give you the complete evidence to prove and to know once and for all if your partner is cheating on you.

The first feature is the Call Interception.

This program works by listening to your partner’s phone calls. By using Flexispy, you can secretly listen to your partner’s phone conversations, anytime, anywhere.

All you have to do is to specify the suspected numbers that you think your partner is having secret affairs with.

When cell phone calls are made to the suspected number/s or from the suspected number/s then an SMS message will be sent to you.

Calling the targeted cell phone is what you have to do next, and that’s it. You can now secretly listen on your partner’s conversation with a suspected person that might have secret affairs with him/her.

This makes the task of catch a cheating spouse or partner easier, since you can listen real time to the conversations that are made by your partner.

Even with just this feature, you can identify if your partner is cheating, but there are 4 more features that can give you more evidences.

The second feature of Flexispy is GPS Tracking capabilities to you.

This means that you can know the exact position of where your partner is. Using Google Maps, you can identify the location of your partner and know if he/she is really on work, or has secretly met someone else without your knowledge!

When you log into your account, you will have the ability to view your partner’s real time or historical locations, it’s all up to you.

You can see where he’s at right now, or where he went awhile ago.

The third feature of Flexispy is Spycall. This feature gives you the capability to turn on your partner’s microphone by calling from a number that’ll be created by you.

This is useful because you will know what is happening on the surroundings of your partner, and can prove if he/she is on the workplace, or on a meet up with someone. It’s just like your ears are with him/her anywhere he/she go.

The fourth feature is SMS and Email Spying. This feature is extremely useful and in some cases solidifies the proof on someone’s infidelity. This gives you the ability to track and read all of your partner’s SMS and Email messages.

You can immediately know if someone is cheating just by reading their messages. 75% of cheating wives and husbands are caught using this feature.

The fifth feature is View Call Logs.

This feature gives you all the details on your partner’s outgoing and ingoing calls. You will have the ability to see how long calls are made, what time calls are made and to whom calls are made.

It even gives you the ability to know the exact cell phone number of the one that your partner called or the one that called your partner.

With all those features, you can surely track and confirm once and for all if your partner or spouse is loyal or an infidel. Flexispy is not a perfect software though, despite of all its useful features, it has a few disadvantages.

The first disadvantage is without you getting an access to your partner’s phone, you can’t install Flexispy. There are no other ways to escape that. If having an access to your partner’s phone is impossible, then just buy a new phone and install that phone with Flexispy, and just give it as a gift.

That’ll surely solve the problem.

Another disadvantage is it doesn’t work on all phones; it only works on Blackberry phones, Symbian and Windows Mobile. Another one is it comes with a cost. A very good spyware like this does not come for free, its approximate cost is around 140$-360$.

Despite a few disadvantages, its useful features surely outweigh them. By using this spyware you can now prove and confirm if your partner is loyal or not.

You can gain complete access to almost anything that he/she is doing, thus giving you the capability to monitor him/her and to see if you should continue the relationship or not.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Facebook Infidelity- Harmless Flirting Online Can Lead To A Full Blown Affair

kajay — Wed, 11 May 2011 23:43:12 +0000

Being a victim of a cheating partner it is indeed a painful experience. What makes it even a more haunting one is when your partner has been doing the wrong deed right under your nose, or in some cases, right in your computer.

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To avoid feeling stupid and sometimes, feeling responsible for keeping a blind eye to your partner’s illicit Facebook activities it is indeed a good idea to explore more about this field.

There are millions of people engaged in Facebook each second. You can’t blame it! It is indeed addicting to interact with people. There’s a famous saying, “No man is an island”, and this constant need of human beings to socialize and connect to its own specie dates back to early human civilizations.

Prehistoric men and women used to hold storytelling sessions with their tribes around bonfires during nightfall. This is part of their civilization. As humans, it is within our genetic make up to belong and be accepted in a circle, a group, a society.

With today’s technological advances, the early storytelling rituals have evolved into an easier, faster and more convenient way of communication- sans bonfires and tribe leaders.

Facebook has changed the course of sociology by simply reinventing the modes of long distance communication.

How powerful is Facebook?

Facebook defies distance. It doesn’t matter if your friend is in Greece and you live in a small town called Wallah-Wallah, you can still gain access to his daily endeavors.

Facebook defies time. It allows for two people, who have not seen each other for decades, to reconnect and update each other.

Facebook defies privacy. Today, we can tell exactly what one person is thinking, we can identify his whereabouts and even his most embarrassing photos on the internet can now be spread like wildfire. Thanks to

Facebook photo-tagging.

Unfortunately, because of these conveniences, we also need to pay a price. Facebook can also defy fidelity in a relationship. By simply clicking on old flames, we can get ourselves in a whole lot of trouble.

The works

It begins with a simple click of a button. You check your Friends Request List, and find out that your old classmate added you as her friend.

Facebook then asks you, do you “Confirm” or “Ignore”? Many people do not understand that this is the most critical point in one person’s social and emotional life.

By confirming a friend into one’s Facebook account, you are actually allowing this person to gain access to your life.

So which button do you click? How can you spare yourself from a potential damage to your current relationship? How can you tell if it is safe or if it’s swimming in unchartered waters?

These are just questions that will inevitably run into your mind at this point. And usually, if not all the time, we stick to our biological make up. We hit Confirm!

The next thing we know, we are chatting with the new and improved versions of our grade school seatmate who used to tease us about our high pitched laughs back then.

And perhaps during that time the teasing seemed annoying, if not merely platonic, today these kinds of “harmless” teasing can seem endearing.

Thus, a little flirtation can go on. Taking a tour down memory lane as we rekindle with past crushes, ex love affairs, high school flings, college quarterback stars and even that hot ex-coworker whom we never got to date because we used to be too self conscious back then, can be truly very engaging.

Today it can be high school, college, or small town Temecula all over again. Although this can be good news to our social life, this is definitely bad news to our current relationships.

Why? It is simply because it creates a bigger avenue for reconnecting with people we don’t want our partners to know about.

Facebook and its relation to cheating

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In the science of emotional cheating the concept is not focused on sexual activities. Emotional infidelity is actually more rooted on the side of emotional closeness.

The desire of one person to feel more connected and comfortable with a person instead of his or her partner defines the gateway to all infidelity cases. Facebook is a tool that opens that gateway even wider.

If we open our eyes we can actually realize the many points of conversation there is available for our partners to discuss with their controversial Facebook friends.

They don’t even need to feel that uncomfortable nervousness in initiating conversations because Facebook gives them the privilege of a non personal approach.

This means that talking to your crush in person, for example, is even more threatening to the ego than sitting behind a computer and typing in your pick up lines. Internet communications makes you less vulnerable than personal correspondence.

Hence, writing compliments and flatteries on the comments box of one’s Facebook photo or clicking on the “Like” button under his or her status can definitely open a whole can of worms in an existing relationship.

So how do we know which actions are safe and which are deal breakers? Good question.

First of all you need to ask yourself. What will I benefit from this? What is my intent?

Say you are on the verge of accepting a friend request from an ex girlfriend.

You need to be able to assess if your partner is okay with the idea and if you and that ex have clearly established a suitable closure to your romantic relationship because ever engaging in a platonic one. If not, then this may not be a good time to be clicking that “Confirm” button.

If we turn the tables around and you are contemplating about adding your ridiculously good looking next door neighbor into your Facebook friends, what is your intention behind this idea?

Do you really just want him to be your friend?

Or are you making things harder for yourself if he will begin flirting with you in Facebook? If so then better just skip him and go on to searching for your long lost relatives instead.

How do you know which comments are appropriate?

Again think first before you say what’s on your mind. Do you ignite a fire by making flirty and sexually-provoking remarks about a friend’s Beach Vacation album, such as “I’d like to get dirty on the sand too, LOL! Hahaha!” ?

Or as a respect to your current partner, would you rather just write down neutral and safe comments such as “The weather looks nice out there!”?

These are the simple yet very powerful things that one needs to consider before creating any emotional damage into your relationship.

What to do when Facebook flirtation gets initiated by other people?

Communicate with your partner!

Inform him or her right away because sooner or later if that issue would be raised in the future and you have failed to let your partner know it can be used against you. Always make sure that your hands are clean in every situation.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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10 Signs Your Partner Is Lying To You- Here Is How To Spot A Liar

kajay — Wed, 11 May 2011 23:13:16 +0000

Romantic relationships are one of the main breeding-grounds for liars merely because when there’s commitment involved, inevitably, certain expectations are being set.

And if these expectations are not met, lies begin to do the compensating. It starts with white lies. Lies that people think are safe and harmless because it makes people feel good and reassured.

Say your wife asks you if she looks fat during her third trimester of pregnancy. Even if she looks like a whale, a white lie would indicate otherwise- where you’d probably say “You look like you just gained a few baby fats, Sweetheart, nothing to worry about!”

People generally consider white lies to be harmless because they are polite and sensitive to the feelings of one person. These are minor lies and may not necessarily show any physical or verbal traces.

On the other hand, well-evolved lies are much more complex.

Serious lies, such as making up stories to cover up Boys’ Night Out last night, or denying a crucial accusation which you know can cause critical and life-changing consequences when caught, are definitely detectable.

Think of your average poker game. If the stakes get higher, the players know that this is the time to be guile, cunning and deceitful.

From scratching your ass to the frequency of swallowing your saliva, your playmates can decipher your every move.

It’s more like a liar’s game. If you can bluff your way into a full house then it’s about time to cash in the chips and call it a night.
Thus, to let you know which cards are being played, here are some lie-detecting guides:

1. Too much eye movement

They say that the eyes are the windows to the soul, which is why it’s not surprising to see poker players wearing sunglasses.

A liar’s eyes will move a lot and shift quite frequently to avoid your gaze because the liar is afraid that you’d pick up on something from his or her eye expression.

Think of it as a defense mechanism known as ‘avoidance’. Eye contacts can create a connection and liar will try very desperately to ensure that doesn’t happen.

2. Staring too long

An unfocused pair of eyes is an elementary clue that a person is lying, but do not be fooled if your partner is also using prolonged staring as a lying weapon.

Since it is common knowledge that less eye contact can give a liar away, generations and generations of liars in this world have figured out a way to counter this by doing the exact opposite.

If your partner is staring at you for too long than usual while telling you about his out-of-town meeting on the weekends, then it can also be an indicator of lying.

Veteran liars do this quite well. They’ve lied so much in their lives that they have found a way to control their eye movements.

3. Pupil Dilation

Pupils are also indicators. No! These are not pupils as in grade school students we’re talking about. We’re referring to the pupil as in that dark, round point at the very center of your eyeballs that constricts with light and dilates when it’s dark.

Anyway, pupils usually dilate when a person is profusely lying. This is because adrenalin is being pumped harder in the body due to a sympathetic nervous system response.

And by the way, remember the words “Fight or Flight” in Human Biology?

It’s the sympathetic nervous system that’s responsible for producing chemicals in our body to help equip us with strength when we are faced with a stressful situation, such as a confrontation.

Whether we “fight” as in tell the truth, or “flight” as in make up a lie, our bodies show certain involuntary activities that are very hard to control. This is why your words may be saying “No” but your body is blatantly saying “Yes.”

4. Blinking

A good way to determine if your hubby is lying to you is to see how much blinking there is involved. Liars blink less frequently because they are trying to control their facial expressions.

They want to blink less in order to stare more closely into your eyes, to give you the impression that they want you to believe in.

That’s the thing about lying. You’re not only trying to give out a lie but you’re also trying to make sure that the person you’re lying to is buying it.

5. Looking Down

Liars look down when telling a tale. This is because they are not scanning the part of their brain that recalls information. You see, people who tell the truth usually look up when narrating a story.

This is a normal sensory coordination when a person is truthfully recalling certain details or events, as if one is searching for the memory ‘up there’ in his or her head.

A liar looks down because he or she is not trying to recall, instead, he or she is composing and making up a believable story to sell.

6. Poker face

Do you ever wonder how the poker face looks expressionless? Other than the eyes, the poker face controls the lower facial muscles.

Obsessive smiling, fake grinning, lip twitching, teeth-cringing and jaw-dropping movements are sure-fire clues of amateur liars. Veteran liars know this too well so they, instead, result to controlling their mouths while lying to you, hence the poker face.

7. Use of objects

Liars will fight tooth and nail to protect their secrets so they will unconsciously use objects to distract their interviewers during an interrogation.

Case in point, they will tap a pen on the table, play with their rings, pretend to look for things in their purses or simply type on their Blackberries while being questioned.

This creates a communication barrier between the interviewer and the “suspect”, thus letting them off the hook.

8. Shifting their weights

FBI investigators watch out for the behavior of criminals through their surveillance cameras. They know that the spoken words of a suspect are not always the basis for credibility and can practically have no value for them.

In a close investigation, authorities rely closely on the body movements displayed in the interrogation room. They review the tapes and watch for any hints.

A shift in weight before a suspect responds to a question buys him more seconds to think about what he or she is going to say.

So if your partner suddenly changes his sitting position, crosses his leg, scratches his buttocks, or stands up and sits right back on the chair, chances are, he or she is unconsciously taking more time to think of a way out.

9. Parroting

Whilst most of the lying involves the non verbal responses there are also verbal cues that can help you pick up on a lie. For after all, “less talk, less mistakes,” that’s what good liars know for sure.

So in the attempt to limit the talking a professional liar will not only skip on the miniscule story details but they will also use your own wordings or sentences to deny any allegations.

For example, “Did you go to the strip joint the night that we argued?” The liar typically replies, “I did not go to the strip joint the night that we argued.”

10. Too polite

People who are too polite can also be up to no good. Just because they say what you want to hear it doesn’t necessarily mean that they are telling the truth. Many law enforcers know this.

That’s why there are car chases. When they see a suspicious-looking driver on the road, police officers can tell if he or she is trying to mask the real hidden intentions by an uncharacteristic use of overly polite words.

“Good day, Officer. How may I be of assistance to you?”, “I shall be more than happy to put my shirt on and walk a straight line for you!”, “No, I’m afraid you are mistaken, Ole Dear Kind Sire, that bag of weed is for my son’s science project!”

Think of it this way, if your partner normally speaks like Tupac on normal days and one day he suddenly comes home talking like a Pope wouldn’t you find that disturbingly strange?

Knowing the signs of a lying partner can aid you in being one step ahead. Nonetheless, knowing if your partner is lying is just one step, it doesn’t end here yet.

The next part that you need to worry about is how to prove it, because just like what Tom Cruise’s character said in the movie, ‘A Few Good Men’, “It doesn’t matter what I believe in, it’s what I can prove!”

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Common Excuses Given By Cheaters

kajay — Sat, 07 May 2011 21:47:06 +0000

Here are some of the “Our Marriage was Already Over” type of excuses.

- Our marriage was over long before I cheated.
- We’re not like we used to be.
- I don’t love you anymore.
- We’ve never been right for each other.
- I feel trapped.
- I never wanted to get married.
- I don’t want to live like this.
- I love you like a sister/brother.
- I wanted to shake up our marriage and make it better.
- You deserve better.
- I thought you didn’t love me anymore.
- You left me before I left you.
- I was never in love with you.
- Our marriage was boring.

The It’s All your Fault Type of Cheating Excuses

Here are some of the “It’s All Your Fault” type of cheating excuses.

- I’ve told you for years why I was unhappy, but you decided to not do anything about it.
- You work too much.
- I thought you would change.
- You don’t listen to me.
- You aren’t good in bed.
- You don’t give me any attention.
- I’m tired of having to do everything around here.
- You don’t need me anymore.
- You put on too much weight.
- You cut your hair.
- You pressured me too much for sex so it wasn’t fun with you anymore.
- You were never really there for me when I needed you.

The It’s All My Fault Type of Cheating Excuses

Here are some of the “It’s All My Fault” type of cheating excuses.

- It has nothing to do with you.
- It’s not you, it’s me.
- I’m unhappy.
- I need some space.
- I really don’t know what I want to do with my life.
- I never cheated before but something just snapped.
- I want to stand on my own two feet.
- The other guys goaded me on and I didn’t want to look like a sissy.
- I have issues.
- I don’t why why I did it. It wasn’t planned.
- I didn’t expect to get caught.
- I’m having a mid-life crisis.
- I’m not happy. I haven’t been happy for years.
- I never meant to hurt you.
- It’s in my nature to cheat.
- It’s just a guy thing.

The Grass is Greener Type of Cheating Excuses

Here are some of the “Grass is Greener” type of cheating excuses.

- I need to have sex with others. I can’t go the rest of my life sleeping with just you.
- The sex is incredible. It was never that good with you.
- I want to start a rock band and I would be gone a lot. That wouldn’t be fair to you.
- It’s an addiction.
- I can’t help myself.
- It doesn’t mean anything.
- It just happened.
- He/She has an unhappy marriage, and I was filling an emotional void in his/her life.
- We were just friends.
- I was curious what sex with someone else would be like.

What You Do Need to Know

Here is what you do need to know in order to save your marriage after an affair.

- How long has the extramarital affair been going on?
- Has your spouse had more than one affair? If so, how many affairs?
- Was there a strong emotional bond in this affair?
- Is the affair over?

Do both of you want to save your marriage?

The thoughts that go through your mind when you suspect a partner is cheating are filled with anxiety. Discovering a spouse or significant other HAS cheated brings in a whole range of emotions – fear, hurt, pain (physical and mental), shock, anger, surprise and even thoughts of revenge.

Finding out if a partner is being unfaithful is a bit like looking behind a locked door in a haunted house.

Haven’t all the stories about this situation NEVER included someone just saying “No, this is too much. I’m walking away from this one.” There’s a part of you that doesn’t want to know. Why?

*If you don’t know, you can pretend it’s not happening, like the tree that falls in the forest that no one hears.
*If you don’t know, life won’t get messier than it already is.
*If you don’t know, then you can rationalize that there can’t be anything wrong. Denial means you never have to acknowledge that you and your partner most certainly, undeniably have a problem.

You Want to Know Because You Have to Know

As painful as it is for a doctor to tell a patient that he is seriously ill, the only chance that patient may have is learning the very worst.

Being ignorant of a disease has never helped anyone survive. It’s helped them die, but it has never helped them live.

For a patient to have a chance, to fight back, he has to look into the ugly face of the enemy and decide to win.

You cannot save yourself or your relationship by walking away from that haunted house door or by hiding under the bed so the doctor can’t find you.

If your partner is cheating, the only road ahead is going to be very rocky, whether you pretend the affair doesn’t exist or face it head on.

Ignoring the signs and your own instincts makes whatever happens next no easier.

Facing the Truth

Your partner has cheated. You’ve discovered it or they’ve admitted it. Many times a cheater will not own up to an affair unless they are caught, like a thief who never feels he is commiting a crime until the handcuffs get slapped on. Then, there’s no backing away from the reality. There are only the…

Excuses

Whether a spouse or lover is caught or decides to come clean on their own, the first question out of the mouth of the person who has been betrayed is not “Who?” but “Why?”

It doesn’t matter in those intense first moments between couples who is the third-party or how it happened. What matters is…What Went Wrong?

If you are the one asking and your partner is the one answering this question, don’t expect to get the straight facts. Instead (and this is especially true if a partner has been taken by surprise), the reason for the affair may be blamed on YOU.

*You weren’t there.
*You didn’t change.
*You don’t pay attention to me.
*You don’t love me.

The actions of your partner have somehow magically become your responsibility. Perhaps it never occurred to them that, if there was a problem, working it out together may have been a better solution.

Instead, your partner turned to someone else and absolved his behavior by blaming you. Don’t believe it for a minute.

Your Partner’s Affair Is NOT YOUR Fault

Sometimes cheating partners will agree with this statement wholeheartedly. The excuses then become…

*It’s not you…it’s me.

Don’t buy this either. The whole humble, shoulder-shrugging act that sends off the message “Oops! I made a mistake, but what can you expect from little old me?” is an admission that really takes zero responsibility. This time, your partner doesn’t blame YOU, but he’s not really blaming himself either – he’s blaming his NATURE.

*I couldn’t help myself.
*I didn’t realize it happened until after it happened.
*He/she swept me off my feet.
*I’m not a faithful kind of person.
*I need my space-that’s who I am.

Helplessness is no excuse, because no partner is helpless in the face of an affair. Having an affair is a decision.

The Answers You Really Want

Finding out the person you trusted most has betrayed that trust can be one of the most soul and gut-wrenching experiences of life.

There isn’t much comfort knowing that affairs are common, but there is some good news. Relationships can survive affairs.

It takes guts. It takes work and it takes both of you to want it, but it IS possible to get through an affair.

If your partner is cheating, all the cards must be put on the table. As hard as this confrontation can be, there are things you need to know if you want to move forward with your partner or without them:

*Is this the only affair your partner has ever had?
*How long has the affair been going on?
*Has the affair ended forever?
*Does your partner want to try again with you?
*Do YOU want to try again?

A partner who has an affair makes a choice to cheat. Affairs involve secrecy and lies and the excuses for affairs are no different, just a continuation of the lie.

A cheater has to take is to take full responsibility for what they’ve done. Even if they don’t want to end the affair, even if you decide to go your separate ways because of it – they must say and believe the truth.

They had an affair because they wanted to have an affair. Once that is clear, only then the two of you can decide what happens next.

Excuses are just that…excuses. They are not valid reasons. The deeper problem is inside your relationship. You have to open that scary door, BUT you don’t have to enter that room alone:

If you want help, click

http://bustacheatingpartner.com

If you suspect your partner is cheating, find out for sure.

Whatever is ahead may be difficult to face, but not facing it doesn’t make it go away. http://bustacheatingpartner.com

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Signs Of Cheating

kajay — Sat, 07 May 2011 19:43:17 +0000

When you are within a relationship it is indeed very difficult to differentiate what is cheating and what is an entirely normal behavior.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

Of course, it would be very convenient to believe the latter, however, you also do not want to be in a state of denial when dealing with the situation.

Therefore, just like looking at a piece of painting, you need to be able to step back and look at the bigger picture.

By evaluating certain signs that your partner is cheating on you, you can definitely save yourself some grief of feeling like an idiot when all the red flags have been surrounding you.

Here are some common sample scenarios that may help you save some face and get a clue.

1. Out of reach

When your partner says he or she will call you back and never did, then you try to reach him or her but the phone, by some unexplained phenomenon, gets turned off frequently, it means that something fishy may be going on. He or she may not want to be disturbed.

2. Long hours at work

Work is the most convenient justification and explanation to any circumstance where a cheating partner may not want to be asked too many questions about his whereabouts.

Many cheating partners find it easy to use work as a scapegoat because it’s easier and it earns them good impressions that they are hardworking people. Yes, hardworking, alright. Perhaps, working someone else even harder!

3. Something Fishy

When mutual friends act weirdly around you there is definitely a reason for that. If they change the topic when you enter the room, or seem uncomfortable when you are around, then chances are they may have been discussing the affair before you came in.

4. A new Facebook account

There’s only one reason why a committed partner would create a new Facebook account behind your back, this is to meet “Friends” he or she doesn’t want you to ask about.

Facebook, or any other online dating sites, is the easiest and most popular way to meet new love interests.

So if you bump into a familiar account with his or her photo on it and it says “single” on the Basic information box, then you can bet there’s truly some level of cheating involved.

5. Strange Phone Calls

If you pick up the ringing phone and nobody talks on the other line then it gets cut off, and this happens most of the time, there’s a big possibility that it’s the other party who is calling to see if your partner picks up.

They don’t bother to talk because if it’s not his or her voice they hear, all they have to just really do is to hang up. So don’t fool yourself into believing that it’s always a wrong number a few nights in a row at 11pm.

6. Heavily Tinted Car

If your partner suddenly has an urge to tint his windshield darker than usual and he or she has never had a problem with that car’s windows for a decade and a half now, then you might want to probe more about this idea.

Unless your partner is a newly-discovered celebrity or a member of the mafia clan, this idea may be a big cheating sign. Generally, cheaters do not want to inconvenience the other party by having him or her dock for 5 kilometers until they reach the local motel joint.

7. Stops wearing the wedding ring

The removal of the marriage band is the most classic symptom of a cheater. So do not even think twice about looking into the matter.

Not unless from the onset you and your partner have had the arrangement that the wearing of wedding rings is optional, then there’s really nothing to fear.

8. Buys new underwear

If your partner suddenly looks like he raided the nearest Calvin Klein outlet, or if she looks like she has more lingerie than a Victoria’s Secret model, then you better consider investigating. A newly discovered sex life outside of your bedroom can push your partner to impress the new partner by showing off new sets of underwear.

9. Sleeps with the cell phone hidden under the pillow

A cheater knows that his or her cell phone is his or her closest link to the other woman, or man. Therefore, cheaters are very careful in guarding these controversial little electronic gadgets with their lives.

If your partner used to just leave his or her phone scattered in the house, then suddenly begins to heavily safeguard it like an Alcatraz jail warden, then there’s something really fishy going on.

10. Talks in the other room

When your partner begins to secretively whisper when he or she is talking on the phone, or when he or she transfers to the other room when talking on the phone, then it is a great indication that he or she doesn’t want you to hear the conversation.

Perhaps your partner is trying to pacify his or her other love interest for not showing up the other day when you asked him to accompany you to the grocery store, or that he or she is trying to explain why he or she couldn’t get out of the house as of the moment.

11. Spick and span inbox

If you are used to your partner being a very sloppy and messy email inbox keeper then you suddenly discover it to be as clean as a housekeeper’s house, chances are he or she has been deleting the things they don’t want you to see.

If you have had access to his or her inbox then you might as well check the trash items then, if your partner careful, you may discover some useful items there.

12. A sudden facial glow

According to studies, when a person is having more sex than he or she is used to, physical indicators will definitely show.

A facial glow, a change of bodily scent, a firmer and more toned gluteal area (buttocks) and a more developed chest, for women. This is due to the hormones being produced more than usual.

13. Stops having sex

The ultimate cheating giveaway is when your partner stops having sex or suddenly rarely gets physically involved with you. The reason for this is guilt.

Sex is the ultimate expression of emotional feelings in a romantic relationship and if there is any change in the quality, length, time and interval of your sexual intimacy than what used to be normal, then perhaps it can be safe to consider that your partner has some emotional detachment from you, predisposed by an affair.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Marital Affairs

kajay — Sat, 07 May 2011 19:40:25 +0000

People have a misconception that affairs are about lustful sexual encounters. Actually, they are not! Sex is only the adverse effect of inner, repressed feelings.

So what makes cheating so emotional? Rage, fear, guilt, betrayal and self pity are just a few of these mixed, strong and intense emotions that both the cheater and victimized spouse experience.

Why do they feel so disturbing to those who experience them?

How does the feeling differ from the emotion from being cheated in a business deal by your trusted CEO?

Or how does it vary from the rage you feel towards a boss who stole your ideas?

Certainly, there are many forms of cheating but why does the pain in a marital affair feel so much worse?

This is because in marriage there is a unique form of trust involved. It’s not just a common trust that you give away to your friends, but a trust that involves your heart, mind and soul.

This trust is something that you place highly enough that you have put yourself in front of your family and friends, having to stand up for this trust.

It is the pain of humiliation, betrayal, deception added with the lost of self esteem that makes the situation so much worse. A marital affair exemplifies the violation of a sacred trust between two people who have made a commitment to each other.

Trust is an entity that, when lost, is hard to replace. If only we can replace our cheating husbands or wives the following day then marital affairs wouldn’t be so bad. But we all know that things just do not work out that way.

How convenient would it be to just swallow a pill one day and everything will be back to normal the next day! Unfortunately, the trauma of a marital affair can be irreversible. It can cost a person’s sanity, peace of mind and even health.

Also, a cheating affair not only impairs the relationship between the husband and wife but it also damages the relationship of family members and mutual friends.

In cases where the mutual friend happens to know that one person in the marriage is cheating on the other, then it would mean that he or she too was an accomplice to hiding the truth.

Just because a person never lied to your face, it doesn’t discount the fact that they’ve omitted to tell you the truth. Lying and the sin of omission are cousins.

Therefore, it is not surprising that the victimized spouse will also harbor feelings of being betrayed by the “accomplice”- making the already fragile recovery even more difficult.

When the shock subsides, the reality sinks in. The focus leads to the sexual acts. This is where the imagination can stifle one’s ability to confront the real situation.

Most victims of cheating partners become fixated on the sexual nature of an affair, not on the emotional. The truth is, more emphasis must be focused on the latter.

Setting of Expectations: Perhaps the reason for cheating is that the expectations in the relationship were not clearly set from the start. The husband, for instance, never told the wife that she was expected to quit her job when the firstborn arrives.

Then she begins to resent him for being insensitive to her own decisions and preferences. But afraid to be perceived as a “bad mother” she keeps it all to herself all those years until she, one day, meets a nonjudgmental, sensitive guy in a PTA meeting.

She becomes more alive, hopeful and slowly develops an emotional connection with this person, thus, the beginning of their romantic affair.

If only she was honest and open about how she really felt about quitting her job to her husband, then they would have made a few adjustments and met halfway.

And if only he was sensitive enough to confide in her with his plans then she wouldn’t have had to feel that way in the first place.

This is where effective communication comes in. Communication is the fuel in a well-oiled marriage.

Reckless behavior: People suffering from advanced cases of psychological disorders such as alcoholism, drug addictions, mania or bipolar disorders may lead themselves into a frenzy by indulging themselves with too much pleasure.

Case in point, a drunken night spent in Vegas can pretty much impair one’s superego to the point of not knowing right from wrong, which is another term for stupidity.

Erratic, careless behaviors can lead to serious and damaging situations like an affair. If one is not careful he or she can wake up one morning next to someone who isn’t his or her spouse.

This is why it is always best to take extra precaution by inviting your partner along when you decide to drink, get wasted and have fun in clubs.

Also keep your partner posted when it comes to the places you go to and the people you are with. Leave your friends’ phone numbers in case he or she can’t get a hold of you. Make sure that your spouse has access to your whereabouts and activities.

Unresolved Previous Affair: Believe it or not but the most motivating factor in cheating on a spouse is when one does it for vengeance.

An eye for an eye as what they say. Wives who suffered from the blow of a cheating husband may feel insecure and in the quest to relinquish their lost power over the marriage, may find themselves cheating on their husbands as well. This only means that they have not forgiven their spouses.

The mental and emotional satisfaction sought from revenge can initially feel empowering, but this is only temporary. Just like any cheater they too will experience the feelings of guilt in the long run.

It doesn’t matter if your spouse gave you a hard time in the past, the guilt and remorse in a cheater’s heart is as burdensome to the mind as a coronary artery surgical procedure.

In the end, it is really not worth it mainly because of the mental anguish that it can cause you.

The effects of cheating can be devastating and there are no quick and easy Band Aid strips to cover up the wounds and make the pain go away.

Nonetheless, if two people are willing and driven, then patience, time, honesty and professional help can intervene, making it possible for the wounds to heal and the scars to fade.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Why Women Cheat? Reasons Why Women Cheat

kajay — Sat, 07 May 2011 19:35:59 +0000

Why Women Cheat

When it comes to the reasons of infidelity people may think that cheating women are far more different than cheating men. Actually the case proves the same.

They just have a different form of expression and certain reasons root from different psychological places.

In order to handle the situation where are cheating woman is involved it is of great importance to understand their nature and how these play a vital role in a woman’s day-to-day emotional and psychosexual encounters.

Women are insecure beings as well. They want constant reassurance that they are still wanted by their men especially in the looks department.

This is the reason why they spend so much money on changing their hair. If it’s brunette, they dye it platinum blonde, then next month it miraculously turns red.

If they naturally have straight hair they spend so much time with their curling irons, and if it’s naturally curly, they iron it straight for hours and hours.

Women like to change their appearance because they want to feel wanted by their man. They want to surprise their partners with variety and if they do not get the satisfaction of a man noticing these changes, they immediately take it out on their self image.

Women want the same amount of appreciation for their beauty just as much as men crave appreciation for their provisions. If you are not making her feel that special way, she could seek it elsewhere.

Sex is also a need for women. Unfortunately, in some cases, this social understatement leads some women go through a point of emotional desperation, and a series of sexual repressions.

Since society has portrayed women to be sexually modest and expects them to be prim and proper at all times, women tend to become more embarrassed of their sexuality in front of their partners.

They are afraid to taint their husbands’ or boyfriends’ immaculate view of them, so they displace the hidden unexpressed bestial sexuality with someone else. Someone they don’t really care about. They are afraid to be judged by the men they love.

They think that if they show their wild sides they will lose their man’s respect and approval. They may be a lady with their husbands or boyfriends but they can be a freak in the sheets with their other lovers.

In a case like this, these are the types of women who are either sexually deprived by their men, who do not give enough attention, satisfaction and stimulation in bed, or those who are in a relationship that lacks constant communication.

What these women really just need is to be able to tell their partners how they want to be pleased. Keep the lines of communication open and she’ll be more likely to talk to you about what’s going on instead of spilling her guts to a stranger in the night.

Sex can be an instantly boost to a woman’s self esteem.

Making women feel sexier, more beautiful and more loved. If your wife or girlfriend has self-esteem issues, it doesn’t mean she’s automatically going to cheat on you, nor do you need to take it out on yourself if she does. It’s not your fault.

What you just need to do is to reassure her with your love.

Pay attention to her needs and compliment her often. Make sure she feels that you are sincerely going to be there even if she’ll look like a whale 5 years down the road. Besides, a little white lie never hurt anybody!

For women trust in a romantic relationship is synonymous to a one billion business contract with Donald Trump. If you break her trust, you break her heart.

There’s nothing scarier than a woman whose heart just got broken. Her bellowing rage can send her to do things that can hit you where it hurts. Some stupid, stupid things like cheating.

This is not to justify that it’s okay for women to cheat on you after you broke her trust, but the point here is that men should not tap into women’s bad side because it is common knowledge that a cheating woman is more damaging to the ego than a cheating man.

So it doesn’t matter if you slept with her best friend, or busted all of your life savings at a poker night with the Yakuza clan, a woman’s broken trust can push open Pandora’s box.

Instead of breaking up with their boyfriends some women find it easier to cheat. This is because they honestly don’t want to deal with the drama of explaining what really bothers them. They want a convenient way out, any way out just to get rid of you.

She knows that giving a man a series of second chances to “work things out” actually no longer works out for her. She wants to create a reason to just end it.

This usually happens when a woman has reached her boiling point. A point where she knows there’s no hope for the relationship to improve, no matter how often she nags to you about spending more time with her or how much she tries to get your attention away from your friends on weekends.

Not all women who have reached their limit are inevitably going to cheat, but men should also take this factor into consideration.

There’s a common knowledge that a woman who nags still, in the deepest core of her heart, believes that there is room for improvement in the relationship- that’s why she still bothers.

You should be concerned when a woman suddenly just stops nagging. It means she’s given up on you. Beware! The next course of her actions can possibly be very detrimental.

If you have it all: the two-storey mansion, a sports car and a minivan, membership to the most prestigious country club in town, a rest house in the Hamptons, a Golden Retriever and two kids, a boy and a girl- on the outside. But on the inside, the relationship is lacking the one thing women want most: intimacy.

Intimacy is different from sexual intercourse. It’s the connection you two have when you are kissing, touching, cuddling, caressing, playing silly childish games in bed like tickling and even pillow talking.

Being intimate to a woman is like catnip to a kitten. It drives them crazy, good crazy. Affection is their aphrodisiac and they could seek it elsewhere if they are not getting it at home.

Even a simple foot massage when she comes home from work, a long torrid kiss in the car before she gets off to the super market or a simple touching of her hips when she’s washing the dishes can build a woman’s closeness with you and can definitely create a deep connection that can save a man his fragile ego.

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Why Men Cheat? Reasons Why Men Cheat

kajay — Sat, 07 May 2011 19:34:16 +0000

According to a survey 92 percent of cheating men said that they cheat because of emotional disconnection.

People would think that men cheat because of the sex but what they do not realize is that sex, being a medium of emotional transmission into a physical expression, is just as important to men as affection is important to women.

Men are also emotional beings. The problem is that society has painted them in a way that doesn’t make them look like that. Society plays a heavy role in defining men.

Think about it, the media places a big misconception on men that they become “macho” when they have more than just one woman.

Almost to the point where it connotes that the more women a man can have, the more powerful he becomes- or that men have the biological right to cheat mainly because he has the penis.

They do not have to worry about being pregnant or checking in with their monthly OB-GYN visits. The media portrays them as the alpha dogs and that women are merely dispensable sexual objects.

We are mislead into believing that men are these lustful, animalistic gods who have no sense of self control, remorse and conscience to decipher what’s right from wrong when it comes to sex.

This misconception is confusing and can basically mislead us from the truth. Men are just as emotional as women, but they simply displace their emotions in different, socially-acceptable ways.

Appreciation- Most men who cheat feel under-appreciated by their partners. With daily worries like bills, children and chores, couples drift away from appreciating one another.

The other woman often makes the man feel better- making them feel different, appreciated and admired. Men look strong, powerful and capable.

But on the inside, they’re insecure like everybody else. They’re looking for somebody to build them up to make them feel valued.

Men have a winning mentality. Just think about how men watch their favorite sports teams on television. They love to win. As long as they’re in the game, even to the very end, they’ll watch. Once it’s a blowout and they know their team can’t win, the television goes off.

Now they might not have been great guys to live with but if you want to preserve your relationship make them feel like they’re winning with the things that they do for you. It doesn’t matter how small it is, appreciation will save your man from looking at an affair.

Appearance vs Attention- 88 percent of men surveyed in a study said that the other women were no better looking than their own wives or girlfriends.

This only proves that there are other things aside from physical looks that can drive a man to cheat. Attention is one of them.

Most men cheat because their wives or girlfriends stop paying attention to them. They put a very strong hold on this and if they can’t find it in your home or apartment, they come looking for it someplace else.

The other woman makes them feel secure. They feel like they can be themselves. They can talk more, express more and the listening ear is always available when they need to share their stories.

It surprises them how someone else can be so interested in their work, their childhood, their plans and their dreams. And men put a high price on this!

Anybody, no matter how you look, can be admiring, open and give you that extra little pump and hang on to every one of your words. So instead of spending too much extra time in the office, why not spend some quality time listening to your partner.

Power. A common mistake of working power women is when they make the men feel emasculated by rubbing to their faces that they have higher incomes.

This can make the guy feel criticized and again, under-appreciated. Making them lose their sense of power in a relationship.

According to Sherry Argov, in the book “Why Men Marry Bitches”, “Power is just as intoxicating to men as romance is intoxicating for women”.

Once they feel vulnerable the men will try to regain the lost power by cheating with a woman, who, as you guess it, usually works as a waitress in TGI Fridays!

So be extra careful in how you appear to your partner when you have a high powered career.

Although men may look supportive and proud, they do have a certain form of insecurity when it comes to providing food on the table or paying for dinners.

It is not to say that the woman should feel sorry for being more successful than he is, or that she should just quit her job or ask to be demoted just to caress his ego.

It’s more on how you handle yourself tactfully and sensitively when you talk about your job, your paycheck, your FICO score, your investments or your purchases.

Modesty is the important thing here. Don’t criticize his job or his income either. Make sure that you let him know that you’re rooting for him, not competing against him.

Passion. Most couples stop going out on dates when the honeymoon stage is over. 4 years into marriage and it’s all about microwavable TV dinners and talking about bills.

The spice has been replaced by monotony. Therefore, once in a while you should go out to your favorite restaurant, go to the movies (not rent a DVD) and watch a flick you both enjoy.

Activities, outside of the routine living at home, are the things that get the juice flowing in a relationship. Many couples stop dating after marriage or after a long period of time, then the woman wonders why the man has ran away with another woman.

This is because men, in general, like fun and outgoing women. They like a woman who laughs more and knows how to have a good time.

Men are like children and if you’re not going to be a fun playmate, they will find the next girl in the neighborhood to play with. If you’re such a drag chances are he’ll resent you for it.

A man needs to be constantly stimulated to maintain his attention. Otherwise, he will take it out on himself and feel unappreciated and taken for granted.

He wants to know that you can still be entertained by his company, that he can still make you laugh and be interested in his character.

Don’t stop the humor because you’re already busy with important priorities. Include recreation in your budget and schedule.

Make sex more interesting by buying a new pair of sexy lingerie. Experiment in bed. The key here is that you need to cover all the aspects of your life together keep him hooked and interested in only you.

This is not to say that you should be a doormat and become his own private entertainer, like a court jester juggling tricks for the king all day long.

The mere purpose of this is to keep the fire burning, the engines running and the steam flowing. Remember, men are just as passionate as women.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Is He Cheating?

kajay — Sat, 07 May 2011 19:31:24 +0000

Whilst women are blessed with the gift of intuition, most men are skilled in the ability to lie. According to behavioral psychology this is because men are more logical by nature.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

It is easier for them to remove themselves from their feelings in exchange for the sense of reasoning.

Making them more believable when they are lying or making up excuses to cover up their wrongdoings, hence, according to statistics more men cheat in the relationships than women.

In order for women to understand the workings of a cheating man they should prepare themselves in distinguishing the complexities of a cheater at work.

In the initial stages of his affair, a man is bound to have guilty feelings in his mind. So, he suddenly becomes more responsive to fulfilling the needs and requirements of his partner.

If your man has started showing unnecessary attention towards you by buying you a dozen roses during non-special occasions, or getting you expensive jewelry as a present when he used to be very frugal about gift giving then you do have reasons to suspect that he is on his way to have an affair.

In Psychology this defense mechanism is called “undoing”. When a man tries to reduce his guilt feelings by giving you costly gifts you can definitely equate that the grander the gift, the bigger the guilt.

If you observe your partner closely, then you will surely stumble upon certain changes in his behavior and attitude. His changes in demeanor can tell you that there’s something going on with him that he’s not telling you.

For example, if he used to come home and kiss you on the lips for 5 seconds (with a light tongue action), then slowly, over time, a cheating man will eventually awkwardly head for your cheeks or forehead instead, with a cheap smack or peck.

Remember it’s usually the small things that can give them away.

As his affair grows, you turn into a nauseating object in his eyes. He will eventually find ways on how to pick up a fight with you to give him a reason to walk out. These sorts of actions are nothing but creating chances to meet up with the other woman.

When he is deeply engaged with his other relationship he will talk about the probability of ending yours. He will find flaws and faults in your relationship.

Leading the conversation to how you two should have never happened, or that your relationship, commitments or marriage was a mistake from the beginning.

He will find aspects of your life that will make you an unfit partner. These are just the classic lines that men use to discourage the relationship.

When you discuss your future, he will be very pessimistic and find reasons on why you two will not work out in the long run.

A cheating man will also have frequent temper tantrums when he is with you.

His moods will be unpredictable and each time gets a chance to leave your house he will appear gleeful and excited and when he comes back home he’ll have the same resentful look on his face like as if he’s on death row.

All the likings and preferences of your spouse or partner are going through a change.

Say, before he enjoys inviting your friends for a backyard barbeque, now, he spends more time washing his car and painting it with a drastic colored scheme like fire red or metallic violet.

His choice of movies and music will not be the same anymore. Even his choice of clothing will change.

If he used to wear a pair of road kill pants, a baseball cap and worn out shirt when he goes out to the downtown hardware, this time he’ll pay more attention to the partitions of his gel-soaked hair, how his pants flair to the sides and how the color of his shirt could make him look younger.

Also if things are still not being noticed your partner will try to test the waters by criticizing you at every possible instance.

Your traits that once made him infatuated no longer appeals to him. He becomes less appreciative of your works and actions. He’ll point out past issues you had and bring up your past relationships.

He will even be more accusatory when it comes how you interact with your guy friends. He will appear to be distrustful and will lack interest in getting to know the truth.

His insecurities seep out from the guilt he is having. The cumbersome pressure of keeping secrets will begin to set inside of him.

In the initial years of your relationship he used to tell you how much he loves you a few times in a day. But, this time he has stopped saying anything about how he feels.

He is guarded and wants to keep things to himself. He doesn’t tell you what’s going on in his current life at the office, or his day to day plans because chances are he doesn’t want to repeat what he just told someone else when they were pillow talking. A cheating man tells more things about himself to his mistress.

He feels like the mistress is the shoulder to cry on, the understanding and arms-wide-open emotional shock absorber.

He vents more to the other woman than to the wife or the long term girlfriend because he views the wife or girlfriend as an authority figure that he needs to carefully walk on eggshells around.

But with the mistress, it is sky’s the limit. He will tell her everything because he views the mistress as someone who has no boundaries and inhibitions.

Making love has become a thing of the past. Even if it happens, he acts just robotically in the bed. His erections take a while than usual.

Stimulation becomes difficult for him. While having sex, he looks quite indifferent and preoccupied with other thoughts and the sex no longer last for more than 8 minutes.

Foreplay is lesser and he seems like as if he’s not really into it. Then after sex, he heads straight to the bathroom or roll over to the other side of the bed to sleep.

Your conversations in bed will be very monotonous and he won’t talk that much. He seems reserved and spaced out. At this time, he is thinking about the other woman and how he also somehow feels like he’s cheating on her.

When you are trying to call him over the phone, his phone is either switched off or out of reach. And this is occurring every day. Sometimes, his mobile phone is going on ringing and he won’t pick up. Then you get a text message with a flimsy excuse like running out of battery power or not being able to hear the phone ring.

Also another way to know if he’s cheating on you is when you ask him where he was and his answer is different from the satellite tracking system that you ran just using your phones.

If he tells you he was at his best friend’s house then you later discovered that his best friend has been out on vacation in Maui for a few weeks now, then there’s certainly a good reason to suspect that he’s hiding his whereabouts from you.

When certain stories do not match and he is being too defensive when he’s explaining then you can get a clue that he’s being disloyal.

And lastly if you want to investigate on his affairs do not, by in any way, consult his best friend because men have a secret code of brotherhood to, at all times, protect and look after each other when it comes to cheating on their wives or girlfriends. So don’t even bother bribing his hiking buddy for Exhibit A evidence.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Infidelity in Marriage- How And Why Does It Happen?

kajay — Sat, 07 May 2011 19:28:06 +0000

There are various reasons why married couples commit infidelity, and usually, these reasons are commonly the things that people take for granted. It’s the small things that count, as the saying goes.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

What people miss are the little things that provoke a man or a woman to sleep with somebody else. To better understand the truth behind reasons for marital affairs and how to salvage yours, here are a few ideas that can help.

1. Lack of sexual surprise!

Does your marriage suffer from sexual boredom? Is it always the same position in bed?

Do you think that if you videotape your sexual encounters and give a narrative report you’ll give out a predictable play-by-play action almost to the point where you can sound like a weather forecaster instead of a sports commentator?

“The weather in the northern part of my face is dry, with a little light storm happening down south.

We’ll have a little missionary monsoon followed by a woman-on-top explosion just as expected”. If the answer to any one of these questions is yes then your marriage is prone to an affair.

What you can do is spice up the lovemaking with some sexual experiments. Unleash the passion by surprising your mate with aroma candles and a relaxing pre-sex massage tonight, then tomorrow night you can change it by going a bit dirty with whipped cream and chocolate fudge.

Use your imagination to show how much fun lovemaking can be in your marriage.

For fun, you can also check-in at a motel down the street and make love like as if it’s an illicit affair in a James Bond movie. A little role play never hurt anybody.

2. According to Gary Neuman, a psychologist and author of the book, “Why Men Cheat”, aside from a lack of sexual stimulation in your bedroom another reason that men cheat is not only the quality of the marital sex but also the frequency.

“Sex for men is an emotional act, and a woman initiating sex is “like getting flowers and him washing the dishes for us (women).”

Therefore, men, who usually feel like they need to build a monument for their wives just to get laid, will eventually feel an emotional disconnection at some point.

The same is true for women. Women who withhold sex to “punish” their partners for little things that disappointed them during the day will eventually lose their men’s fidelity.

They are actually defeating the purpose by cutting off their mate’s emotional desire. Men will eventually resent their wives if sex is going to be a lockdown each time they forget to take out the garbage.

3. Another powerful reason why people cheat in their marriages is the constant feeling of lack of appreciation for efforts made.

It doesn’t matter how simple they are, whether you bought your wife a Bugatti or you mowed the lawn for her all summer long, a lack of gratitude can be a big blow for your ego. The same goes for women.

If they feel like their efforts in taking care of the children are not reciprocated by a ‘Thank You’, then the emotional security goes out the window.

Women need to be complimented for their looks. They want to be reassured. As long as they know that they are still gorgeous to the eyes of the man they love, then they will keep on taking care of themselves and feel good about being his wife.

If a man acts like he’s embarrassed to be seen with his wife then this can be a big blow to a woman’s ego.

So keep complimenting her as much as you can. Kiss her on the neck when you come home from work, even if she smells like moldy sweat from cleaning up your dirty garage.

Also let your man know how much you get turned on by a hard working man the next time he hands you his monthly paycheck. Make each other feel wanted and appreciated and you’ll stay loyal together.

4. Workaholic spouses are more prone to be cheated on than those who come home to dinner on time. The intensity of work can lead to neglect in a relationship.

If you work late hours and your wife is left at home, alone and lonely, most of the time during the day, then do not be surprised if one day you find your pool boy swimming in your bed.

The same thing can happen to a workaholic wife, if she keeps coming home to bed too tired to have sex with her husband then it can ruin their emotional connection.

If you say that you’re working late for the sake of your marriage’s financial security then you must learn to realize that in any marriage time is just as important and precious as money.

Think about it. What will you do with your earnings if you don’t even have any time to spend it on that long awaited vacation to the Bahamas?

5. Mid-life crisis is also a factor for a cheating spouse.

Notice how some guys in their 50’s would tend to regress into a younger version of themselves? Grandpa starts to ditch his overhauls and suspenders in exchange for leather jackets and alligator boots.

Grandma starts acting funny by being extra flirty with young studs. Although it may seem harmless, these expressions of wanting to feel young can be a potential to seeking the company of much younger romantic partners.

As sick and gross as it may sound a mid-life crisis is just as tough for a marriage as any other challenge.

A few married men in their forties even date 20-something chicks they meet in bars, while they were grooving and raving on the dance floor like as if they were still on spring break. And ever heard of the word MILF or cougar?

That can be someone else’s wife dating young teenage boys. Some couples cheat because they want to escape from their mid-life crisis.

Feeling like as if time is no longer their luxury, they are missing out on life and they want to make the most out of living even to the point of hurting their partners.

People who regress by cheating usually have issues with missing out on themselves during their younger years.

They probably spent so much time in med school in their 20’s so they naturally missed out on the whole dating scenario at the time that they should have.

Or they probably started parenthood too early when they should have been just “normal” teenagers back then.

There are many healthy ways to deal with regression, such as accompanying your spouse to do the things he or she would like to do because there’s a saying “If you cannot beat them, then you might as well join them”.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Emotional Cheating

kajay — Sat, 07 May 2011 19:25:15 +0000

All acts of adultery or infidelity begin with emotional cheating. Although the act of cheating or sex is not involved yet, the intent to cheat can be just as devastating as a sexual affair.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

Nurturing romantic thoughts of another lover aside from your spouse is, in itself, the best definition of emotional cheating.

In the book “The Road Less Travelled” by Dr. M. Scott-Peck the author explains this process as “cathexis”- the projection of love or deep emotional feelings to another person.

Cathexis is the beginning of falling in love, which is innate in all human beings, married or not, without exception.

Since this psychological phenomenon is usually a subconscious behavior, how do you know then if you are already guilty of emotional cheating?

How can you tell the difference between a brotherly love for your best friend and a romantic attraction?

How do you categorize an infinite unconditional platonic love for your co worker versus having an unconscious sexual desire?

Freud described the conscious and subconscious aspects of the mind to be synonymous with an iceberg.

The exposed part, the part of the glacier that you see on the surface is the conscious part of the mind, whereas, beneath the surface lies a bigger and more complex part which is the subconscious mind.

This is the part where you should be afraid of, not what’s on the surface. It’s very tricky. Sometimes our mind plays tricks on us and the next thing you know you’re spooning with your wife’s yoga instructor.

Why do these things happen? It’s not because she seduced you with her Bikram poses and it’s only your animalistic right to conquer women who lure men. No, there’s more to that.

It’s because you are developing emotional feelings towards the person as you interact with her, slowly, along the way.

So before any other emotional cheating develops everyone has to be aware of how to tell if he or she is already on the brink of crossing the line.

When sexual fantasies about your friend become a habit and preoccupation it is a number one sign of emotional cheating.

Daydreaming is a normal defense mechanism when a current relationship is threatened. It becomes an emotional cheating if it transforms itself into a constant routine in your head, with the same third person over and over.

Married couples often daydream about other people aside from their partners. It’s normal. What determines the line is when it’s the same person, the person you’re constantly spending time with.

If you find yourself anticipating and longing for the company of your friend more than your spouse’s then you need to be afraid.

You’re beginning to project inappropriate feelings for someone else. And when in a group, you wish that everyone else leaves so you’ll have more alone time with your “friend” that’s trouble right there. Also when he or she goes to another room you take that opportunity to spend time alone with him or her.

Withdrawing from the spouse is also a sign of going to the other side of marriage- infidelity.

Although, on the outside people see you two physically living under one roof 24/7, sharing the same bills at home, watching your daughter’s ballet recital unfailingly each year and sitting right next to each other at your parent’s golden wedding anniversary, it doesn’t necessarily warrant you to be in a healthy marital relationship.

What counts is what’s going on inside you. If you harbor ill feelings toward your spouse and are not letting these grudges and resentments go for countless years now, then that’s also called emotional cheating. A marriage is supposed to be a holistic loving and open relationship, inside and out.

You can also tell if you are forming an emotional affair for a friend when you become very defensive when your spouse asks you about him or her.

You think that your wife is being paranoid when she points out a nice picture of you two in a corporate outing, or you snap at your husband for asking where you have been when you were just out with your “friend”.

Being defensive, either by anger or reaction-formation (doing the exact opposite of what you deeply feel) is an indicator that you’re trying to tell your spouse what you should have been telling yourself.

According to a survey most cheating men opt to share their thoughts, feelings, and problems with their mistresses instead of their spouses. This is because they know that they will not be held liable for anything they say.

Mistresses do not have the same power as the wife. The same thing goes for cheating wives. They express their sexuality more with their lovers than with their husbands. They have no inhibitions when in the presence of the third party.

This is how emotional cheating also begins.

When you find yourself sharing intimate stories about yourself that you should have been telling your partner about, and if you notice how sharing problems with your “friend” seems easier for you, then something is wrong with your marriage.

A marriage is supposedly a place of security for two people. It should not feel like a burden to spend time with your partner.

It doesn’t even matter what you have to say, whether you tell your spouse about your drug addictions when you were in med school, a weird-looking mole near your anus or even about how you witnessed a pile up on I-35 this morning on your way to work, as long as you feel comfortable and non-threatened with communicating then everything should be A-okay.

Gift giving can also be a sign of emotional cheating. If you find yourself spending more gifts for your “friend” than your spouse, or if you give him or her gifts on days when there’s no real special occasion whatsoever, for no reason at all, then you’re screwed. Also, be careful with your gift selections.

Personal items such as a pair of underwear, sex toys, inappropriate adult magazines, erotic candles, heart-shaped figurines, cuddly stuffed animals and expensive rings with diamonds can be misinterpreted, even if it’s just for practical joke purposes.

Joking about sex or love isn’t really joking, there’s a level of truth in them. People use jokes so as not to feel vulnerable about what they subconsciously really want to say.

Last, but not the least, is when you keep your friendship hidden from your spouse. This stems from the paranoia that is associated with being caught in the emotional cheating.

There’s a saying, “Less talk, less mistakes” and this applies to an affair too. You’d rather not talk about that special co-worker because it’s easier to skip that part than having to explain.

And if you do explain, you also don’t want to have to watch your words or keep a straight, innocent-looking poker face when your autonomic nervous system is kicking your ass by pumping increasing blood supply to your sweaty face, trembling voice and spastic hands.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Emotional Affair 101

kajay — Sat, 07 May 2011 19:23:04 +0000

What is emotional affair?

How is it different from just plain friendship with the opposite sex?

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

How can we differentiate emotional affair from just a genuinely honest and non-malicious interaction with our co workers, friends or acquaintances?

What is the thin red line that separates a platonic relationship from an affair? These are just a few questions that people ask when it comes to understanding the ins and outs of cheating.

First stop, we need to define what an emotional affair is from cheating. Emotional affair does not necessarily mean that your partner is already having sex with the other person.

However, this is only the gateway to most known cases of infidelity.

Although, having emotional attachments to another person does not warrant anyone to be breaking the law in any state or country, it is a highly dangerous ground that can ultimately result to cheating when left unresolved.

No one ever got to jail because of developing romantic feelings for another person other than your wife or husband but if you act on these feelings in sexual ways it can cost you a night behind bars, bail money and an expensive visit to your attorney.

Emotional affairs play more closely to the word ‘intent’.

As every spiritual teacher would suggest that all action begins from the mind, developing thoughts about another person in a sexual or romantic notion is the beginning of cheating. An emotional affair generally starts innocently as a friendship.

If a person invests emotional energy and time with another person other than the spouse or committed relationship it creates a strong emotional bond which can greatly impact the intimacy of an existing relationship.

Let’s paint the picture, shall we?

Say that a male boss, who is already married, decides to spend more time with his female assistant in the office.

They work big projects on very long hours, travel thrice a week to many different sites side-by-side in a small constricted airplane with seats the sizes of public toilets, stay up late in the office hours after every person in the entire 50-storey building has gone home.

The time and amount of energy they spend with each other inevitably develops a sense of close partnership and bonding.

They become dependent on one another and eventually begin to communicate in ways that show deep concern, care and appreciation for each other.

Emotional affair usually begins with the change in the way they address each other. From a professional to a more personal then eventually to a more playful way of calling each other.

Mr. Smith becomes Ronald, and Miss Harper, over time, changes to Ashley.

A sense of formality is lost because the close bond begins to make them feel uncomfortable to be less personable to each other. In time then Ronald becomes “Ron” and Ashley becomes “Ash”. They begin calling each other with nicknames.

As time goes by their newly-discovered friendship allows them to freely exercise their right to be more creative and imaginative.

Since they see that the other person do not mind to be called by their nicknames, why not make things interesting and transform them into pet names, usually derived from jokes or commonly shared circumstances that they find endearing such as “Snore man” or “Ketchup Queen”.

They later on feel the need to meet each other even on non- working days because they feel like they have a responsibility towards the tasks on hand and to each other.

No one wants to disappoint the other, just like in any partnership. They form a team and develop a sudden urge to protect one another at all costs.

Conversations then lead to more personal matters. On certain hard days the pressure becomes unbearable that Ron begins to share his daily mundane issues at home when he should have been consulting his wife about them.

Ash on the other hand, preconditioned to be by his side due to the intense working relationship they have formed, begins to feel like she should do something about it, to “protect” Ron from having such feelings of grief, or just plain irritability and discomfort.

They hold each other’s hand through the process. She becomes more important and valuable to him, an asset which he can no longer let go of. He, in turn, becomes a person that she needs to rescue.

Canceling her dates on the weekends she, instead, of sits on a chair right next to him in a nice fine dining restaurant, discussing his inner child and how he used to be a hippie back in college. Thus a well-functioning, co-dependent relationship develops.

The former platonic friendship can begin to form a strong emotional bond. While there are people who believe that an emotional affair is harmless, most marriage counselors look at an emotional affair as cheating without having sex. Emotional affairs are often the source of full blown sexual infidelity.

For some individuals, the most hurtful and painful consequences of an emotional affair is the sense of being deceived, betrayed, and lied to even if there is no sex involved.

A frequent touching, holding or expressing of affection between two members of the opposite sex can develop certain romantic feelings over time.

Being strongly attracted to a close friend whom you interact with constantly can turn into an emotional affair.

Any form of intent, thought, emotion or feeling that you nurture within your spirit can be considered cheating because the fact that you lacked the intent to extinguish the build-up of these malicious feelings means that you are a willing party.

An emotional affair is when a person also receives emotional support and companionship from the new relationship.

In an emotional affair, a person feels closer to the third party as opposed to the existing romantic relationship, and may experience heightening sexual tension.

A partner who is engaging with a third person does not often feel the guilt of an emotional affair because sex isn’t involved, instead, the spouse or other person in their committed relationship experience the pain and hurt because it is just as damaging as a sexual affair.

A good way to determine the difference between a platonic friendship and an emotional affair is when an interaction with the third party is being kept a secret.

Another determinant is when the persons in the emotional affair feel a sexual interest or attraction toward each other, whether or not they blatantly acknowledge such magnetism.

There are many ways that differentiate certain relationships and as much as people are afraid to label their relationship with the people they interact with, they also need to acknowledge the importance of recognizing and highlighting the line the separates each category for the sake of clarity and self honesty.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Cheating Spouse

kajay — Sat, 07 May 2011 19:20:07 +0000

There’s a lot at stake when it comes to a cheating spouse than to a cheating lover. First stop is the children’s welfare.

The children are the direct victims of a cheating husband or wife and can usually impact them more than the victimized spouse. Second, are the in-laws.

What would they say if they find out that they gave their daughter or son away to a complete, ruthless cheating jerk?

In marriages where the in-laws are pretty much heavily involved in the couple’s life, the situation can definitely be aggravated by the pain and grief of extended family members.

Money is also another issue when there is cheating in a marital relationship. Since, from a legal standpoint, everything in most marriages is conjugal property.

How much you spend on your affair can definitely affect the financial status of your spouse. You are not only hurting him or her emotionally but also financially.

If your partner decides to spend money to give flowers to his or her partner that means 20 bucks less of this weeks’ expected family budget.

And if you calculate all the money being spent to keep the affair hidden that can lead to a serious amount of conjugal money being spent on remote hotel rooms on the other side of town, gas, birth control, gift deliveries and miscellaneous expenses.

Therefore it is very important to protect yourself from a cheating spouse as early as possible to avoid greater emotional and financial suffering.

This is a perfect example of the saying that goes “What you do not know can definitely hurt you”. By YOU, that means your marriage, your kids, your family and your finances.

Extra vigilance is absolutely a must when it comes to guarding your marriage. Here are just a few tips on how to detect if you have yourself a cheating spouse.

The cheating spouse stops wearing the wedding ring. This is the most classic sign of a cheating partner because it is a reminder of you.

No one wants to have sex with a third party and get reminded of the vows he or she made on her wedding day. When your spouse is trying to seduce another man or woman wedding rings are just not a good point of conversation.

When the spouse raises hypothetical questions it means that he or she is testing the waters.

“Do you think it’s possible to love more than one person at one time?”, “Are you open to sexually experimenting with other people?”, or “What if you find out you’re in love with someone else?”

These are just sample questions that a cheating spouse would ask his partner. The reason for testing the waters is to see just how much he or she can get away with.

They want to know where you stand, what to expect from you, where to put themselves around the situation.

Birth control contradictions

If she keeps birth-control pills in her purse and the husband has had a vasectomy or if the cheating husband carries condoms while the wife is on the pill, then something up definitely up.

The biggest fear of a cheating spouse is to have a love-child with the third party. If cheating is not hard enough, bringing an illegitimate child into an adulterous situation makes things much more complicated.

Sometimes the signs of a cheating spouse don’t need to be figured out by a rocket scientist. A basic detective work at home can do the trick.

Go to the bathroom and get familiar with the scents of your spouse’s Eau de toilette personal hygiene products. This procedure may require you to act like a CSI cast member.

You need to develop your sense of smell for the scent of his aftershave, or the scent of her conditioner.

Familiarize your olfactory nerves well enough to differentiate your spouse’s smell before he or she leaves and when he or she comes home for dinner.

If your partner leaves the house smelling like Dove and he or she comes home smelling like Gatsby then it can be because of a post coital quickie shower.

If you have a monthly inspection in your spouse’ workplace you can notice certain non verbal behavior around how his co workers respond to your presence.

They may be uncomfortable when you are in the room. This is because they share a part of the guilt for not telling you. What you need to do is to keep a close look on how they establish eye contact with you.

If you ask them questions and they answer you without looking into your eyes, chances are they’re afraid to lie to you.

Money talks. If the co workers do not talk, then you can count on the bank statements doing the talking. Check credit card records for suspicious purchases that never landed on your lap.

If your husband bought a pair of bra from Victoria’s Secret and your breasts have been resting on loose strappy tops that you resourcefully turned into a sports bras by sewing shoulder pads into them, or if your wife’s most recent purchase was an Expedia Romance Getaway Package trip for two to Kona around the time she was gone for 2 weeks on a “business trip”, then that’s a definite relationship red flag.

The point here is that you need to be keen, smart and resourceful. Getting a hold of your checking account deposit reviews can also give you a strong piece of evidence to support your suspicions.

The case is true when you find small gift items in your spouse’s possession and you don’t remember buying him or her anything recently.

Just as a cheating spouse would try to impress the third party with expensive gifts, he or she will also be reciprocated with the same gesture.

Inspect further. Usually these gifts come with letters, cards or little notes that your cheating spouse will cherish heartily.

They’re just cunningly hidden somewhere in there. Check the garage too. Oftentimes, people hide things they don’t want anyone to see in remotely odd places like a tool box, an old, unused cooler or in an innocent-looking box at the topmost shelf of your basement.

Lastly, if your gut strongly bothers you at night for no immediate and apparent reason at all, then this is actually your subconscious telling you to end your self-denials face the situation and surrender to your instincts.

Most people ignore their gut feeling when it comes to dealing with their husbands or wives because of the fear of confrontation.

Although ignorance may be bliss for some people, true happiness still comes from an honest and realistic awareness of knowing what you really have and finding ways to free yourself from the bondage of an unhealthy relationship.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Cheating Girlfriend

kajay — Sat, 07 May 2011 19:12:41 +0000

Believe it or not but a cheating girlfriend is harder to detect than a cheating guy. Society has a big influence on this.

Most of our societies are dominated and governed by the male species. It’s a patriarchal world that we live in, thus, people tend to underestimate the capacities of women when it comes to playing cunning games in relationships.

Women are often perceived as more submissive than men and this assumption alone gives them the edge when it comes to cheating.

People are easily preconditioned by the image of a woman to be this gentle, docile and often agreeable love maniac who is content with just one man by her side.

Incapable of performing such atrocious acts against men, generally speaking women get away with cheating because people unfailingly would always want to believe that all women are a certain way.

On a subconscious level, men always compare their girlfriends to their mothers one way or another.

And no respectable guy would ever dream of a cheating woman in his life, just as how he always wanted to look at his mother as a pure and loving creature.

The perception of men towards their girlfriends is held sacred, or at least that’s what they want to believe.

This fact gives women an advantage because if you turn the tables, men, based on societal prejudices, are somehow defined as polygamous and genetically sexually promiscuous beings.

Thus, it is more socially acceptable and common to see a cheating man than a cheating woman. This denial, however misleading, should always be recognized so that certain assumptions can be corrected.

As much as we would like to categorize every cheater in different boxes we must also always remember that a cheating girlfriend may be different from a cheating wife in the sense that the impact is much more damaging when marriage is involved. Thus, if your woman happens to cheat on you, the bright side is that there’s an easier way out.

Just break up with her! At least you can say to yourself that you were able to find out sooner before you even proposed to her.

Whereas a cheating wife is just a big bummer, and if there’s a way out it usually involves an excruciating, expensive and burdensome legal procedure that starts with the letter D and rhymes with the word “horse” which later on can lead to another painful word that begins with the letter A and rhymes with the word “money”!

So having a cheating girlfriend is not that bad.

What can only be worse though is when you prolong the agony to the point where you’ve already bought the engagement ring that cost you an arm and a leg. So here are a few things to take note of and when you suspect that your girlfriend is cheating on you.

One of the most common signs of a cheating girlfriend is that she may start spending more time away from home. It could be that she suddenly keeps getting called into work at odd hours, working late or that she often has to be away on business.

Whenever your girlfriend starts spending a lot of time away from home and coming or going at odd hours compared to her usual schedule it can be a sign that she is cheating.

Unlike men, women have a common tendency to spill things about their girl friends that they should not have. Gossip is part of their nature.

So when your girlfriends’ friends begin to give you hints or that you’ve heard something scandalous about her from a friend of a friend of her friend, then it’s time to look into the matter.

Women talk! When this happens just remember the saying, “When there’s smoke, there’s fire!”

Although it is very easy to get her hairstylist to divulge information about her affair it is also very easy for a woman to deny certain accusations when confronted.

Therefore you should make sure your facts are backed up by evidence. It is very hard to prove a cheating woman than a cheating man because of the aforementioned fact about societal expectations of women.

So before you go face-to-face with her make sure you clear your head first and not get carried away by your own self denials.

A cheating girlfriend is smart enough to cover her tracks by meeting her other man in discreet, remote places on the other side of town.

Perhaps a small inn right next to a narrow alley or a motel that is beyond a 50 mile radius from your home can be the “safest” bet. Women are more careful by nature. They plan things ahead of time, while men just go with the flow.

If a woman is cheating, trust that she will make sure everything is covered. From the location of their love nest, to the alibis that she’ll give you when she comes home, it’s all premeditated.

Part of covering her back means that money is involved. She will spend money to get her as far away as possible, or to keep things clean.

This means that a frequent visit to a hotel room would cost her more than taking risks by bringing the guy to her apartment.

When your girlfriend seems to spend money with nothing to show for it, or that the numbers just don’t add up when she seems to constantly lose money without any visible signs of recent purchase then you can investigate more. It could be a sign of cheating.

If your girlfriend suddenly starts taking more time with her hair and makeup without a special occasion she could be trying to impress whomever she is cheating with.

Pay attention to her underwear because most girls like to wear sexy underwear to seduce the guy they are with especially if it is someone new.

If you are used to her wearing granny panties but later on she puts on a lace thong to head to work it could be a sign that she is seeing someone else.

Lastly, always remember that for women it is more emotional than sexual so you can also consider looking at how she interacts with you.

For women, out of sight means out-of-mind. If she rarely sees you than usual or if she starts to lose interests in activities you both share and if she seems to frequently look at her watch during dates, then something is up. It may seem like her mind is somewhere else.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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49 Signs of a Cheating Husband

kajay — Tue, 01 Feb 2011 19:46:18 +0000

You just feel it in your soul. The ‘signs’ are there. Every fibre of your being is telling you that your husband is cheating on you. But is he?

Have a read of this article, and see how many of the signs are applicable to you.

1) He is less attentive in the bedroom: Now this one may be difficult to measure, because it depends how active your sex life is on the whole.

It is a very personal area, and a lot of couples who, for example, have been married for a long time, or are particularly stressed, may find that that initial spark dampens in the bedroom.

This is perfectly normal. My advice here is to listen to yourself. Only YOU can know whether or not the way that your husband behaves in the bedroom is ‘different’ to his usual behaviour, but it is common practise if he is ‘getting it’ elsewhere then his sex drive when he comes home may be significantly reduced.

2) He seems to be working out more or maybe for the first time ever! : If your man suddenly develops an interest in ‘working out’, it could just be that he has decided he needs to lose a few pounds. Of course, it could also mean that he is trying to get (and keep) the interest of a younger, fitter play thing.

Men of a certain age in particular, are prone to suddenly deciding that they need to appear younger, and this can be triggered by the interest of another woman.

Men like to pump iron or go for a run, in order to feel energised, and this of course not only works on their physical appearance, it also boosts their stamina.

If your husband has always been one for working out then trips to the gym may become more ‘frequent’ as they can be used as a smokescreen to cover dates with his Mistress.

3) He is constantly working late: Similar to the gym, if he suddenly begins calling to tell you that he’ll be ‘working late’, be aware that this could be just another cover up for a night out with his Mistress. But before you jump in at the deep end, try and work out what is going on at work.

If for example, a big event is due, then this could explain the increase in hours. If nothing seems out of the ordinary, and the extra hours become rather frequent, have a think about dropping by his place of work!

4) He develops a new sense of style: Perhaps he was once a stylish individual, with the latest secret weapons. But as the years went on, he became more of a ‘casual jogging bottom’ kind of guy.

This suited you just fine, as it showed that he was comfortable to be himself around you. But if your man suddenly begins to turn up with new shirts, shoes, aftershave, but never seems to do it for you, then you have to wonder who is benefiting from it all.

5) He becomes the boy who loves his toys: There is the old saying ‘boys and their toys’. Perhaps your husband has always had his eye on flashy new things.

Perhaps from time to time he would buy them, or maybe you could never afford them. Has he suddenly decided to buy that flashy sports car? Has he splashed out on the latest phone?

If you notice a change in your guy’s spending habits, or a general loosening of the wallet strings where perhaps he used to be controlling, then again, he could well be out to impress someone.

He could even be leading a double life, and a new car for example, helps him express his ‘other identity’.

6) He decides that he wants more time with ‘the lads’: Has he suddenly decided that he wants to spend more time out with the guys?

Maybe he did this when you were dating but since being married, weekends are spent at home with take-out, or hanging out with married friends.

Has he suddenly developed an interest in going it solo with his friends? It could well be that he needs time to air a problem with a guy friend, as they do this, just as we do! But if it becomes something regular, it could be possible that he is really out with another, or he is out ‘on the hunt’.

7) His friends act differently towards you: Linked to the above, if he is out with friends, then may suddenly act a little different towards you, because they are feeling guilty of knowing that your husband was kissing another woman in the club last Saturday.

On the other hand, if he was not with his friends but was out with his Mistress, and asked them to cover, things may go one of two ways.

Either they will avoid you as they do not want to have to be asked any questions, therefore requiring them to lie. OR, they will over compensate, by going into every single detail of their clearly thought out story.

He suddenly has to take a lot of calls from his ‘friend’: It could simply be that Bob has split with his girlfriend and needs some advice, but if your husband is spending a lot of time on the phone then you do have to wonder who to.

9) He gets a lot more calls about ‘business’: Similar to the above. It could be that there is a problem that he has to deal with at work.

But if that is the case, then he will not mind you hearing in on the action. If every time your husband gets a call on his cell phone, he takes it to the other room, or even worse, goes out, you can begin to wonder exactly who it is that he is talking to.

10) He does not want these extra calls from his friend or work and so keeps his phone turned off: If he has suddenly decided that he prefers to keep his phone turned off at home, it could mean that his Mistress is threatening to call him, wanting to let the cat out of the bag.

If he fears getting a lot of calls or text messages, perhaps because they have had an argument, he will turn the phone and leave it like that.

11) He is spending more and more time on the internet: It could just be that he is using it for his business. Again, this all depends on the general circumstances in his life.

But if for example, he was not usually one for surfing the internet but is suddenly showing an interest in how it all works, particularly things like social networking and messenger, then it could well be that he is trying to find every avenue through which he can chat to his girlfriend.

12) He has secret email accounts: Have you noticed when you go to log into your mail provider, that it shows the last address to log in and it is not one that you recognise? Or perhaps the same happens on messenger, or Facebook. Perhaps he has a secret account that he uses for him and her.

13) He is spending more time online when you have gone to bed: Perhaps he says he is going to stay up and watch the game, but when he thinks you are sleeping, you can hear the tapping on the keyboard.

Perhaps you have gone to the kitchen to grab some water and unexpectedly caught him on webcam? Question to ask, is why he is doing this, when he has a wife in bed?

14) He is careful to clear the web history: If you share a computer you will know whether this something that he does regularly, or not.

Has he suddenly started to clear the web history? Just what is it that he is trying to remove all evidence of?

15) You find receipts for goods or hotel rooms that were not shared with you: One of the old clichés.

But if you find receipts for gifts, hotel rooms, trips, restaurant bills, that were not spent with you and are not accounted for by his work, then you are probably looking at facing facts that your husband is seeing another woman.

Before you accuse him of this however, take a photocopy of the receipt, and keep it somewhere safe. Do not take away any evidence that you find, as this will alert him onto the fact that you are onto him and he will be more cautious.

16) You find things on credit card bills that cannot be explained: Very similar to the above, but one that you are much more likely to be able to keep track off, especially if you have joint accounts, or he leaves his post lying around from time to time. Just remember that it is illegal to open another’s private mail though!

17) You start to get nuisance, silent calls: Has your phone been ringing at home but when YOU pick up they hang up?

It could be that your husband’s other woman is getting close to telling you about their affair. Perhaps she is just intrigued about what kind of woman you are.

Maybe she has fallen in love with him and views YOU as the ‘other woman’ and becomes a little obsessed with you.

There all manner of reasons behind this sort of behaviour but a good move is to get caller ID and then present the number to your husband and calmly ask him if he knows the number. Watch his expression and reaction carefully.

18) He comes home and takes a shower almost right away: If he has spent the afternoon with his Mistress, he will want to shower as soon as he gets home.

Sometimes, he will even avoid kissing you hello, insisting that he has to dash to the bathroom first. This is because he may smell of her perfume, or even worse, smell of her body scent!

He will want to remove all traces of this as soon as possible. Smell is a very personal thing, and we all know what our partner smells like normally and when something is up.

19) He is creating arguments that seem to be over ‘nothing’: This may be a sign of several things.

For a start he may be feeling so guilty, that he is stressed, and when people are stressed, their tempers fray.

Or, maybe he is looking for reasons to create tension, so that he can justify his actions in his mind by believing that YOU are the one at fault, or he wants an excuse to storm out of the house and go and see his Mistress.

20) He seems to be distant and cold: This could mean that he is just having an off day. But if you used to talk and share things, and now he seems to be distant, then it could be that he is avoiding intimacy on an emotional level with you because he wants to avoid ‘feeling’ close to you as it will make him feel guilty.

21) He has unexplained marks on his body: It sounds obvious, but sometimes, the most obvious things are that way for a reason.

This is especially worrying if the two of you are no longer enjoying sexual relations. You know the sort of things to look for – nail marks, scratches, even love bites!

22) He avoids undressing in front of you: This links to tip number 21. Perhaps he does have a mark that he is attempting to hide, so he may take a shower before bed and undress and change there.

Or perhaps he wants to change with the lights off. You will know if he changes his usual routine.

23) He avoids putting his dirty laundry in the basket: Does his dirty laundry appear to have reduced in load?

It could be that he does not want you to discover stains, scents or items that you are not familiar with.

Perhaps he is taking his stuff to the laundrette during his working day.

One thing is for sure, if clean clothing suddenly appears, but you have not washed it, then he is either getting it done at the laundrette or by his other woman.

24) He starts giving you Extra attention: A lot of the information so far, has been about him seeming distant and withdrawing. But some men attempt to hide their infidelity by showing their wife a new interest and attention.

If he suddenly seems friendlier, more attentive and like he is making the effort, when he has not done so for some time, it could be that he is trying to throw you off the scent of his affair.

Of course, he could be wanting to rekindle your marriage, so don’t just assume that this automatically means that he is cheating.

25) He starts buying you gifts… and more gifts: Carrying on from tip number 24, if your husband suddenly begins to splash the cash on you, coming home with flowers, and chocolates, these could be the actions of a man who is feeling guilty and has something to hide.

26) He begins to act suspicious of YOUR actions and turns into Mr Paranoid: They say, that those who are often most paranoid, are actually the ones with something to hide.

A cheater often imagines that if they are behaving in such a way, then everyone else must be too! Has your husband suddenly started questioning you about your actions and friendships?

This is a great tactic to turn the tables and focus to you, but it could also be that he is genuinely wondering if you too are capable of infidelity as the subject is playing on his mind.

27) He accuses you of an affair: This is the next step on from tip number 26. Often his suspicions may escalate, and he will go out of his way to fully accuse you of having an affair.

This is a great tactic, as it not only puts you in the frame (and not him), it gives rise to arguments, so he can spend more time out of the house, and may even be used as a catalyst for having a final excuse to leave you, if and when he decides to take this step.

28) He plants seeds of doubt in his and your friend’s minds: If he is really clever, then he may even ask your friends, or perhaps your mutual friends, whether he thinks that you could be seeing someone else.

This plants the seed in their minds, so if and when you finally ask them the same thing about HIM, they believe that you are thinking this because of your own actions.

He can also use it as an excuse if he ever does decide to leave you as he can say that he had known about your affair, and had chosen to move on.

29) He begins to tell you stories about how he thinks so and so is cheating: Does cheating seem to be your partner’s new favourite topic?

It could be that he is trying to work out whether or not you suspect anything. Plus, he may want to know how you would handle things if you should ever find out that he has been cheating on you.

For example. If he asks ‘what would you do if you were Susan?’ – If you say that you would try and forgive and forget then he knows that he is onto a safer bet.

30) He decides that you should spend more time with the girls: If he suddenly decides that you should spend more time with the girls, it could be that he is trying to free up some of his own time so that he can see his bit on the side but know exactly where you will be and when you are due to come home.

31) He suggests that you take a girly vacation! : He may even go as far as to suggest that you take a trip away. Perhaps he even treats you to it, a spa break, a weekend away.

This is basically packing your bags and sending you off so that you are as far away as possible and on a schedule that he has planned, so that he can enjoy more extra marital time, without wondering if he’ll get caught.

32) He suggests that you get a new haircut, or treats you to new clothing: it could be that he wants to treat you so that you do not suspect he is cheating.

Or it could be, that he is used to the way that his new lady looks, and is wanting to spruce you up a bit so that you too can appear just as attractive in his eyes.

Maybe she has had a new haircut and it is the first thing on his mind. Is he suggesting things that would not normally have come up in conversation?

33) He takes you window shopping and asks your opinion on things: It’s sickening but true! He may even ask your opinion on things, and make it seem like he is considering getting you a gift, but secretly he has no one else to ask advice on what to get for his Mistress’ up-coming birthday!

34) He begins to wonder what he has done with his life: If he is frustrated, it could simply be the start of a midlife crisis. But it could be that he has found happiness elsewhere, and is questioning his whole existence.

Falling for another woman may make him wonder if he married the right person in the first place, whether his children should ever have been born, and whether he is too old to make a new start.

35) He changes your usual hangouts: Has he started taking you to a different restaurant? Maybe even a different supermarket?

If his Mistress has found out where you are likely to be, he may fear that the two of you will run into each other, so may start suggesting nights out at a place in the next town.

You get the idea. Of course, he may just want to shake things up a little but he could also be hiding his secret and leading a double life.

36) He stops wearing his wedding ring as often: Has he ‘forgotten’ to put it on when he heads out the house? Maybe he even hides it and claims to have mislaid it?

One thing is for sure, if he is seeing someone who does not know that he is even married, the last thing that he will be wanting to flash, is that little band of gold.

He may also remove it because ‘out of sight is out of mind’ and he does not want a constant reminder of you when he is already feeling guilty when out with her.

37) Starts to kiss ‘differently’: If the kissing and contact has not stopped, he may still want to be close to you but something just seems ‘different’. Couples develop their own unique kissing style, that has its own rhythm and pace, with its own little quirks.

Has he started to kiss in a different way? Perhaps incorporating things such as lip biting when he has never done it before? It could be that he is now so used to kissing another woman that he forgets how he kisses you.

38) Sex is not the same as it once was: If you are still sexual, and this contact has not ended, then perhaps he just seems to be acting distant in the bedroom, or is performing in ways that are unusual for him.

He may suddenly start trying out new positions, and it is like he has swallowed the Kama Sutra! Like with kissing, this could be that he is developing new habits with his other lady friend, and these are sticking – even when it comes to you.

39) He suggests more outrageous sexual activities: Outrageous for you two that is. I am not suggesting that anything beyond missionary is ‘outrageous’.

But if he suddenly demands that you spice things up and try out swinging for example, it could be that he is looking to bring up the topic of being sexual with other people – and may be looking to introduce it into your marriage.

40) He begins to call you by pet names that you have never used before: Does he call you babe? Has he never done this before?

This may be common if his other woman is younger than you. Perhaps he has got used to calling her such names, in order to impress her, and accidentally slips onto the end of his sentence to you.

41) He calls you by the wrong name: As obvious as this one sounds, yes, it really does happen! A Freudian slip of the tongue, calling you by her name, is something that is actually common.

If this happens, don’t let him squirm out of it too easily. If you are unsure whether it means that he is seeing someone else, flip it over and look at it from this angle – how on earth could there be any confusion over the name of the woman he married and supposedly loves?

42) You find stray hairs on his jacket, and clothes: There may be little signs left around that point to evidence of this other woman’s presence.

The odd stray hair could just be from the woman he stood next to on the train, but if you find them regularly and they are quite obviously not from you, you may have to wonder who has been that up close and personal with him.

43) You find her possessions in odd places: Yes it really can happen! Just like in the movies! Perhaps she even planted those panties under your car seat because she secretly wants you to find out about their affair, as she is hoping he will leave you.

One thing is for sure, however they got there, if you find suspicious items in your husband’s possession, be pretty sure that he is seeing another.

44) You find lipstick on his collar: Again, another old cliché, but if he is not careful about washing his own clothing then you may find the odd mark that leaves no doubt in your mind that he is spending time with another woman.

Lipstick marks, foundation lines where she has had her head on his chest, you name it, but even the best cheater is bound to slip up from time to time.

45) You find unusual items in his car: Not as obvious as the underwear scenario, but just empty drinks cartons on the passenger side.

Or take away wrappers from places that he would not usually eat in. It could be that they were out in the car together and he forgot to clear away the evidence.

46) Your car seat keeps on moving position: This is one that not many people would ever consider.

But have you noticed that when you get into your car seat, especially if it is the passenger one, you have to keep re-adjusting the seat position?

Maybe she is a taller model, and needs that extra leg room or perhaps they stop in the countryside, and make out on the seat.

If it keeps magically moving you can bet that it is being used frequently by someone else, or for something else.

47) He says that he needs space: Space from whom, what? YOU. He may not say this. He could pin it on an unexplained depression.

But if your husband announces that he wants some space, it is a good sign that he has something or someone on his mind, and needs time away to work out how he feels.

This is especially even more evident, if he does not want to discuss what is bothering him and seems resistant to your advances to try and clear the air.

48) He suggests a trial separation: The next step up from wanting space. If he decides that you should take a break but as far as you are concerned, you did not see it coming, then it could be that he has met someone else and wants to test the waters of being separated from you, before he takes that final step.

Almost like test driving a car, he can see if he misses you and still have time to come back, and he may also spend this time living with his Mistress, to see whether or not he is making the right decision.

49) He tells you ‘it’s not you, it’s me’: if ever you hear this line you know that it actually IS you. Okay, it may not be your fault.

But what he really means, is that it’s him who wants to get away and it is you who he wants to get away from, whether it is your fault or not. He is just trying to soften the blow, and not have to really explain his actions or wanting to leave.

The old ‘it’s not you, it’s me’ line is a great way of avoiding any real discussion as he can act confused, depressed, and at the same time, can leave you but not leave you feeling rejected.

This eases his conscience and you are less likely to want to try and sort things out there and then if you have no idea what the problem is.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Signs Your Partner Is Lying To You

kajay — Fri, 21 Jan 2011 17:46:53 +0000

Ever had that hunch, where you just knew that your partner was lying?

Maybe you shrugged it off, through fear of coming across as paranoid, but deep down, it kept niggling away at you.

People are bad at spotting liars because they look for the wrong signals, according to research presented to the British Association’s annual science festival in Leicester, UK. (BBC News)

So we have compiled a check list for you so that you know what you really should be looking out for.

Always listen to your intuition: It sounds obvious right. But let’s be honest here. How many of us hear our intuition but then try and rationalise or ignore what it is saying to us?

The issue, is that once we have that ‘gut feeling’, we are not quite sure how to act upon it. But don’t just stifle your inner voice, because more often than not, it is trying to tell you something!

It’s all about their eyes: Assume that if they’re lying they will no longer look you in the eye? Dr Richard Wiseman, of the University of Hertfordshire says otherwise.

“People are really dreadful at detecting when someone is lying. They think that liars avoid eye contact and fidget a lot. In fact, liars maintain more eye contact and they don’t fidget.”

A general rule for eye movement is if they look down to the left they are lying and if they look to the right they are remembering an actual event.

A handy tip: So, leading on from Wiseman’s advice there, have you assumed that your partner will fidget more if they are lying?

Contrary to popular belief, evidence now suggests otherwise.

Those who are usually expressive with their hands are more likely to have them stiff and rigid when they are in the process of lying. Infact their whole body is likely to stiffen up.

Say what? It’s all about the throat!: Does your partner’s speech seem to speed up, or slow down?

Are they becoming more and more erratic, perhaps frequently clearing their throat (a sign of built up tension and nerves)

Usually, nerves, which are common when someone is lying will demonstrate themselves, via the vocal medium.

Itch here, scratch there: He or she just cannot seem to stop scratching their nose today right?

Particularly when you ask them a question. This is not always a sign of lying; it can of course be a genuine case of the itches! Or, it could be a nervous reflex.

But more often than not, this accompanies the eye movements, and is a great giveaway as to whether someone is telling the truth or not! Scratching the nose, behind the ears, both are equally common.

Ever heard of a micro expression? A lying person may alter their facial expression, in the vague attempt to ‘look as though they are not lying’.

However, every now and then, a flash of their true feelings may become visible on their face; for example, someone who is nervous or stressed may show a flash of their eyebrows raising and forehead tensing.

But almost as soon as it’s visible, they switch back to their original facade.

These little ‘flashes of emotion’ on the face, are called ‘Micro expressions’ and may be harder to spot than some of the other signs I have mentioned but will definitely be visible to someone who knows what they are looking for.

Deflection: Do you find that you ask your partner a question, and he or she comes up with a very good content rich response, but somehow, they seem to be talking around the situation rather than directly answering your question? This is called ‘deflection’.

An example of this, would be, ‘So did you spend the night with another woman or not John?’ And John’s reply is ‘Oh my God Mary, how on earth could you ask such a thing? You know how much I love you.

I was telling my friend Michael just the other day that I am crazy about you’ Now if you look at that reply (and John would have continued to ramble), he does not actually answer Mary’s question.

Instead, he goes off on a tangent, and also adds in a little guilt when he says ‘Oh my God Mary, how on earth could you say such a thing?’ You may have been a victim of deflection yourself.

You probably came away feeling like ‘oh why did I ask that?’ or like you had started an argument. But the reality was, your partner was just clever enough to use deflection and make you feel that way.

Whatever you notice, remember that we are all individual, so look out for behaviour that is different to how he/she would typically demonstrate.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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On Infidelity: The Telltale Signs of a Cheating Partner

kajay — Thu, 20 Jan 2011 22:31:53 +0000

To be given love, care, and comfort the way one deserves is definitely the best things to hope for in a relationship.

The presence of a partner, whether it’s on a boyfriend-girlfriend or husband-wife relationship, gives you more reason to live life to the fullest.

But, what if one day, you found out that your sweet beginnings and whirlwind romance that your partner once shared with you are just his frontal act towards an ongoing infidelity?

How can you say that your partner is indeed betraying behind your back or it’s just your jealousy taking control over your emotions? These telltale signs of a cheating partner will help you determine if your partner has indeed strayed.

Understanding Infidelity

Infidelity is best defined as betrayal of trust of your partner.

In a relationship bounded by love, there’s an existing agreement that the two parties will be exclusive to each other as often manifested by their togetherness and emotional attachment.

This only means that as partners, both of you are in complete trust and confidence that only the two of you deserve each others time, effort, attention, and most specially, trust.

Infidelity, as we all know, can hail in almost all relationships for everyone is prone to check on others while they are still attached.

In today’s society, infidelity is given the highest regards and meaning in marriage.

Marriage is very different from any relationship since the latter is strengthened by the blessing from the couples’ preferred religion, as well as the civil laws on marriage declared in their state.

The intensity and effect of marital infidelity on couples is so severe that it doesn’t only ruin the relationship, but also ruin the couples’ personal and family life (especially if there are already children prior to the infidelity).

What makes an act a form of infidelity differs from one relationship to the other.

Relationships, for one, have a varying degree or levels depending on the intimacy or emotional attachment both parties have invested.

Because of this, the effect of any form of disloyalty is dependent on the established level of relationship.

A simple hi and hello from the opposite sex by your partner maybe considered infidelity for you, but for others its not.

Generally, cheating by having other person besides the original partner in the relationship is already infidelity. Catching your partner cheating on you is a difficult task than hitting the sack.

Emotions play a big role here since it will drive you to suspect your partner’s actions, impregnate your mind with hunches, and rely your observations in instincts.

Despite the high possibility of you failing to catch a cheating partner, there are still close telltale signs that can help you determine if there’s indeed someone else.

Common Signs – Change in Behavior

Change in behavior is probably the easiest to detect among all telltale signs. A person cheating from his/her partner has two options – show too much affection as if they are still in the early stage of the relationship and show no care at all.

Being affectionate during normal occasions like an ordinary meet-up may mean that they are putting a cast on their wrongdoing and by doing such, they will not be a subject of suspicion.

Showing no care, on the other hand, only suggest that your partner neither care for you nor the relationship, and they are willing to end whatever you have in the soonest possible time.

Anxiety is also a sign.

If your partner always look worried when you are together but seldom tells a problem about his/her other life aspects, then he/she might be thinking someone else at that moment.

Anxiety can also manifest in other actions such as being too talkative, clingy, or shows unusual longing for you in a typical day.

Intimacy Blues

It’s inevitable that your partner loses the libido for quite sometime. There may be things that he/she prioritizes more as of the moment and sex is not one of them.

However, if this starts to loom as your relationship’s concern already, then there’s a problem.

His/Her lack of intimacy is most often heartfelt when there’s no more showing of concern and sexual interest. One must not neglect an excessive behavior on intimacy as this can also be a culprit.

A cheating partner most likely experienced an amazing and different sexual activities with his/her other party during the time of infidelity.

These activities, moreover, can be brought in your intimate moments and that in itself can easily be spotted. A change in kissing style, an unusual embrace, and a different intimate position are the best examples of this.

Self-image and People as Suspects People change themselves every time they get excited about a new beginning or they are up for a roller coaster ride.

If your partner starts to think of changing his look by getting a haircut and updating his wardrobe, then there might be something going on outside his/her life with you.

Ask them the purpose of the intended change and if the answer you get is because they just want to look good (and not because they want to look good in your eyes), your hunch on his/her infidelity is most likely true.

Hiding of people’s names by your partner behind your back is also a sign.

Although it’s not a rule that you must share the same circle of friends, the mere fact that he/she doesn’t want to inform you of the other people in his/her life simply means that there’s a low level of trust.

Being involved in a relationship involves a good sharing of information about each others’ life, either through a name drop or in complete detail.

Showing hesitance in sharing even the names of friends is enough for you to have doubts about his possible betrayal.

Let’s be honest.These telltale signs can only go as far. Suspicions, hunches, and doubts will remain in their acquired form unless proven true.

The next best thing to do after observing these bodily signs is to talk to your partner, think things out, and eventually mend whatever is left with your decaying relationship.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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10 Things To Consider Before Confronting A Cheating Spouse

kajay — Thu, 20 Jan 2011 22:21:54 +0000

Cheating or Infidelity is a violation of the mutually agreed-upon rules or boundaries of an intimate relationship. It may arise if a partner in the relationship acts outside of the understood boundaries of that relationship.

As the saying says, “it takes two to tango”. Don’t blame it all in your husbands. As a wife, you should consider also if you are taking your husband for granted.

I have a long lost friend that I just bumped into somewhere, after a little chitchat, I knew that he left his wife for another woman.

I asked him why, the only reason he said is that his wife has been ignoring him for quite some time now. She stopped giving him marital attention. He then warned his wife that if she kept on doing that, he might find another woman.

When he realized that he has lost his interest in having sex with his wife and they never share the same interest anymore, the last thing he knew was he is getting closer to another woman who is giving him an attention he needs and now starting a new life with her.

Things to consider before confronting your cheating spouse:

Confronting a cheating spouse is a very difficult thing to do.

Make sure you do it wisely.

You should always consider all options before confronting your spouse that has been caught cheating on you. It is a good idea to have a phone close by in case things get out of hand.

People take this kind of confrontation many ways.

They either put up a fight by denying the charges, or they flee. The ones that stay and deny, and become defensive understand all that is at stake. They know what they can lose by their infidelity.

The person who runs away already has it in their mind that the relationship is over, and was probably hoping to get caught so that they can begin their relationship with the other person.

Women are born with strong sense of intuition.

Unlike men, we strongly believe if he is fooling around. If your spouse is cheating, you know that at some point a confrontation concerning the affair is inevitable. There are some definite “do’s” and “don’ts” to keep in mind when the moment arrives.

1. Have privacy. Confronting infidelity is best accomplished in private. Send your children away for the day.

2. Never assume that by confronting your partner about their affair that it will automatically end the relationship. As a government employee for 6 years, I have seen countless relationships battered by a cheating spouse, mostly men, and not all of them ended in divorce.

Some have ended it and just forgotten what they had and some go back together in their affair.

There is such a thing as a “happy ending” in some of these situations where true “change of heart” and forgiveness take place.

Don’t be afraid to confront fearing a termination of the relationship. A confrontation just might be the best thing to save your love.

3. Never divulge your suspicions with numerous friends, family and work mates. It is a sad reality that most people cannot keep a confidence.

Irreparable damage can occur by reckless gossip. If you have a desire to reconcile with your loved one, then keep this information to yourself or to a very trusted confidante or counselor. You need information before confronting infidelity.

Hire a detective, or conduct your own investigation by simply observing, listening and documenting the facts

4. Try to be discreet in the investigation of your partner. If they sense you are paranoid about all of their behavior, more permanent damage can be done that might imperil your future together.

Again, keep in mind that there is hope or a remedy to this crisis that may allow your hopes of living as a couple stay alive.

5. Try to keep extreme emotions under control when confrontation actually takes place.

Get all of the crying, screaming, swearing, and rage out of your system when it actually comes for the time when you say “we need to talk”.

Extreme emotions at the point of confrontation could lead you to do or say something that you will deeply regret just moments later.

You’re on a fact-finding mission; as you confront your cheating partner, avoid name-calling, hot-button words and phrases containing the F- word.

Remember, it’s easy to lie to a ‘yes’ or ‘no’ question. Ask questions like ‘What were you doing at Sally’s house?”

6. Have your facts right. When you confront your spouse with “accurate” information they will be less inclined to start telling even bigger lies.

Much damage occurs not from the initial affair but from the ever increasing magnitude of lies that the offender conjures up. Being well informed will signal to your lover that the “gig is up”.

Confront your cheating partner with facts, photos and witnesses, and the response may still be a lie. Remain diligent; lies eventually lead to the truth.

7. Listen without interrupting. This may be one of the hardest things to do but you owe it to your partner to listen to what they have to say.

You initiated this confrontation and good courtesy demands that you listen.

8. Consider whether you are willing to reconcile. Is this confrontation just a means of getting even or is reconciliation your main motivation?

This is a question you should have already answered in your own mind before you confront.

9. Think through the ramifications of divorce. If you are unwilling to reconcile then you better consider the fallout from divorce.

The fallout will involve your finances, your emotions, your children and just about every other facet of your life.

10. Take care of your health. Stressful events such as infidelity can have a devastating effect on your health.

In the days before the “show down” make sure you get enough rest and that your diet is healthy. You’ll need to look your best and feel your best before this conversation takes place.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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49 Tips On How To Recover From An Affair

kajay — Tue, 18 Jan 2011 02:08:07 +0000

Considering that, the probability of someone cheating during the course of a relationship varies between 40 and 76 percent – (Geneviève Beaulieu-Pelletier, PhD student at the Université de Montréal’s Department of Psychology.), chances are, that at least 4 in 10 of us, will at one time or another, become the latest victim of the heartbreak of infidelity.

Help is at hand however, in the form of my handy report, ’49 tips to recover from an affair’ Make yourself comfortable, relax and have a read, and soon you’ll be smiling in wonderment at the idea of being able to feel a lot better in as little as 21 days!

‘It takes 21 days to make or break a habit’ Psychologist Maxwell Maltz in his book ‘Psycho-cybernetics

1) You are luckier than you think! – Now you want to hit me right?

But think about it – wouldn’t you rather have found out that your partner was not worthy of your affections now than another ten years down the line?

You have a shot at a happier, much better deserved life path, only question now, is are you going to take it?

2) It’s going to take some time! – You are not going to feel better after you jump into bed with the gardener next door, or drown your sorrows in that bottle of Vodka you had left over since Christmas.

This is a shock to the system, and this whole recovery process, is going to take a little time. The sooner that you accept and embrace this little simple, but important fact, the sooner you can allow yourself to ‘just be’ for the time being.

3) It’s going to feel a hell of a lot worse, before it feels better! – It’s like having a band aid ripped off, to reveal a seeping and infected wound.

You have to clean all of the muck out, before you can begin to feel better or even think about healing. Acknowledge that whilst you may feel okay one minute, it’s pretty normal to feel shell shocked the next. But let this raw emotion ooze out from every pore.

4) Feel and Heal! – Give yourself permission to feel whatever it is that you’re feeling. Try not to over analyse it. Just become a spectator, on the outside looking in.

Imagine your thoughts are bubbles, and watch them float away. Some will burst, others will linger but the ones that you need to come back to will find a way of sticking around.

Acceptance is the key; you have suffered a shock to the system. After acceptance comes the real work.

5) Express yourself! – No I’m suggesting you listen to Madonna, but you need to let out this mass of raw emotion.

Verbally attacking your partner may feel amazing for all of minute, but the emotional hangover will some come knocking.

Try and keep this between just you and yourself. Begin by writing a journal, and every time you feel inspired to do so, just allow the thoughts to smother the paper. Do not hold back. Work out that aggression!

6) It takes 21 days to make or break a habit – Psychologist Maxwell Maltz figured out, that it takes the human subconscious, 21 days to make or break a habit.

Your addiction to your partner’s presence in not all in your imagination. You are going to need to draw up a detox plan, and I promise you that if you can stick to this, you’re going to be feeling a lot more like yourself, once the mental vacation is up!

7) Pencil in that Vacation! – Yes! Okay, you may be committed to work schedules, so I am not literally talking a trip to Las Vegas.

But mark it down on your calendar, and make it more official. For the three weeks, you are on a relationship vacation!

Give yourself time out! – You are not the one who has cheated, so why do you need to work anything out? You need time out to handle things.

It’s better to approach any form of discussion after the 21 day relationship vacation. It’s a little like a snow globe – the more that you keep on rattling it, the more the snow (your thoughts) refuses to settle.

9) During time out, why not work out? – I’m not talking about making yourself more attractive.

But the best way to get some of this raw emotion out, is to get that serotonin flowing! A 15 minute walk every evening, will have your happy hormones pumping and you’ll be feeling lifted in no time at all! It’s also a great way to get out any pent up aggression.

10) Add some super fuel into your engine! – You would not expect your car to run on empty, so why treat yourself any different?

Dose up on super foods, and keep yourself balanced. Your stress levels will be critical and your immune system compromised, so throw in some green tea, goji berries, and magnesium rich snacks such as turkey and bananas.

11) The use of mobiles is not permitted! – During the 21 days, keep your vacation a contact free zone.

You need to wean yourself off your habit to your relationship, and even if you do want to ‘talk’, it’s better to do so when emotions are more settled.

Getting yourself wound up by going back to look at the crime scene so to speak will do you no favours whatsoever.

12) Get yourself a support buddy! – Like with any sort of detox programme, you need to find someone to confide in, and to take the edge off those urges to call at set times like you used to.

So if you used to call your ex at 7pm every evening, call your buddy instead. Replacing one habit with another is a pro-active way to moving forwards.

13) And whilst we’re on the subject of friends…. you may want to hang out with those you abandoned when you became part of a duo and lost your solo Identity.

Spending time with positive people who bring out the best in YOU will remind you of the fabulous individual you really are

14) Steer clear of friends with benefits! – You know exactly what I’m talking about! There is enough confusion for the time being so avoid using others as a band aid. It’ll come back to haunt you eventually

15) You’re hired! To write a ‘love script’ – You need to get yourself focused. So imagine that you have been hired by a Hollywood director, and you’re to cast the leading man or woman for the latest romantic blockbuster.

You are asked to model the leading agent on your ideal man or woman. What qualities does he or she possess? Write a list, and then have fun writing a love script. How does the story end?

16) It’s time to get raw and naked! – No don’t get over excited, I’m talking about ‘emotionally raw and naked’.

Having reminded yourself of how you envisioned your love life to be, you’re allowed to feel somewhat cheated, in more ways than one! Go back to the idea of thoughts as bubbles and sit with this feeling for a little while.

17) Look at yourself in the ‘mirror’ – Psychologists claim that what we dislike in another is often a reflection of something in ourselves.

Nothing ever excuses infidelity, but if you’re honest with yourself, there were probably cracks appearing that maybe led to the action? If so, did you play a role in this, and if so how? Be brutally honest with yourself.

18) Now smother yourself with acceptance! – No matter what mistakes were made in your just ended relationship, communication could have always been an option.

There is no excuse that he or she cheated, so try and accept that you’re simply a human, who loved another, and for whatever reason things did not work.

Forget that you did this, and forget that you did that. None of us are perfect, but no matter what flaws YOU brought to the table, your partner made an active choice to avoid resolution and hide in infidelity.

19) Make a date! With the law of attraction – If you’ve not heard of Rhonda Byrne’s book, ‘the Secret’ you must have been living on another planet.

What you focus on grows, your thoughts, become reality. So focusing on what you don’t want to feel will simply bring more to your existence.

Find some time to read up on this subject, and look at how to put it into practise.

20) It’s time to get crystal clear! – I’m not talking microdermabrasion. We’ll save the pampering for a little later.

But in order to replace negative thoughts with positives, you need to work out just what it is that you want in your life. Get some clarity, make it happen!

21) Visualise to Materialise! – In order to put your thoughts and desires ‘out there’ you need to start visualisation exercises.

Before sleep, every evening, visualise yourself in a happier existence. It does not have to be complicated right now. It can be sitting watching a sunrise. But programme your subconscious to be prepared for a life filled with beauty.

22) Decorate your own life canvas! – Once you have become used to carrying out visualisation, throw in a little more detail.

You are the artist, and the Universe has handed you a pristine white canvas. How will you decorate yours? Start to visualise how you’d like tomorrow to be. And work it up to a grander scale.

23) Set it free and let it be! – Once you have mastered the above, simply set your desires free!

24) Think about making a vision board – the subconscious mind finds it easiest to ‘drink in’ signs, images and symbols.

Take a regular cork board and fill it with things that represent your future happiness. You don’t have to sit and stare at it. Just leave it in your field of vision. This is the super charged tool for creating change, and the less you do, the better!

25) It’s time to de-clutter! – Moving the things around and spicing your space up a little is a good way to detach from old memory patterns.

Keeping things just as they were when you were last snuggled up together will do you no favours in the long run.

Have a good old clear out, and put his/her items away in boxes. You don’t have to do anymore right now, remember we’re keeping it simple!

26) Out with the old and in with the new! – Now that you have created some space, it’s a perfect opportunity to do a little retail therapy.

Whether it’s that mini gym that you always wanted, or some inspirational art work, find some new ‘items’ that will make your space feel like YOURS again.

27) Pamper, Primp, And Preen! – Cliché and as simple as it sounds, that haircut you have always fancied, or that weekend break to the spa is a must on your present agenda.

A new shade of lipstick, or working on your six pack really will make you feel like a million dollars and add a spring back into your step.

28) Dance, dance, dance! – A big night out with friends can give you a chance to set the new you out to mingle in public.

Remember that the aim is not to ‘pull’, but flex your social muscles. Remind yourself of how magnetic you truly are as an individual.

29) Dignity – make it your new best friend! – If you’re out and you see your ex partner, or it’s too soon to be out on the scene, then simply turn and walk and jump in the next taxi cab.

Remember – you are in control of your actions at all times and can choose to handle things with dignity and self respect.

30) Become your own type cast! – Going back to the idea about a character brief for a movie, (tip number 15), imagine that you are the writer for a movie about YOURSELF.

What five adjectives would you use to describe this character (i.e. you) to a big Hollywood producer? The idea is to sell yourself so remind yourself of your positives. Jot these down on a post it and keep it on your bathroom mirror.

31) Write your own dating ad! – When we are the victim of infidelity, not only is our confidence knocked as an individual, we also find it hard to remember what someone of the opposite sex will find attractive about us.

Writing your own dating ad, you know, single man/woman, aged 30 something seeks…… will help you to clarify exactly who YOU are and who and what you are looking for

32) TRUST! – The one thing that you’re probably lacking after your recent flirtation with heartbreak is the ability to trust in trust.

It will be something that you may struggle with, and the idea of ever loving again may simply fill you with dread! But not everyone is out there to get you, and you can and will trust again.

I would say trust me on this but before you trust another think about trusting yourself… and this leads me to tip 33..

33) Trust – YOURSELF! – If there is anyone in the world who you know won’t let you down, it’s yourself.

Right?

Sadly, many victims of cheating partners often lack trust in their own ability to ‘catch them and keep them’ and begin to spiral on the slippery slope of self hatred. Trusting yourself is crucial, before you can trust another.

34) Make friends with your intuition! – One way to trust in yourself is to make friends with your intuition.

Often, we simply ‘know’ when something is slightly off kilter but through fear, we choose to ignore it.

If we just trusted ourselves that little bit more and took heed of the red warning flags, we would probably walk away head strong, rather than feeling dejected. If they tell that you’re just being paranoid, dig a little deeper.

35) Forgive but never forget! – It may feel impossible right now, the idea of forgiving your partner. But forgiveness is not the same as acceptance.

Forgiving your partner for their unacceptable behaviour, puts you back in the driver’s seat of your own journey.

As long as you hold on with bitterness, your ex will always have the power, and it will be harder for you to focus in the present moment.

Clinging onto the past means letting go of the present and missing the gift that’s your life! Is he or she really worth that?

Forgiveness does not mean making excuses for him/her though, and never ever forget that THEY are responsible for the pain that you have been going through.

36) Time to re-set! – Once the initial period of coming to terms with what has happened is over, don’t then go backwards and shake up old emotions.

Like a snow globe, the more you shake it, the more blurry the scene becomes. Instead, start to think about a new scene that you’d like to see in YOUR snow globe. It’s time to write a list…..

37) Before I’m 30/40/50, I want to….. We have all written one be it mentally or literally and now is a good time as any, to write a ‘to do’ list for life’s activities.

If you’ve always wanted to Bungee, go and book that jump. If you have always wanted to travel, why not pack that back pack?

Think of all the crazy things you can do a single person and work on ticking as many off as possible, before your next relationship

38) Change your daily routine! – If you drive to work, walk. If you always shop at the same supermarket, try another.

Create new routines within what may seem like small meaningless areas.

This will also work on reprogramming your subconscious mind and memory and bizarrely, help you feel alive and in the present moment again!

If you stick to old routines, it’s easy to function on auto pilot and ‘switch off’ and this can breed depression.

39) Create a fake email account and write to your ex partner’s shadow – You still want to stick to no contact, but if you do feel you have things to say, now that you may be thinking and feeling with more clarity, before you fire off an email to him or her, why not write to their ‘shadow’ first?

You will of course, be the only person with access to this fake account, so you can log in at a later date and pick up all of the emails. But keep on expressing your ever changing emotions, without provoking the caged animal (the ex)

40) Work on communication – Think about the giving and receiving between you and your ex partner and notice how equal the flow was. Were you clear enough and about what your needs were, and were they being met?

Even now, maybe you do want to talk with your partner once you have given yourself time out but are worried you’ll go back to being a doormat or crying wreck?

Do some research on confidence building and look at body language and NLP techniques.

If your partner thinks that you’re playing the Victim, it’s all too easy to treat you like one. Show them you mean business and that you’re a catch who is one in a million.

41) Be honest as to whether it’s over – This may sound ridiculous. But many people find themselves claiming that they hate their ex partner, and would never be with them in a million years.

But their heart often says something different.

However, ego, fear of what others may think and trust issues may hold you back from holding your hands up and saying ‘actually – I would like to look at where we went wrong together and give this another go.

If this is what you desire, after giving yourself a mental vacation, then work out how to go about this.

42) Draw your line in the sand – and stick to it! – This works whether you plan to reconcile with the partner who cheated, or put yourself out on the dating market.

Write a list for your eyes only of the things that you will put up with and the things that you find unacceptable and then stick to this list with integrity!

43) Glide back into it, gently – Whether you’re giving him or her a second shot, or you’re preparing for something new, there’s no rush to make it happen yesterday.

Carry on thinking like the independent you who you have discovered over the last three weeks, and touch base with this Inner you daily.

44) Increase your value on the stock market – Imagine that you are a precious jewel and only the highest bidder can afford to take care of you.

Except the bidding will of course be in the emotional currency of love. Whilst taking things slowly as mentioned in tip 43, place higher value on yourself in general.

Don’t be so readily available, and don’t just jump into bed. Make him or her work for your time and attention. You really are a catch!

45) Remember that the past is just that – and though you should never just forget what has happened (life is full of lessons so what can you learn from this experience?) think back to the law of attraction – the more that you keep replaying old memories, the more you will attract such experiences into your future over and over and over.

Lay the past to rest and start to look forwards

46) Be open to the possibility of love – and the ability to also be loved. Life is short, and quite frankly, crap happens.

We cannot control what life throws at us but we can control how we let it affect us. If you want to wither up and die alone, then that is your call.

But there is a world of love and joy that is waiting to be discovered, and you can but make of it what you will.

47) Remember that not everyone is a cheater – Sure, the statistics in today’s modern world may seem a little ‘high’ but not everyone is a cheater.

Don’t judge everyone as though they have it in them. You may just drive away a diamond in the rough.

48) Just simply be your most authentic you! – Trying to change yourself to keep someone interested is never going to work, and you will only find true happiness and attract a match most suited to you when you are being your most real self.

Give yourself a break, relax, and know, that in doing nothing more than just being you you will attract someone on your wavelength and the road to happiness may be a lot closer and easier than you think!

49) Be grateful what you have experienced- crazy as it sounds, but it’s when we’re not constantly changing and experiencing life’s lessons that we have reached the end of our journey.

You are alive and the fact that you are ‘feeling’ shows that you are a loving, emotional person. It’s time to take the moral of this story and begin to write your next chapter.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Why An Avoidant Attachment Style Personality Is Dangerous For Your Relationship?

kajay — Mon, 17 Jan 2011 02:41:23 +0000

Once a cheater always a cheater? Could we have found the reason that some people cheat and therefore be closer to zapping this common problem?

The probability of someone cheating during the course of a relationship varies between 40 and 76 percent – says Geneviève Beaulieu-Pelletier, PhD student at the Université de Montréal’s Department of Psychology.

Ever discovered that your partner has been cheating, or has cheated on you? Did you somehow think that you could be to blame?

Maybe you were under the illusion that the figure of temptation must be thinner, sexier, more intelligent than you?

Did it even cross your mind that you partner could possibly have felt something emotionally for this other person and that if you had somehow been that little bit more funny, spontaneous or wild that their attentions would never have veered off course in the first place?

1) Blaming yourself? You are never to blame!

How would you feel if I told you that all of the above may be totally off track, and that your partner could have actually have cheated in order to stop themselves from straying too far from you?

Sounds bizarre doesn’t it, and no, I am not about to start making excuses for those who have broken marriage vows, but there is new evidence out there to support the fact that lovers may cheat as they are suffering with what is known as an avoidant attachment style personality.

What this means, is that the person with this personality type, has had something ingrained into their subconscious, right from being little, that has left them fearing rejection, and therefore avoiding commitment or attachment.

We have all flirted with the fear of letting ourselves fall for someone at the risk of being rejected for who we are.

People with avoidant attachment personality types, may have suffered some sort of loss in their early life, and fear losing those they love, and so hard as it may seem to comprehend, the fact that they may throw themselves into the arms of another, may actually be because their fear has kicked in and they are scared of losing you.

2) Cheating keeps their love for you stronger than ever!

In distracting themselves with the initial buzz of an illicit affair, they are able to almost give themselves that high, that distracts them from facing the real problem.

On the flip side of the coin, they also almost dabble with danger, and flirt with the risk of being found out, thus engaging in what could well end up as self sabotaging behaviour.

If they push their loved one away, then they cannot be rejected, so in a round about way, they may often wind up being the catalyst for the very reason that they began their affair in the first place.

In a nutshell, turning their attentions to another often salvages the relationship with the one that they love (providing they do not get caught out of course!) because through avoiding having to face their underlying issues, those feelings that make them want to run – they are able to switch off from that panic mode, and then return to the safety of their love nest once they realise that they have actually gone and cheated!

3) Yes we may have found the reason but no it is not acceptable! Help is at hand!

Of course, if you are on the receiving end of such behaviour, all of the theoretical explanations in the world won’t help with the lasting damage that infidelity can do not only to a relationship, but also to both individuals.

One thing that must be clarified, is that if you suspect that your partner could be living comfortably within the avoidant attachment personality zone, then you cannot make excuses for them and allow them to become too comfortable there, even if you can try and understand it.

Talking to your partner about your suspicions and making it clear that you are willing to support them through getting help is one way to handle things, but don’t allow yourself to become a doormat.

If he or she thinks that they can excuse their behaviour every time, then you will soon find them repeating the cycle over and over, until you cannot take it any more.

4) It all comes down to FEAR. Are you going to let it kick YOUR ass?

Understand together, that the fuel that feeds the compulsion to run, is fear and as long as fear is given this incredible power, then your partner (and also yourself) are actually living as victims of an emotion – an emotion that we can actually learn to master.

Seeking some form of couples therapy would be a good place to initially look at how to tackle this issue, and perhaps the one who is cheating could work on the underlying issues via individual treatment.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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49 Signs Of A Cheating Partner

kajay — Fri, 07 Jan 2011 22:41:56 +0000

Lately things just aren’t the same with your partner. Something seems off, and you can’t help but wonder if there’s somebody else.

Suspecting your partner of cheating can be tricky. The possibility terrifies you, but you’re also afraid of being wrong and looking like a fool who has trust issues. In a situation like this, it is wise to tread carefully.

Make sure that there are legitimate reasons for suspecting your partner, and that it’s not just your insecurity that is skewing your point of view.

If you do have an overwhelming feeling that there may be infidelity in your relationship then read on for common signs of cheating, and compare them with your man or lady’s behavior.

1. Change In long held beliefs: You observe a shift in your partner’s attitude about relationships or love.

It may be that your man used to condemn husbands who cheat on their wives and had strong opinions about infidelity. Suddenly, they seem more lenient with their thinking.

Maybe you’re watching TV together one night and there’s news of a celebrity couple breaking up because the man cheated.

You are appalled, but he might shrug and say something like “Well, if she stopped having sex with him what do you expect?”

Pay attention to changes in long held beliefs that your partner had, he or she may be altering their view to accommodate their new thinking or behavior.

2. Trading in khakis for miniskirts: If you have known your partner for a while, then you might start noticing sudden changes in the way they dress or want to look.

If your lady has always been very taken with her appearance, and she buys new clothes or changes her hair, it may not be a cause for alarm.

However, if she used to dress like a frumpy grandmother to work and she’s suddenly wearing miniskirts and high heels, then you may have a problem.

There might be a co-worker she’s trying to impress or someone else she’s meeting for lunch or after work drinks.

If this is a man, and he suddenly starts caring about his bald spot that he’s had for twenty years or his graying hair that he didn’t care about before, he may be trying to look younger to impress another woman.

3. Newfound body image issues: A sudden and unjustified change in body image is another major infidelity sign.

If your partner has taken the decision to be thinner or more muscular for health reasons or has always been fit there’s probably no reason to doubt anything.

However, if your couch potato husband is not really concerned with his health, but suddenly starts spending hours in the gym because he is now obsessed with getting rid of his belly fat, then take a closer look.

Also, if he refuses that you accompany him to the gym, or is presenting otherwise sketchy behavior regarding his body, he may be straying.

4. I want to be alone: Your partner suddenly wants to spend a lot of time on their own.

The need for space is a major sign that something is going on especially if this request comes out of nowhere and with no valid explanation.

If you two had a fight and he or she is still resentful, then the need for space can be somewhat understood.

However, if your relationship is stable and things are going great, and your partner suddenly wants to be alone, there might be someone else filling that void.

5. Picking fights: The man or woman in your life might also not only demand more space but do everything possible to create more of it.

He or she might pick fights for no reason, and may make an issue of every little thing to create an illusion that you’re not getting along.

They do this to legitimize their wrongdoings and to feel less guilty. The way they figure is this; since you’re both always fighting, you are the unreasonable one and you are pushing them into another person’s arms.

6. Storming out of the house: On a related note, if your man or woman storms out after a “fight” because they just can’t take it anymore and say that they need some time to think, they may be using it as an opportunity to meet up with the other person. This technique has two major benefits.

First, it gives him or her more time on their own to cheat. Second, they can use the fights as a lever to gain the sympathy of the other person who they are cheating with.

They want the other man or woman to stay in the deceitful relationship.

So they complain about their partner to demonstrate that they are being driven to cheat and so it isn’t their fault. So if every time you fight with your partner, he or she storms out there may be a good reason why.

7. Reverse psychology: When someone is cheating, he or she becomes a master manipulator.

If you start noticing that your once earnest and direct partner is using reverse psychology and other weird techniques that they didn’t use before, then know that something is up.

If he or she always makes it seem that you’re the one in the wrong no matter what happens. He or she may have something to hide.

8. On the defensive: If your man or lady has suddenly become overly defensive and can’t take any type of criticism, then you need to take a good look at what’s going on.

If you ask him about a lady co-worker and he starts a fight, or he becomes furious after you ask him why he didn’t call if he was going to be late for dinner, there’s something there.

Ask your partner about it, maybe there’s a good reason for this newly found oversensitivity and short temper. A stressful work week or family problems may be to blame for this change in behavior.

9. Lying through their teeth: Cheating always involves lying. If you keep catching your partner in little lies, then something is up.

If he said he was working late the night before at the office, then says that he was out with his boss having drinks another time, beware he may be cheating.

If the little things he or she says just don’t add up, then ask them about it. If they avoid confronting the issue, you can be sure that there’s something going on that shouldn’t be.

10. Going the distance: If your partner is cheating, then he or she may deal by becoming more distant. He will avoid talking about serious subjects and only engage in small talk.

He may avoid getting into conversations about your finances, work, and children if you have them or any future plans.

He or she will always seem to have something on their mind and you can’t seem to connect with them on a deeper level like you used to.

11. Emotional detachment: Your partner might also disengage emotionally from your relationship.

Your man used to be extremely affectionate and loving, but now you can’t get an “I love you” out of him. There might be something wrong. You’ll want to ask him why he has become emotionally detached.

He might be upset with you over something you did and is acting out, so talking about it is very important.

If he just shrugs or refuses to even acknowledge his behavior or even blames you for being paranoid, something deeper might be festering under his aloof exterior and you need to be careful.

12. Loves being out alone, hates staying in with you: Does your partner seem upbeat when he or she gets home or when they are getting ready to go out, but seems gloomy while he or she is spending time with you?

If you don’t have any problems in your relationship that may be causing this change in behavior, then it might be that your partner is excited about something going on outside the home, something like a juicy affair.

13. Affection overload: Some other cheaters act in an entirely different manner due to overwhelming feelings of guilt.

They will shower their partners with affection, gifts and caring words. They might be even more romantic than usual and more attentive.

If this shift is sudden and you cannot find a logical or even an illogical explanation for it, then ask your partner what brought this on, they may be able to reassure you and give you a valid explanation.

If you still can’t understand this behavior, it might be that your partner is cheating and using this as a decoy so you won’t suspect anything.

14. Chatter away: On a related note, if your usually silent partner suddenly becomes a chatterbox, then beware.

Sometimes people who lie tend to over talk or give more information than was asked for to cover up other things. Observe this new behavior for a while, and bring it up to them if it bothers you.

15. Working a lot of overtime: One of the most obvious cheating signs is your partner keeps working overtime when this was never the case before. He or she suddenly becomes the most valuable and hardest working employee in their company.

This doesn’t always mean that your partner is cheating on you; there might be a special project that needs to be done before a certain deadline or it’s the end of the year and there’s a lot of work that needs to be done.

However, if your partner seems to be the only one working overtime, and other employees don’t seem to know anything about it, then there might be something fishy going on.

16. Do not enter-work zone: If your partner used to involve you in his or her work life.

Telling you all about work, inviting you to company events like picnics, having you over to meet them for lunch but suddenly starts cutting you off, something might not be right.

Maybe he or she doesn’t want you around their workplace because there’s someone they don’t want you to know about or there is something that they are hiding like all those extra projects they were working on late were fictional.

If you do see any of your partner’s co-workers, they may act very uncomfortable in your presence. If there is no valid explanation for this, something might be going on behind your back.

17. Buddies no more: Similarly, if your man used to invite his buddies over for Sunday night football or Thursday night Basketball every week, and suddenly stops having them over, it may be because he is afraid that they will spill his secret or not corroborate his stories.

If he starts meeting with them outside more and more, he may also be using them as his alibi for getting out of the house.

He may be keeping you apart from them because he’s afraid that they might accidently or intentionally divulge his secret.

18. Awkward friend situation: Also it may be that your man or lady’s friends keep avoiding you even though you all used to be very close.

Your girlfriend or wife’s friends might do everything in their power to not see you because they can’t face you if they know of their friend’s cheating.

They might also be afraid of saying anything that would compromise your relationship and most people do not want to be a part of that.

So they might avoid you all together so as not to find themselves in an awkward situation.

19. Bye Bye old interests: If your partner suddenly loses interest in activities which he used to love, then there might be something weird going on.

If your man, out of the blue, starts to hate playing sports when he used to live and breathe soccer, or he stops spending his free time gardening on the weekends, then there might someone else in his life that is bringing on those changes.

20. Marriage blues: If you are married, and you notice that your husband or wife starts acting hostile or bored towards you, your children or your home life in general, there might be something fishy going on.

He or she might start making references to how they misses being single or how hard it is to be married.

He or she might get rid of your children’s toys in the car or anything that demonstrates that they have a family.

They may be cheating with someone and are lying to them about being married with children, and so they suddenly start rejecting their marital status.

21. Beware of the Lazy pants: If your spouse used to be active around the house doing laundry, feeding the kids, mowing the lawn, and suddenly starts becoming lazy and uncooperative, he or she may be feeling negatively towards the very notion of being married and sharing your home.

They don’t even want to try anymore, and this includes doing chores, planning family outings and vacations.

They might not even want to attend important events such as holidays, anniversaries or birthday parties. This is especially suspicious if they never really had any issue with doing these things before.

22. Strange outings: Another sign that your partner may be straying is that he or she begins to go out to new places at strange times, and never has a convincing answer as to why this is.

He used to hate food shopping, suddenly he insists on doing the weekly grocery shopping, and doesn’t want you to come along.

She used to deeply despise anything arty, and out of the blue, one Saturday has an outing to go to an art museum with friends.

You know your partner inside and out, so if you notice changes in their favorite activities with no valid explanation, something is up.

23. Sneaking out like a teenager: If your partner is sneaking out, then he or she may have something to hide.

The reason they may be going out behind your back is usually to avoid scrutinizing questions and wants to avoid lying to you.

If he or she has nothing to hide then letting you know that they are on their way out shouldn’t be such a secretive matter, so beware of increased sneakiness and secrecy.

24. Is your partner an undercover agent?: You may find out that your partner has a new means of communication that you don’t know about.

This includes a new e-mail address, a Facebook account under a pseudonym or nickname, a new cell phone and phone number. All of these are big red flags that you should immediately take notice of.

You should know about all the phone numbers, email addresses and other means of communication your partner uses. This is not something that should be private and any concealment can be taken as a sign of cheating.

25. Financial infidelity: Another major sign of cheating is the odd use of money and/or credit cards.

If you are used to sharing financial data between you and your partner, and he or she suddenly starts hiding credit card statements or disabling your access to an online checking account to hide cash withdrawals or other new spending habits, something weird is going on.

Of course it could be that your man has bought you a car for your birthday and doesn’t want you to find out ahead of time, but if this isn’t the case, do ask him or her or investigate the matter further on your own first.

26. Is this my partner talking?: If your partner is having an affair, then he or she might start using different language than he used to.

This includes telling more or less jokes, or using certain catch phrases. He or she may even adopt a certain way of talking or an accent that is inspired by someone else.

We tend to emulate people that we like and hang around with often. So if this is happening in your relationship, pay attention and ask your partner about it.

27. Your partner becomes jumpy and frazzled: Your man or lady might easily get disturbed or confused by mundane things.

If you do something nice for him or her, they act strange. This is because they want to vilify you to justify their wrongdoing, and your nice behavior catches them off guard.

They might act disoriented and jumpy for no apparent reason.

This can be a cheating sign because your partner is trying to sort out his or her feelings about your relationship but also the affair, and is likely to present erratic and unstable behavior as a result.

28. Country music anyone?: If your partner suddenly starts developing new taste in music or in food, then you might want to question him or her about it.

It may be that they are dating someone who is fond of a certain cuisine or music, and they are beginning to take a liking to it.

Developing new tastes out of the blue can be a revealing sign that your partner has found someone new to be devoted to.

29. What’s up with the Brazilian?: Another infidelity sign is a sudden change in personal hygiene and body grooming habits.

If your man used to shower every morning and is suddenly taking several showers a day for no apparent reason, there might be something going on.

If your lady didn’t used to pay attention to her private parts being groomed, and begins getting Brazilian bikini waxes, she might be trying to impress someone else.

He or she may also buy new underwear and use it, or may start putting on a lot of perfume or after shave. Pay attention to these little details if you suspect your partner of cheating.

30. Condoms away!: Another sign that there might be a sexual affair going is the increased use of contraceptive methods.

Is she on the pill when you have gotten a vasectomy? Is he carrying out condoms when you are on the pill and haven’t used condoms since high school?

If there is no valid explanation for this behavior, then this is a big red flag that your partner may be cheating.

31. Blue pill wonders: Another sign of cheating is that your partner is suddenly interested in purchasing medication for sexual performance.

He may get erectile dysfunction medication such as Viagra. She might order breast enlargement herbal supplements or lubricant for herself.

This is especially suspicious if it is done secretively through online ordering or he or she hides the objects once they arrive or takes them in secret.

32. The answer lies in clothes: There may be unexplained stains, smells or rips on your partner’s clothing.

This may include the clichéd lipstick smudge on your man’s shirt, but also other types of stains and smells that just aren’t typical of your partner’s clothes.

This can also lead to suddenly excessive laundry washing at weird hours of the day or night, unexplained purchasing of new clothes, or finding clothes in the trash can that your partner may have thrown away to hide evidence.

33. Knock knock, is anyone in there?: Your partner may be caught daydreaming or checked out at many times during the day, and doesn’t tell you what they’re thinking about and is unwilling to interact.

He or she seems to be in another world, but denies it and can’t seem to be bothered to engage in activities with you.

Your partner may just be absorbed by work or something else might be bothering them. Don’t be quick to assume that they’re thinking of somebody else, but if this becomes excessive and no good explanation is given for it, then he or she might be cheating.

34. Are you more likely to reach President Obama on the phone than your partner?: Your partner suddenly becomes impossible to reach.

When you call the office, they are always at a meeting or on another call with an important client.

Their cell phone is turned off on more than one occasion, and the cell phone reception in their building is suddenly the “worst.”

Your partner may not call you back right away, or claims to not have received your calls or listened to your messages.

Their assistant or receptionist is all of the sudden the most incompetent person on earth. In short, the fact that they have become inaccessible is everyone else’s fault but their own.

All the flimsy excuses in the world cannot hide the fact that there is something sketchy going on in your partner’s life.

35. No, it’s mine!: With the advent of new technologies, there is a multitude of ways one can keep in touch with someone else.

If you and your partner used to share phones and laptops, and keep them on in each other’s presence and this suddenly changes, there is a reason for that.

You used to look at your man’s cell phone, read his text messages and he never even flinched.

All of the sudden, his phone has become so precious to him that he eve takes it into the bathroom. If you take a look at it, he accuses you of snooping.

His laptop, which used to be your computer as well, suddenly has password protection. All of these are telltale signs that he might have something to hide.

36. Delete all: If he still allows you to touch or use his or her phone, or laptop, you find that he or she always makes sure that browser history and cookies are deleted, that their contact list is cleaned up, and incoming e-mails erased.

Maybe they’re just embarrassed of some pages they visited, but more likely, he or she may be hiding their online contact with a lover.

Similarly, if his or her phone’s message list or call log is always empty, they just might be hiding something or someone from you. Look into this.

37. He or she becomes a night owl: Your partner might spend a lot of time on their computers especially late at night and after you go to bed.

Sure, your man might be a porn addict, but he may also be contacting another woman.

On a related note, your partner might start talking more and more on their cell phones, and racking up huge bills.

To sum it up, if there is a sudden, unexplained change in telephone or computer usage with your partner, there may be something strange going on.

38. Your opinion and advice don’t matter anymore: Another sign that your partner might be infidel is he or she stops seeking out your advice or your opinion about major decisions in their lives.

They might make irresponsible big purchases or act impulsively without talking with you first. Maybe he went and spent all of his savings on a boat that you never knew about.

Maybe she decided to put up your house on the market without consulting you first. They may have quit their jobs and not even told you about it.

This type of rash behavior is typical of a cheater who just doesn’t care about planning your future together anymore and doesn’t even care to ask what you think beforehand.

39. Your partner becomes a world champion nagger: A cheating partner may begin to constantly complain about you or your relationship and how unhappy he or she is.

They may be overly critical of you, and suggest that things aren’t working out. He or she may pick more fights to prove this point and makes no effort to make things work.

At this point, your partner may be having an affair but also thinking of ending your relationship.

Now, if you do have genuine problems between you that you are working on, then there is probably nothing to worry about.

However, if everything is going fine in your relationship and you do get along; your partner may be fabricating a broken relationship to justify not only his or her cheating, but also their leaving.

40. Sex? No thanks: If your partner is cheating on you, he may suddenly lose interest in having sex with you.

Even if he or she does, they’ll just go through the motions, with no shared feelings or emotions. If it’s there any sex at all, it becomes just physical.

If your partner has always been a passionate lover and suddenly becomes detached or cold in lovemaking for no good reason, there may be somebody else.

41. Who are you and what have you done with my wife?: If on the other hand, your man or lady usually is usually more reserved and subdued in bed, and suddenly becomes an extremely attentive and passionate lover with exaggerated displays of affection, they may be overcompensating to deal with their feelings of guilt.

They may suggest you try new things in bed and become more adventurous. Ask them where they got this newfound fervor, and if there’s a valid explanation, then just enjoy.

Otherwise stay alert. This change in sexual behavior might be a result of infidelity.

42. Extreme changes in feelings and behavior: Your partner may at times be very sexually engaged and at other times be completely withdrawn.

Sometimes they shower you with affection, and other times they hardy want to talk to you and seem to avoid you.

Although, there may be good explanations for this type of unpredictable and erratic behavior, it is something to watch out for, especially if your partner used to be fairly consistent.

It may be that they are cheating and are confused about their affair, thus taking out their mixed feelings on you.

43. He or she has become a complete downer: Has your partner been generally unsatisfied with their life lately even though they used to be happy?

Is he or she much more negative than they used to be? This may be due to an exciting affair that they are having which has demonstrated to them how mundane their current life is.

Have they become confused about their own sense of self? Maybe there is someone new in your partner’s life who is calling into question their identity and who they are.

44. Bungee jumping, here I come: On a related note, is your partner suddenly a thrill seeker when you could never even get them to go on a child’s water slide ride at your local amusement park?

Does he suddenly want to get a motorcycle or a tattoo and signs up for mountain climbing classes? Of course, this might just be a mid-life crisis talking.

However, there’s always the possibility that there is someone else, perhaps somebody younger in your partner’s life that is instigating this transformation and inspiring this new attitude.

45. Low self-esteem: Another sign that your partner may be cheating is that he or she has increasingly low self esteem.

This means that your partner is vulnerable and can fall prey to cheating because he or she cannot make themselves feel secure and worthy.

If they believe that you are not providing them with enough approval or love and just aren’t getting satisfaction from their job, they might go to someone else from whom they can obtain the desired feelings of security and self worth.

Of course this doesn’t mean that if your partner cheats, this is your fault; your partner should have come to you first to resolve his or her issues, and low self esteem is no excuse for bad behavior.

46. Gonorrhea, herpes anyone?: A concrete sign that your partner may be straying is you have proof that they have contracted a sexually transmitted disease (STD) and it wasn’t from you.

Maybe you got a call from your husband’s physician, or intercepted an email, or found lab results by mistake. You may even have seen the actual STD on your partner’s body.

If this is the case and he or she has only gotten the disease recently, then your partner is not only straying but might even have contaminated you.

So get yourself checked. If you have also gotten the STD and you have not engaged in sexual relations with a new partner, then this only serves to confirm your suspicions that your partner has been cheating on you.

47. The “friend” you never got to meet: A tangible sign of cheating is that someone new suddenly starts taking up your partner’s time and attention.

Whether it’s a co-worker, a gym partner, or a friend from way back, this person seems to come out of the blue and he or she starts coming up in conversations and in future plans all the time.

Your partner brings up this mysterious friend in random conversation and they always seem to be at the right place at the right time and at social gatherings you weren’t attending.

Although it is healthy to seek out new friendships, it is a big red flag if your partner refuses to introduce you to this new friend and wants to keep him or her under wraps.

48. I’m a cheater? No you’re the cheater, you cheater: A telltale sign that your partner might be cheating is that they turn around and accuse you of straying when you have given them no reason to doubt you.

Of course, there’s always the possibility that they’re just jealous or are feeling insecure in the relationship.

However, if you have reassured them of your unconditional love and have done more than enough to placate their anxiety, and they’re still accusing you left and right, something is definitely wrong.

The reason they may be doing this if they’re cheating is to deflect attention from their own behavior.

They may also genuinely believe that you’re cheating because they become paranoid and start imagining their own deceptive tactics everywhere.

Don’t fall into this trap, and don’t start accusing them of cheating either, look out for other signs to be sure.

49. Follow your gut: The biggest sign that your partner may be cheating is that there is something deep inside of you that is making you doubt him or her in the first place.

Think about it; you know your partner better than anyone.

Their habits, actions and behaviors are hardwired into your brain, and so if you feel it in your gut that there’s something wrong, then follow your instincts. It might turn out to be true.

As you can see there are many signs a partner can exhibit if they are cheating. However, none of them are proof that your man or lady is straying.

A combination of these signs should definitely constitute a wakeup call that there are problems in your relationship you both need to deal with.

Use this as an opportunity to explore your unresolved issues, address them and build a better quality relationship.

If you are sure that your partner is cheating, then definitely be more vigilant and aware, and use this time to find hard proof before you accuse them of anything.

Otherwise, your partner can just deny it all. Finally, you don’t want to seem paranoid if there is nothing there, and a continuous lack of trust can ultimately cause your relationship to turn sour.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Why Do Men Have Affairs?

kajay — Wed, 05 Jan 2011 13:55:57 +0000

In recent times most of the men are having extramarital affairs either at their workplace or at social life. So why do men have affairs?

Just have a look at some common reasons, for which men get involved in such extramarital affairs, leaving monogamy far behind.

Adultery may be counted as one of the prime reason for such affairs, while there are others who are opportunists and do perform as and when they get options.

Our society never blames these men for such relations rather it blames the women as a tradition, for any extramarital affairs between a couples.

Actually there is a need to make a solid decision for both, the men and the women, before entering into any such relationship.

Do you think that all the men and women having extramarital affairs as – bad? No not really! As a matter of fact, getting good or bad has nothing to do with this.

Everything is dependent on person’s personal life and hjis/her relationships status with the existing partner. If you get a survey, you will find that starting from President to your neighbors, almost everyone have had such affairs.

So that doesn’t means that there are too many ‘bad’ people in the society.

So there is a need to discover, still that why do men have affairs?

The reason may be counted a many, depending on the personal lifestyle of a particular person. Though there are some circumstances under which men may want to have an extramarital affair:

There is a great difference between a mild flirting and a full fledged infidelity.

The concept someone who hasn’t promised to love you ceaselessly and isn’t sure to you by the ties of family and finance, would possibly see in you an attractiveness, that you’re unsure still exists, is admittedly intoxicating for any married man.

Nonetheless, what are the reasons that push him in direction of crossing the skinny line between flirting to having an affair?

The Ego Trip: Males typically have affairs so as to spice up their ego (They want their cake and their ice cream!). Low self esteem seems to be a significant cause for infidelity in men.

Attention and acknowledgment from somebody makes males feel particular and develop into emotionally attached to them.

Dissatisfaction: Dissatisfaction in the present relationship and other marital problems can tempt males to cheat on their wives.

After marriage and especially after having a child most ladies tend to slack off from preserving themselves fit and searching good.

Most of the conversations of the married girls I know are inclined to veer across the youngsters, the leaking taps and how costly groceries have become.

Thus, a component of physical and emotional dissatisfaction seems to creep into the relationship.

Additionally, a spouse who has not acquired the love and companionship from his partner would possibly seek it elsewhere.

Excitement and Adventure: As your lives fall into the boring routines of married life, your thoughts shout out for pleasure and adventure.

Males search the thrills of secret meetings with a new lover, coupled with the danger of getting caught to spice up their lives.

Intercourse: Vanilla sex (conventional, boring intercourse) is got to be the commonest motive that every one dishonest male give for his or her wayward ways.

In situations where the sex in the marriage becomes infrequent, routine, boring and unengaging and where the ladies appears to be “putting up with it” to keep their males completely satisfied, and making sure their husbands know that, possibilities of males seeking an affair are greatly increased.

Revenge: It’s shocking however one of the most frequent reasons for men having affairs is because their wives had an affair.

Taking part in the tit for tat game makes males feel a way of justification for their partner’s betrayal.

The Escape Route: As males feel trapped of their roles as a homemaker, breadwinner, affairs function an escape route from all of the household pressures.

There are not any set definitions or reasons why men have affairs.

Keep in mind that it is by means of miscommunication, break of belief, always arguing over the identical things, that men discover somebody who they assume is more appropriate with them compared to their partner.

Yes, these indicators of an affair will help you work out a solution for why do men have affairs and help resolving the connection points with the spouse and assist you to save from the disasters of a divorce.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Digital Infidelity

kajay — Tue, 04 Jan 2011 22:23:02 +0000

Digital Infidelity has become a growing problem all over the world in the midst of the advancement of technology through the access on the internet.

Nowadays, it is easy to hook up and meet other people using the computers, laptops or notebooks.

People interact using the latest gadgets and spend hours chatting and making video calls online.

What a convenient way to interact with other people who are thousands of miles away from each other. Just one click of the button and connection to the internet will make things happen for them.

People find the idea exhilarating when they pretend to be other people. Some people find it hard to reveal their true selves so they pretend that they are somebody else.

Such activity gives them the adrenaline rush, which they might need to add spice and color in their boring lives.

With almost 90% of the global population addicted to internet these days, everybody opens up himself to the idea of making friends and meeting people for the first time using social networking sites like Facebook, Twitter, My Space or Friendster.

These networking sites will unlock their doors to several possibilities like sexual infidelity, role-playing games and emotional association.

Everyone is a player here.

Single people who are in existing relationships and most especially married, people take advantage by pretending they are free to enter new relationships, but in truth, they are not. In effect, the marriage and relationships suffer because the partners engage in forbidden affairs.

What is Cyber Sex?

The internet is an avenue to fulfil the sexual fantasies of thrill seekers. Some people find gratification in hook-ups online.

They just use the web cam and they do foreplay while satisfying their sexual urges without doing the actual act.

For them they find satisfaction in living in a make-believe world. This is something new to them and they can engage in multiple partners after ending a conversation with one acquaintance.

This activity greatly affects the married life of couples. The husband or the wife who seeks sexual pleasures from online partners clearly disrupts the married couple’s relationship.

The focus of the other partner is divided because his addiction to cyber sex eats up most of his time and attention.

This is a form of cheating because one person who is committed is lying and being dishonest to his partner. Betrayal and distrust can ruin any marriage. It is a sad to believe but this has become a fact.

It has become the cause of divorce and separation of a great number of wedded couples who used-to-be happily married.

Watching Pornography Online

Watching pornography online increases the sexual appetites of partners who are no longer physically attracted to their mates.

They enticed by the allure of other individuals who catch their attention by the way they dress, walk and talk or how they carry themselves.

Being fascinated to another person draws the other partner to give in to his sexual desires.

By watching pornography online, a person’s libido is increased. A person feels empowered when his sexual drive increases.

Married couples experience sexual problems. Sometimes, when a partner is no longer drawn to his mate, he/she does not have the craving to get in bed with him/her.

Or most of the time, sex is no longer present in the relationship because they feel tired due to work or overwhelmed by stress caused by their kids or obligations in the home.

The uninterested partner now wants to pep up to his jaded life or daily routine, so his immediate escape is to watch pornography and readily available online.

Sex can be addictive. It sends out pleasurable experiences, momentary bliss and short-lived ecstasy.

Seeking carnal knowledge outside of the home may be gratifying to some men or women. But the effect of this marital infidelity is destructive in a relationship.

The hate and resentment of the partner will have a great impact in the family home. Children will be affected and eventually, the couple resort to end the agony through divorce.

The long-term effect of infidelity will divide the family and later destroy the future of their kids.

Swingers

A married person who is tired of his partner will engage in another married person just to have sex and to satisfy his urges and fantasies, which which he cannot get from his partner at home.

The same thing goes to the other spouse who seeks sexual gratification from another person.

Both spouses give their consent in exchanging sexual partners in order to zest up their relationship.

They find their sex partners on the internet by entering pornographic websites and checking- out who are willing to lie in bed with them, all for the sake of lust and thirst for sex.

This act is morally disturbing because this is not an accepted norm in the human society.

This is shocking to the moral senses and can be considered as a barbaric act only practiced by animals for they do not have brains to think and distinguish right from wrong are.

However, this modern ideology of other married couples is not practiced by majority of human beings.

Many of us still value fidelity and loyalty to only one partner. Sadly, statistics show that infidelity cases have tremendously gone up. In this age and time, the main source of pornography is the internet.

Being faithful is a difficult mission every married couple should take by heart. With the proliferation of pornography online, one cannot close his/her eyes to the evil temptations surrounding our society.

We are only humans and sometimes although the mind wills you to be morally upright, the body or the flesh is weak.

To avoid this, we should be able to establish strong ties with our mates in our current relationships and work hard to keep it the passion alive. Some people are lazy to go the extra mile to nurture and save their relationships.

They find the easy way out and pleasure themselves with sinful luxury of watching pornography online and engage in virtual sex play without having actual sex. The end- result is digital infidelity.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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I Think My Boyfriend Is Emotionally Cheating On Me- What Should I Do?

kajay — Sat, 01 Jan 2011 13:58:18 +0000

Question: Hello, I think my boyfriend is still emotionally attached to his ex and when I ask him about it, he assures me that there is nothing to worry about it. Should I be concerned, what should I do?

Answer: Hi there,

Suspecting your partner of having feelings for anyone besides yourself can be very painful, and I understand your turmoil.

In your case, you think that your boyfriend might still be emotionally attached to his ex, and you’re not sure if there is anything to worry about.

I hope that some of these answers will be useful to you and help you understand what is going on.

Emotional attachment to anyone besides your significant other is called emotional infidelity. That is not to say that you should not have any friends, but there is a certain boundary that separates the two.

Platonic relationships between men and women are possible, but they can spell trouble for a couple if certain lines are crossed. The fact that an ex is involved makes things that much more complicated.

If you are sure that your boyfriend is not having sex with anyone besides yourself, but are still worried about his emotional fidelity to you, read on to see whether your boyfriend’s ex is a threat to your relationship or not.

1- Is your boyfriend still in contact with his ex? Does he still talk to her constantly on the phone or on the internet? If he is in contact with her, does he do it in front of you, or does he talk to her in private? In short, are you aware of all the communication that goes on between them?

If you are, then your boyfriend probably has nothing to hide, but if their communication makes you uncomfortable, and who can blame you?

You should talk it out with your partner and tell him that you prefer that he didn’t contact his ex anymore. If he values your relationship enough, then he should understand.

Don’t let him turn this around, and make you feel like you’re the unreasonable one. If they really are just friends, then they should be able to respect your wishes and cease all communication.

If after this, they still talk to each other, especially behind your back, you might have a case of emotional infidelity on your hands.

2- Has your boyfriend recently seemed emotionally unavailable or detached from you? If you feel like your man is withdrawing for no apparent reason, then you should ask him about it because it may be that he has become emotionally invested somewhere else.

Maybe you noticed that your boyfriend doesn’t tell you about what goes on in his life like he used to, or doesn’t tell you I love you as much. The fact that there is an ex in the picture can make you even more suspicious.

If he’s in contact with her and you hear them talking or catch him telling her things that he’s not telling you, and you feel like he has become emotionally closer to her than to you then that is a red flag you should definitely not ignore.

3- Does your boyfriend spend less and less time with you? Did you used to go everywhere together and then suddenly you feel like he’s leading a double life.

He seems preoccupied and doesn’t want to engage in activities with you like before.

He may be on the computer more often for non-work related activities or spends more time on the phone and claims it’s just a co worker.

If your boyfriend is physically there, but doesn’t enjoy spending time with you like he used to, then there may be emotional infidelity going on.

4- Is your boyfriend not as sexually interested in you anymore? If he used to be all over you, and then suddenly retracts, there’s something going on.

You know that he’s not having sex with anyone else, yet he’s still avoiding intimacy with you.

Ask him about it, it may be that he is just stressed out from work, but since there is an ex that you’re worried about, it is imperative that he give you a good explanation for his sudden change of behavior.

5- Another sign of emotional infidelity is that your boyfriend suddenly becomes overly critical of you; your actions, your appearance, your words.

Nothing you do seems to be right for him anymore, and he devalues you and becomes negative about you or your relationship in general.

6- If you have specifically asked your boyfriend to cease all contact with his ex, and you’re still finding her number on his call log or emails between them, then there is definitely emotional cheating going on.

Check his phone bills, and web history to confirm this before you thrash around accusations. They may not be physically attached, but emotionally, he seems to still be very taken with her, and that is not okay when you are in a committed relationship with someone else.

If any of these emotional infidelity signs are ringing bells for you, then you need to explore the issue further. If your partner is still in contact with his ex, set boundaries, and demand that he respect them.

If he does, and he’s not displaying any emotional attachment signs to her, and is back to being his regular self, then their relationship was probably platonic and you had nothing to worry about.

However, if your boyfriend is still talking to his ex after you told him not to, or he is doing it behind your back, and he is also exhibiting any of the emotional cheating signs, then you need to decide whether you want to stay with him or not.

Emotional infidelity is different than physical infidelity in that there is usually no sex involved, but they are both equally painful and devastating.

Also, there is always a risk that an emotional affair can turn into full blown affair, so definitely be aware of what’s going on.

Most platonic relationships can seem perfectly innocent, but could spell disaster if certain boundaries are crossed.

If you want more information on whether your boyfriend is cheating on you and even catch him cheating with evidence, download my book, Bust A Cheating Partner at www.bustacheatingpartner.com.

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How To Catch A Cheating Partner

kajay — Mon, 27 Dec 2010 18:53:17 +0000

Stop being naive and start being more vigilant on the issue. If you feel that your partner has been cheating on you, it is time to have access on tools to get the hard evidences to prove your suspicions and end his/her hideous guilty pleasures.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

The answer to your investigation is surveillance tools. Yes, you in fact need some helpful tools to materialize precious evidences. The defense of denial will no longer be a hindrance.

The Technology of Surveillance:

The most common fact that technology has been serving us is “convenience.” No wonder, surveillance has ever been easy for detectives nowadays.

However, recommending a detective for you to produce materials that could be considered primary evidences would be too costly.

Getting yourself to do the act of surveillance has never been a breeze with the new technology at hand. Now that we have the modern-day tools, why not make use of them?

Here are the tools that you can get your hands on to start producing your own precious evidences against the cheating partner:

Cellphone Monitoring Software:

It is a software that is installed in a cellphone of your suspicious spouse or partner, of course. All the text messages, chats, and phone calls are recorded, undetected.

Available programs can be downloaded to the suspicious partner’s cellphone within 10 minutes and there you have it: your own personal detective right in your partner’s pocket! Sounds convenient?

Here’s more: most of these cellphone monitoring software even comes with a tracking device that logs in the whereabouts of your target at specified times.

Making sure that he/she is at the correct spot where the “activity” might be going on. All of these events can be kept securely via another computer as logging device and printed later on as hard evidences.

With just a couple of hundred bucks, you can avail of the software easily in the internet. A few clicks is all you need to get that surveillance started and going.

This is completely legal as of date until perhaps time comes that the government would make it otherwise.

Computer Monitoring Software:

The software used for monitoring your partner’s computer is as handy and convenient as the cellphone monitoring software.

The only difference would be obviously, you need this one installed in your cheating partner’s computer.

This surveillance tool needs to be installed for a few minutes and there you go: the spy that lurks in his/her own laptop or desktop! All the activities including keystrokes are gathered as data in the surveillance.

Chat sessions, browsing activities, as well as usernames and passwords are collected and can be printed on later to be used as proofs of his/her cheating activities.

The software also captures shots of the computer being monitored in assigned successions. The information collected can be fed into a database that should be connected to your own computer.

The cost of computer surveillance software ranges from a hundred to a couple of hundred bucks. But the service that it offers is worth it.

This form of monitoring device is applicable for a suspicious partner who uses the laptop or desktop most of the time of the day.

This is also recommended for those cheating partners who keep passwords in their pc’s and even purchase new laptops/desktops to exclusively hide their affairs in the internet.

Hidden Cameras:

If you need a moment-to-moment surveillance, hidden cameras will answer your needs. Though in the past, hidden cameras can’t capture those moments in dark places, there are new and highly advanced surveillance cameras available today.

These latest hidden cameras can cost you a few hundred bucks but again, it’s worth the cost. Installing the device has never been easy.

These new generation hidden cameras are small and wireless and can record hidden moments for even up to 30 feet away!

Yes, they can now record even in those hidden dark places or rooms with precision due to their night vision capture capability.

Additionally, the latest advancement in hidden camera technology allows you to see only the important events because of its motion activated system. These types of camera record only when there is motion detected in its view.

Just install the hidden camera to the room of your choice and start recording. Collect the captured video via a memory card installed inside the cam and gotcha!

GPS Tracking:

It is global positioning system tracking. A device that you put anywhere you think is appropriate (car seats, etc) that will allow you to track your partner wherever he/she is located.

This tracking device records up to 120 hours of surveillance.

The tracking system can record data such as location, speed, and time. To retrieve the data, just plug in the unit/device in your computer and the information can be displayed using an interface in the internet (Google Earth and Google Maps).

Other GPS tracking device offers a live monitoring of the whereabouts of the philandering partner. The price for this kind of tracking device is twice that of the regular one.

However, the accuracy and precision of data gathering is real-time and can be used as a very helpful proof for that direct interrogation while your partner is on the act of cheating.

Gather Your Proofs Now:

Deceivers would do their best to get away with their cheating activities. Hunches and suspicions can get lame and worse, can be taken against you by your cheating partner!

So why not start gathering the prima facie evidence by using surveillance tools that are worth your money. You cannot just pop out in front of your suspicious partner and nag him/her about your paranoia.

Materialize your paranoia and make the moment yours by laying down your cards. And like real cards, your evidences are as clear and material as the most tangible proofs in the world.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

Why Women Cheat?

kajay — Fri, 24 Dec 2010 15:23:16 +0000

The result of a data base rating poll revealed that among 9,400 women respondent, 49% admitted they had cheated on their man sometime during their marriage. The question now is the reason why women cheat.

Women today are given all the opportunities to cheat as the men. Lifestyle, technology and absence of value are considered the best reasons.

Although the number of cheating women has equaled the cheating men, there are many married women who are willing to jump on bed with another fellow.

According to a study made by American Sexual Behavior, 14% of married women are unfaithful compared to 22% of married men. So infidelity is still higher in men than in women.

Why women cheat can be understood by the following reasons:

Inadequate sex life

Despite the chores women performed at home, she wants to feel wanted which is fulfilled when her sex life is active. If her husband cannot satisfy her needs, she will seek for the thrill elsewhere.

Thrill seekers

There are women who cheat because they enjoy the thrill; they are the thrill seekers. Although they love their husbands and have no plan of leaving their families, they need a little something extra.

Some women are not just satisfied to have sex with one man. Some women are just full of sexual energy which will come out at the proper condition.

Self-esteem booster

Sex has a way of making women boost their self esteem by feeling attractive and passionate. The most common rationalization of infidelity from women is that they feel taken for granted.

When a woman feels like little more than a household drudge, attention from someone else becomes extremely seductive.

You can be in a relationship with a perfectly wonderful, loving man and still need extra affirmation that you are wonderful.

Sleeping with someone else is an easy way to remind yourself that you’re desirable.

Revenge or getting even for past mistakes

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned, as the saying goes.

Why women cheat can be her rationalization of revenge or getting even for wrongs done in the past. She has been hurt by her spouse betrayal so she wants to hurt him in the same way. Regain her trust, not only by words but by action.

Intimacy is absent

Relationship existing between couple is not just based on sex but their intimacy. How close are they connected with each other through kissing, petting, cuddling and through communication.

The couple no longer shares their time together. To improve closeness with your spouse, spend more quality time with the woman of the house and spend enjoyable activities together.

Wants to feel important

A woman’s job is 24/7. She wants to have her work recognized and appreciated.

When her spouse spends time in the golf course and does not acknowledge her efforts, she seeks attention elsewhere. Gratitude and appreciation must be expressed and house work shared.

Sex life is boring

Sex is the same all the time: the same person, same sex play, same position, same setting, etc. An affair is both thrilling and exciting. Spouse should avoid the same routine and do something adventurous.

A good way for breaking up

The woman cheats for it is a good reason for breaking up with you. She considers an affair an easy way out of the relationship. This makes communication an important factor in maintaining relationship.

The fire of love has extinguished

Even if home life is fine, the kids are okay and the hubby is good, some women gets bored and wants some excitement.

She feels that the passion of her love has been quenched and might be rekindled by some one else. A casual affair may be burn the flame once more.

The fairy tale notion of marriage is only in the book

When the romance fades and you realize your guy is not Prince Charming but a man with unpleasant habit that gets under your skin.

Women enter marriage with romantic expectations. Then Prince Charming is turn into a frog and the woman is in the look out for another prince.

There may be a hundred reasons why women cheat but being unfaithful is not a norm. Anyone who finds marriage unsatisfactory should wait until she become legally free to seek for another partner.

Adding up all the reasons why women cheat, it is a problem of her heart; neither her ego nor libido.

If only her partner keeps the lines of communication open, be supportive and encouraging and work at keeping that spark ignited, she will have no reason to stray.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Extramarital Affair

kajay — Thu, 23 Dec 2010 14:13:08 +0000

Marital affairs have been in existence since time immemorial in every society. In the present culture, it has become a norm and considered an added point to boost one’s self esteem and virility.

From the ethical and moral angle, an extramarital affair is like a serpent choking life out of a happy union. Extramarital affairs have caused millions of families to break down to the deterrent of their lives and children.

The bond of marriage snaps when marital affairs come along. So destructive is this kind of affair that most of the time, recovery is impossible.

The lives of many couples have been destroyed making them sink into depression. It can be the saddest experience.

What makes an extramarital affair so emotionally devastating is that:

1. It is clearly a betrayal and broken trust;
2. It causes jealousy, deep emotional shock, and mental disturbance;
3. It results in humiliation and despair; and
4. It makes the sexual act a giant tormenter that won’t disappear.

Since marriage is a sacred trust there should be no room for any extramarital affair. In this state, there is no peace of mind only guilt and mental anguish. And there is no clear answer why?

One finger points to drinking as the culprit of extramarital affairs. But is the effect of alcohol expected to accomplish?

To fog the mind to facilitate the act or does it awakened an underlying problem originating from childhood.

It is difficult to identify the exact reason for the act. The grieved partner of an unfaithful spouse feels humiliated.

Their self-esteem has been shattered. Communication is broken so there is no way to solve the problem.

Their closeness is dissolved and their relation can never be the same again. Maybe time will heal all wounds but it takes years and the scars will always remain.

Other couples hold on to their relationship because of a flickering glow of love or saving it for the sake of the kids. But there will always be a strain between them.

In many instances, one partner will feel something amiss but cannot clearly communicate with the partner. There will be a gap between them. What is needed is openness and constant communication.

Talk openly and be honest to express your feelings and needs. If couples love each other they will find a way to satisfy these feelings and needs.

Loving is a two-way street, when you love you will also be loved in return. Communication is also two-way; communicate and you will receive a reply.

Conducting an extramarital affair is not a way to satisfy your needs. This happens when the partner ceases to listen and ignores any problem hoping it will go away.

As time goes on, the problems get more and more serious until it is beyond any solution. Do not take your partner for granted; be a good listener and talker at the same time.

Every couple must make an effort to avoid the enticement of the marital affair; something can be done like the following:

Make an effort to resolve every marital dispute: Do not allow it to continue overnight; it must be settled immediately. By making they stay for a while will worsen the problem creating a wedge that will keep the couple apart.

When issues remain unsettled, home becomes an unpleasant place so the partner would rather stay away and be open to temptation.

Do not talk about your domestic problem outside your home. Your spouse should only be your confidante. Envious people might misinterpret your confidences and complicate matters.

Your friends might even challenge you to start an affair to relieve your domestic distress.

Try to make your marriage interesting: create a happy and an interesting place to be, rather than looking for where to find love, interest, peace and care.

Improve your relationship by being more interesting. Learn to play, to flirt and do marvelous things with your spouse.

Go for a stroll often, enjoy a movie and have a date and see interesting sites. These increases closeness and minimizes the lure of the outside.

Avoid the company with the opposite sex as it might create sexual attraction. Minimize being alone with the opposite sex especially in the office or anywhere else.

Make yourself physically attractive and fun to be with. Admire and compliment your partner so he/she will feel confident and appreciated. When you are attractive to each other, temptation to stray is nil.

If you and your partner would like to preserve the bond of you marriage, then you have to exert extra effort not to be led into the temptation of an extramarital affair.

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Emotional Affair

kajay — Thu, 23 Dec 2010 14:02:54 +0000

Fidelity is an important component of a good relationship. However, it is true that every stable relationship faces several threats.

One is an emotional affair.

Can this type of affair be a deterrent to a stable relationship?

An “emotional affair” is a happening or event, which omits or leaves out any physical intimacy but involves emotional intimacy. It starts innocently as friendship and could aptly be termed an affair of the heart.

In this affair, one partner enters into monogamous relationship; an emotional affair is a type of chaste nonmonogamy without consummation. When the affair ends the monogamous relationship, infidelity is the result.

An emotional affair is harmful to a committed relationship more than a one night stand or casual sex.

Studies revealed that men are especially affected by proofs of their partner’s sexual infidelity, while women are more bothered by signs of emotional infidelity.

Many people believe that since there is no sexual involvement; emotional affair is not immoral. But based on the concept that an affair involves secrecy, deception and betrayal, it is outside the norm of morality.

In the midst of this kind of affair, the person continues denying that it is a harmful one but this is a ploy to overcome guilty feelings.

The relationship is an emotional affair when:

1. You keep your meetings and conversations secret from your partner.

2. You say and do things with someone which you have never say or done to your spouse.

3. You arrange to have private talks and spend time with the other person.

4. You share many time and confidences with the other person rather than with your partner.

Answer these questions honestly and determine if you are having an emotional affair:

1. Do you refrain telling your spouse how much time you spend or talk with the other person?

2. Do you confide to this person more about your day than to your spouse?

3. Do you also reveal to him your marital dissatisfaction?

4. Do you make yourself physically attractive for him?

5. Whether orally or in action, is there a sexual attraction between you?

6. Would you feel uneasy if your spouse saw you together?

If your answer is “yes” to two or more of these questions, get out of the situation. You are on your way to marital infidelity! Our culture makes it easy for any person to enter and stay involved in an emotional affair.

Men and women who are working together and traveling for business together will ultimately forge close relationships.

They keep in touch through their phones, mobile, text or instant message. Internet is often the culprit for it is the venue where most affairs commence.

People are given the opportunity to reconnect with friends from their past, as well as, develop good relationship new ones in many social networking sites.

To shield yourself from the temptation of starting such affair, you can follow these tips:

1. Do not be a flirt. Flirting leads to attractions and warm feelings you will start to crave.

2. Be cautious when you are at work and on the Internet. These are dangerous venues where emotional affairs typically begin.

3. Consider the state of your marriage. The more dissatisfied you are with your spouse the more likely you will start an affair.

4. Don’t go out without a companion with an old lover. If you have lost all the warm feelings for him, bring along your spouse.

5. Don’t build friendship with others who are unfaithful to their partners. You are likely influenced by their state of morality.

Once you have started to get involved in this kind of affair, it will cause you guilty feelings and remorse.

Many marriages crumble after undergoing such an affair. Rebuilding trust for you and your partner will take a lot of efforts and patience.

If you have an affair, you need to admit it and rectify your ways:

1. Make a complete break, no compromises by just staying as friends.

2. Be responsible to face the situation. Accept it and make a clean break.

3. Ask yourself why you allow it to happen? Is it the state of your marriage? Your desire to build self-esteem? Unconsciously repeating the actions of your cheating parent? Understand the underlying reasons why you get into this mess.

4. Betrayal was the fly in the ointment. Exert your best effort to develop trust.

Time is a healer but it takes a long time to rebuild a trust after an emotional affair. Patience is your friend. Do not expect your spouse to forgive and forget right away.

Allow time to heal the wound and things to get better again with your partner or spouse.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Why Men Cheat?

kajay — Wed, 22 Dec 2010 03:20:44 +0000

One of the most valued aspects in a relationship is fidelity.

The bride and her groom stand before the officiating authority and promise each other: “….for richer, for poorer, for better, for worse, in sadness and in joy, to cherish and continually bestow upon his/her heart’s deepest devotion, forsaking all others, keep yourself only unto him/her as long as we both shall live…”.

But sad to say, all these vows are gone with the wind when the man cheats. Why do men cheat?

In 1950, the famous Kinsey study revealed that 50% of the male Americans cheat on their marriage. Kat Hertlein, marriage & family therapist and.

Stated that approximately 40% of men look for sexual satisfaction outside their relationships

Why men cheat?

1. It is the biological nature of the male to be with as many females as possible.

“Men crave sexual “variety,” according to David Buss, professor of psychology at the University of Texas and author of The Evolution of Desire: Strategies of Human Mating (BasicBooks). Biologically, they are programmed to have sex with many women.

Whether it is the fault of evolution, biology or simple novelty, researchers concluded that men do seek different sex partners. However, the decision whether to cheat is entirely within his control.

2. There remains a double standard in society.

In the Middle East, only women are stoned to death for adultery. In most culture, expectations for fidelity are very high on women.

For men, having relationships with many women is a feather on their caps. Having mistresses seem a heroic accomplishment and successful men can play the field.

Most men believe that they could still love their mates even if they have sex with other women. This rationale allows guys to feel guilt-free.

3. “Ninety-nine percent of the time, there’s a simple reason why: boredom,” says Steve Santagati, author of The Manual: A True Bad Boy Explains How Men Think, Date and Mate – and What Women Can Do to Come Out on Top (Crown).

A guy, in his mid-life, feels empty. He desires to recapture his lost youth by being with a younger person who wants to enjoy life.

Adultery is an exciting game. Most of life is hard work and sometimes men want to live the excitement of life like the cinema.

A lot of unfaithful mates say that they would do it again because of the excitement involved. They just find themselves compelled to burst out of their day-to-day routine in search of something new.

4. Insecure men are most likely to cheat to ease their own insecurities.

There’s a tendency to cheat when there is emotional pressure like facing a pregnancy issue or losing your job.

They read or see the rich and famous men with beauty queens and socialites every time so they want to redeem themselves by following their footsteps.

Sometimes they feel insecure with their mates – and extramarital sex is cheaper and easier to get these days.

5. Our globalized and hi-tech world makes infidelity an easy game and gives ground why men cheat.

Most men believed that infidelity does not count when you are “on tour”.

Traveling is common these days and sexual services are offered all the time.

The PC and the mobile phones are easy venues to meet an exciting date.

Thanks to the Internet, it’s easier for men to cheat anytime, anywhere; while watching TV or on the laptop in bed next to their sleeping wives.

Cheating may not be physical and emotional but is defined as anything that breaches a relationship contract.

6. She is no longer the person I married. She has lost her physical attraction. She is overweight and doesn’t try to make herself pretty anymore.

Men want more sex than women so when his partner feels exhausted after looking after the house and kids all day, she is unwilling to accommodate him. He feels rejected and starts looking for willing chicks.

When their sexual value differs, sexually permissive men who don’t have equally adventurous partners are also more apt to wander.

7. Lack of communication is one of the most important reasons why men cheat.

The best way to remain faithful to each other is to maintain an open communication.

Both partners have to learn to trust each other, and they have to be open and honest about their feelings and desires.

If partners start keeping secrets or they don’t really trust each other, then that is fertile ground for infidelity to occur.

Why men cheat? The reasons are countless for one has to look back and analyze what has gone wrong. However, these reasons are more than enough for everyone who wants to make a successful relationship work.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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How to Catch Your Husband Cheating Online

kajay — Tue, 21 Dec 2010 14:21:05 +0000

Infidelity almost always causes permanent fallout between couples. But there is still hope that you can save the relationship in the nick of time if you know how to effectively confront your husband.

However, you must have solid proof before you go on the offensive. There are many different ways of catching your husband red-handed, but one of the easiest is by looking at his internet activities.

In this internet age, most people conduct personal and business transactions online. And there are different ways of accessing the internet, be it your cell phone, a laptop, a computer, at home or at work.

The good thing about this method of catching your spouse is that you don’t have to follow his car or spy on him in his office which can be risky.

You can simply log on to the same computer or cell phone he’s been using and check if there are questionable activities that can be found.

Now cheating may not always refer to physical intimacy between your spouse and the other woman. Sometimes it can be as simple as ‘harmless flirting’ and occasional dating to some secluded place in the city.

Or it can also be as impersonal as exchanging of Facebook messages. This is what constitutes emotional infidelity and may lead to something far more serious if your husband is not being careful.

Most couples share the same Facebook and email accounts and even have access to each other’s cell phones. But there are couples who value their privacy and draw a line in these things.

If you notice your husband being a little more apprehensive every time you look into his phone, that can be a sign of cheating.

Sometimes it can be as blatant as changing passwords and not allowing you to look into his messages in the name of ‘privacy’. If there’s a sudden change in his behavior regarding his internet accounts, then that can be grounds for suspicion.

Pay close attention to how he’s been acting lately.

-Does he spend an awful lot of time on the internet?
-Do you notice him changing browsers every time you barge into the room?
-Does he go online during specific times of the day?

These questions are not foolproof but they can be indicative of some sneak activities that your husband may be doing.

Many people know the basics of the internet but are not really what we can call “internet savvy”.

If your husband falls in this category, then he may not be aware of the fact that the history of the websites he visits may be stored in the computer settings.

You can visit these sites one by one and check if there are questionable sites such as dating and adult sites.

There are also gadgets that will allow you to access your husband’s activities online even if he deletes the history of websites visited.

You can also take a look at his myspace and Facebook accounts to see if he has recently found someone to flirt with.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Having an Affair with a Married Man

kajay — Tue, 21 Dec 2010 14:20:47 +0000

Women are known to be fierce lovers. They are extremely loyal to their partners and are generally monogamous. But there are those who stray and start having a forbidden relationship with other men.

The reasons for doing it vary. Some women do it because they become disillusioned with their marriage and are seeking warmth and love somewhere else.

Others commit adultery because they simply grow attracted to another man despite the unwavering faithfulness of their husbands.

The movie Unfaithful by Diane Lane is a perfect example of how a woman can go crazy in love with another man.

In this movie, she has a solid relationship with a guy played by Richard Gere and a seemingly perfectly life with a kid and an affluent home.

What went wrong?

You may ask. Well, she just sort of met this handsome, dashing Frenchman and they started a whirlwind relationship of romance and passion.

It was a tragic thing to see, and every more tragic if you think about how this stuff happens in real life.

If a woman is looking for something, it is not farfetched that she may bump into a married man and start going out with him. You see, married guys are said to have an advantage over single guys because they are generally older and they know the playing field, so to speak.

If your wife becomes drawn to the advances of a married co-worker, it is only a matter of time before they begin locking themselves in the conference room or booking a room in some secluded hotel downtown.

It can be difficult to catch her on the act especially if she is crafty and knows the ropes. So this calls for expertise if you want to find out the real score about your wife.

In most cases, you may notice some slight changes in her behavior. Women who cheat on their husbands lose fervor in sex and seem to be just going through the motions for the sake of not being caught.

She would become mechanical in bed, moaning on cue and sleeping right after sex without even engaging on small talk. Sometimes, she may very tired to even respond to your advances.

This behavior is a huge red flag that shouldn’t go unnoticed. This means she’s getting pleasure somewhere else, in the arms of another married guy.

Another sign is if there’s some drastic change in how she dresses and presents herself. Sure women love to dress their best on any occasion but cheaters are even more enthusiastic about it.

They would spend hours on taking a shower, putting on makeup, putting lotion, and selecting the right clothes for the day. And she would seem to be very eager to go to work every morning despite the fact that she’s ignored you all night.

There are several ways that you can catch your wife red-handed, but it is important to remind yourself not to lose control no matter what. Your temper can jeopardize your future and your children’s future if you aren’t careful.

As difficult as it may sound, be calm and patient during the whole infidelity episode, you may just win her back or divorce her for good and find someone else who will love you back unconditionally.

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How to Tell if Your Husband is Cheating

kajay — Tue, 21 Dec 2010 14:20:36 +0000

The signs of infidelity can sometimes be tricky. There are certain clues that would point to the possibility of your husband going behind your back.

But it may not be very clear. You would need to be a little more observant than usual and use your instincts in finding out the truth.

It is important that you keep an open mind about all this. Your husband may be exhibiting these telltale signs but are not cheating in actuality.

On the other hand, he may be as sly as a fox, not giving as much clues about what’s going on when he is not around.

Nevertheless, it wouldn’t hurt to be a little more suspicious. Just make sure that your suspicions do not get in the way of maintaining a healthy relationship with him.

Remember that your spouse is innocent until proven guilty.

So unless you have a concrete proof of some sneaky activities behind your back, don’t let the fire in the relationship grow cold.

One of the signs of infidelity is boredom. Your spouse would seem disinterested with you, your kids, his overall home life, and even his job. If he tries to make it up to you, it would feel forced and unnatural.

Mostly, he is trying to cover up his guilt about the whole affair.

Some men also have difficulty keeping up stamina in bed. It is because of this healthy sex affair he’s been having with the other woman that he loses interest in making love to you.

Another sign to look out for is if he seems to be always in a hurry to get to work. And he is always making excuses that he couldn’t get home early because he has to render overtime or meet clients or hang out with his co-workers.

If this became a pattern over the long haul, then it could definitely be indicative of his cheating.

Your finances can also take a hit if he has some extra-curricular activities that you are not aware of.

If you have been subsisting on middle class salary, it is all the more obvious if he’s bringing less and less money home every month.

Infidelity can be expensive, what with all the expensive dinners and hotel bookings and lavish gifts.

Your husband may also be suddenly dressing and looking nicer than usual.

Although there are men who are vain and are particular with how they look in public, you can tell that your husband is cheating if there’s a sudden shift in behavior in terms of appearance and overall deportment.

Check his closet if he’s been buying a lot of colognes and perfumes and expensive suits lately. A cheater acts like he’s going through puberty again trying to make a positive impression on the opposite sex.

If you feel your partner shortchanging you in bed or trying to avoid certain topics, you must start letting your guards up and investigating the truth about his ‘other life’. As an old saying once said, the truth will set you free.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Is My Wife Having an Affair?

kajay — Tue, 21 Dec 2010 14:20:05 +0000

Women who cheat on their husbands are far and few between. The female specie is known to be extremely loving and loyal to their partners.

But there are those who slip through the cracks and end up being completely addicted to another man, unable to get out and control her actions.

It is really a sad thing to happen in relationships especially if there were children involved. But this shouldn’t deter you from finding out the truth because the truth will set you free.

There are different kinds of cheaters.

There are cheaters who do it because of lack of passion in their marriage. And there are those who commit adultery because they couldn’t help themselves from falling head over heels in love with another person.

Whatever the case, cheating is never acceptable and should be exposed in the open for the good of everyone involved.

There are telltale signs that could help you get to the bottom of your hunch. One, she would start accusing you to cover up her own guilt.

This counter-attack is a subtle way of diverting your suspicions and making you think you were the one making an offense.

You shouldn’t allow this tactic to distract you.

If she begins accusing you of the very same thing you are worried about, it could mean that she is projecting her own guilt to you.

Don’t fall for it. Be firm and tell her that you are clean and that she is the one might be doing questionable things.

If she seems preoccupied most of the time and can’t even be bothered to cuddle with you, then this is definitely a ground for suspicion.

Women crave emotional and physical intimacy with their partners and it would be weird if she starts avoiding these things.

Sometimes she is more cunning, hiding her affair by being more attentive to you and more accommodating. Either way, it would seem unnatural at best. You will be able to see through the ruse if you truly know her.

A more obvious sign is if she spends more time at ‘work’. Occasional overtime is normal, but it shouldn’t take over her life.

Going home late and leaving home earlier than usual could mean something. For all you know, she might be holed up in some dark room somewhere with a mystery guy she’s trying hard to hide from you.

-Do you notice her becoming sexier and drop-dead gorgeous lately?
-Has she been buying expensive wardrobes and wearing them more frequently?

If this is a rather unusual behavior that she only started exhibiting lately, you must be on the lookout for her.

This is common to wives who want to please their husbands, but cheaters do it to please others and create a good impression on their secret affair while acting distant and agitated with their legal partners.

If you have been thinking of hiring a professional detective to do the dirty work for you, then do it. It is worth the money considering that the relationship is on the line here.

If she comes clean about the affair, make sure that you remained calm and composed to avoid unnecessary harm that may arise from too much anger.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Signs of an Affair

kajay — Tue, 21 Dec 2010 14:19:44 +0000

Are you having this feeling of uneasiness about your spouse, like you almost have a hunch that he or she is cheating on you?

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

-Has the relationship grown cold and your partner is becoming more and more aloof and disinterested every day?

-Do you notice your spouse becoming jumpy every time you enter the room like he or she is hiding something?

These are signs of infidelity and should be taken seriously if you want to know the truth about a possible ‘affair’ that’s been going on behind your back.

Although people often discredit it, your intuition speaks volumes. After all, the human instinct is made to detect signals that something is not right.

The smart way to do is to listen to it and not ignore it. But you must also be wary of jumping into conclusions without solid evidence because it can further jeopardize the situation.

In many cases, couples break up not because of infidelity but because the man or the woman is breathing behind his or her spouse’s back.

If your intuition tells you that something sneaky is going on, you must first try to be as calm as possible. Promise yourself that you wouldn’t lose it should you be able to prove that your spouse is indeed having an affair.

Then begin the investigation. In this modern age, you now have all sorts of options when it comes to busting your partner’s hidden affair.

One of the signs is if you are unable to reach your wife or husband’s mobile phone for the most part of the day. If this has been going on for quite some time now, it calls for an investigation.

Unless his or her work environment restricts the use of cell phone during office hours, there is no reason why you shouldn’t be able to connect to him or her any day.

Unfaithful partners often turn off their phones while doing the nasty with the other party. They would just send text messages or even route your call to the voicemail saying that he or she is busy.

Another sign of an affair is if your partner has been putting more effort in his or her hygiene and the way he or she dresses. It is but normal for people to dress nicely and look good in and out of the house.

But if there was a sudden change in this behavior, then you better start being alert and watchful of your partner’s actions.

Also, your partner shouldn’t be extra careful around his computer or Blackberry. In fact, it is common for married couples to share passwords on their Facebook accounts and allow occasional checking of cell phones.

If you notice your partner becoming sneakier about his mobile phone, you should expect the worst.

Most unfaithful spouses become increasingly agitated and defensive as they sink deeper into this whole infidelity mess.

Pay close attention to his or her reaction when you ask questions about his or her whereabouts. Oftentimes, nervousness and elusiveness are the clearest signs of guilt.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Frequent Business Trips- Is Your Partner Cheating?

kajay — Fri, 17 Dec 2010 20:05:28 +0000

Where does my insecurity end . . . and her infidelity begin?

“She used to love it when I drove her to the airport, but lately she seems perfectly happy and excited to head out of town on her own, renting a cab and hauling all her own luggage.

Why would her beautiful eyes have that happy sparkle in them when she’s leaving without me?”

“Usually my husband and I took advantage of his company’s out of town assignments to share some travel time together.

What could be sweeter or more thrilling than sleeping in a strange hotel room together and renewing the spark?

But the last two trips he seemed distracted and gave excuses as to why I couldn’t go this time . . . and even though they made intellectual sense, my intuition just KNEW there was a lot he wasn’t telling me.”

Does any of this feel familiar to you?

It can leave us feeling very insecure and hurt when we sense our loved one is rejecting us, especially when the possibility of another man or woman enters the equation.

But how can we find out, once and for all, if he or she really is cheating, or if it’s all perfectly innocent – and, do we even really want to know the truth?

Some signs of a cheating spouse

• Evasiveness when you question him about his plans
• Business/travel receipts that don’t add up
• Change in her usual behavior – more sex/no sex, reluctance to talk/ talking too much, etc.
• Protective of luggage/briefcase/cell phone etc. – Doesn’t want you looking through them
• Travelling more frequently/delays returning
• Nervous/defensive or eager body language as trip time approaches

Add these to the general signs of cheating such as; emotional distance, withdrawal of physical affection, suspicious phone activity, suspicious credit card charges, secrecy, picking fights, unexplained new interest in appearance or new hobbies — the list goes on and on but you get the idea.

The sad fact is that you can check off all the lists and take all the quizzes, but what it really comes down to is this; if one partner suspects the other of infidelity, they’re usually right.

Does that mean the end of your relationship?

Not necessarily.

You’re hurting deeply right now, emotions are high and you feel that fight-or-flight-response, but don’t start acting/reacting just for the sake of motion.

Some marriages manage to recover from affairs. It all depends on what both parties end up wanting, so it’s worth thinking beyond your knee-jerk reaction.

There are all sorts of options available to you if you decide to pursue them to try to catch your cheating spouse, including hiring a private investigator.

Before you jump into anything like that though – even before trying to ‘set her up’ to catch her yourself – take a little time to seriously consider your options in EVERY eventuality.

That is, IF she’s innocent, IF he’s guilty, and if so, what do you really want to do about it?

Most self-help columns and even many of your friends would encourage you to find out, take action, confront, gather evidence for a divorce, leave him, sue her . . . in other words, ‘fix’ or end the relationship.

Know, however, that there are untold millions of people who decide — either actively or passively – to endure a cheating spouse because it’s more important to them to keep the man or woman they love, maintain the lifestyle, protect the children or even keep up appearances.

While there are certainly circumstances to the contrary (such as abuse or other danger), who’s to say that staying in your relationship is the wrong choice?

You won’t usually read this, but many people have ended up worse-off for the rest of their lives after a divorce than if they’d stayed.

Even if just for financial reasons, (which often means simple survival), it might be foolish to throw your marriage away over an affair.

What you end up deciding to do is your decision and yours alone. Just try to keep a level head and take each step carefully, preferably with the help of a trusted therapist or counselor.

Whichever way you end up going, seeking reconciliation or separation, don’t go it alone.

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Why People Cheat In Relationships?

kajay — Fri, 17 Dec 2010 20:04:17 +0000

You might have caught your partner red-handed, or perhaps you merely suspect it.

Even if not, it makes sense, with the proliferation of cyber-sex and affairs among both men and women, that it will cross your mind to wonder what drives a spouse to cheat in the first place?

Maybe nothing. That is, nothing that you’ve done wrong. Sometimes things really do ‘just happen’.

We are all, in the end, biological creatures with physical needs and weaknesses.

In the midst of the heat of an unexpectedly delicious moment at the office party with that guy you’ve had a little crush on, or that reassuring hug you gave to the sexy neighbor when her cat got run over, things felt just a little too good.

Like the first bite of a succulent steak, you can’t help craving it, if even just for a moment. Unfortunately sometimes that means you go where you shouldn’t and before you know it, you’ve crossed the line.

If it’s really that innocent, your relationship can probably survive using disclosure, apology and conscious intent.

BUT

But what if the indiscretion is ongoing? What if your spouse can’t or won’t stop seeing the ‘other’, or even seems to ‘get off’ ongoing behind your back?

That’s the problem.

People often cheat because it just plain feels good.

However, a solid friendship, trusting relationship and the security and partnership of marriage feels good, too, so why do so many people risk all that for a roll in the hay or a fling?

Here are some reasons why people cheat on their partners:

• You fight too often
• Your sexual compatibility has eroded and your mate isn’t satisfied
• Gradual erosion of trust
• Over-familiarity (boredom)
• Experimentation (Maybe she doesn’t think you’d approve of the fantasy she’s dying to live out in bed – so she tries it with someone who she feels won’t judge her)
• You’ve been too busy for intimacy
• Your mate is no longer attracted to you that way (have you let yourself go? Be honest. You have limits too when it comes to physical appearance, hygiene, etc)
• Has petty bickering and nagging drained all the joy, humor and affection from our relationship?
• There is a grudge there that needs to be addressed
• She feels taken for granted
• He feels unappreciated
• There’s a basic incompatibility in your relationship
• She feels like she’s getting old and less pretty and wants to feel young and desirable again
• He feels older and less manly and wants to feel that testosterone rush again to make him feel good about himself
• He’s just a chronic adulterer
• She doesn’t have the relationship skills to maintain or work through a long-term relationship
• He has deep sexual kinks (bi curious, S&M etc) that he feels are inappropriate to live out with his wife
• She needs to feel the power and flush of strong romantic love again. She needs that reassurance and sense of being cherished and adored.

Can your marriage recover from an affair? Yes, it’s possible, even if your spouse has feelings for the object of her obsession.

But be aware that it won’t be simple or quick. Both of you will have to work hard and probably involve a therapist to help guide you.

But it is possible.

Can You Trust Your Gut Feeling That Your Partner Is Cheating?

kajay — Fri, 17 Dec 2010 20:01:23 +0000

It’s far too easy for most of us to dismiss our internal radar warning system, and make excuses, over-rationalize or ignore evidence that our subconscious is screaming out for us to pay attention to.

You may have no concrete proof, but somehow you just ‘know’ that there’s something going on between your wife and that new salesman at the office.

“He denies it, but he sure seems to be making an awful lot of little shopping trips at odd hours, or his short errands end up stretching into hours.

How many times can his car give him trouble without him getting it fixed once and for all?”

“It seems like our friends or co-workers are acting funny when I visit her at the office, but I just can’t put my finger on what’s wrong.”

Should I be worried?

Actually, yes. Statistics from private investigators show that about 80% of women and about 40% of men are right when their ‘gut’ tells them that their partner is having an affair.

Those are pretty sobering statistics, and underscore the need to really ‘tune in’ to our innermost guidance system when it comes to red flags.

Most unfaithful spouses actually give off a bounty of unconscious clues about the state of their involvement with their marriage — or with someone else. They can’t help it.

Our bodies are automatic lie-detectors as well as lie-projectors.

Physiologically, a liar’s eyes give him away by inappropriate dilation response; her skin flushes or grows hot or cold; hands tremble or the mouth dries out.

There may be many more signals we don’t know about yet – but our intuition does.

Your intuition can pick up evasive words, looks, body posture and voice quality. It can spot nervousness or deception a mile away.

The big problem is, unlike our animal friends, we tend to talk ourselves out of listening to these innate warning signals.

We make excuses, rationalize, justify behavior, and take inappropriate blame or guilt upon ourselves in order to exonerate the one we love.

And we can do this subconsciously, in the blink of an eye, almost as fast as the warning comes in we manage to dilute, refute or edit it so it’s less threatening to our sensibilities.

You can look at all the obvious red flags:

• Increased emotional distance
• Evasiveness
• Secrecy
• Strange phone behavior
• Odd credit card charges
• Picking fights
• More Sex
• Less Sex
• New interest in personal appearance
• ETC

You can even see all these signs and still find ways to tell yourself everything is fine and you’re just being paranoid. In fact, on some level you are desperate searching for anything you can find to prove there’s nothing going on and it’s all you.

If you’re a naturally suspicious person, or insecure in general, there could be something to this.

Check with a trusted friend of therapist. You could have childhood issues with trust that are coloring events in your adult life.

But after you’ve spent some time evaluating your own self, it’s time to check in with your gut and truly give it a listen. It’s smarter than you think it is.

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Picking Fights For No Reason- Is Your Partner Cheating?

kajay — Fri, 17 Dec 2010 19:58:16 +0000

Whether you usually get along as cozily as two peas in a pod, or tend to fight things out as a matter of course, if your spouse suddenly seems to be picking fights or is hyper-easily offended, perhaps she’s hiding something.

Let’s face it: most couples squabble from time to time. But lately it seems she’s just looking for things to be unhappy about.

Maybe he’s starting to criticize your cooking more, or she’s nit-picking chores you’ve done around the home. You feel like suddenly you just can’t do anything right.

Maybe she’s even giving your sagging midsection an appraising (and disapproving) look, or he’s making snide comments about how you dress or how you wear your hair.

It’s not that they seem concerned about your health or want to help you make the best impression before a job interview; they seem to just plain no longer LIKE you.

Be alert for these other ‘red flags’ of a cheating spouse:

• Strange calls/hang ups
• More/less sexual or emotional intimacy
• More privacy demanded around phone use, briefcases or purses
• Unexplained charges on the credit cards
• Sudden preoccupation with personal appearance, hygiene or grooming
• Evasiveness or defensiveness
• ETC

You get the idea.

Perhaps your intuition is already telling you what you don’t want to hear; your lover may be having an affair.

Why would infidelity lead your partner to be super-critical or edgy?

• Guilt.
• Misdirection (diversion)
• Power
• A growing dissatisfaction with your relationship
• And, frankly, the sexual thrill of cruelty

The most likely scenario is that your wayward spouse is simply reacting from deep guilt, and trying in her own way to put the blame on you, making YOU the ‘bad guy’ to justify her behavior.

One thing you won’t usually read is that sometimes, depending on your history as a couple and the cheater’s personality, the sheer sexual thrill of hurting the one you’re stepping out on can be a real rush.

So as dark as is may be, the fact that he or she can ‘kick you when you’re down’ may dramatically raise his level of sexual enjoyment, enable and escalate the affair, and bring out his or her latent tendencies for cruelty.

Worse is when your cheating partner then runs off to his mistress or, having found an excuse to drive off in a huff, she storms out to visit her lover, and they have especially hot sex afterwards.

That can become a sexual addiction even beyond the emotional component of the affair itself.

This is a very tricky slope to navigate.

What can you do to?

While, what you probably want are the right ‘magic words’ and advice to either make everything better or address the situation yourself, your smartest (and kindest) move might be to turn first to your professional counselor or therapist to help you sort through your suspicions, feelings and next steps.

They’ll help you look at things from different angles and perhaps more objectively (after all, it IS possible your spouse is innocent of any wrongdoing), and plot your course of action.

Most of all, take care of yourself and don’t beat yourself up with feelings of inadequacy or self-blame. Be kind to yourself and work on a healing solution with the help of your church or therapist.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Sudden Need Of Privacy- Is Your Partner Cheating?

kajay — Fri, 17 Dec 2010 18:30:29 +0000

You and your spouse used to stay up all night in bed, just talking.

Everything was relaxed. You shared all your possessions, she would ask you to get things from her purse; you’d go through his briefcase to help him to find his day planner.

You spent every minute together you could. There was total trust, openness and sharing. You felt so connected.

So why does she jump now if you walk into the room while she’s on the phone?

Why does he stay up long after you’ve gone to sleep, working on the computer?

Your first worried thought is, unfortunately, probably the right one.

Your loved one is pulling away. There’s now a distance there, a gulf where the intimacy used to be, and you feel like you’re intruding in things that before, you used to share. He just seems to need so much privacy now.

The other sickening part of it is that you didn’t have a fight, and there’s nothing to explain her sudden cold shoulder – or that worrisome, distracted glow in her eyes. Nothing, that is, except the possibility you don’t want to face.

Is your lover seeing someone else?

The biggest Red Flag is change

Here is a quick and partial list of some of the privacy issues that could become symptoms of an affair. Remember, you’re looking for change from past behavior:

• He gets angry or uncomfortable if you answer his phone
• He doesn’t want you getting anything from his wallet anymore
• She gets nervous or jumpy if you start going through her purse
• She shuts down her computer screen if you walk up behind her
• She password protects her email or computer
• He gets his own cell phone account
• He deletes his email or chat trail, or she clears her cell phone history
• Phone calls are taken out of the room and conversations kept low
• Suddenly hangs up if you walk in
• He has friends he has to see alone and activities that exclude you
• She suddenly needs to visit her mother/sister/friend a lot, without you
• She doesn’t want you driving her places any more

The main red flag, however, is probably your intuition.

While there are some people who really are insecure, controlling or paranoid, for the most part, if you suddenly feel like something’s wrong between you, if your internal radar is sending out alarms that make your stomach feel heavy or your heart to feel wounded, chances are that your ever-vigilant self-preservation instinct is kicking in.

Our ‘gut’ will tell us what our brain doesn’t want to hear — even when our gut is screaming to get our attention. And that’s understandable.

The same way many people will ignore signs of cancer until it’s just too obvious to dismiss, we’ll sometimes do anything (lie to ourselves, make flimsy excuses to justify our spouses’ behavior, blame ourselves, even isolate ourselves from concerned friends and family) to preserve our precious fantasy that all is well.

Why? Because that fantasy is our life-blood.

If you have to, hire a private detective or educate yourself about how to track down, trap or document a suspect cheating spouse.

If you talk to your friends or family they may push you to leave him, divorce her, stay for the sake of the children or any number of interfering controlling advice; listen with only half your mind.

Their advice may be good, but maybe not good for you. They aren’t living your life. They don’t know the right path for you.

A trained therapist or counselor, on the other hand, generally, won’t ‘tell you what to do’. They will, however, help you sort through your feelings and options and work out, step by step, moment by moment, your next moves.

And this is important, because NO MATTER what you decide, it’s your relationship and your life, and no one but you has the right to make those big decisions.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Guilt- A Sign Of A Cheating Partner

kajay — Fri, 17 Dec 2010 18:26:36 +0000

Usually, you’d never argue with flowers, gifts or special dinners out. Those special home-made meals should make you feel loved and appreciated.

So why are they suddenly ‘ringing wrong’ and making you uncomfortable? Could they be signs that your partner is feeling guilty about something?

Guilt can be a tough burden to live with. If we still care about our husband or wife, but we find ourselves drawn into a tryst or ongoing affair, anyway, we’re in conflict.

Regardless of whether we find ourselves ending or continuing the affair, we don’t want to lose our primary relationship and the life we’ve built around it.

More, we know we’re wrong. We’ve betrayed our loved one on the deepest level. So how do we feel?

Guilty.

Luckily for the innocent victim, these signs of guilt come out in all sorts of visible, palpable ways.

If you know what to look for, you can not only spot these guilty giveaways, you can interpret them correctly instead of fooling or blaming yourself:

• Your man suddenly starts bringing you flowers for no reason
• Your wife offers back rubs or becomes sexually demonstrative (when usually she wouldn’t)
• He starts surprising you with dinners out
• She decides to start cooking you your favorite special meals – and it’s not your birthday
• He uncharacteristically surprises you with a gift or jewelry and there are no Holidays coming up
• More affectionate, but it feels contrived, over-done or desperate

Or it could go the other way, with negative guilty behaviors:

• Suddenly starts picking fights
• Defensiveness
• Secrecy
• Nervousness/agitation/depression
• Emotional distance
• Physical distance
• Accuses you of lying
• Questions YOUR whereabouts
• Begins finding fault with you; your manner, your appearance, your housekeeping, your sense of humor, anything — as long as fault can be found

While it is possible that something other than infidelity could be causing these symptoms of guilt (losing a job, perhaps, or losing money because of a poor investment choice), those other concerns tend to be brought out into the open eventually when your partner has worked through her feelings or resolved the situation enough to be able to talk to you about it.

This is understandable. Especially for men, who are geared towards being productive, (taking pride in and taking their sense of self-worth from their careers), not meeting family financial obligations can cause feelings of despair, nervousness and – yes – guilt.

Also, even if they never confess to such a perceived failure, it’s probable that once your spouse has found a way to correct or make up for it (making a better investment, working extra hours until the shortfall is made up or getting that new job) things will go back to where they were before the problem.

The secret that never gets told, though, the increasing level of alienation and estrangement, are signs that something different may be going on.

Another difference is that, in a cheating situation, your spouse is likely to grow more secretive, more argumentative, more aloof, distant or abusive over time.

What should you do if your partner seems to be exhibiting the guilty signs of infidelity?

Or — What if YOU’RE the one stepping out on your partner and finding yourself wracked with guilt, yet unable to break off the affair?

In either case, short of you two talking about it openly and calmly (possible but improbable) the best course of action might be to find a good professional therapist or counselor to help you sort things out.

Guilt associated with infidelity runs deep and can do serious damage to all involved. Don’t try to go it alone.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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I love you but I am not in love with you- Is Your Partner Cheating?

kajay — Fri, 17 Dec 2010 18:25:36 +0000

Is it possible to still love the one you’re about to leave or the mate you’re cheating on?

Of course. But that doesn’t mean it’s the kind of love that makes him want to stay committed to your relationship.

While being loved is almost always a good thing, when it comes to your primary love relationship (marriage), the KIND of love is what sets it apart from a dear friendship or sense of family loyalty.

No matter what all the other self-help and relationship ‘experts’ might tell you, if either of you find that something is missing from your marriage, if that special elusive chemistry, excitement, sexuality and mutual dependence has eroded or vanished, someone will be looking for a way to get it back into their lives – but not necessarily with you.

And no amount of whining, guilt or blame can bring it back.

And no matter if the ‘experts’ tell you to marry your ‘best friend’, you’d better make sure you want to jump that best friends’ bones every chance you get, because –

You can love as many people as you want to.
You can have as any friends as you want.
You can only have one legal spouse.

Should you try to save your marriage?

Of course. If you want to. It could be that the estrangement isn’t a permanent state. Maybe you’ve had a few quarrels lately, or one (or both) of you got too mired down by life’s endless demands that your romantic life has been shelved.

Maybe that romantic fantasy that’s happening with the new guy at work feels great because you are so glad to have FEELINGS again, and it’s turning your head.

That doesn’t mean it will last, though. There is something to be said for the comfort, continuity and history of a long-term relationship. The ‘in love’ could come back, with work or luck.

So just because your spouse feels they’re no longer ‘in love’ with you doesn’t necessarily mean it’s all over. Seek help from a good marriage counselor and see if perhaps the spark can be reignited, before giving up and seeing your attorney.

What if, however, you’ve been DATING, and you’ve fallen head-over-heels in love, but now he tells you that, while he does love you, he isn’t IN love with you?

That’s a very clear message that, although she might want to continue the relationship (she probably did, at least until you asked her for reassurance), she doesn’t feel that special ‘thing’ that makes her yearn to join every aspect of her heart, body, life, soul, and bank account with you.

Would that mean that she might be cheating on you? Probably, because in her mind you’re not truly a ‘couple’ –

Unfortunately, this is the stage during which ‘Fatal Attraction’ type relationships can develop. If one party just can’t accept that the object of their love has a different take on things, obsession can take over.

The most important thing here, before you let things go too far in your fantasies, is to know that nothing you can do can MAKE someone love you that way.

In this case you can decide to RESPECT your friend. If you do, and if you value and want to keep that friendship in your life, decide to really embrace that idea in your heart.

Your expectations from her and your relationship will be different now, and, who knows, you might even find you enjoy helping each other find dates or discuss you respective relationship dilemmas.

It IS possible, and in many cases, if you are focused on sincerely being a good FRIEND while also moving ahead with your own life, you may find that the object of your former crush really WASN’T the right one for you, and you’re glad you kept him as a dear friend before you eventually drifted painlessly into new relationships, and new lives.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Are Your Mutual Friends Acting Strangely? Perhaps Your Partner Is Cheating

kajay — Fri, 17 Dec 2010 18:23:32 +0000

It makes you feel terribly uncomfortable. You go to your husband’s office to surprise him for lunch. When you walk in, everyone gets strangely quiet, they act unnatural or they watch you like you’re about to step on a land mine.

What’s going on?

Maybe nothing. Perhaps the boss just had a temper tantrum or they lost a big account, or the business next door got robbed last night.

But you can’t shake the feeling that they’re hiding something. You almost feel like you’re intruding.

It’s possible but unlikely that asking will give you any answers, but it will probably make the situation even more awkward.

So now that you’re worried and your radar is on high alert, how can you start to piece together some idea of whether or not your beloved is doing the unthinkable – having an affair?

It helps to look at the whole picture.

• How is your home life? Have there been any changes? (Be honest.) Usually we know intuitively that something’s not right, well before any actual infidelity takes place.
• Has she been more secretive?
• More protective of his suitcase, brief case, cell phone
• Has she gotten protective of her purse, email, phone calls?
• Has there been an increase or decrease in your sex life?
• Has the kind of sex you’ve had changed significantly with no explanation?
• How about mutual activities? Are you shut out of her meetings with friends now, when you didn’t used to be? Is she guarded when you ask her about that trip to visit her sister?
• Does he get defensive about going out so often to check on his Mom?
• Does she quickly leave the room when some cell phone calls come in, or spend a long time out walking or in the bathroom?
• Does he hang up, startled, when you accidentally walk in on him when he’s on the phone?
• Does she close the email window or laptop when you walk up behind her?

All these little signs, plus many more (you get the picture) can be red flags of infidelity. They can also be innocent actions. Much depends on how many there are, how frequent, and even how sensitive you might happen to be about rejection.

Are you a distrustful person? Ask a close friend or therapist if you’re not sure.

Odds are, though, that if it looks like a horse, if it acts like a horse, sounds like one and smells like one, then there’s a horse in your living room. If that’s the case, the next question is what to do about it?

The best advice is to seek the help and guidance of a good therapist of marriage counselor. If you can get your mate to go, as well, so much the better.

If there’s any hope of repairing the trust and security of your marriage, it will take the two of you, and you both have to want it enough to work at it.

While a marriage can stay intact from the efforts of one person alone (that is, legally staying married and living under the same roof) the intimacy, trust, friendship and love may be lost entirely without both parties willing to work at it.

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Why Cheating Partners Often Accuse You When You Suspect Them Of Cheating?

kajay — Fri, 17 Dec 2010 18:22:32 +0000

You’ve noticed some suspicious changes in your partner’s demeanor.

More distance, less sex, more secrecy. But then she turned the tables on you and started insinuating that YOU were lying about your trip to see your Mother.

What’s going on?

There is a term in psychology called ‘projection’.

Here is a scientific (psychological) definition of what’s going on, from SAGE Journals Online Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin:

“Projection as an Interpersonal Influence Tactic: The Effects of the Pot Calling the Kettle Black

Derek D. Rucker- Ohio State University, rucker.46[at]osu.edu

Anthony R. Pratkanis- University of California, Santa Cruz, peitho[@]cats.ucsc.edu

Abstract

In his analysis of Nazi propaganda, Ellis Freeman identified an influence tactic based on projection: accusing another person of the negative traits and behaviors that one possesses and exhibits with the goal of deflecting blame away from one’s own misdeeds and toward the accused.

Although the use of projection as an influence tactic is not limited to fascist regimes and its consequences can be socially devastating, the projection tactic has not been subjected to experimental analysis.

In four experiments, the authors found that projection was effective in (a) increasing the blame placed on the target of the projection and (b) decreasing the culpability of the accuser (or projectionist).

These effects occurred despite (a) raising suspicions about the motives of the projectionist, (b) providing evidence that the projectionist is guilty of the deed, and (c) timing the projection so that it occurred after the misdeeds came to light.

OK, then, in plain language, he’s accusing you of what he’s doing, to get the attention off himself, to confuse the issue and make you unsure, and because his own misdeed or guilt is leaking out all over the place.

It’s guilt and manipulation, plain and simple – and pretty much a dead giveaway that your beloved wife or husband is not just cheating, but now trying to shift you from being the victim to being the enemy.

If your partner can fabricate a way to become the victim, or to find fuel for aggressive or defensive behavior (rather than hidden, secretive or cautious actions), he or she actually feels more empowered.

He might even become very indignant or she might feign being deeply hurt or insulted and accuse you of betraying her – then might even solicit YOUR sympathy or help!

Even if you haven’t verbalized your suspicions to her, she may begin picking fights to give herself an excuse to storm out, get into an argument, hurt you or play the victim herself, thereby disarming you and making YOU feel bad that you’ve hurt her and then to feel protective of her.

If you needed convincing evidence that your spouse is up to no good, this behavior is it. It’s very, very hard to mistake or misread such tactics as anything but guilt – yet, surprisingly, they often end up working for the cheater!

Most of us, if we’re truly blameless, are more than willing (too willing) to take on guilt for inadvertently hurting someone else’s feelings, or jumping to the wrong conclusion.

We can’t even conceive of such convoluted logic, and so find ourselves defenseless when confronted with it. Often we’ll even twist and knot ourselves into anguished self-questioning and self-doubt to shoe-horn ourselves into the role of ‘bad guy;’.

Luckily, simply KNOWING that this kind of manipulation could be taking place is your best defense.

Your next step? First, seek out a caring therapist or counselor. Then, with that objective and supportive help, move forward with whatever decisions you make. The important thing is to be kind to yourself.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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“We are just friends”- Is Your Partner Cheating?

kajay — Fri, 17 Dec 2010 18:20:04 +0000

You feel like you’ve been kicked in the gut, but you’re not sure why.

You finally had the courage to ask her about all the time she’s been spending with her ‘special friend’ from work but she looked at you like you were crazy (or paranoid) and laughed it off, saying they are ‘just friends’.

Either that, or he got irritated and defensive, and you ended up feeling like a total nag to even dare question him.

But, if he’s telling the truth and there’s nothing romantic going on, why do you feel like you’re being betrayed/ abandoned? Why that growing emotional gulf between you?

Is there such a thing as a truly platonic friendship?

Yes there is.

But any friendship between opposite sexes has the potential to bloom into a romance. It’s simply Nature.

So how can you tell if your mate’s ‘special friend’ is a threat to your marriage? For one thing, it will be written all over his face.

Is he dreamy, distracted, easily startled, nervous or defensive? Does she talk to her special friend in private, leaving the room with her cell phone, or quickly hang up if you ‘catch’ her?

Do they include you in their outings or conversations, or if they do, do you feel like you’re crashing a private party where you don’t ‘get’ any of the inside jokes?

Has the closeness and emotional/sexual intimacy between you and your loved one changed? Things like:

• Less sex/more sex
• Less conversation/more forced conversation
• Fewer spontaneous gestures of affection or none at all – or obviously over-done attentiveness
• Forgetting special occasions — or buying flowers or making special meals for no reason, when she never did before

Are there other ominous signs of estrangement?

• Mysterious credit card charges
• Strange phone calls/hang-ups
• Sudden new interests, hobbies or preferences that seem to have nothing to do with your lives together
• Odd hours/longer-than-needed or more frequent shopping trips
• Shopping trips to get the ‘special friend’ a special gift
• Longer or more erratic office hours
• More out of town trips
• More independence
• More guardedness and protectiveness of personal belongings (like briefcases, purses, cell phones)
• Change in computer or phone habits (clearing call and email history etc)
• Setting up new accounts without your name on them
• Your spouse seriously downplays the attractiveness of the friend – if you ever actually get to meet them, they’re gorgeous

Basically, then, if the ‘special friendship’ ends up making you feel: excluded, hurt, left out/shut out, lied to, deceived, betrayed, less important, less desirable, alientated or threatened, then your intuition is probably picking up on things that you need to pay closer attention to.

But — Is it possible you’re just paranoid? Sure. You have to be very honest with yourself.

You might also do well to ask a close friend or therapist to determine if you actually do have a personality that’s prone to distrust or is hyper-sensitive to rejection.

If your partner really ISN’T cheating on you, you certainly don’t want to start a problem in your marriage.

In the end, though, in most cases, intuition is pretty darned smart; much smarter, in fact than our brains.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Infidelity And Genes- What’s The Relationship Between The Two?

kajay — Thu, 16 Dec 2010 15:25:05 +0000

Rising Cases of Infidelity

Given the nature of infidelity, absolute statistics on infidelity cannot be established. But below are some manifestations why we can say that indeed, there is a growing number of cheating individuals who are in relationships:

• Annulment and divorce issues are often read or talked about in newspapers, in entertainment shows and even in the workplace
• Adults often engage in multiple partners before getting married
• Office romances are becoming common as spouses spend more time with co-workers than with their partners
• DNA tests or paternal tests are conducted just to prove that one is the child’s father
• Many spend time in the internet chatting and exchanging electronic mails with their ‘online partners’
• Reported cases of homicide charged against husbands or wives who caught their partners cheating

But why do people cheat? Spouses and partners cheat on their relationships for a variety of reasons. For some, they are even surprised why they cheated their husbands or wives. Infidelity is often not a rational decision but people allow it to happen to themselves and to their relationships.

Some Causes of Infidelity

a. Superiority

When a wife thinks she is more financially-stable or a husband thinks he is too handsome for his plain-looking partner, the tendency is to look for excitement or more fun outside the relationship. The feeling is that they deserve someone more of their equal and this justifies their cheating.

b. Boredom

When a partner feels that things are becoming a routine and are becoming predictable, the tendency is to find an external stimulation that can give them new experiences. Sometimes, the partner just wants an adrenaline rush and takes the challenge that he or she will not be caught.

c. Jealousy

A new baby or a new job often takes the time of the spouse so to ease the negative feeling of getting less attention. He or she gets attention from an outside source.

d. Insecurity

Some people suffer from their own insecurities. To address this, they constantly have to prove to themselves that the opposite sex still finds them interesting.

Genetics as Source of Infidelity

More than the reasons stated above, studies show that genetics may be partly to be blamed for infidelity. Scientists have released studies that the dopamine receptor D4 gene and the presence of allele 334 gene play significant roles why people cheat.

The Dopamine Receptor D4 (DRD4) Gene

A 2010 study of the evolutionary anthropology and health laboratory of Binghamton University in New York concluded that the DRD4 gene plays a major role in sexual behavior. This gene, in previous researches, was also linked to gambling and alcohol use.

What the group has found out is that individuals with certain variants of the DRD4 gene are more likely to have uncommitted sex.

The researchers share that the desire and excitement to cheat seems to originate in the brain’s pleasure and reward center, where the dopamine rush motivates those who are vulnerable.

However, the research stressed that not everyone with these genes commit infidelity, the study just suggests that a higher proportion of those with this genetic type are more likely to be engaged in such behavior.

The Allele 334 Gene

In 2008, the research of Karolinska Institute in Stockholm reveals that men who carry one or two copies of the gene were twice as likely to make men stray. The incidence of the gene was also statistically linked to how strong the bond the man has with his partner.

This is probable to happen because the allele 334 gene can affect the production of a hormone called Vassopresin, which has been shown to influence monogamy in animals.

Both researches have stressed though that genes alone will not determine whether a partner is likely to be unfaithful. A lot of social factors contribute to infidelity.

As discussed above, superiority, boredom, jealousy or insecurity trigger that feeling to cheat. Some believe that cheating is also common to people who grew up in homes where one of the parents was unfaithful, or who were exposed to environments where discreet cheating is somehow accepted.

Like alcoholism or drug abuse, infidelity is something one must and can fight against. Certain people are vulnerable but in the end, committing infidelity is a personal choice.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

Perhaps, the key is to maintain healthy and open communication lines between husband and wife. Knowing what causes infidelity can help prevent you from falling into the trap and ruining the relationship.

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5 Reasons Not To Confront A Cheating Spouse Without Evidence

kajay — Wed, 15 Dec 2010 21:00:09 +0000

Whaaat?!

Not confront? Wait. Before you over-react, this article is meant to help you be 100% fool proof sure that your beloved spouse is indeed cheating before you blab. You also need to ask yourself if you need to know the truth.

Do you really want to find out if your husband or wife is cheating on you?

Will you be ready to accept if indeed your fears are true? If you are, then it’s time to take a step – behind your spouse’s back and learn for yourself if your distrust has basis. — if your spouse is unfaithful.

Deep inside, you know if your husband or wife is cheating on you because you will get some sort of gut feeling within yourself that tells you something is terribly wrong…that something is ‘fishy’.

Initially, you begin to suspect on the undetermined whereabouts, cell phone turned off late at night and your spouse isn’t home yet, those constant business trips, late nights out supposedly with the boys or girlfriends, and even the frequent overtime but there’s no increase in paycheck.

Spouses who go away on supposed business trips much too often are likely prone to committing bouts of infidelity. Remember the rule – opportunity, motive and alibi.

Well, while men will always be men, it doesn’t mean women can’t do the same to cover their tracks. You’ll be surprised at the glib, sly way your spouse can fib and oh so quickly.

You see, they have mastered the art of lying without the nose twitching or eyes blinking or speech stuttering and are able to smoothly convince you all is normal. Remember the rule – opportunity, motive and alibi.

Confronting is useless once you’re face to face with such a pathological liar because you do not like the results.

Here’s why:

1. DENIAL TO HIGH HEAVENS. Then your spouse will turn around and say,”do you have proof? “If you haven’t, there’s no case. Period.

Your fights could become uglier over time. Frustrated at your spouse’s skill in handling clandestine affairs, you have no choice but to be a veritable nag till both of are so exhausted and you get a separation or divorce instead of dealing with the issue amicably.

2. BUT WE’RE JUST FRIENDS! Hah! You know better. Your instinct smells a rotting rat a mile away, but if you just put your finger on them and pin them both down especially if the accomplice in question is your best friend or coworker.

Your spouse will just shrug and accuse you instead. “You’re over-reacting, imagining things. How can you say that, of all people? Don’t you trust me? Your best friend, who’s practically part of the family? Really now?

3. I’M TIRED OF YOUR NAGGING, I’M LEAVING – YOU! Assuming the role of a beleaguered spouse, your husband or wife will tell neighbors that lately you’re becoming impossible to handle, suspicious, nagging and worse, violent.

Neighbors’ sympathy will be on him/her once your spouse leaves you because you drove him/her to doing it and the worst part is you’ll be the villain!

4. YOU’RE THE UNFAITHFUL ONE. This one’s for the record. Your spouse may claim you’re actually the one making it up to cover your own secret sin!

Aghast and indignant, you will be speechless and hurt that he/she can think that way about you when you have been faithful to your spouse all this time.

This will disarm you from trying to nag your spouse into admitting. If you do, the same old argument will continue because you don’t have a shred of proof, dear.

5. VIOLET WITH VIOLENCE. By this we mean either verbally abusive or physically violent, to make you stop haranguing or confronting your spouse at any point when he/she comes home late, reeking of cologne – woman’s or somewhat disheveled.

Don’t ever, ever try to catch a misbehaving thief – unless you are prepared to lose the battle round. As they say, when there’s smoke, there’s fire which can pretty much mean a sizzling affair in the roast. So, how can you be absolutely certain? HIRE A PRIVATE EYE.

The best way to find out if someone is cheating on you is to hire a private detective. Private detectives are usually good at what they do. They can quickly follow your spouse around and give you proof of their whereabouts like pictures hotel receipts, etc. and other possible rendezvous of where they may be cavorting.

So if it’s peace of mind you want and the certainty of really, really knowing for sure if your spouse is faithful or a lousy cheat, get a reputable private investigator to do the job. Ask yourself if you need to know the truth. Do you really want to find out if your husband or wife is cheating on you.

Being objective is always the best way to go when trying to figure out what went wrong and why in a relationship. The truth may sometimes be a bitter pill to swallow.

But many spouses believe it is always better to find out the truth, rather than walk through life warped in a lie. Nobody wants to go through life hurting because they were being lied to and be made a fool of.

A trouble-free married life can only be achieved if honesty and commitment are valued highly in a couple’s relationship.

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Why You Shouldn’t Blame Yourself For The Affair

kajay — Tue, 14 Dec 2010 23:59:08 +0000

It’s far too easy to kick and berate yourself, but you didn’t cause her bad conduct.

The deepest damage caused by discovering your loved one has been cheating on you is the psychological blow.

Yes, it tears up your heart and shreds your sense of security and trust, but it also makes you doubt yourself and your desirability.

It’s far too easy to play the blame game, and most destructive of all is blaming yourself for everything – taking all the responsibility from her and heaping self-punishment and shame upon yourself.

Chances are your unfaithful spouse was predisposed to it anyway.

He might have a history of cheating on former girlfriends, or she left her last husband because she found someone new and exciting.

While people who really try might be able to change, who we are will tend to win out over who we would rather be. Cheating is one of those things that is nearly impossible to break once that line’s been crossed.

Here are some things to bear in mind when those feelings of worthlessness or self-blame start to overwhelm you;

• While there may be some truth to the fact that a relationship takes two people, just because there’s a problem between you doesn’t give anyone free rein to break the rules, betray trust or violate your marital vows.

• In the end, we all do the best we can with the resources we have available to us. That could include the resources of maturity, self-discipline, personal integrity or sense of responsibility.

However, just as that doesn’t excuse a murderer for his crime, that also doesn’t excuse your cheating spouse from stepping out on you rather than first opening a dialog about things in your relationship that are changing or that aren’t working for any more.

• The fling or new love interest may have truly happened ‘by accident’, and once those emotional bonds formed, it may have been all but impossible to break the addiction.

But the only thing that prevented your partner from confiding his predicament to you is a selfish desire to continue the affair, or pure guilt (but guilt that wasn’t strong enough to make him END the affair.)

• She might just be a restless spirit without the maturity, self-discipline or social skills needed to work through the inevitable ups, downs and evolution of a committed relationship

Yeah, but . . .

Maybe you’re picking out areas where you, admittedly, might have fallen short, caused hurt or disappointment or been selfish, hurtful or oblivious.

Welcome to being human.

Every relationship requires care. Some ‘experts’ use the words ‘effort’ or ‘work’, but, really, the best relationships don’t mean that you’re having to ‘work at it’ as if it’s a chore.

What they need is attention, to be attuned to changing nuances and – importantly – responsive to them.

Some people and some relationships, while still entailing such care, are not hard work. Other people and relationships that are worth sustaining take a more attention and will experience more ripples in their smooth road.

But even a relationship that does require ‘work’ – massive amounts of it – can be worth fighting tooth and nail for. It’s up to the individuals involved and their mutual commitment to the work.

So just because your unfaithful ex didn’t have the wherewithal to work through challenges doesn’t reflect on you as a person or as a partner.

It reflects on your former mate’s social skills and ability to face the challenges of being in a committed relationship.

So give yourself a break, take care of yourself, go to the gym or get a make-over, and see what new romance is out there waiting for you.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Why Revenge Is Not The Best Way To Deal With A Cheating Partner

kajay — Tue, 14 Dec 2010 23:59:08 +0000

We know it hurts.

The temptation to exchange the helpless hurt you’re feeling with a stronger, meaner emotion like revenge might seem like a great change for you – but trust us, you really don’t want to ‘go there’.

Anger can be self-perpetuating. Rather than dissipate and leave you calm or happy, anger can linger behind to become a festering grudge that is never satisfied.

We’ve all read books or seen movies (Moby Dick is one example) where the obsession for revenge ends up bringing down everyone involved, innocent or not, including the revenge-seeker – but paradoxically sometimes not the object of the revenge. Yet, even if the revenge is successful, who actually wins?

No one.

Here are some reasons why seeking revenge is the wrong move;

• Think about the example you’re setting for your children
• Do you want your friends and neighbors to begin seeing you as unbalanced?
• If your spouse is actually innocent, do you want to lose face in front of him or her?
• What if you are hurt or embarrassed as a result?
• What if your boss or coworkers found out? It might cost you your job
• What about your personal integrity?
•What about your dignity?
• Do you really want to end up in the headlines, dead, jailed or hospitalized?
• Is ‘getting even’ going to get you what you REALLY want, which is the loving relationship and life you had before?

If there is any hope of ever having reconciliation, your actions must remind your loved one of what he or she first fell in love with when you met – not a raging, mean-spirited maniac.

The same goes for how a jury or judge might see you. The out-of-control or vindictive party doesn’t win the sympathy of the court.

Even deeper than this, what about your personal spiritual or religious beliefs? Most faiths teach the healing qualities of forgiveness and prayer, rather than pettiness or vengeance.

If you must lash out, do it harmlessly.

Write it out. DON’T send it, but write it down. Talk to your spouse in a letter. Don’t do this in email (it’s too easy to send). Write it in Word or another word-processing program or by hand on a piece of paper or in your journal.

Talk to him or her frankly, openly.

Tell him how much it hurts, how she emasculated you and crushed your heart. Tell him you hate him at that moment or that you hope she never finds someone else to love or who will love her as much as you did.

Hold nothing back! This is your place to vent, to work out — and through — your feelings of hurt, betrayal, loss of self-esteem, your disappointment in him, your disappointment in yourself.

DON’T SEND IT.

Seal it. Put it someplace safe. In the freezer, perhaps. Then, forget about it. Let it go. Send it away in a prayer or through meditation. Then later, take it out and have a ritual to destroy it. Burn it, bury it, flush it. The symbolism of it all will take hold in your subconscious.

You are ready to move on without those negative and destructive feelings.

If you had very deep-seated anger, people would understand that, and if you’re able to work through it to grow beyond your current limitations, people (incljuding you!) will admire, rather than condemn, you.

Continue your growth. Seek out a competent therapist or therapy group. Talk and get support from others who’ve been in your shoes. Help someone else who is hurting.

Even meditate on really and truly forgiving both your wayward spouse and the object of his or her affair.

We’re all only human, after all, and we all want and need love, security, friendship and stability. Perhaps there is a fuller and more rewarding relationship in your future.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Sudden Interest In Appearance – Is Your Partner Cheating?

kajay — Tue, 14 Dec 2010 23:59:08 +0000

It sure feels suspicious that she’s suddenly buying all those slinky little dresses, but you’re not going out anywhere together and she’s not wearing them privately for you.

He never used to shave so carefully before heading out to buy a six-pack — what’s going on?

You have this sinking feeling. Even though there’s no special occasion, suddenly your partner is spending as much time on his or her appearance as when you first started dating . . . so why aren’t you two going anywhere together – and why do you feel so left-out?

Little feels worse than picking up on those subconscious cues that a cheating partner gives off: you’re not invited to his private party.

Whatever is lighting up her eyes or putting the spring in his step has nothing to do with you, and, worse, if you dare broach the subject and actually ask her about it, she gets all evasive and tries to divert or misdirect you – or he looks at you like you’re crazy and gets annoyed, which only serves to further widen the emotional gulf growing between you.

Could you be misreading innocent behavior? Perhaps, but unfortunately, your gut reaction is probably a sign that your internal radar is working just fine.

While an occasional change in habits or behavior can be explained away or have a reasonable cause, usually an affair is accompanied by lots of changes, some big and some small, and will be signaled by a multitude of subtle (or not so subtle) behavioral give-aways that your intuition is snapping up.

So even if you end up employing a professional detective service to expose any infidelity your partner may be engaging in, or if you’re considering spying or setting her up yourself, first check in with your emotions/intuition/instinct; because, if you’re feeling any of these things, there’s something not quite right between you that needs to be addressed, even if she isn’t actually cheating – yet.

• Your intimacy is suddenly gone
• Emotional disconnect
• She’s finding a lot of fault with you and you can’t figure out why
• You have pangs of jealousy or hurt in response to her activities or conversation
• You feel left out of her life all of a sudden
• You feel inadequate and unwanted
• Housework gets neglected and you feel like he no longer cares about your living conditions, because his heart and mind are elsewhere
• You feel his sudden attentiveness is somehow false, or guilty, but you can’t put your finger on it
• If he or she wants more sex than usual, she wants it differently and you feel used rather than desired/loved
• He stops wanting sex altogether or shrinks from physical contact, making you feel rejected, hurt and abandoned
• She has a secret glow of happiness about her, infatuation or dreamy look, and you feel like an outsider
• She spends much more time than usual applying makeup, getting her hair done, making sure her clothes smell fresh and nice but she doesn’t seem to care if you enjoy it or even notice

Another give-away that your loved one might be cheating would be new clothes and gifts appearing without corresponding bills, receipts or credit card charges. It could be her lover is providing these gifts to her.

Like any of the other signs of cheating behavior, it’s not the act so much as the sudden, unexplained appearance of it, and it’s appearance in the context of the current state of your relationship.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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How To Use Reverse Cell Phone Detective To Catch Your Cheating Partner

kajay — Tue, 14 Dec 2010 23:59:08 +0000

Tired of those hang-ups? Or is your mate getting billed for mysterious calls (incoming OR outgoing) on his cell phone bill?

CLICK HERE TO KNOW MORE ABOUT REVERSE CELL PHONE DETECTIVE

It’s killing you. It’s just so obvious that something is going on, but you just can’t seem to get any proof or useful information.

If your spouse is cheating, you want to know with whom, and where that person lives, and where your spouse goes when she’s with him.

While calling him or her and telling them off (or to back off), may not do any good, having the proof for a court hearing or confrontation with your partner could be a very useful tool to have on your side.

The first thing you probably want to do is pick up the phone and dial the number back. If you just want to verify that, yup, it’s another man, and then hang up, you could certainly do that.

Be aware though that, if you’ve reached the object of your mate’s obsession, not only do they now know that you know (and then, of course, so will your mate) but they will have YOUR number – at work, or your cell, or any number you’re dialing from that’s different than the one your mate uses to contact her special ‘friend’.

You could invest in a private investigator to trace the number for you, but this is not a cheap option, and is generally included in a more comprehensive (and expensive) investigation, anyway.

You can check the cell phone bill for the number and where it originated.

If you share the same plan you MIGHT be able to get the company to furnish more information, if available, but generally a cheating spouse or lover is savvy enough to know that using the phone you both share is stupid (for his purposes).

While the internet has made cheating easier – it’s also made it easier to catch cheaters!

Almost everyone now has a home computer and internet access. If you already know the basics, like how to send emails, navigate the web using your browser and use search engines, then you probably will have no problems using simple services like a reverse-phone call detective.

A reverse-phone detective is a system consisting of millions of numbers in a searchable data base.

Much of the information is then hand-collected to round out the information relevant to each phone number. It will track down both land lines and cell phone numbers in its directory.

This system is not just for catching cheating spouses; you can use it to locate and stop a crank caller, find old friends or classmates or refresh your memory on how to get to a friend’s house by getting the address and neighborhood into to put into your GPS.

Reverse phone detective is simple to use. You’ll probably need to register or subscribe, since it’s usually a fee-based service, but after that all you need to do is to type the suspicious phone number into the box and press Enter on your keyboard.

What you’ll quickly get in return is the entity that number is assigned to, the street address, the type of phone (cell or land line) and the person’s name.

The cost of this subscription may run around $35, but that’s a low price to pay for the peace of mind — or irrefutable evidence — you’re looking for.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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When To Hire A Private Investigator To Catch Your Cheating Partner?

kajay — Tue, 14 Dec 2010 23:59:08 +0000

A lot depends on you and what your goal is.

Your immediate reaction may be to jump at the idea, or to shun it. Both reactions have merit. It depends on you, what you want to accomplish, and what stage your relationship is at.

This is such an emotionally charged issue, and it can cost you hundreds or thousands of dollars. Slow down and really think it all out so you can make the right choice in the long run, not just an emotional one.

Why do you need proof?

First, usually when you suspect your mate is cheating, chances are, you’re right. Since a private investigator is as expensive to hire as an attorney, it’s worth considering the cost vs. benefit.

If you’re not married or living together, even though it helps to find out the truth, do you really need the added hurt of concrete evidence?

Perhaps a better tact is to gather evidence yourself or decide that, if this relationship is making you that uncomfortable, there’s something wrong there anyway, and you should initiate a break up on your own.

If you need the proof for emotional closure or to gather evidence for your divorce hearing, then a PI is warranted – especially if the estate is worth a lot of money or if there have been damages to the well being of the children.

If you just need to know ‘just because’, it MIGHT not be an investment that makes sense.

One thing is good, though; a professional PI will be discreet and have the training and technology to gather evidence without blowing your cover – because the act of accusing a spouse of infidelity (particularly if you’re wrong) can cause a catastrophic failure of your future chances of reconciliation.

In fact, if your loved one was innocent, YOUR breach of trust could be all it takes to end your marriage.

Are you paranoid?

This isn’t a joke. Be very, very honest with yourself, or ask for feedback from a trusted friend. If you do have a suspicious nature, get your feelings hurt very easily, are hyper-sensitive to rejection etc., then it will make more sense to pay a professional who can bring you back OBJECTIVE evidence either way.

Can you afford it?

Hiring a Private Detective is hiring a trained professional, so it’s not cheap, starting at maybe $100/hr with a retainer. It can go up from there – count on about $200/hr + retainer, and then add up how long (how many hours) you think it will take.

Can you afford to make this financial investment, in addition to the probability of lawyer’s costs? If you think he’ll have to pay it, he might, but if his salary or your assets are not worth enough, you may be asking to get blood from a stone.

Don’t hang yourself out to dry financially, especially if you have children, are older with a low-to-moderate income, or rely on her company’s health plan for your medical care.

Selecting your PI

These are professionals, with advanced surveillance equipment, software and systems to track, identify and flag suspicious activities. They can find out who the ‘other’ man or woman actually is, if you don’t already know.

They’re computer savvy, equipped to be discreet, should be well versed in family law and estate issues, and have the racial and lifestyle mix of investigators to blend into the areas your spouse may frequent. They must also, by law, be licensed by the state.

Your job – Coming clean

If you go this route, you have to face the reality of being EXTREMELY honest and forthright with your PI, or he will be hampered in his efforts.

If you’re seeing a married woman and you suspect she’s cheating on you, too, (even with her legal husband!) your PI has to know that.

If you think you’re hubby is gay, or into abuse and hiring a Dominatrix, or if you originally met at a leather bar, tell him that. Don’t waste your time or money by making his job harder of less clear.

It isn’t their job to be judgmental, it’s their job to uncover any evidence you feel you need to make decisions and move forward with your life.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Are You Paranoid Or Is Your Partner Really Cheating?

kajay — Tue, 14 Dec 2010 23:59:08 +0000

Suspecting our loved one is seeing someone else behind our back will bring up all kinds of self-doubts, rationalizations, anger, guilt and self-punishment.

The biggest knee-jerk reaction is to admonish ourselves for being insecure or paranoid.

Sometimes it seems as if we’d rather convict ourselves of being unstable or otherwise at fault rather than face the prospect of having to accept the possibility that our relationship is in jeopardy.

We find ourselves making excuses for the secretive calls, the sense of alienation (what did WE do wrong?), his uncharacteristically short temper or her sudden withdrawal of affection.

Here’s the rub; just because you’re paranoid doesn’t mean she’s not cheating on you.

How can you shift the burden from blaming yourself to being able to objectively evaluate tell-tale indications that she’s slipping around on you?

As hard as it is during such an emotionally charged time, try to keep cool, level-headed and maintain your dignity as you gather evidence.

Here are some things to keep an eye out for:

• Changes from his or her usual habits and behavior. Any ‘symptom’ on its own might be innocent, but if it’s a sudden deviation from the norm, or there are several of them recently, they are likely red flags. Some examples would be:

1. Suddenly interest in sex/sudden withdrawal of sex
2. Overly sweet or attentive/forgetting birthdays and special occasions
3. Loss of interest in household tasks/Sudden unexplained delight in household tasks
4. New preoccupation with a new (for you as a couple)TV show or musical style, and you feel like there’s a private reason
5. Secrecy or defensiveness about phone calls, cell phone usage/habits, hang-ups (incoming), hushed/mumbled phone conversations and when you walk in they hang up.
6. Picking fights

Body language cues. These are subconscious signals that the cheating spouse will inadvertently give out. They can’t help it. It’s physiology.

1. Averting her gaze or an unnatural intense eye contact
2. Body shrinks away from you, avoiding physical contact
3. Touching/covering mouth, nose/rubbing behind ears
4. Flushing, nervousness. Controlled breathing.
5. Change in speech pattern—faster/slower/higher pitch/very deliberate word choices
6. Elaborate stories/excuses/explanations
7. Diversion (coughing fits/headaches/sudden sprain or pain when asked a touchy question – stalling or misdirecting
8. Turning body away from you

Physical/paper trail

1. Unexplained receipts for gas/items/travel/calls
2. New accounts – cell/email/bank
3. Change in hours/routine/working late/out of town trips
4. Frequent excuses for impromptu errands, long stays in the bathroom (talking on cell phone), new hobbies or meetings you’re not welcome to join
5. New clothes/gift items

Fixation on personal appearance/grooming/hygiene

1. New outfits
2. Shaving more than usual for routine outings – without you
3. More gym workouts/facials/hair
4. Sexy outfits appear but she never wears them for you

The list keeps going, but that should be enough that you already see it.

Now that you have a bit of objective evidence to go on, begin gathering your own paper trail for evidence/proof, should you decide to eventually confront her or seek out an attorney.

First though, it’s recommended you turn to a trusted therapist or counselor and get professional support and guidance so you can make your next decisions and moves with a clear head.

All this sounds very detached and rational, but you won’t be. You can’t be. This is your life, your trust and your family – this is your heart and soul being ripped out.

The most important thing you need to do for yourself is gather your support system of friends and loved ones to help you during this time. And be good to yourself.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Mistakes To Avoid When Trying To Catch A Cheating Partner

kajay — Tue, 14 Dec 2010 23:59:08 +0000

The evidence is mounting, and so is your desperation, anger or fear. Like in any other high-stress situation (like the death of parent, for instance), you are not thinking clearly.

You can’t. Your world is being shattered – even if it’s only in your own fearful mind.

The main thing you want to do is slow down.

Give your head and heart a chance to clear. Search the depths of your soul for what you really want to happen next.

• Divorce (you’re one foot out the door, anyway)
• Find and kill the bitch/bastard who’s tearing your family apart (While understandable, NOT a real option!)
• Reconciliation – get over the issue and go on together
• Healing – repair whatever was broken that lead t the affair and bring the romance back
• A truce for the kid’s sake.

Affairs can become much more volatile and dramatic once they’re found out than when they’re still hidden.

The trickiest part, though, is not putting yourself in danger should your attempts to spy on your wayward mate go awry, and not sabotaging a perfectly good, or fixable marriage, by running off half-cocked, shooting and asking questions later.

So get a game plan in place. Ask yourself:

• Are you looking for evidence for a divorce? If so, if you’ve already decided the marriage is broken and you don’t care to fix it, then hire a good PI and get the evidence that will stand up in your court trial, or that will convince your mate to roll over and give you the settlement you seek out of court.

It will also keep YOU out of the equation until the results are in, protecting your image, your dignity and your mission.

• Do you want to save your marriage? Are you seeking proof only so you can either find a way to heal the rift in your relationship or move on with your life, if you have to?

Then you can try gathering you own evidence and asking a professional counselor or therapist for step-by-step guidance and support.

• Do you plan to stay with him or her no matter what, but your curiosity is just killing you? Then seek out your therapist and support system and hold your breath for the pain. Many marriages do put up with known infidelity for years, or lifetimes.

It depends what you want, and if your spouse is the ‘kind’ sort who is happy to keep providing for the family while maintaining a lover on the side, or the ‘mean’ sort who will use your desire to keep him or her, no matter what, as license to become emotionally or physically abusive.

OK, now that you have a clear picture, let’s look at what you DON’T want to do, whatever your goals, ESPECIALLY without rock-solid proof that there is, indeed an affair going on.

DO NOT:

1. Lose your dignity. This is just a losing proposition all the way around. No shouting, screaming, throwing things, threats, dramatics, violence, vandalism.

2. Be caught snooping. What if she’s innocent? What if he’s not, but now he’s mad?

3. Put yourself at legal or physical risk. You don’t want to end up in jail or in court defending yourself!

4. Confront the ‘other’ man or woman. No love affair was ever ended because the hurt spouse whined about it. They are together because, as much as you hate it, they have feelings for each other, and those feelings actually may have some value.

Frankly, too, it is your spouse, not the ‘other’, who is more to blame. Your mate might not have been up front. Many innocent women and even men have fallen helplessly in love with someone they were fooled into thinking was single and available.

Once those bonds form it’s VERY hard to break them – actually, just as hard as it is for you to lose the one you love.

5. Enlist the help of friend or family to confront or ‘talk to’ the other man or woman.

6. Confront your spouse. Accusations, broken trust, sneaky underhanded behavior might just make your mate want to get as far from you as possible – especially if he or she was innocent!

DO:

1. Take care of yourself, pray, eat well, confide in trusted friends, seek advice and legal counsel

2. Try to be understanding and look at both sides. Is there just the slightest possibility that you weren’t completely blameless, yourself? Don’t beat yourself up about it but maybe you can forgive and let go more gently – or mutually come back together.

3. Protect your assets. No matter what, it doesn’t hurt to have your own account, savings, insurance, etc.

4. Be willing to listen and ask questions, rather than just blame and accuse and talk to vent at him or her. Your mate may actually have something constructive to say that’s worth hearing.

5. Be willing to let go. If that’s what’s best, once the dust settles, keep your heart open and stay kind and allow new good to come into both your lives. Life is too short to hold grudges.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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How To Cope With An Affair

kajay — Tue, 14 Dec 2010 23:59:08 +0000

It’s pretty much proven now. All those late-night phone calls and unexplained credit card charges really were signs that your loved one was stepping out on you.

How the heck are you supposed to handle things now?

1. Seek professional help in dealing with everything.

2. Enlist trusted friends and family to be a support system for you, no matter what you decide to do about your relationship now

3. Stay cool

4. Don’t lose your dignity

5. Don’t lash out

6. Don’t beat yourself up

7. Weigh your options – all of them.

8. Take your time – don’t rush into hasty decisions or moves that may backfire on you in the long run

9. If you take comfort in prayer, pray for forgiveness and healing – for all of you; yourself, your family, your partner AND your partner’s lover (Surprisingly, he or she is possibly the most innocent victim of all because many adulterers don’t even let a new love interest know they’re married or in a committed relationship until very strong bonds and expectations have already formed).

10. Take care of yourself emotionally, physically, psychologically.
Depending on how you both now wish to proceed, it will be time for either serious marriage counseling or legal advice.

Your choice of next step will have everything to do with how to cope. If you both want to stay in your marriage and work through this ultimate betrayal of trust, then you need to schedule sessions with your therapist both together and alone.

Seek your counselors’ advice and guidance on new ways to communicate, re-establish intimacy or tackle tricky discussions civilly and constructively.

Even if, on the other hand, you mutually decide to go your separate ways, you’ll want a therapist in addition to lawyers to help you make the split amicably.

Especially if there are young children involved, it’s best to remain civil and fair with each other if at all possible.

You’ll also want family counseling to help your children deal with the massive hurt, confusion and traumatic changes ahead.

If it’s already exploded into an ugly, bridge-burning mess, you still need support, guidance, good legal advice and all the friends you can gather.

Your life is going to change. Unless you two manage to work it out and continue your committed relationship, you’ll feel it most deeply:

• On Christmas or Hanukkah
• Valentine’s Day
• Your birthday
• Your partner’s birthday
• You children’s birthdays
• When ‘your’ show, song or movie comes on
• When your dog or cat either roams the house looking for your missing mate, or is taken away by your missing mate
• Your children’s ‘firsts’ (first word, first tooth, first graduation, first bike ride, first dance, etc.)

Whatever you do, should you decide to end your relationship, don’t blame yourself. Kicking yourself only stalls your healing process.
And yes, it will be a process.

There will be stages and fluctuations, progress and relapse, anger, grief, guilt, rage, despondency – the whole gamut of emotions.

The best advice is to let yourself acknowledge them, feel them but don’t indulge them/prolong them.

Allowing yourself to settle into a bitter outlook will alienate the people you need most – friends and possible new romantic interests.

Most of all, be kind to yourself.

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Healing After An Affair

kajay — Tue, 14 Dec 2010 23:59:08 +0000

There you have it; all the proof you need that your loved one has been involved with someone else – and maybe still is.

There’s no turning back from the knowledge, and depending on your joint decisions, you may be facing a divorce or a new, rebuilding stage in your marriage.

How you proceed, and how it affects your future, has as much to do with HOW you approach your decision as it does with what that decision actually is.

1. You’ve both decided to try and work it out. All the guilt, blame, deception, mistrust, betrayal – all of it are out in the open now. Now the real journey begins –

Now that you’ve gotten everything out in the open, is the worst over with?

Yes and no. The trust was broken. You’ve been betrayed. It can take a long time for that connection and level of trust to get reestablished – if ever.

You see your spouse differently now and maybe always will. Even now, you’ll be hyper-alert and overly sensitive for any signs of secrecy, evasion or suspicious behavior – possibly to the point of paranoia.

Unfortunately many couples who intend to stay together after an affair has taken place, eventually split for reasons that no longer have anything to do with the other man or woman actively being in their lives.

Go into it with the attitude of healing, not punishment, not blame-throwing. You’re both only human, after all.

Best advice is to not go it alone. Seek marriage counseling, and be sure you’re BOTH going. It will take a concerted effort on both your parts, but it’s possible that the result will be a deeper, stronger and more satisfying bond than you ever had before.

2. You’ve decided to split. There is just too much damage, or the affair has won out over your marriage. It’s time to re-group, get help and reinvent your life.

The absolute worse has happened. You find yourself single again, either because he left you for the other woman, or because you ditched her after you proved she was having an affair.

But now that the fireworks have died down, how do you stop the bleeding and move on with your life?

If there are children involved chances are you will be forced to maintain some sort of relationship with your ex. You’ll be dropping off your kids for visitation or he’ll be stopping by to pick them up.

She’ll send presents or show up for special occasions or have you bring everyone to her place for the celebrations.

In other words, it’s never really over. And this is tough to endure, especially if your lost love is forming a new family apart from you.

If there are no children, it might be ‘easier’ in that you’re not forced to stay in contact or actually see your ex again.

But that doesn’t mean there won’t be very deep and painful feelings of loss, grief, betrayal, hurt, inadequacy, loneliness, bitterness and anger.

Emptiness, being alone, after having lived with someone you love, can be a terrible burden, especially during holidays or special occasions, or when ‘your’ song or favorite movie is playing.

Try to remind yourself that it’s not the end of the world, even if it feels like it is. Whether or not someone manages to find a new love and create a wonderful new relationship has a lot to do with intent.

If you keep yourself bitter and closed, your new best friend and lover will never be able to get through those defenses to connect with you. Your ‘energy’ really can psychically push people away.

Again, don’t go it alone.

Seek out your good friends or a competent, trusted therapist. Do the work. Heal. The best revenge is having a happy life no matter what your ex did to hurt you!

The bottom line

Whichever of these scenarios you’re living, the best thing you can do is consciously concentrate on the good things in your life. Keep your circle of close friends near, pray and forgive or attend Church if that gives you comfort.

Once the dust settles, it’s critical to realize that after a certain point, after the damage has been done and you’ve licked your wounds, made your decisions and started on your new path, YOUR LIFE is again going to be based on YOUR decisions.

Right or wrong, happy or dismal, there comes a point when you must stop blaming your ex for your continued unhappiness, take control back and create the happy, fulfilling life you know you deserve.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Increased Time In Front Of the Computer- Is Your Partner Cheating?

kajay — Tue, 14 Dec 2010 23:59:08 +0000

Does increased time in front of the computer mean my partner is cheating on me?

More, if he’s just getting a thrill having cyber sex, or if she’s living a romantic fantasy with an anonymous email pal, is that really cheating?

Is there someone real on the other end who’s a threat to your relationship?

Maybe it doesn’t matter if it’s ‘real’ or not. What does matter is how your relationship is being affected by the activity.

One thing that all infidelity has in common is that it erodes your marriage by draining time, attention, money, intimacy – and, most importantly, trust.

Because, unless you have mutually agreed that one or both partners seeking sexual thrills online will be used as a way to actually enhance your erotic relationship together (i.e. it actually brings you two CLOSER), if she lies to you about it or he’s trying to cover his tracks, then there’s guilt or estrangement taking place.

Remember, cyber affairs are as much about deception, lies, hiding and betrayal as in-person sexual trysts.

Nowadays, access to sexual partners you’ll never meet, or actually connecting with a live illicit love interest, is extraordinarily easy. The internet has revolutionized infidelity.

True, people throughout history have always had their little fantasies; big screen idols, characters in a book, even super heroes in the comic books, could all be fuel for sexual or romantic frustration.

There’s no way to stop your spouse from having little fantasies, and they might even help spice things up in the bedroom. But when those fantasies have a very real chance of evolving into real life meetings, or if they already have, the damage can be devastating.

Some signs that computer activity is becoming a danger;

• The computer fantasy is being hidden — you’re being lied to
• The computer fantasy isn’t a fantasy – your spouse is actually planning to meet this person, if she hasn’t already
• The computer is being used to stay in touch with a Mistress or secret lover
• You discover that email traces etc are being erased
• Time spent on the computer is protectively guarded or your spouse is nervous or defensive about it

The more insidious aspect of computer infidelity is how it makes you feel – and this might also be the best self-test to take to determine if that activity you’re seeing actually qualifies as cheating, or not.

You already know how you FEEL when you suspect your loved one is hiding something from you, or that the emotional or sexual intimacy you once shared has been withdrawn.

It hurts and you feel abandoned or betrayed.

Just like with more traditional cheating, the little behavioral clues of a straying heart are pretty obvious to your internal radar:

1. Your loved one is suddenly secretive, evasive or reluctant to discuss what she’s doing
2. He reacts with inappropriate anger or defensiveness (or conversely, exaggerated false helpfulness) if you ask him about it
3. She has stopped wanting to snuggle or have sex – or suddenly wants a lot more sex, without the tender aspect to it
4. Housework and/or family time is uncharacteristically neglected
5. He brings flowers or little gifts or is especially and oddly attentive – out of guilt
6. She is glowing and the love is shining in her eyes – but the emotional gulf between you is miles wide
7. Suddenly his email account password has been changed, or she buys her own new computer, or her accounts or computer as newly password-protected
8. She’s bitchier, nags more, or he’s more critical and distant
9. New preoccupation with appearance and personal grooming
10. Exclusion – she has sudden new interests, hang-outs, friends, and you’re not welcome to share them with her

Should you suspect the worst, there are things you can do and software you can employ to track your partner’s activities online.

You can check his browser history or monitor his ‘alone time’ with the computer, but you’d better have some plan for how to proceed once you’ve got your evidence.

Before you embark on a spy mission that might blow the lid of your marriage, consider talking things over with a trusted therapist or counselor. This isn’t something you want to go into unprepared, or alone.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Emotional Infidelity Signs

kajay — Tue, 14 Dec 2010 23:52:25 +0000

So you dismiss your doubts, telling yourself that it was just an innocent chat.

If that’s true, why do you feel so hurt and betrayed?

While women do tend to indulge in these affairs more than men, they are also more likely to encourage them to move beyond fantasy; even into a possible new marriage. So don’t second-guess your intuition, or talk yourself into dismissing it.

Just because they’re not sleeping together doesn’t mean they’re not having an affair.

The intimacy, chemistry and secrecy that accompany emotional infidelity can unravel a marriage or relationship just as surely – but more insidiously – than a sexual one. The problem is, how can you tell for sure if it’s an emotional affair – or just a platonic friendship?

Below is a checklist of warning signs that their friendship is more than just ‘pals’.

1. Intimacy – confiding in him, not in you

This is one of the ways an emotional affair starts, and how it damages your marriage.

Just as, when you first began dating, you probably became the best of friends and confidants, sharing emotional intimacy and that romantic rush that signals the start of a love affair – she’s now sharing that with someone else.

If you’re feeling shut-out of her innermost thoughts and feelings, if she’s stopped talking to you about things like she used to and you feel your paths growing apart, it’s time to have a gentle talk.

2. Secrecy

If it’s really just a friendship, why won’t she let you come along with them? Why does she hang up when you walk in and then evade your questions?

When you’re not welcome to be part of their plans – or you are, but you feel like you’re the only one ‘out of the loop’ as they laugh at ‘inside jokes’ , the ‘odd-man out’ – chances are high that she’s having an emotional affair.

3. Alienation.

Let’s face it. You can feel the distance growing between you. The time and passion that was once invested in you as a couple is now being spent somewhere else.

Physically, perhaps, nothing has happened, but you feel the gulf as sharply as if they were making it right there in your marital bed – and, emotionally, that might just be what’s happening.

4. Giddiness – on her part.

If she’s suddenly really, really happy, glowing about life, but you sense the invisible wall there keeping you at arms’ length, that’s a clear and painful signal that her heart is straying to someone else.

All the little things that go along with a sexual affair – special attention to her appearance, new outfits, new interests or new musical tastes, or even avidly watching a new TV show, are all clues that she’s on a path to build a life apart from you, even if the affair is never sexually consummated.

And don’t think for a minute that, just because they’re not sleeping together, it doesn’t mean there’s not another ingredient.

5. Chemistry.

They’re buzzing with it. Sometimes the clandestine nature of emotional infidelity drives this untapped sexual chemistry to dizzying heights. Remember, scarcity and secrecy makes anything more appealing.

Combined with sexual attraction and physical/emotional chemistry, these elements of a sexual affair are even more damaging and gut-wrenching for the estranged partner than simple sexual adultery.

6. Inappropriate caretaking

This is a seldom mentioned aspect to emotional infidelity, but an important one, especially when it’s the man having an emotional affair.

It’s tough to take your loved-one to task for helping someone else out, but if he feels more than just a neighborly or chivalrous duty to assist a female friend or neighbor in a time of need – if he goes to great lengths to make things better for her, talk to her for long hours on the phone giving comfort or advice, or assists her by giving her money/paying her rent/buying her presents, then even if he never so much as gives her a kiss on the cheek, there’s a lot more there than simple altruism.

It’s really not hard to spot the signs of an emotional affair; just check in with your heart. It is, however, very hard, if not impossible, to defend your relationship against them.

And regardless of how or why they began, they can dissolve the foundations of you marriage from within – because emotional infidelity can happen right there in your own bed, when you’re with your loved one, but, in her heart and mind, she’s with her special friend.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Cheating In Relationships- Why Do People Cheat In Relationships?

kajay — Mon, 13 Dec 2010 14:43:29 +0000

It is often too easy to stereotype cheaters – either they are bad people (i.e., cheaters by nature) or they are good people in bad relationships.

While it is true that bad relationships and people who get a kick out of having a string of paramours would indeed seem like the perfect recipe for adulterous relationships, it is not always the case.

Some extramarital affairs, when brought out into the open, are so scandalous merely because the people involved are not who you’d expect to be lured into such a sordid drama.

In such cases (and in light of the fact that almost two-thirds of the population are straying from their partners) it is quite disturbing to contemplate that you may not be able to readily spot a cheater in a crowd – and may therefore be involved with one.

But although cheaters do not fit a certain mould, there are certain personality types that are more susceptible to cheating; there are also certain situations that may be fertile ground for infidelity to breed. These you need to know to guard your relationship:

1. Attention deficiency

No matter how long you two have been together, your partner needs your attention.

Sometimes you may be overburdened by all the mundane details of life – utility bills, college plans, mortgage, etc. – that it is more convenient to think that your spouse will understand the lapses now. You can always promise yourself you’ll make it up to him or her later…

But your partner needs you now. He or she may not be actively looking for attention elsewhere but if somebody else can afford to give the attention your partner craves, it may be all too tempting not to fall prey to the charms of the third party.

2. Affection-starved

This one is obvious; after all, we crave attention. In a relationship that has gone on for years maybe, a show of affection is something that gets taken for granted.

It may not mean that the love is gone but maybe you no longer feel the need to go the extra mile to shower your significant other with affection.

This makes it easy for another to sweet-talk their way into your spouse’s heart and fill the role that was supposedly yours to fill.

3. Boredom

Let’s face it: it takes extra effort to keep the flame in a relationship alive. Sometimes, though, we get too used to our partners that we tend to channel our energies elsewhere, confident in the belief that our partner is of the same mind.

From this point forward, however, the relationship starts to spiral downward – fast – and boredom is one of the first to set in. Going through the same routine day in and day out does make the relationship stale.

And that preps the stage for an illicit affair – or a way out of the boredom – to happen.

4. Excitement

Illicit love affairs translate to danger or excitement. True, some people are naturally drawn to the temptation but boredom in their current relationship can also push some people towards infidelity.

Cheating takes excitement to a whole new level – it’s not just the excitement of newfound passion but there’s also the attendant risk. The former feeds an almost forgotten need but the latter may give a different kind of adrenaline rush.

5. Sense of entitlement

Success is not a guarantee against insecurity. But successful people tend to manifest their insecurities through an elevated sense of self – that is, they feel deprived if they are denied certain privileges. One such privilege is to indulge in an extramarital affair.

Success, particularly in men, is sexy; it is desirable. Men who are at the top of the corporate ladder exude raw power and magnetism.

That alone draws a bevy of willing females into their lair. But the mindset of a successful man is really the determining factor on whether an affair will happen or not.

And men, because of that feeling that it is only their due – that, after all the hard work, they deserve the reward – would want to partake of what is being generously offered.

A person’s insecurity is really one of his greatest weaknesses. But then again, you should know that relationship requires constant work to make it work.

A relationship only fails because insecurity – instead of confidence and trust and respect – is cultivated in the present relationship.

A relationship, therefore, can – and will – survive the temptations of cheating if insecurity could not find a fertile ground where it can be sown.

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Spouse Cheating Online-A Few Things To Look Out For

kajay — Sat, 11 Dec 2010 20:38:41 +0000

How to catch your partner cheating online

Nowadays people eat, think breath and have affairs online. Knowing this, there must be a way to catch a partner who leaves clues behind online.

First thing to know

If you suspect your partner is cheating, she probably is.

Ouch.

Before you even bother checking his browsing history or saved chat sessions, go within and examine those nagging feelings of unease you’ve been experiencing in your romantic life with your partner. Something just isn’t right, and your gut is sending out flares that you’ve been ignoring.

Your intuition is smart; smarter than your rational thinking mind. Listen to it, or at least give it a fair hearing, before dismissing your concerns as paranoia or insecurity.

Next

Whether or not you consider ‘cyber sex’ cheating or if you suspect our spouse is actually engaging in a physical affair as well, your first cues are likely to be the same types of behavior that would incriminate in any extramarital affair.

• Evasiveness when asked questions about his activities
• Lies about what they’re doing
• Hiding or closing the screen they’re on when you walk in
• Increased time on the computer when you’re not there
• Suspicious credit card charges
• Suddenly finding things to be suspicious of in YOUR behavior (guilt/transference)
• New passwords/email accounts that you don’t share
• Increase or decrease in sex
• Emotional distance

As you can see, the same rules apply as in ‘real life’ cheating, the difference being that the internet makes everything so much easier. Also it makes it more anonymous, on the one hand, and more enticing as a fantasy on the other.

The internet can foster a false sense of closeness and intimacy. Sometimes the ease of sharing very detailed and personal private thoughts, feelings and events over the internet with even total strangers is frightening.

Not only is your heart at stake, depending on how irresponsible of gullible your mate is, your bank accounts and other private information may be at risk, too. So take action as soon as you even suspect internet infidelity.

Ways to catch him

1. Come right out and ask him. Sometimes the best way is the most direct way. If you’re able to open a calm dialog you might even be able to learn some things about what might be missing or broken in your relationship that you can both then work to fix – or you might learn you don’t even want to try and save it.

2. Learn all you can about checking browser history, favorite places, etc., or get special tracking software.

3. Hire a private detective to do your computer skullduggery and also keep track of his physical movements and meetings

The important thing is not to lose track of what’s really important and at stake; your intimate loving commitment. It’s not just the ‘chase’ for an answer, as important as that is.

Frankly, unless you’re seeking grounds for a divorce, what you’re really wanting is to restore the lost trust and closeness of your partnership. Whether online or live, an extra marital affair is a breach of the confidence and trust, and a symptom of a deeper underlying issue.

Once you’ve decided for yourself what your boundaries and wishes really are, it’s time to enlist the help of a therapist or counselor to help you work through your next moves and how you’ll deal with the ramifications of them.

Don’t go it alone.

Cheating is lying, it’s deception, it’s betrayal. You’ll experience anger, disillusionment, hurt, and more. Gather your close friends or a trusted advisor to help you through the tough times ahead, whether you want to repair your relationship or leave it and rebuild.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Should You Spy On Your Cheating Partner?

kajay — Sat, 11 Dec 2010 20:33:40 +0000

Is it time to Hire a Detective to Spy on My Cheating Spouse?

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

Some things to consider before bringing in the ‘big guns’? You’ve got so many suspicions and clues that she’s stepping out on you but you just can’t prove it.

He’s obviously not working late, and the bank account has been dwindling –Is it time to call in a private investigator to catch my unfaithful partner?

The first thing to consider is your immediate danger; are you at risk for STDs, financial ruin? Are you looking to gather evidence for a divorce? Just what is your intent, besides simply to know, once and for all, and be able to prove, that your loved one is being unfaithful?

The idea of hiring a private detective goes against the grain for most people, and for good reason; it’s a betrayal of trust. But your partner is also betraying the trust in the marriage by having an affair in the first place; does ‘tit for tat’ work for you?

What is your goal?

Are you looking for proof, or evidence?

Are looking for the pieces that might exonerate (prove innocent) the woman you love, so you can stay in your relationship? What if the facts that come back blow that dream to smithereens?

Even if you think you’re prepared, the hard cold proof that your partner is seeking the love and company of someone else will hurt — a lot. Have you come up with a plan for what to do if the investigator does produce that ‘smoking gun’?

Do you want to pave the way for a good court settlement?

If this is your goal, then you’ve pretty much already convicted your spouse and are just looking now to move forward legally.

Admittedly, getting indisputable proof is critical for court proceedings where the injured party is seeking substantial property or monetary damages. Evidence garnered by a private investigator carries more weight in court than hear say and suspicions.

But the act of hiring a private investigator also sends a clear message of intent, so you’d best be certain of what that intent is, before you start events moving.

Relationship disputes are sensitive, emotional and explosive enough, so try to precede with some idea, ahead of time, of the ramifications of any actions you initiate.

How much evidence have you gathered on your own?

Chances are, you’ve already gathered a list of suspicious actions, credit card charges, eye-witness testimony from friends or neighbors or otherwise have some evidence you found on your own.

Unless you’re planning or counting on a court battle that will go in your favor, does your evidence convince YOU he’s having an affair?

If you check in with your gut or intuition, you may find you already know the answers.

While hiring a private detective might help blow the lid off things and possibly set you two on a course for healing, more likely the act of bringing in an investigator may sever those last threads of trust in your marriage. Are you prepared for that?

Can you afford the services of a private investigator?

Be very honest. If you don’t have the means, if your joint assets are meager, you’ll be paying substantial legal costs. Is there enough in your estate to justify the extra expense of the detective?

Closing Thoughts

Have you decided what your goal is; reconciliation or divorce?

Do you have the means to hire a private detective?

Are you prepared emotionally for the results of an investigation? If all your justifications and dismissals are suddenly proven wrong and there’s no doubt your spouse is cheating on you, then you have to face the situation and take action.

Be kind to yourself; enlist the help and support of close friends or a good therapist to help you through the rough road ahead.

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Sexual Indifference- Is Your Partner Cheating?

kajay — Sat, 11 Dec 2010 20:26:53 +0000

Why Doesn’t He Want Sex Anymore?

Does sexual indifference mean he’s cheating?

Men want sex. He’s always wanted you before.

You have the sexiest woman you’ve ever met. But lately she just never feels well enough. Are these warning signs of a cheating spouse?

Let’s face it, after the initial bloom of new love wears off, there’s got to be some slowing down of the hungry lust for each other’s bodies, right?

Well, no, that’s not really true. If you’ve had a satisfying sexual chemistry and even if you’d fallen into somewhat of a routine, you still placed importance on finding the time and energy for that crucial bonding aspect of your relationship; physical intimacy.

Now there’s a change, and suddenly you begin wondering if maybe you relationship is in trouble. Does lack of interest in sex signal a possible affair?

The truth is, even if you’re the one who hasn’t been the main initiator of sex, the thought of him going elsewhere for it is like a blow to the stomach. How can you tell if he’s really just feeling stressed at the office or if she really has a bad headache again?

Check your radar for other tell-tale signs of trouble;

1. Less closeness, less intimate conversation

2. Jumpier, tenser behavior overall

3. More defensive or snappy behavior

4. More criticizing or nit-picking

5. More nagging or blaming

6. More secrecy, more protectiveness when it comes to personal records and objects (purses, briefcases, cell phones, computers

7. Changes in dress, appearance or demeanor, for the better, but excluding you

8. Sudden and unexplained involvement in new hobbies

9. Sudden preoccupation

10. Becomes interested in new music, new foods, new activities that seem totally independent of you and isn’t shared with you — or is forced on you

11. More or less attentiveness

12. More or less gift-giving

13. Guilty body language

14. Anger or offense if you question anything suspicious

There are some other warning signs:

1. He suddenly starts doing his own laundry

2. She stops discussing her day at the office

3. She suddenly stops mentioning her ‘special friend’ at the office

4. You find birth control devices that don’t make sense, like condoms even though you’ve had a vasectomy

5. He’s gotten a new, separate cell phone account

6. Suddenly she shuts down her computer screen when you walk in

7. He mumbles low on the phone, turns his back to you, hangs up or finished his conversation suddenly in an exaggeratedly casual way

Now, also be honest with yourself. Have you been an attentive sexual partner? Have you tried to share his or her fantasies and enthusiasm for sex? While it’s certainly possible, even likely he’s having an affair; sometimes the answer takes more soul-searching.

Sex is intimate. Of course. But the sharing of sex is sharing on a deep level that exposes our fears, weaknesses, needs and kinks.

If you’ve rejected or criticized his sexual fantasies and refused to live the out with him, or if you’ve stopped making her feel safe, appreciated and cherished in other areas of your lives together, your partner may simply shut down and turn off.

Whatever the cause (cheating or other problems in your relationship), it won’t go away on its own. Try to be mature, address the issue, and if needed don’t be afraid to enlist professional help. The survival of your marriage is at stake.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Infidelity Signs-Working Long Hours And Coming Home Late

kajay — Sat, 11 Dec 2010 20:18:02 +0000

Honey, I’ve Got to Work Late….Again.

Are all those late nights at the office really a sign of an affair?

You might not want to seem paranoid, but he’s been working late an awful lot lately. How can you tell fear from fact?
For one thing, don’t look JUST at his late nights.

It should be easy enough to check that paycheck stub and see if he’s really putting in those hours at work. So, really, betraying HIS trust by sneaking around spying and digging might not be your first best reaction.

Think holistically; be honest with yourself.

Has your relationship been lackluster/strained/tedious/monotonous/stressful/boring?

Have there been any changes, things that suddenly, out of the blue, seem to be changing independent of your relationship with him?

Is he wanting you to be a part of this change or trying to keep you out of it?

What about your intimacy?

More/less sex, more/less late, deep midnight talks, more/less play activities? Do you feel like there’s a widening emotional gap between you, that the closeness is suddenly gone, or that you find you have to walk on eggshells around her now?

What about her phone habits?

Are there more hushed conversations, private calls, hang-ups, unknown numbers appearing on the bill, or does he carry his cell phone with him everywhere now?

Has his/her attention to personal appearance/hygiene/wardrobe suddenly grown?

That sexy little black thing you noticed in the drawer was new, now it looks used, but she didn’t wear it for you, so?

Does she have new interests, activities and tastes?

Where did that classical CD come from (she’s never listened to classical a day in her life since you’ve know her)? Or that movie ticket stub from last week – you haven’t seen any movies together for years.

Why his sudden preoccupation with a new TV show that airs on a channel you don’t even subscribe to?

Why do you feel shut out and unwelcome?

Speaking of the office

Has she been glowing about a ‘special friend’ she works with, or a new employee who went out to lunch with her? Feeling just a twinge of jealousy there?

Now what?

First, before you go running off to start a flat-out spy mission, bear in mind that whatever you do, you might be caught at it just like you’re trying to catch him.

If you feel betrayed and angry, imagine how he’ll feel if he’s actually innocent and he realizes the extent of your mistrust.

Not to excuse a real adulterer, leave you a victim or abandon you in an abusive relationship; if those are the cases you must take action.

But please don’t confront him with accusations or ultimatums half-cocked. Wait until you thoroughly think through the ramifications of anything you’re considering.

Also, this isn’t to make you feel you should turn a blind eye, or that you’re just being insecure or paranoid.

But remember; Slow down and try to logically plan out your next steps, while staying tuned in to your internal radar/intuition as well as your set of personal ethics.

Here’s the caveat; He might just be working those long hours to buy you a special present, a new home for you both, or to make up for some innocent financial shortfall (maybe an investment blunder he made).

There are enough possibilities that it makes sense for you to take your time and try to see the big picture before deciding to take action.

More, if you DO gather evidence or hire a detective to prove his infidelity, you’ll be left with a very clear call to action.

If you’re not sure, on the other hand, you might be able to ignore it (sweep it under the rug), go on with life as usual and decide the marriage or relationship is important enough that you want to preserve it at all costs.

Only you can make that call, and no one has the right to bully or pressure you into making a break you aren’t comfortable with.

But if you have hard evidence right there that you can’t dismiss, and especially if the cheater realizes it, you’ll pretty much HAVE to take action or lose face with your spouse.

This is the hardest thing that NO ONE WILL TELL YOU.

If you lose face, (if your lover realizes that you want to stay with him, EVEN WITH IRREFUTABLE evidence of his guilt), you might be putting yourself in a very dangerous position. If he loses respect for you and/or loses the fear of your reprisal, he might not only become bolder and escalate the affair, he could even become abusive.

All reasons to slow down and think things out carefully before engaging in serious skullduggery.

Sorry if you wanted an easier solution.

If you hoped to just take a quiz or look over a bullet list and get immediate answers, solutions or closure, in truth, no article or test will help.

The only way to address this to do some serious soul-searching, especially if there are children involved or you really value and want to preserve your marriage. There are personal compromises that many people make to hang on to the most import things they need in life.

A lot of self-help articles and advice columns will encourage you to expose the scoundrel, take action, ditch the relationship and move on, etc., but only YOU know what you really want long-term, what your personal values and needs are, and no one but you (or you and your young children) will have to live with the choices you make.

They are your decisions, and once you know in your own heart what those decisions have to be, you need to stand by them.

Ditching a ‘broken’ marriage because the books say to, for instance, is easy to write, and could possibly make you happy, but may also end up being be a terrible mistake for you to live with the rest of your life.

Your best bet is to seek professional help FIRST, in the form of a competent therapist or counselor. Make decisions carefully with his or her help and listen to your instincts. Your intuition probably has the best bead on things.

And — Take care of yourself. Surround yourself with trusted friends during this trying time. Good luck.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Infidelity And Finance

kajay — Sat, 11 Dec 2010 20:15:41 +0000

As hard as it is on your ego and your emotions, a cheating spouse can do even deeper damage by funneling funds into her illicit relationship. Luckily, such misbehavior can be pretty easily tracked, and can provide needed court evidence, to boot.

CLICK HERE TO KNOW MORE ABOUT iPHONE SPY STICK

If you’re on the trail to find out if your spouse may be cheating on you, or looking to gather concrete evidence for use in a confrontation or court battle, the surest and least subjective bits of proof your can have are financial bills or statements.

An overview

When a wife or husband is having an affair, they will want to be in control of their own money more than before.

She may apply for new credit cards just in her name, have unexplained increases in gas usage (which will show up either on their odometers or gas cards), get a separate cell phone account with a separate bill (that may not even come to your home) or any number of odd and recent (new) activities.

The biggest thing to be sure of is your familiarity with their spending habits in the past, when you were sure you two were a ‘real’ couple and nothing had yet come between you.

It’s likely you wanted to combine assets and accounts, take advantage of family phone plans, make real estate purchases in both your names, even put cars in both your names.

Then something changed. Your intuition is nagging, there are niggling little chinks in your usual rhythm, and your suspicions, if not already validated, are crying for your attention.

Here are some changes that might signal an affair.

• New, separate cell phone account
• Unexplained charges on the credit card
• New credit cards issued in just her name
• He carries cash, a lot of it, when he didn’t before
• She opens a separate bank account
• You find receipts for items that don’t make sense, and that you can’t find in your home or car
• You find receipts for stops at the gas station above and beyond what you used to
• You find receipts for deposits or withdrawals from your joint account that don’t make sense
• Restaurant receipts or movie stubs that have nothing to do with you
• Unaccounted-for cell phone charges/mysterious numbers being dialed or incoming
• ATM receipts (over and above the norm)
• You find items or gifts that aren’t for you, but which appear with no corresponding bill – she’s living above her salary, and someone else must be providing the extras to her

Other red flags

Take a careful look at his paycheck stubs and your account balances. Is he taking a lot of cash out of his paycheck when before it was all pooled into your joint accounts, to pay your mutual bills?

Is she working longer hours or extra days for overtime but her paycheck or bank deposit is staying the same?

Is there a bill coming in that she won’t let you see? It could be:

• A motel room stay
• A separate rent payment (maybe he’s setting her up in a her apartment)
• A safe-deposit box where she’s getting mail and gifts from her lover
• Clothing, electronics (cellphone) or cosmetic purchases that she might not want to let your know about

One way she might cover her tracks is a PayPal account. This must be linked to an existing account but there will be no paper bill and no withdrawal from your accounts if she’s making deposits into it. It’s an easy way for her to charge things without anything appearing on a credit card statement.

There are countless software and spyware systems available now for the sole purpose of tracking phone calls and conversations. Using these to back-up and provide supportive proof of marital misdoings will be crucial should you decide to pursue a legal battle.

Closing Thoughts

Your intuition gave you the heads-up that there was something going on, and by carefully and discreetly checking and keeping track of every financial paper trail possible, you have the best likelihood of catching your cheating spouse, not just for your personal satisfaction, but to satisfy the courts, as well.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Confronting A Cheating Spouse

kajay — Sat, 11 Dec 2010 20:08:45 +0000

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

Perhaps one of the hardest, trickiest and bravest things you’ll ever find yourself doing is actually saying the words “I know you’re sleeping with her”

Does confronting your cheating partner have to be a brawl? Will it entail yelling, accusations, blame-throwing, object throwing, tears, hatred, slammed doors?

That depends on the people involved, and also HOW you bring it up. Here’s some advice on addressing your concerns to your unfaithful husband, wife, boyfriend or girlfriend.

First gather your evidence

This will be very hard but it’s important; Don’t just walk in and start screaming accusations. Take your time, relax and think about the ramifications of what you’re doing. In other words, what result do you want (fix the marriage?

Get a good divorce settlement? Are there children involved? Large estates?) So carefully gather a paper-trail for yourself, first, for your lawyer second.

One thing your paper-tail can do is keep you from getting side-tracked or fooling yourself into diminishing the truth of things that are too hard to bear.

Be safe

Is there the possibility of violence, STDs, huge financial loss? Are the children at stake? Weigh your concerns carefully before broaching he subject, and consider how your partner might react.

Maybe it would be safest to initiate the talk in a place with people or family around to keep things from escalating out of hand.

Get checked for STDs

And then refrain from sex until a resolution is reached. This way there will be no surprises that could backfire on you in litigation, and if you’re STD free, can prevent you for contracting anything from your partner’s misdeeds.

Protect your children

They may or may not be in physical danger if things go bad during the discussion, but in any event you don’t want them to experience the trauma of your drama. Most kids want Mommy and Daddy to always be there and be there together.

Depending on how old they are, knowing inappropriate details of your intimate problems can traumatize them either short term or forever.

Get help

It is smart to seek out a therapist or counselor to first, go over the evidence you have and second, to help you prepare a game plan for addressing things with your partner. Possibly your counselor might even agree or advise that you open discussions ‘in session’ with her as moderator.

Be dignified

This is more than just for appearances. By keeping your cool, you can think out each step and each word for maximum benefit. It’s harder for the accused to turn the tables on you and make you out to be either paranoid or turn you, the victim, into the problem.

Ask questions and LISTEN to the answers

Especially if you want to save your marriage, if you can get a real dialog going, you might actually unearth some facts that could be used to heal any rift or misunderstanding – or give both parties a chance to calmly and maturely acknowledge an irreparable fracture in the bond.

In this case, there is a possibility a break could be mutually agreed upon or at least ‘friendly’, in the legal sense, that there will be no emotional bloodshed and you two might go on to be civil ‘Ex’s’.

Have a plan for the aftermath

Have friends, family, a therapist, someone you trust to be there for you when the dust settles. Whether the end result is working to repair the relationship or to split and build new lives, you’ll need all the support your can get to help you get through whatever is to come.

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Common Excuses Cheaters Give

kajay — Sat, 11 Dec 2010 20:05:13 +0000

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

You Have a Headache, Again?

These common excuses could be a warning that your loved one is cheating.

One thing cheaters look for is a way to worm their way out of an uncomfortable situation – like actually being intimate with you. Here are some stories and excuses cheaters may use to avoid giving you straight answers.

• I’ve not been feeling well – I think I have a fever
• Listen to this cough I’m getting . . .
• My head is killing me
• I wrenched my shoulder/hip/leg/back/neck
• I’m just wiped out today
• I’m just so stressed out at work
• My friend is going through a really bad time and I can’t have a good time when I’m worried about them
• You’re putting so much pressure on me, it’s supposed to be spontaneous
• Hey, we’re an old married couple now, isn’t it nice to just relax?
• My car broke down/I had to work late/I couldn’t find my wallet
• My dog is sick
• Why are you being paranoid, I’m here, aren’t I?
• What’s wrong with you, how insecure are you?
• I can’t believe you’d asking me that
• Only guilty people always suspect others of doing bad things/Only liars accuse other people of lying

See the pattern?

You can tell after a while that these emergencies and illnesses always happen at the wrong (or right) times and for just the right durations. Of course they don’t ring true. Your intuition can tell you in a heartbeat what your mind may be unwilling to face.

The Undercurrent

She is feeling guilty and doesn’t want to have to deal with a confrontation or your hurt feelings. So, rather than be brave and open enough to face the challenge and risks ahead, she pretends, lies, diverts or misdirects your attention or turns the tables and puts the blame on you. Worse, she might actually get her jollies knowing she’s tricking you while she’s stepping out on you.

You’re being lied to.

No matter if it’s a ‘white lie’ to spare our feelings or a more malicious intent to deceive us, we have to face the fact that such excuses are actually LIES. They are untruths our trusted and loved partners are telling us to get away with behaviors that they know you would not approve of or that would hurt you. A betrayal of trust.

Maybe he doesn’t want to end the relationship.

At least not completely, but just because he doesn’t want to terminate it doesn’t mean his intent is to stay ‘in’ the marriage or relationship. That is, not in a fully committed, fully intimate way.

Maybe he wants to hang on to the security of a relationship because it permits him to play without having to sacrifice too much, or he wants to keep his image/reputation/ lifestyle/address/married couple friends you both have. He’s brave enough to play dirty but not brave enough to face the music.

It’s like a kid who feels very adventurous and grown up, until he can’t find his Mommy.

Cheaters can be very insecure.

He/She is confused

. . .and trying out new relationships to see what direction she wants to go in. A pretty selfish and grim game to play when there’s someone at home whose heart is being torn apart.

The remedy

This is hard. You can either turn a blind eye and stay in the relationship no matter what, hoping that the fling will pass and you’ll get your lover back, or you can address it – and risk losing the relationship altogether.

Or if you’re one of the strong and lucky ones you can draw the line in the sand, and call an end to the charade by moving on with your life. No matter which course you take, there will be massive emotional damage that will hit you sooner or later, so you’ll want the support of a good friend or counselor to help you move forward.

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Infidelity Quiz

kajay — Sat, 11 Dec 2010 19:59:13 +0000

A quick quiz for suspicious spouses. This isn’t a fun quiz, and there are no prizes for getting the top score. Well, maybe there is, if realizing your hubby or wife is stepping out on you can help you take action.

There are few things in life more hurtful than suspecting your loved one is being unfaithful to you – except knowing it for a fact. The difference is, once you accept or prove it, it frees you up to take action.

With this in mind, here are a few True/False questions to answer:

1. I feel like my partner is withdrawing emotionally

2. We’re having less sex

3. We’re having more sex, and there’s no special reason for it

4. My partner is being more attentive

5. My partner is being less attentive

6. My partner is touchier

7. My partner is sick/headachey/crampy/tired/stressed every time I want to be close or intimate

8. My partner avoids answering my questions directly

9. My partner is blaming me for things or picking fights

10. My partner is more concerned than usual with his or her looks/body/wardrobe

11. My partner has new favorite things that I can’t account for and that we two don’t share

12. My partner has new friends/a new hangout and I am not welcome

13. He doesn’t want me cleaning out pockets/She doesn’t want you looking in her purse

14. My partner finds reasons to be away a lot more often with friends or shopping than he or she used to

15. My partner works late more often but the paycheck isn’t reflecting more money

If you can answer three or more of these questions Yes, it looks like he might be doing exactly what your gut is telling you he/she’s doing — having an affair.

Most women, especially, tend to bury their intuitive suspicions under layers of guilt and self-deception.

When their intuition starts screaming out warnings about red flags it’s perceiving, they rationalize them away, actually chastising ourselves for being paranoid, insecure or untrusting – self-doubt that our spouse is more than happy to perpetuate.

Why not?

It helps him get away clean and earns him even more power and leverage in the relationship. He might even begin to ‘play you’ to get a sick thrill out of it. Don’t let him.

The best tact is to just address any concerns immediately, before they escalate into something deeper or darker.

The longer you cast a blind eye his way, the bolder his behavior may become. It’s called enabling. It’s a sad and very disturbing concept that by overriding our innate perceptiveness to help preserve the fantasy that’s so important to us, we might be giving him, or her, the very tools needed to escalate their affair, even make it blatant.

Painful Cheater’s Psychology

This is something very rarely brought up in discussions about cheating but the psychology is there; cheating, as we know is a powerful aphrodisiac, and some folks ‘get off’ knowing that they’re hurting their husband/wives at the same time as they’re enjoying their new love interest. This can lead to a complex and very damaging psychological power play.

Don’t let yourself be drawn into that.

Nip that cheater in the bud.

Talk to him as soon as you ‘feel’ something isn’t right. Chances are you’re not just being paranoid. If your relationship can be saved, this is the easiest time to do it. If that doesn’t work, seek professional help, get out of the relationship or get the two of you into marriage counseling.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Secretive Phone Calls – Is Your Partner Cheating?

kajay — Sat, 11 Dec 2010 19:55:12 +0000

Those secretive phone calls may be completely innocent – or they could mean your partner is cheating.

It could all be a series of coincidences, but it’s sure looking suspicious.

CLICK HERE TO KNOW MORE ABOUT REVERSE CELL PHONE DETECTIVE

You innocently walk into the room while he’s on his cell phone, and suddenly he startles and hangs up, or he begins mumbling so words so low you can’t understand before snapping the phone closed.

Either that or she adopts an overly-casual nonchalance and actually raises her voice as if she’s wrapping up a business call, and hangs up, again, as soon as she can get that phone closed.

Are these signs of an affair?

What you need to pay attention to are changes in his usual behavior. For instance, staying up late talking on the phone at the other end of the house (when you’re not likely to notice because you’re asleep), when before he regularly conked out early and had no problem interfering with your TV show by sitting next to you on the couch, talking on the phone, to his buddy, about the game.

Before he’d just reach over and answer the phone. Now he jumps up and sidles into a distant room, heads out for a walk, or takes it in the bath room – and takes a very long time in the bath room.

If before you shared a cell phone plan, and now he suddenly decides he needs a separate plan (maybe you weren’t even told and discover the new phone by accident) it’s a pretty plain red flag.

He carries his cell phone everywhere with him, as if it’s glued to him.

More, has his overall demeanor changed? You can tell if he’s been pulling away, distracted, more easily angered or suddenly, inexplicably too sweet and overly attentive.

Hang ups

Yup, just like in the old days, if you suddenly get a lot of hang-ups when the caller hears your voice, it’s pretty suspicious that the ‘other’ guy or gal is trying to reach your spouse.

Nowadays caller ID will record numbers — but callers have gotten savvy. Many telemarketers with toll-free (800) lines can now call you and have YOUR local prefix show up, fooling you into answering the phone.

Computer savvy phone users may be able to employ similar techniques. More, they can block their numbers from showing up altogether too.

You can combat some of this by blocking such numbers from ringing through at all. Check your phone plan (landline or cell) for this option. It may eliminate one of the symptoms, but of course it won’t cure the illness. Your spouse is still:

• Shutting you out/keeping things from you
• Lying to you
• Betraying your trust
• Compromising the integrity of your relationship
• Insulting you
• Cheating

How to prove it

Unfortunately, short of actually hearing an incriminating conversation or coming right out and asking (but don’t expect to get an honest answer), you’ll have to do some digging. Calls can be traced on a land-line (with legal restrictions, so you’d need to check with a lawyer about the rules).

Cell phones make it very easy for cheaters to stay in touch with their lovers – on a walk, shopping, driving, even in the bathroom. Presumably your straying spouse has set up a separate account (your name isn’t on it) which not only means the bill can be sent to a difference address, but legally they can’t give you information about what’s on it.

Of course, if you can get your hands on the phone, you can check the call history. Quickly write them down and then consider your options (so you’re not caught flat-footed with his phone in your hand – you’re not ready to confront him constructively yet).

When you’ve had a while to think things out, call unfamiliar or suspicious numbers if you must, but keep your cool and act like it’s just a casual inquiry because the number showed up on the bill, and ask nicely who you’ve dialed.

If you have access to none of this you might have to get some reverse-phone book (available online) to give your info without having to actually make the call you are dreading. At least then you can add it to your paper-trail of evidence in case you ever decide to either confront your spouse or seek legal counsel.

Worst case, hire a private detective.

One last thought

Whether it’s suspicious calls, changes in your bank statements, sudden withdrawal of intimacy (or increased demand), remember that it’s the entire picture you need to start monitoring.

Those hang-ups or unexplained calls might be innocent, but combined with any of the other myriad red flags, you have pretty strong evidence that your loved one is also an adulterer. Don’t go it alone. Seek the support of a good friend of therapist.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Surveillance Equipments to Use to Catch a Cheating Spouse

kajay — Sat, 11 Dec 2010 18:18:18 +0000

Desperate times call for desperate measures. If you have been wishing to catch your spouse in the act of cheating but are having no success so far, you could use the help of surveillance equipments.

CLICK HERE TO CATCH A CHEATER

Technology is created for a reason. And hunting down your spouse’s illicit affair is surely a valid way to employ the use of technology. Nowadays, there is a wide array of surveillance equipments available at your disposal.

Some are costly, but you do not really need to settle for a well-known brand if you are only using it for a short period of time.

GPS

CLICK HERE FOR GPS TRACKING

The Global Positioning System or GPS is an effective device that can track the location of a person anytime. It relies on the feed by satellites circling the earth.

You can attach the GPS in your spouse’s car so that you will know his or her whereabouts at any given time. If your spouse is supposed to be at work at this particular time but your GPS report says he or she is on some hotel downtown, then this is definitely a strong evidence that something’s going on.

Recent versions of GPS are tiny enough for anyone not to easily notice it. They are no bigger than your cell phone and you can attach them anywhere under the vehicle. Make sure you remove the GPS occasionally especially if your spouse is about to wash the car.

Hidden Camera

CLICK HERE FOR RECON LOW LIGHT HIDDEN CAMERA

Hidden cameras are perfect for getting graphic images of your spouse and his or her lover in the act. If you have a feeling your spouse is bringing in some unwelcome guest at home when you’re not around, then you can set up hidden cameras to get some proof.

The ideal setting, of course, is in the bedroom. Where else would they do it other than the bedroom itself? You can also put one in the living room so that you can see them entering the house.

Some cheaters do it hurriedly and never even bother to get to the bedroom. So if you have a camera glaring right in front of the couch, you might just be able to get a scoop of their infidelity.

You can also put it up inside your spouse’s car, but make sure it is small enough not be noticed by anyone. Put it on the dash board or rear window so you will have a wider peripheral view of who’s onboard.

Key Logger

Key loggers are software used mainly by hackers to monitor the activities of random computer users. Although this program is sneaky by nature, you can use it on determining whether your spouse has been unfaithful lately. It is easy to install, and all you need is some privacy so you can install it without your spouse knowing about it.

Key loggers can practically record any activity such as history of visited websites, emails, instant messages, and downloads. It can also help you obtain your spouse’s passwords on Myspace and Facebook.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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How to Use Keylogging to Catch a Cheating Spouse

kajay — Sat, 11 Dec 2010 18:16:33 +0000

If you suspect your spouse to be having an affair behind your back, then merely having a gut feeling may not suffice. You probably need evidence to find out about the affair and confirm if your spouse is in fact having an affair.

One of the amazing technologies created to keep track of people’s computers is the key logger. This program is similar with many Trojans and viruses that record the user’s play-by-play activities.

In fact, many hackers who created these viruses are using key loggers to obtain different information from people around the world.

You can use a key logger to determine whether your spouse is indeed fooling around. With the use of this program, you can find out if your spouse is sending racy emails or Instant Messages to someone else.

Every stroke, every letter that your spouse types appear on the key logger report, giving you enough evidence to pin him or her down.

1. Look for the best keylogging program around.

There are many key loggers being sold online. Among the popular ones are the Spectorsoft and the SniperSpy. Check the reviews of these programs and see what other people are saying about them in order to get your money’s worth.

The perfect key logger should be able to get screenshots of your spouse’s emails, IM’s, as well as websites he or she has visited. This is also ideal if you want to know whether your spouse is watching porn or not.

2. Use your credit card in purchasing the software.

The last thing you want is to get caught, so never use your spouse’s card in buying the actual program. Also, it would be better if you download the software directly into your computer instead of waiting for the installation CD by mail. If you order it by mail, it might wind up in your spouse’s lap, making him or her suspicious about you.

3. Install the software

Although the installation usually takes only a few minutes, still it pays to err on the side of caution. Something might go wrong and you do not want your spouse catching you with it.

4. Use the key logger to check social networking sites

These social networking websites have features such as private messaging, and your spouse might be using these features to communicate with the other person.

5. Uninstall the key logger after you have gathered enough evidence.

It is important that you do not leave any tracks behind. Cheaters have a sixth sense in them and they would know you are snooping around if you aren’t careful enough.

To make sure there are no viruses running around, run an antivirus upon removing the program, but do it while your spouse is away.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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How to Use Reverse Phone Detective to Catch Your Cheating Spouse

kajay — Sat, 11 Dec 2010 18:14:54 +0000

Do you have a hunch that your spouse is cheating on you? Have you ever seen an unfamiliar number in his or her cell phone but you are not sure how to find out who the owner of that number is?

CLICK HERE TO KNOW MORE ABOUT REVERSE CELL PHONE DETECTIVE

Are the evidences of an illicit affair mounting up but you can’t confront your spouse unless you have determined the name of the other party?

If you have caught your spouse talking to someone over the phone in a hushed voice, it could mean that he or she is really into something fishy. But you need proof. And you need to find out who your spouse is having an affair with. So this calls for a little investigating.

First, you sneak into your spouse’s cell phone and jot down the number that you aren’t familiar with. Then comes the difficult part of determining the identity of the owner of that number.

In this case, you will need some detective skills in order to zero in on the person behind that number. Here are some steps on how to use reverse phone detective in catching your cheating spouse:

1. Prepare yourself for any shocking news.

You might be caught off guard if you learn that your spouse is fooling around with someone you know, say, your neighbor, a fellow church member, or a co-worker. There is nothing more painful than knowing that your partner has been playing a dangerous game with someone you know.

Stay on your toes and do not let pain overwhelm you. You can only effectively confront your spouse if remain clear-headed through it all.

2. Make sure your spouse isn’t around when you conduct the search.

Do it when your partner is at work and you’re alone in the privacy of your room. When your spouse accidentally finds out that you have obtained the number, he or she will warn the other party and all your efforts will be washed down the drain. Be careful not to get caught, and more importantly, act as if you are clueless about what’s going on.

3. Use the internet to conduct the search.

Thank god we now have access to unlimited information through an amazing technology called the internet. Open your browser to start the search.

4. Use Google to search the owner of the number.

Google is the single, most powerful search engine in the world and nothing can match the volume of information contained in it. Chances are, the name of the owner can be obtained in just a few clicks.

Enter the number in the space provided and hit Search. Try different arrangements such as with or without parenthesis, with or without dashes in between the area code and the main number.

5. Visit Anywho.com and Mytelus.com.

If you aren’t having any luck with Google, use these websites in conducting your search. They are well-known reverse phone detective websites that hold large databases of people’s information. Type the area code and the main number in the appropriate boxes, and click Search.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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What Counts as Cheating in a Relationship

kajay — Sat, 11 Dec 2010 18:12:12 +0000

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

Infidelity is the cancer that destroys the foundation of a relationship. Many lovers commit this mistake, causing once-strong relationships to suffer and eventually fall apart.

But the term ‘cheating’ is relative on one’s point of view. What may be called as cheating by one couple, may be considered as some harmless form of human connection by another. And because people nowadays have been more politically correct than ever, it is important that you and your lover discuss what constitutes cheating in a relationship.

Here’s a lowdown on how to define cheating in a relationship:

1. Determine whether the relationship is official or not.

Some lovers do not want to put label on themselves. They avoid calling themselves girlfriend or boyfriend. Many couples nowadays engage on casual relationships, meaning they hook up and do things like what normal couples do, but they are not committed in the strictest sense of the word.

If you are in this kind of relationship, you need to clear it up with your lover whether you can date other people or not. Are you free to add another dimension to your relationship such as the freedom to see someone else? This conversation is very important in defining the boundaries of your relationship.

2. Emotional infidelity is as serious as physical infidelity.

If you are in a traditional relationship, then infidelity of any kind is a big no-no. This includes emotional infidelity. Some lovers do not really cheat by way of having sex with other people, but they rob their partners by being more emotionally open with other people.

This usually happens when things have gone sour in the relationship and communication is almost nonexistent. You spot someone at work who is willing to listen to you and before you know it, you start having regular lunch with this person and you find yourself drawn to him or her.

This results to loss of interest with your partner until you eventually decide to break the whole thing off. During the last few weeks leading up to the break up, you weren’t speaking with your partner anymore because your mind is too wrapped up with thoughts about the other person.

3. Casual sex may be more than just casual.

If you had a slip-up and was tempted to sleep with an officemate, that incident will continue to linger in your mind. This is especially true if you constantly bump into this person. Many people who commit this ‘casual’ mistake promise themselves they would never ever do it again, only to find themselves waking up in the same room the following morning.

4. Porn competes with your lover’s attention.

Although it’s normal behavior for guys to occasionally look at porn to entertain themselves, this can get in the way of having a healthy relationship. Most marriage counselors consider porn addiction to be a potent form of cheating.

If you have been watching porn for most of your free time, then maybe you aren’t giving your partner the attention he or she deserves. You are looking for sexual satisfaction elsewhere, depriving your partner his or her physical needs.

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Signs Of Infidelity In Men- 4 Signs To Watch Out For

kajay — Sat, 11 Dec 2010 18:09:23 +0000

Conflicts and arguments in marriage are inevitable. But some spouses go way overboard and cheat on their partners. Some are very subtle about it, and it is difficult to ascertain if he is in fact cheating because he can be real sly and careful not to get caught.

But there are telltale signs that will tell you if your spouse is sneaking behind your back. Most of these signs rarely come by, and so you must hone your sixth sense to recognize them.

One thing though: Never accuse your partner with anything unless you have built a strong case with enough evidence. Doing so might put your marriage in double jeopardy.

Catching a cheating spouse isn’t easy. But these signs will help you smell an affair from a mile away:

Sign #1: He is more attentive to you.

Don’t get me wrong, spouses are meant to be more caring and attentive to their partners. But if he isn’t always like this, and you notice some unnatural change in his behavior, it could mean he’s guilty of something and he’s trying to make up for it.

Sign #2: He tries to find fault in everything that you do.

This is a defense mechanism, a counter measure, if you will. Because of guilt eating up the core of him, he will attempt to put you in a bad light just so he can justify his actions. It is basic human nature to put blame on someone else, and your partner is not above this tendency.

He will start to nitpick your cooking skills, for example, and then he will move on to heavier stuff like criticizing the way you dress or deal with his friends. When he has enough leverage, he will drop the bomb, and it won’t be as serious because he had successfully put part of the blame on you.

Sign #3: He has lost interest in activities at home.

Did he used to mow the lawn and tend the garden in the front yard but now he seems to have not time for it anymore? Does he neglect house repairs that he used to enjoy doing during the weekends? What about the children, does he still help them with their homework?

If you notice a sudden loss of interest in these daily affairs at home, then you better brace yourself for some looming tragedy. You may be sharing his attention with someone else.

Sign #4: He has lost interest in having sex with you.

Although it’s common for couples to lose their raging hormones along the way, sometimes this could also mean that your partner may be getting it elsewhere. If you haven’t slept with him for about a month now, it’s time for a reality check. He may be having an affair under your nose.

These are only few of the many signs of marital infidelity. Before you confront your spouse about it, it is best to seek the help of a marriage counselor so you will be properly guided on how to best deal with the situation. Remember that no marriage is beyond repair as long as long as you are committed to fixing it.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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How to Catch a Cheating Spouse

kajay — Sat, 11 Dec 2010 18:07:20 +0000

If you have a hunch that your spouse is cheating behind your back, then it’s definitely worth spending your time trying to catch him.

He may or may not confess about it, and it’s up to you to find out the real score. This might just save your marriage in the nick of time.

Right now, you may be losing sleep thinking too much about it.

Well, it’s time to stop worrying and play detective. They say the truth will set you free and give you peace of mind, so buckle up and get the work done. Here are the steps on how to catch your cheating partner:

1. Keep a journal of your partner’s activities. This is where you will track down the time, dates, and places he has been to day in and day out. Also take note the names of the people who are with him at a certain date or event.

2. Crosscheck your notes with your spouse’s ATM transactions, credit card statements and bank records. If there is a discrepancy in his credit card statement and it is listed that he paid for two dinners at a restaurant, it certainly smells fishy. It could mean he paid for the other woman’s dinner.

Are there any hotel billings in his credit card statement? Look for the name of the hotel and call them up to confirm your suspicion.

3. Check his cell phone records to see his outgoing as well as incoming calls. List down any unfamiliar number and any repeat calls that he has made or received. If you are both on a family plan, you have access to these records. Just call the phone company and ask them to procure you with the call details.

Look for the owner of the unfamiliar number through reserve look-up services available online.

4. When you happen to stop by his office, be extra observant. Try to notice if he has been avoiding a certain co-worker. See if he is exchanging sly looks with anyone.

It is best to have a mole inside so find someone you trust in his office and befriend that person. They will be more sympathetic to you and report any peculiar relationships because you the wife. Attend office functions as often as possible and take advantage of this opportunity.

5. Make a surprise visit. Drop by his office or come home early than usual. You will more likely to catch him when he least expects it.

Makeup a fake vacation and tell him you will be going out of town to visit your parents. Then come at his office unannounced. Check people’s reactions and see if your spouse has been absent from work.

6. Take a day off from work and ask one of your friends to go on a mission with you. Together, trail your husband in car and see where he goes. You should know his schedule and itinerary in order to find him and effectively trail his back.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

Emotional Infidelity Definition

kajay — Sat, 11 Dec 2010 18:03:18 +0000

Emotional connection is the bond that makes a marriage work. Both husband and wife should keep this flame alive in order to survive all the challenges that life throws at you as a couple.

If this bond breaks, it is only a matter of time before one of you head out of the door and leaves.

There are different kinds of infidelity that can happen in a relationship, and not all of them are physical in nature. Emotional infidelity can be just as dangerous.

It happens when the emotional connection between you and your spouse is severed, and you start sharing your innermost thoughts and feelings with another person.

It is mostly a subconscious thing. You start having lunch with this guy at work and you enjoy his funny jokes. He’s real charming and most of all, he actually listens to you 100 percent of the time.

Occasionally, you would stop by his cubicle on your way to the restroom to have one of those endless innocent banters with him.

Most people claim it’s platonic, but what they don’t realize is that it takes away from their primary relationship with their spouse.

Although there is no sex involved, the mere fact that you are opening up your deepest thoughts and feelings to another person instead of your husband is what constitutes infidelity. Sooner or later, communication would become so stale that the marriage will begin to fall apart.

What are the signs that you are becoming an emotional cheater?

• You hold back your true feelings when you’re with your spouse. You want to keep them for yourself and avoid sharing them with him.

• You enjoy talking with your friend but you are bored to your skull when talking with your spouse.

• You spend the day all perky and lively with your friend but come home tired and sleepy, unable to commit to some quality time with your spouse.

• You always look forward to meeting your friend and having a conversation with him.

• You’re not interested in having sex with your spouse anymore. And when you let him through, your mind is occupied with thoughts of the other person instead of your husband who’s busy working himself on top of you right now.

• When at work, the thought of your spouse rarely crosses your mind because you’re dazzled with what’s in front of you.

When you have committed emotional infidelity, it is difficult to make things right once again. It’s a life’s work, something would require your utmost dedication to the marriage.

The first step in fixing things up is to acknowledge that you have blurred the lines between friendship and romantic involvement. Do not sugarcoat your actions. Admit your mistakes and try to keep your head straight.

Start seeing your spouse in a different light. He is a human being that needs to be respected. Focus your thoughts on his good qualities and spend quality time with him.

When you see your friend at work, acknowledge him but change the dynamic of your relationship with him from this point on.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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How to Deal With a Cheating Spouse

kajay — Sat, 11 Dec 2010 18:01:02 +0000

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

Upon learning that your spouse has been having an illicit affair with someone, you are forced to face two roads before you. One road leads to total freedom, a life where you live on your own terms free from your partner. The other road is one where trust is restored and the marriage is back to normal.

If you decide to leave your spouse for good, you must realize that that decision is final. There would be lots of counseling and law involved. And you will spend considerable time mending your broken heart before you can finally move on. There must be a moment of clarity before you decide to go down this road.

If, on the other hand, you have it in you to hold on to the relationship, then you must device a plan on how to deal with your cheating spouse. It is not easy to confront people objectively, but it must be done in order to resolve things and put closure to what happened. Here are some steps that would help you effectively deal with this situation:

1. Before setting up the meeting, make sure you have covered all possible areas of argument.

Do you have enough evidence to show to your partner? Can you hold yourself and not break down when your spouse starts getting overdramatic? Have you laid your plans on how to get the marriage back on track? By being conscientious about what you will say during the confrontation, you can say you have won half the battle.

2. Choose a place and time where there will be little interruption. Privacy is very important for conversations like this. Your home is an ideal battleground, just make sure the kids are away and are not running around while the two of you are talking.

3. Drop the bomb during the first three minutes into the confrontation. Don’t go cutesy and say that you know about the affair right away. Be as calm and composed as possible, but also make sure that your anger and disillusionment is coming through.

You must send the message that you are extremely disappointed and heartbroken but that you are willing to work it out.

4. If your partner starts blabbering about it, let him or her talk. Once your partner is done, tell him or her that there is no excuse for what he or she has done.

5. Be firm about your expectations. Don’t compromise nor settle for anything less. Tell your spouse that this list of expectations must be met if you are to start working on the relationship.

6. Ask if your spouse is still seeing the other person. If the affair is still ongoing, be very clear that you want it to end once and for all. Tell your spouse you cannot move forward unless the affair has been properly put to rest.

7. Learn to forgive. It is only through forgiveness that you can move things forward. A heart filled with resentment is not capable to love. Once you have secured your partner’s commitment and sincerity, be ready to forgive and forget.

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Reasons Why People Cheat in Relationships

kajay — Sat, 11 Dec 2010 17:58:06 +0000

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

If you look around and examine the relationships of people around you, chances are some of them are on a shaky ground. And for the most part, the main culprit behind it all is infidelity or cheating.

Cheating is an ugly fact of life. It happens everywhere – businesses, schools, relationships. Some people do it to get ahead in life; others are simply tempted in a moment of weakness.

Perhaps you have just found out that your partner has done this at least once, and you’ve been wracking your brains trying to figure out what went wrong and why. Here are some possible reasons:

An Unforeseen Incident

To many people, it was just a one-night stand, some completely unforeseen incident that simply happened without them ever planning for it. Your partner attends a high school reunion, bumps into a former classmate, and gets so drunk things started to get out of hand.

Incidents like this are totally off the cuff, but they can destroy everything you both have built and worked so hard for.

Endless Drama in the Relationship

If you have the kind of relationship that is dysfunctional and filled with drama, it is inevitable that one of you might go looking for love elsewhere. It is human nature to seek comfort and affection from other people if there is none to be had at home.

-Do you always nag your partner with pretty little things such as when he or she spilled the beer on the couch?
-Are you always trying to pick a fight whenever the two of you meet up for dinner?
-Are you the type who wears your heart on your sleeve and cries openly when your partner says something unintentionally offensive?

If you tick any of these boxes, things surely aren’t looking up in the relationship.

Love on the Rebound

Some people cheat as a means of trying to get out of the relationship. They can smell a divorce or breakup from a mile away and so they start looking for alternatives early on.

This is also a form of defense mechanism so that they would not be look down upon by their partners should a breakup eventually happen. They want to show their would-be ex that they can manage to quickly get into someone’s boat without spending time grieving over a breakup.

The Thrill of Not Getting Caught

Some lovers get bored with routine and try to look for ways to break out the monotony of being in one relationship. They indulge in illicit affairs or occasional sex with other people just for the heck of it.

They are not necessarily in love with the person they’re having an affair with, but the mere fact they’re doing something sneaky gives them adrenaline rush and excitement like nothing before.

There are countless other reasons why people get tangled up with cheating but all of it can be classified into opportunity, disillusionment or boredom. If you examine your relationship closely enough, you can get to the root cause of the problem and save your relationship in time.

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How to Confront a Cheating Spouse

kajay — Sat, 11 Dec 2010 17:55:53 +0000

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

The manner in which you confront your spouse can make or break the relationship. If you confront your partner at the heat of the moment, you might say something you will regret later on. In order to successfully deal with the situation at hand, you must thoroughly plan it out.

This game plan will take you places. It will guide you on the right things to say, when to say them, and most importantly, how to say them. If you are careful enough in crafting the game plan, you might just be able to salvage the relationship.

Gather Enough Evidence

You simply cannot go on the offensive unless you have built a solid case around it. Pure speculation would get you nowhere. It will give your spouse more ammunition against you. Plus, your partner will be more careful not to get caught, making it more difficult for you to pin him down.

Unless you have solid proof of infidelity, you must behave like it is business as usual. This way, your spouse won’t get suspicious that you are suspicious, and he or she would continue making the same mistakes over and over again. Soon, it is only a matter of time before you catch your spouse in the act.

Be Careful Not to Get Caught Snooping

If your spouse sees you rummaging through his or her cell phone and laptop, this can start off an argument and would make your partner extra cautious. Remember that your goal is to catch him or her right in the moment of weakness.

If you slip up and make the mistake of getting caught trying to catch him or her, it would blow the whole thing off and you would have no case to begin with. Don’t leave trails while on the hunt. Arrange his papers the way they were arranged before you went through them. Hire a taxi instead of using your car when you follow him.

Don’t Allow the Cheater to Play Mind Tricks on You

People have the tendency to turn the tables and blame you when you catch them right before your eyes. Even with solid evidence, you can still lose the game if you let your spouse twist the issue.

Don’t allow him or her to turn this into you. For example, when your spouse tells you that you are being childish, crazy and insecure, say, “Yes, I am all these things. Sure. So who is the guy and how long have you been cheating around?” This play of words is effective in getting the story out of her.

Always Be in Control

Don’t let the cheater get the best of you by being emotional or irrational about it. Compose yourself in a calm, polite way and show your objectivity through the whole confrontation. If your partner starts tearing up and become overly emotional about it, keep your cool and let him or her be.

Be able to read your spouse’s mind. Because of guilt, your partner might try to manipulate you through your emotions. Don’t let him off the hook easily. As soon as your spouse has spilled the beans, don’t make resolutions right away. Allow a few days to let the dust settle before you initiate another conversation.

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Signs Of Infidelity: Warning Signs Of A Cheating Partner

kajay — Sat, 11 Dec 2010 17:52:07 +0000

There will inevitably come a time in a couple’s relationship when the heat of the first few months subsides and the interest slightly wanes.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

This happens to a lot of romances, especially when either or both parties become too comfortable with each other and the connection turns rather dull.

Relationship experts says it is these dull moments that are critical and a lot of these in couples often leads eventually to a breakup. Some also say that certain individuals might see this as an open window to explore and, perhaps, meet new people. Failure to spot the warning signs of relationship boredom could encourage a brewing infidelity.

What are the common signs of infidelity?

Here are some telltale symptoms of a partner who is considering, or already is, cheating.

1. Your partner has turned critical.

Comments like “Get a job,” or “You need to visit a shrink,” are not only unmotivating but are also insulting. This could mean that your partner is unsatisfied with your current situation or, perhaps, thinks low of you.

If your husband or wife is suddenly picking on little things about you, which he or she hasn’t really done when you two where still at the ‘madly in love’ stage, you must take this as a warning that he or she could be considering seeing other people.

Simply following what he or she said will not always prevent infidelity. What you must do, instead, is encourage communication between you and let him or her air concerns, so you can both arrive at a solution. Let your partner know that he or she can talk to you even when the topic’s not so nice, so he’s be discouraged from seeking comfort from others.

2. Suddenly you are lavished with fancy gifts.

If your partner used to be content with ordering pizza and watching a movie during date night and then suddenly, without occasion, comes home with a highly lavish present, like a new necklace or a car, take it as a sign that something’s not right.

It is easy to be blinded by the excitement over the gift, especially when it hasn’t really been done before. What could be worse is if your partner gives you not just one, but several fancy presents consecutively. Most people use gold and glitter to mask their guilt.

When this happens, and you’re turning suspicious, don’t simply dismiss your feelings. Speak up; but nicely. The earlier your address a signs of infidelity, the easier it will be for you to deal with it.

3. Late work nights and weekends out have suddenly multiplied.

The alarming frequency of late work nights and conference weekends out of town could be a sign of infidelity. The problem could be deeper if you suddenly find your partner moving away from you to answer certain phone calls. This means there is something about his or her activities that he or she does not want you to know about.

To address this, first find out if there really is something to worry about. When your partner is busy with something, check the call logs and text messages — if these have happened very often and still not a word was shared with you, then it’s time to come out with your feelings and confront him or her calmly. When caught off guard, most people confess immediately; although it’s not always the case.

The bottomline to catching signs of infidelity is trusting your instincts. Succumbing to your worries and dealing with your doubts and being upfront about it is not a sign of paranoia. Remember, where there’s smoke, there must be fire, no matter how small.

If your partner becomes defensive and turns hostile after you’ve confronted him or her about your concern, then you must take it as a sign of infidelity. In this case, you must know that you are not alone and there’s help available.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Signs Of A Cheating Spouse: 5 Warning Signs Of Infidelity

kajay — Sat, 11 Dec 2010 17:45:36 +0000

Relationship experts says that when suddenly in a relationship you feel that something is amiss and your partner is hiding something from you, never ignore it.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

You may have been bothered by potential signs of a cheating spouse, but are afraid of confrontation or being called paranoid.

Disturbed instincts are the first indicators of potential cheating or lying and should not be simply dismissed as nothing. Pay attention to your instincts; but, remember, you must not mistake the signs to be hard proof.

Here are 5 warnings signs of infidelity.

1. Your spouse says: “I need some privacy.”

Husbands and wives normally do almost everything together, and nothing is being held secret. In fact, unlike boyfriend/girlfriend relationships, marriage is a lot more open and transparent because the couple is now living under one roof. So when a spouse is suddenly asking for space and some privacy, it is something to be wary about.

There are a lot of reasons why a person would want to have some privacy; but in a marriage, it’s often caused by either stress at the workplace or confused feelings. If it’s the latter, it could be a signal that your spouse is looking for alternative sources of interest — which does not include you.

2. Your spouse says: “We’re just friends.”

This statement is very predictable when a spouse is caught spending some time with somebody of the opposite sex. While this is valid, as all relationships really start out as friendships, alarm bells ought to start ringing when they’re beginning to hang out with each other a lot more often than usual.

This could mean that your spouse is enjoying the company of this person; otherwise, he or she wouldn’t be wasting time.

Take your feelings about it seriously and calmly confront your spouse about it. The sooner you are upfront about it, the more likely you can nip it in the bud before it escalates into something hurtful.

3. Your spouse says: “I have to take this call,” then moves away.

As a married couple, even issues with work are no longer secret and can be discussed openly. So when he or she suddenly decides to answer a phone call without you within earshot, this could be a sign of a cheating spouse.

Have you caught your spouse suddenly putting the phone down when you walk into the room, or diligently reviewing call logs to erase them? These are signs that must not be ignored.

4. Your spouse is behaving weirdly.

Receipts for dinners you didn’t share. Unaccounted money. Missing articles of clothing. Time spent away that cannot be explained. Inconsistencies with details. All these could be signs of a cheating spouse.

5. Your instincts are screaming “Yes, something is going on.”

When it’s your instincts doing the talking, never ignore them. Remember, you’ve been with this person for such a long time that the little changes in him or her are noticeable.

So when you feel something in your gut that you simply cannot explain, address it immediately.

Some marriages end up in shambles because not only has one spouse had the propensity to cheat, but the other had simply turned a blind eye and acted as if nothing was happening.

If you let your partner know that you’re sensitive and aware of the things around you, this lessens the temptation to cheat.

When you communicate your feelings with your partner and always remind him, through whatever little way, that you love him or her, it’s not likely than any form of cheating is going to happen.

Of course, it is needless to say that when one is married, he or she should still continue to nurture the relationship and not simply stop the intimacy and let go of ones self.

This is the mistake a lot of people make when they enter marriage, which is what often drives the other partner to infidelity. Marriage is a two-way street.

Don’t be naive. Spot the signs of a cheating spouse early, before it’s too late.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Is My Husband Cheating On Me?

kajay — Sat, 11 Dec 2010 17:42:22 +0000

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

There are multiple ways, and means, to cheat on one’s partner, ranging from the most subtle to the most obvious. Among men, however, there are particular signs that appear to be common to majority of husbands who are engaged in extramarital affairs.

While there is no single formula to determining whether your husband is cheating on you, there are general telltale signs that could fuel one’s suspicions.

Nowadays, women are more keen on how their partners behave to let them know if infidelity is happening in their relationships. The era of finding tangible evidence, like a lipstick mark, is a little old.

Now that doesn’t mean it’s not evidence, still. However, let’s look into the more subtle signs of a cheating husband. There are particular attitudes and changes in behavior that women can watch out for.

Watch How He Dresses

If, suddenly, your husband takes an interest in how he looks, smells, moves, talks, and everything else, this might be an indication that he is out to impress someone. Now if he’s out to impress you, then this wouldn’t be a problem.

However, if he spends most of his good looking hours outside of the house and without you around, that could be a sign of cheating husband. Your husband might be trying to get the attention of someone at work — or already has.

His Work Hours Change

It would sound fishy if your husband all of a sudden has to work long hours to midnight and talks to you less and less. Of course, the husband can always blame his boss for the overtime work and it could be true.

However, when he starts to not talk about his work life and dismisses any of your attempts to bring it up, something could be happening that you don’t know about. If he starts coming home at midnight smelling of cigarettes and not of an office, then it’s time you begin getting suspicious.

His Paycheck Changes

If before you got the bulk of his paycheck or he treats you out to dinner often, and then suddenly his paycheck goes down and the dinners happen next to never, then something is amiss. Cheating husbands normally pay for his dates with his mistress.

If this happens and your husband has not been demoted at work or laid off, you can start wondering whether the money that’s supposed to have been for you and your family are being spent on someone else.

He Likes Going Out More

If your husband spends more of his leisure time out of the house and not with your company, that could be a sign of a cheating husband. Someone who is keeping a mistress will find a good and many ways to spend time “with the guys” or weekends at a conference out of town.

If you want to check up on his whereabouts, call the friend’s house a few hours after he has supposedly gone. Don’t call your husband on his cellphone. Instead, call on the destination’s landline.

He Keeps His Phone Hidden

Guys normally just leave their things around and, usually, the wife picks up after them. If your husband suddenly becomes protective of his cellphone and talks on it when he thinks you’re out of earshot, that could be a sign of cheating. Check his phone bills to see if there is a number he consistently calls and how long each call takes.

The signs of a cheating husband depend on the personality and work life of the husband prior to the suspected affair. There are cases when the cheating is so well-hidden that the wife does not know of it until everybody else does, which can get really ugly.

Before this goes out of hand, it’s best to watch out for the telltale signs early on, so you can nip it in the bud or do something to revert his attention back to you.

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Is My Wife Cheating On Me?

kajay — Sat, 11 Dec 2010 17:39:52 +0000

The only sure way to confirm that your wife is cheating on you is when she admits that she is. Other than that, anything you hear or see would be based on plain speculation.

However, there are ways for you to stop the infidelity from progressing any further by knowing the telltale signs of a cheating wife early on.

The point of knowing the early signs of infidelity is for you to nip it at the bud and find ways to rekindle your romance and lead your wife back into your arms.

While infidelity can be characterized by a number of elements, there are general signs of cheating that seem to be common to most women.

By knowing how to spot the early signs, you will be able to save your marriage from possible pain, or, perhaps, even make it stronger by opening up lines of communication and rekindling the fire.

Of course, if the lost has gone and the infidelity is based on it, that’s another story.

Here are the common signs of a cheating wife.

You Notice Changes In Her Routine

Majority of women are sticklers for order and most of them follow a specific daily routine. If you notice your women suddenly deviating from her normal schedule and finding time to hang out with the girls, something could be up. A woman will definitely find ways to spend time with her lover no matter what.

Changes in a woman’s routine could be a sign of a cheating wife. Of course, this isn’t 100 per cent true, especially as a lot of women nowadays are becoming more empowered to get engaged in various pursuits. Confirm where she is going and if you find that can’t trace her whereabouts, then start wondering.

She Becomes Highly Argumentative

If your loving wife suddenly starts picking a fight on whatever and wherever, it could be a sign of infidelity. She could be really stressed about her new “schedule” that any little thing you notice and voice out can trigger a negative response.

Argument is a common defense mechanism of people who are hiding something. It could be the same with your wife. If she starts picking fights and then finds reasons to storm out of your house in anger, these could well be an alibi to spend time with someone else.

She Becomes Very Conscious Of Her Looks

It could be that your wife is trying to look good for your sake. But when she takes this new look out of the house and most of the time out of your sight, it could be meant for someone else.

Women can get very obsessive with their looks when they’re trying to impress a man. If you’re not the recipient of this obsession, you can start wondering whether your wife is seeing someone else.

She Spends A Lot Of Time On The Phone Or Online

The point is, your wife is talking to someone a lot and that someone is not you. In a marriage, husbands and wives commonly swap stories at the end of the day and share a laugh or two. If you find your wife sharing these stories with a friend more often and morphs into a somber mood when you’re around, that could be a sign of a cheating wife.

In the end, while there is no one way to tell if your wife is cheating on you, these signs will give you an idea that something is not going well with your relationship. It could just be a communication problem that you need to patch up and talk about, or new interests that are cropping up at mid-age.

If so, then that’s a good thing. Relationships need something new to keep things interesting, provided, of course, that these interests are known to both and not hidden.

These signs of a cheating wife are not 100 per cent correct, but if you sense something is weird, it’s best to immediately act on it towards improvement. Denying the potential of a problem could lead to its worsening.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Why Spouses Cheat

kajay — Sat, 11 Dec 2010 17:35:16 +0000

A lot of people take cheating as a very serious offense. Relationships can be destroyed and trust can be lost once you cheat on your spouse.

To protect your marriage, you should learn more about the reasons why partners sometimes look for other people for romance and intimacy.

You can get rid of the risks by finding out what your partner truly needs and why they sometimes feel the urge to move out of the relationship temporarily.

A Bad Background

Some individuals grew up in not-so-ideal environments where they weren’t taught cheating on your spouse is a grave offense.

There are thousands of men who take the situation very lightly because they have experienced it since they were little. People who grew up in broken homes are more likely to cheat on their spouse.

Children who hear their parents argue about someone cheating are more likely to also cheat in the future.

Children should be taught about the seriousness of cheating or else they will believe that the act is still forgivable and can be repeated again and again.

Needs Not Sufficed

This might be the most basic reason why spouses cheat. Husbands or wives usually get to a point where they feel that the other no longer suffices his or her emotional or sexual needs.

When a spouse does not get what he wants for a long time, the tendency to cheat becomes much greater.

It is important that partners always keep their emotions and relationship in check, making sure that they fulfill all the needs of their partners to keep the partner from looking for it elsewhere.

Needs have to be addressed properly through communication and general acts of kindness and understanding.

Boredom

When a relationship starts to get stagnant and boring, spouses might start to look for added excitement by searching for other partners.

Although the level of interest and personal connection with the third party is very low or only temporary, it is still a form of cheating.

This applies to both men and women who feel the need to spice up the relationship by trying and exploring new connections with a new person.

Some people simply enjoy the rush of meeting new people and creating new relationships. Most of the cheating in this part is based on physical and emotional needs.

No Communication

When couples lose communication, the spouse, especially women, will begin to look for more avenues to share her thoughts, feelings and emotions.

Women mainly cheat due to lack of communication or emotion. When couples no longer talk, they cannot suffice each other’s needs, thus leading the other to cheat and find love elsewhere.

Women usually build new relationships even without having to indulge in physical intimacy. Victims of abuse in relationships will also most likely cheat on their spouse.

It is vital that you talk to your partner and continue to update each other in your interests and needs to find more ways to boost excitement and keep the love alive.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Why Revenge is Not the Best Way to Deal with Your Cheating Partner

kajay — Sat, 11 Dec 2010 17:30:46 +0000

Revenge is never the most ideal way to get back at your cheating partner. In some countries, spouses are even pardoned for shooting a cheating partner if he sees them in bed together.

It is important that you keep your emotions and wits in check once you found out that you’ve been a victim of an untrustworthy relationship. There are better ways to move on, instead of just focusing on your anger and frustration.

Here are some great tips.

Revenge Does Not End the Cycle

Revenge will not stop a cheat partner from repeating the deed. If you want to save your marriage, a cheating partner will find your revenge as a justificatory act that it was only right that he cheated on you.

Provide the impression that you have been a good and faithful spouse and let him realize that it was his mistake that caused all the problems and confusion.

Taking revenge on your partner will only make things worse. He might even try to get back at you again by cheating more.

Revenge does not exact justice to both parties and the habit will not end once your cheating partner feels that you have already equaled what he has done.

Revenge Puts You Down

Most partners admit that they do not feel good after taking revenge on their partner. Others even feel the need to find more ways to hurt the cheating party.

Revenge does not make you feel good in any way, since cheating is usually not mended independently.

Even after taking revenge, a lot of spouses find themselves crying and feeling desperate day by day.

The hurt feelings are not erased by the act of vengeance and you might even feel more depressed by the fact that you reacted as immaturely by getting back.

It is the cheating partner that should suffer emotionally, not you.

Revenge Invites Other People In

Depending on the type of revenge that you did, other people might get involved, especially the cheating partner’s family and friends.

Regardless of the cheating, we can say that the cheating partner is never really wrong in the eyes of his loved ones.

Taking revenge will only ignite anger and resentment from other people. Instead, try to aim getting their sympathy for the wrong that your partner did.

Let them hurl him the details so he will be the one feeling bad and remorseful. You can also get more support and allies by not taking revenge, since everybody knows that you did nothing wrong.

Revenge Ends the Relationship

Most spouses, after taking revenge, feel that there’s no more chance to save the marriage. Both partners will start to resent each other since they both have hurt feelings and do not want to be in a position to apologize.

Revenge will mean that you wish to end the relationship and there’s no peaceful solution that can be accomplished through communication and understanding. If you still want to save your marriage, find more peaceful ways to settle the problem.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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What Is Emotional Infidelity?

kajay — Sat, 11 Dec 2010 14:55:12 +0000

Emotional infidelity is when a person becomes emotionally involved with someone of the opposite sex who is not his or her spouse or partner. Those who commit it, intentionally or unintentionally, usually argue that the relationship doesn’t mean anything because nothing happened.

However, it’s actually a very serious problem that can irrevocably destroy marriages. What makes it even more difficult is that it is not as easy to spot as when your spouse gets sexually involved with another person, because there is actually proof in that situation. Emotional infidelity is a completely different affair, but it is no less damaging.

The reason why it is considered cheating is because all of the emotional investment has shifted from the spouse to another person. More often than not, it involves dishonesty and deception on the part of the one committing emotional infidelity.

For example, if a husband just got off from a long phone call and his wife asks who it was, he would evasively answer that it was a guy from work. While it was indeed someone from the office, the conversation was far from business-like, as he talked about personal matters with a woman from work who he is becoming increasingly involved with.

A relationship isn’t just about sexual intimacy. What really makes a couple truly involved with each other is the emotional connection they have with each other. If that position is somehow usurped by another person, it’s already a red flag on the status of the relationship.

You might argue that it’s not really emotional infidelity; you just happen to be really close with your best friend of the opposite sex. However, friendship is different from an emotional affair. The latter requires more emotional involvement with another person, and does not respect the boundaries that the latter has.

Your so-called best friend ends up replacing the role that your spouse previously occupied. You might say you’re just going out for a drink with someone from the office just to unwind, but once you swap stories with that person that should rightly be shared with your spouse, then you are teetering on the edge of emotional infidelity.

To know if you or your spouse is toeing the line with emotional infidelity, look out for signs of guilt. Someone who is becoming emotionally unfaithful starts to be secretive about the things he or she does, such as keeping mum about his or her phone calls and suddenly setting up passwords on his or her computer.

A spouse who is doing nothing wrong will not feel the need to hide things from his or her spouse. Disengagement is also another sign of emotional infidelity. If you notice your spouse pulling away from you and somehow became a stranger without your knowing it, then that’s a red flag.

The two big signs are emotional disengagement and secretive behavior. If your significant other is pulling away from you, becoming distant or hostile, this is a big sign.

Likewise, if they are acting suspiciously, hiding phone calls and emails, avoiding questions and just generally acting like they have a secret, this is a sign. The reason for this distance is because he or she is no longer looking in your direction for the emotional support he or she is craving for.

You need to nip emotional infidelity in the bud before it progresses into something deeper, and more damaging to your relationship. While this may be difficult to do, you need to be alert so that you would be able to prevent further deterioration in your relationship with your spouse.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Is My Girlfriend Cheating on Me?

kajay — Sat, 11 Dec 2010 01:53:42 +0000

In this day and age, men and women are working more closely together than ever – they occupy the same space, they move in the same social circles, they have more or less the same stand where morals are concerned. Seduction is the new game – the more forbidden, the more exciting – and promiscuity is on the rise.

It is no wonder then that while 70% of men admitted to have indulged in illicit affairs, women are not so far behind with 65% admitting that they, too, have cheated on their partners at one point or another.

Now that’s an alarming statistics and it would certainly make you wonder how affair-proof your relationship is…especially if you’re starting to get this nagging feeling that something is not quite right in that area.

Contrary to popular belief, men are actually very perceptive. So if you feel a twinge in your gut, here’s a few nudges in the right direction to tell you if you have cause for alarm or not:

1. She bought a new set of sexy lingerie…And you’ve never seen it.

To a woman, the start of an affair is not unlike the first days of any relationship – the most exciting part of which is how her new beau makes her feel sexy and desired. To fuel that flame, she will want to look her best. If your girl is cheating on you, overindulgence on a makeover just might be a piece of the puzzle.

But the most glaring evidence will be in the lingerie department. Is she racking up the bill on some lacy Victoria’s Secret items? Start getting suspicious if you have seen the bill but not the sexy undergarments. Or at least, you have not seen it on her while you’re together.

2. She brings her cell phone everywhere with her. Everywhere.

Obviously, she’s expecting Boyfriend No. 2’s call. But there’s more to it than that. The first blush of romance is always the sweetest and it is this kind of attention that tempts the ladies to stray.

That is why, if they are receiving flattering text messages from the “other guy”, they’d want to savor it for all its worth – meaning, they won’t delete those incriminating messages until absolutely necessary. Yes, even if it means that they’d have to be extremely possessive about their cell phone that it’s quite obvious.

3. She’s always checking up on you.

She wants to know where you are and especially where you will be in so-and-so hours. Think that’s sweet? Think again. If your girlfriend is suddenly very interested in the minutest details of your daily itinerary, she might be scheduling her own around yours. She just couldn’t run the risk of bumping into you while she spends the afternoon with Guy No. 2.

4. But she doesn’t want you to check up on her.

She seems very interested in how you will be spending your day, it would seem logical to return the favor and show some interest in hers right? Wrong – if indeed she’s cheating on you.

You will notice this in how she responds to your question – she will either be defensive (stammering her excuses) or she’ll be on the offensive (accusing you of not trusting her and variations of the same line of arguments).

5. She used to be wild for you in bed. Used to be.

Has the passion cooled? Could be. But most likely, it is because she has spent that passion with somebody else. Is it guilt? Very probably. Women do have a flair for drama that it’s easy to believe that all of them are born actresses.

But when it comes to sex, all their acting skills evaporate. She might be torn between not wanting you and not wanting you to find out – especially if you are “a really nice guy who doesn’t deserve this from her”.

Sure, your girlfriend may still go to bed with you once she runs out of excuses but you might also notice a few odd things that would bother you about your lovemaking.

Was she a hesitant? Was she put off by your ardor? Are her eyes closed all throughout? Did she call you by a different pet name? Did she rebuff your attempt to cuddle during the aftermath?

The signs are there my friend. You can choose to be blind to them or you can choose to use that organ between your ears and take control of the situation before you are made an even bigger fool than you’ve already been.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Is She Cheating? Signs Of A Cheating Girlfriend

kajay — Fri, 10 Dec 2010 21:13:07 +0000

She’s got a lot of headaches lately and is breaking dates with you –or you spot her somewhere with another man when she’s supposed to be visiting her Mom. You just know something’s not right.

But does this means she’s cheating?

Whether you’ve been dating a week or a year, you can tell when something’s amiss.

As hard as it is on your manhood, and as hurtful as it is to your trust, you have to know the truth. As long as you put if off or try to deny or justify it, in an attempt to explain away what you see, just entangles you in denial.

As a man, you know your ‘gut instincts’ are usually right. You subconscious is picking up signs that – to your instincts – are unmistakable.

Sometimes all you need is some solid proof to dispel any nagging doubts that you’re just being paranoid or insecure.

Here are some signals to help you know if the girl you love is cheating on you.

• Openly flirting with others

• Abrupt halt to sex – or sudden increased demand

• Flimsy excuses to break dates

• Frequent headaches or other maladies that you can’t account for, that magically appear and disappear as needed

• Lying, secrecy and evasiveness

• Making you a special meal or making/buying you a special gift (from guilt and an attempt to look innocent)

• Hushed phone calls, hang-ups. Inexplicable defensiveness if you question who was on the phone

• Edgy – picks fights, finds excuses for blowing up

• Calls more than usual in a way that’s out of character, out of guilt

• New wardrobe, makeup, hairstyle, perfume, jewelry

• Buying sexy new outfits and using more make-up – but not for you

• New interests that pop up out of nowhere, like a new favorite movie, book, TV show, hobby, music style or gathering place

• Talks about a new friend at work – a lot, or goes on shopping trips looking for gifts for him.

It isn’t pretty

Sorry. I know it’s painful, but the evidence is clear. Now you just need to decide if there’s a problem in your relationship that can be fixed, or if it’s even working out.

Going back to ‘just friends’ isn’t going to be an option in most cases, so the split would have to be final, even though it’s likely you’ll run into each other again.

Try to be civil, for the sake of your own dignity. If you have a new date on your arm, so much the better!

Closing Thoughts

Unless you’re married or have kids, starting new should be do-able. Don’t waste a lifetime kicking yourself of crying over spilt milk.

Forgive (but don’t take back), don’t forget (learn from it) and keep moving forward.

Confide in a trusted buddy, take some time hanging out in your cave, and throw the football a few times. That single gal in the bleachers is giving you the eye.

A better relationship is just around the corner.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Emotional Infidelity In Marriage- Wake Up Before It Is Too Late

kajay — Fri, 10 Dec 2010 21:12:14 +0000

So you justify the affair, telling yourself that he wasn’t really cheating, since they never had sex.

If that’s true, why do you feel so bad?

Remember when you were in kindergarten and you swore to be ‘best friends’ with the girl or boy down the street? Remember how great that felt, trusting that you had someone in your corner, a real pal who valued your friendship above all others, exclusive, and would never do you wrong?

Then one afternoon, you found your best friend huddled over the Hot Wheels track with someone else, playing with the Mustangs and Chevys that only you two had shared before.

How did you feel?

Below is a checklist of some of the ways emotional affairs can be more dangerous – and insidious – than physical ones.

1. They erode marital intimacy

If you husband starts confiding in and seeking comfort from another woman, even if he never as much as pecks her on the cheek, he is stealing that intimacy and openness from our marriage. Gradually that phantom presence in your lives takes on a larger and larger stature, widening the gulf between you.

2. They erode trust

When marital secrets are shared with an outsider, whether for commiseration or sympathy, a very real betrayal of trust has occurred.

No one wants the personal details of a talk or fight with their spouse to be shared with an opposite-sex friend of your partner. When your husband or wife exposes such private emotional matters, it is a betrayal of the deepest kind.

When that betrayal is exacerbated by loving comfort and support of the affair partner, the very foundation of the marriage is compromised.

3. They create secrecy.

When one spouse starts hiding things from the other, two things happen. One, you’re moving away from you marital partner emotionally.

Two, you’re shutting them out of the most personal and private parts of yourself; the part that is supposed to be reserved for your spouse, even if the vows didn’t specify that ‘forsaking all others’ included emotional confidants.

4. They cause hurt.

Just like the best friend who betrayed you in kindergarten, an emotional affair hurts. It is a loss, an emptiness and abandonment. Because it’s insidious (hard to prove and harder to fight), you, the betrayed spouse can’t even effectively defend yourself.

5. They cause tension and bad feelings in the marriage

At some point, both of you will become angry and defensive. You’re both protecting your vitally important intimate connections, but unfortunately the emotional cheater is protecting theirs at the expense of their marriage.

Closing Thoughts

It is very hard, if not impossible, to defend your relationship against emotional affairs. They probably stem from some dissatisfaction in the relationship, but sometimes they just happen.

Internet affairs are particularly tricky because often the deep and passionate relationships that form are more of a fantasy than reality (since, unless we’ve met someone in person, our minds are actually filling in so many blanks that the real object of our attraction may be very different than what we assume).

Fantasies are tough acts to follow, and harder to battle! Even so, such a ghost-presence, like a live emotional affair between co-workers, works like termites eating the structure and support from under your relationship.

The only recourse might be to try and reconnect with your loved one, see a counselor and mutually decide to shelve the affair and revitalize your marriage.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Signs Of Cheating In A Relationship

kajay — Fri, 10 Dec 2010 21:11:51 +0000

Your intuition is screaming that something’s wrong, but you can’t find the evidence you need. If you watch his body language, read between her lines, you can see the tell-tale signs that your partner is cheating on you.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

You sense it, now you’re looking for evidence to convince you you’re right.

You’re in pain, bleeding emotionally, but feel like you need to get answers. Problem is, the answers he gives to your direct questions are indirect, confusing, diversionary or defensive. That, alone, is a red flag he’s having an affair.

Just remember – What he doesn’t say, as well as what his unconscious body language reveals, is the really damming evidence you’re after. So what are some of the warning signs he’s cheating?

1. Defensiveness when questioned

2. Lack of surprise at accusation, pupil dilation, because the question has already been anticipated and the lie rehearsed.

3. Avoiding physical contact or, conversely, exaggerated and phony gestures of affection – or even obvious over-attentive behavior and gift-giving

4. Either avoiding eye contact or unnatural, sustained eye contact that makes you uncomfortable

5. Fidgeting, touching of mouth, nose, eyes, ears or neck

6. Contracting so as to take up less space

7. Changing the subject, answering a question with a question, taking offense (as a smoke-screen), turning the tables and making accusations at you

8. Closed fists, hidden palms

9. Flushing, red hands, dry mouth

10. Increased pulse and respiration

11. Closing eyes and avoiding discussions

12. Clenched jaw, tense lips

13. Discord in facial expression – eyes don’t match mouth

14. Overall body tension or exaggerated (false) relaxation

15. Deliberate, careful speech, as if he’s weighing every word – which he is.

16. Rushed speech

17. Change in normal tone and pitch of speech

18. Overly detailed or elaborate tales

19. Sudden diversionary coughing fits, throat clearing and other stall tactics

20. Talking on the phone with back turned or walking away into another room

21. Muffled, low phone conversations that suddenly sound normal and innocent the minute you walk in. Either that or he suddenly hangs up or ends the conversation as if everything is business as usual.

22. Long trips to the bathroom to talk on the phone, or long walks outside to use the cell

23. Sex without emotional involvement

24. Signs of anger, guilt or nervousness

So there you have it. Those nauseated, panicky feelings in your chest and stomach were right all along. Every movement she makes, every cell in his body is advertising that he’s cheating on you. What do you do now?

It hurts. It hurts like Hell, but once you’ve accepted the truth you bring the power back to your side of the court.

Now you can decide what to do, whether it’s to forgive and seek therapy or ditch him and move on. The important thing is that you can now proceed with your eyes fully open.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Signs Of Cheating Wife

kajay — Fri, 10 Dec 2010 21:10:32 +0000

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

Your gut tells you something’s wrong. Your friends or coworkers act uncomfortable around you. You find sexy new dresses in her closet – but she’s not wearing them for you.

Are these signs that she’s cheating?

There’s no need to insult you by spelling out every possible signal that your wife may be having an affair. If you’re honest with yourself, you know it, it’s just too painful or humiliating to admit.

Yet, without first acknowledging the truth, there’s no way to fix things or move on in your life.

That elephant in the living room isn’t going away on its own. So what you really need is hard and sure evidence.

But what if the evidence is undeniable – she is having an affair? You’ll have some serious soul-searching and decisions to make. To help you know if it’s at that point yet, take a look at these warning signs.

• She stops wanting sex, or suddenly wants a lot of it, and it doesn’t make sense

• She pulls away physically and emotionally

• She talks a lot about a friend at work or a neighbor – or clams up altogether, giving you the cold shoulder

• She begins getting secretly giddy, and it spills over because she can’t – or doesn’t want to contain it.

• Sexy new dresses, lingerie or a new hairstyle appear, but she doesn’t wear them for you.

• Hushed phone calls, startled hang-ups, defensiveness or excuses if you question who was on the phone

• Stops calling you at work or calls more than usual, a symptom of guilt.

• Nags more, becomes touchy about things, becomes defensive or overly sweet

• Sudden prolific (guilty) gift giving

• New email or cell phone account just for her own use

• Renewed interest in her personal appearance, new perfumes or wearing makeup (or wearing it differently)

• New favorite TV shows

• Likes new music

• Develops a new hobby and might insist you share it

• Suddenly has a favorite new hang-out

• Likes a new kind of food

• Unexplained birth control devices you’re not using (i.e. condoms if you’ve had a vasectomy)

• More frequent, longer or oddly-timed shopping trips

• Withdrawal from your emotional life and less interest in you and your day

• Either of you getting an STD

• Sudden, open dissatisfaction with anything she can find to start a fight about

• Distant and preoccupied

• Uncharacteristic eagerness to leave on business trips

• Increased interest in romantic movies and books, movies on cheating (Bridges of Madison County), cheating songs

• Time spent carefully evaluating a gift item that seems out of the ordinary – and that never appears under your tree.

Yeah, I know, but you already knew, deep inside, and it HURTS. Just because it’s painful to face doesn’t change the facts. Fooling yourself by denying it only serves to prolong the pain, divert your attention. Why stall the inevitable?

Conclusion

Do you want a reconciliation or evidence for a fast divorce that doesn’t cost you an arm and a leg (since she’s already pulverized your heart and ego)?

Counseling can save you marriage, with hard work, if both partners truly want to try. Otherwise it might be best to cut your losses and move on with your life.

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Signs Of Cheating Husband

kajay — Fri, 10 Dec 2010 21:09:36 +0000

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

Your intuition nags at you, telling you something’s wrong. You find unexplained charges on your Visa bill of jewelry or gifts hidden away that vanish – but are never given to you.

Are these signs that he’s being unfaithful to you?

While you know it in your heart, your mind needs convincing to accept or confront it. To be honest, you’ve probably already gathered enough evidence on your own, using your own intuition or common sense, that, deep inside, you know the awful truth.

What you’re hoping now is that someone will help you dismiss what you know so you can stay, or prove you’re right, so you can file.
If you do prove he’s being a cad, you’ll have some decisions to make.

Divorce, counseling or reconciliation (forgive and take him back, no matter the emotional cost) are all painful, no-win situations. There is no happy ending here, except to learn that you’ve been misreading things and your marriage is intact and as secure as ever.

Even lack of action is making a choice. Ignoring the problem really is one option, or pulling out all the stops to try and win him back — if staying in your marriage is that important to you.

But you have come here because you need something, so here are some pretty substantial ‘red flags’ that the man you love is stepping out on you.

• Emotional intimacy vanishes, or is replaced by phony over-attentiveness

• Stops calling you at lunch or calls more than usual.

• Sudden, unexplained (guilty) gift giving

• Sudden sharing of interests and activities he didn’t use to do with you (guilt)

• Secrecy – and territoriality (of his briefcase, mail etc.)

• He no longer wants sex – or suddenly wants it more and wilder/differently

• Unexplained absences

• Lies

• Mysterious charges on your Master Card

• Overnight bag packed and stashed and ready under the bed, in the closet or in the trunk of his car

• Suspicious calls or behavior regarding calls, hushed low voice, defensiveness, hanging up when you walk in.

• Picking fights

• New email or cell accounts

• Renewed interest in his personal appearance, new cologne

• New favorite show, music, hobby, hang-out, food

• Unexplained birth control devices you’re not using (i.e. condoms if you’ve had a hysterectomy, for instance)

• More frequent, longer or oddly-timed shopping trips

• Withdrawal from your family life

• Getting an STD

• Sudden, open dissatisfaction with your looks/dress/cooking/housecleaning/sexual style, etc.

• Preoccupied/distant

• Change in alcohol consumption

• Lots of late hours at the office with no increase in take-home pay

• Eagerness to embark on business trips, especially when he used to hate to leave you

• Time spent carefully evaluating a gift item that seems out of the ordinary – or doesn’t make sense — and that never appears under your tree.

• Doesn’t show up for or bring presents on special occasions/holidays

Had enough?

It hurts. I’m sorry. But you already know, deep inside. We all try to fool ourselves when the evidence we see is just too painful to face, but that doesn’t change the facts.

If you think he’s cheating on you, more than likely he is, and fooling yourself by denying it or turning it into a game of skullduggery only serves to prolong the pain, divert your attention or stall the inevitable.

Conclusion

You’ll need to take the tough road and face this head on. That doesn’t mean an ugly confrontation; perhaps a professional can help get the two of talking constructively.

But don’t stick your head in the sand unless the sanctity of your marriage isn’t a priority in your life. Your love and trust is too important to throw away, and many marriages can be saved through counseling.

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Why Do Women Cheat?

kajay — Fri, 10 Dec 2010 21:08:39 +0000

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

The unthinkable has happened. Why would she even consider cheating on you?

Once you’ve finished nursing your bruised manhood, here are some reasons why women cheat on their men.

That said, something isn’t right in your relationship, at least to her mind.

1. She wants more spice in her life.

What isn’t well known is that woman can seek greener pastures and thrills, just like you can, but usually when circumstances have conspired to make her pull away emotionally first.

The biggest danger is that women are more likely to fall in love and decide to actually leave their marriage as the result of an affair.

2. She doesn’t feel cherished.

This is one big difference between you and her; she needs tangible reassurance and comfort, as well as an attentive partner. If she feels taken for granted when she’s spent almost every waking hour of her days working, cleaning the house, taking care of you and the kids and the dog, she wants – no, needs – to know you noticed and appreciated it.

If you don’t, she may very well seek the company of someone who does make her feel cherished.

3. She’s angry.

Not that she’s necessarily punishing you (although she might be), but if her anger, pent up frustration, or old bitterness and resentments have caused her to ‘turn off’ from you, chances are she’ll suddenly find the kind, understanding neighbor or coworker inexplicably attractive. There’s a recipe for infidelity if you ever saw one.

4. To feel youthful and desirable agaon.

It may be cliché but it’s a fact; we all want relief from the perils of growing old. The bloom of a new love interest or sexual partner can make her feel light-years younger.

Don’t become a stuck-in-the-mud couch potato. Try surprising her with nights out, classes you can take together, anything to make both of you feel the thrill of learning new things together.

5. To ‘get even’.

Revenge or punishment can feel very sweet if she’s angry or hurt over something you’ve done, or neglected to do.

6. To feel feminine and beautiful again.

Maybe she feels run-down emotionally, is having tough times at work, or found grey hairs or crow’s feet last time she looked in the mirror and needs a boost to her self-esteem that she’s not getting from you.

If she feels like she’s no longer attractive or feminine in your eyes, her self esteem – and her libido — plummets. She shuts down – until she finds someone else who can fire her up.

If you can make her feel that you truly see as beautiful again, and desirable, above all others, chances are she’ll be instigating her next romp in the hay – with you.

7. She’s lost her attraction to you

A lot of people talk about the need of the woman to keep up her appearance and stay in shape, but what about you? This does go both ways.

Little is more lethal to a woman’s libido than a huge pot belly that prevents real closeness, a scratchy unshaven face or slovenly appearance. Sure, she loves the real you, but she may not want to touch it!

The other thing that can turn a woman off is a betrayal of trust, abuse, your cheating on her, or loss of respect for you. It might be worth a bit of soul-searching to see if there’s anything that you could improve about yourself and your relationship.

8. She’s really on the prowl for a new husband

Ouch. Some women are truly only in it for status or financial security and will jump ship at the first sign of trouble. It may be boredom, it may be she met someone more alluring; it may be she’s so shut down and distant emotionally that she just wants her own space and a new start.

In that case, it’s time for some serious therapy if you want to save your marriage.

9. She feels emotionally abandoned or misunderstood

Of course, women need love and acceptance. We do, too (we just show it differently). If she feels you disapprove of her, don’t respect her, don’t cherish her, don’t support her in the things that matter to her, she will seek comfort elsewhere.

And nothing can make a girl feel better quicker than a new man whose body feels different and doesn’t come with all the baggage your marriage has accumulated. The fact that he craves her novelty makes it all the more enticing.

10. She feels badgered

Maybe you’ve been nit-picking or critical of her. All those little arguments and petty fights can drain all the life and eroticism from any relationship. Perhaps a marriage counselor can help get things back on track.

Closing Thoughts

It might not be your fault if she’s already found solace or thrills with another man, but there are some things you can try to prevent it or to regain the intimacy that was lost.

Also, even though it goes against the grain for most men, she’d probably be more than willing to seek the professional help that might just reunite you two in more than just a legal sense. Buck up and give it a try.

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Why Do Men Cheat?

kajay — Fri, 10 Dec 2010 21:08:01 +0000

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

You can’t believe it but the impossible may be happening. You man could be cheating on you. But why?

Your intuition, unfortunately, was right. There IS something going on there, and now you feel like your guts have been pulled out and you’re vacillating between rage, betrayal, hurt, dismay and even self-loathing.

It’s natural to wonder why you’re not good enough, why he felt a need to go to someone else with his love and his body, but it’s not accurate (it probably is not your fault) and kicking yourself won’t fix anything.

That said, something isn’t right in your relationship, at least to his mind.

Even so, you’ll be desperate to know WHY men cheat in the first place, and if you can pin-point anything that you may have done to enable his bad behavior. Plus, there may be something you CAN do to get his attention back where it belongs – on you.

Here is a checklist of common reasons why men cheat on their wives or girlfriends:

1. He’s horney. Plain and simple.

One thing all men secretly want is sex, as often and frankly as dirty as they can get it. If you can be that erotic adventurer with him, do it. This means not giving into the easy route of rest and sleep after a grueling day.

Remember when you were dating nothing was more important than the sex, and you were never too tired for it? That’s what he expected to have for the rest of his married life.

How can we fix things? Let’s face it, sometimes we ‘turn-off’ from our men when we feel angry, frustrated, over-stressed or unfulfilled.

While we might be too tired, busy, depressed or angry for sex, he isn’t. In fact, he needs sex to ‘maintain’.

Truth be told, so do we, but it’s way too easy for us to either tell ourselves we don’t, or, with all our other responsibilities, not realize how much time has passed since we were last intimate with our mates.

To us, a few hours is barely time to notice, but to him it feels like a draught.

2. He feels like he can’t really get as wild with you as he wants to.

He might love you very much, but, again, all almost men have that hunger for raunchy and wild. If he feels inhibited from acting out his deepest fantasies with you, he will likely find an outlet elsewhere.

3. He feels too secure in the relationship.

This might sound counter-intuitive, but we all tend to take things for granted if they’re too readily available. If he feels like you’ll always be there for him and you’ll never become attracted to another man because you just love him so darned much, he’s liable to get bored.

There have been some (albeit controversial) relationship experts that have advised keeping the flame hot by always leaving a little doubt in your partners mind.

You don’t have to ever actually cheat on your spouse to keep his interest, but a little flirting, depending on the ground-rules of your relationship, may add a touch of heat to your evening.

Try wearing especially flattering and tastefully alluring clothes when going out; he might just keep his attention on you and who’s looking at YOU rather than allowing his eyes to roam the room on a hunt of his own.

4. To feel young again.

That old cliché may be true. The thrill and endorphins of a new love or sexual liaison can make him – or even you — feel like the years have just melted away. Best is when you can both find ways to feel younger and more vigorous together.

5. You had a fight.

Yup, there are ‘get even’ affairs.

6. To feel ‘manly’ again.

Let’s face it, married or dating couples will often find themselves in a situation of eroding passion. Maybe he feels emasculated by nagging, tough times at work, or by having let you down one too many times, and needs a boost to his self-esteem that he doesn’t feel comfortable trying to get from you.

Sometimes all it takes is one instance of performance failure to set the rocky downhill slide into celibacy – until he finds someone else who can fire him up.

7. He needs variety/He’s just a playboy

Men crave excitement because they’re biologically programmed to mate with many females. It doesn’t justify his behavior though, because many men can and do resist this primitive urge in favor of the more rewarding and stable benefit of monogamy.

Again it helps if you keep yourself in shape (after all, you care how HE looks, don’t you?) and truly engage him in his intimate quest. Keep his eye on the prize – you.

8. He lost his attraction to you

Ouch. But let’s face it, we all want to be with someone who looks and feels good to us. If you’re completely honest, it doesn’t matter how great a guy is if you’re physically repulsed by him FOR WHATEVER REASON.

So, as hard as it might be to accept, cut him a little slack if you’ve let yourself get vey overweight, unkempt or slovenly. This is one thing you can do something about beforehand, so stay pretty, keep wearing things he finds sexy, and keep interested in sex.

9. He feels emotionally abandoned or misunderstood

Yes, guys need love and acceptance, just like we do. If he feels you disapprove of him, don’t respect him, don’t support him in the things that matter to him, he will seek comfort elsewhere.

And nothing can make a guy feel better quicker than a new girl with a new body who totally accepts him for who he is when he is with her.

10. He feels henpecked

Admit it. Maybe you’ve been nagging or bitter. Lots of little arguments and petty fights can drain all the life and eroticism from any relationship. Perhaps a marriage counselor can help get things back to where you both want them.

Conclusion

There might not be a thing you did that caused him to stray, if he already has, but there are some things you can try to prevent it or to regain the intimacy.

Also, if he’s willing, seeking professional help might just reunite you two in more than just a legal sense. At least now you can start on the path to recovery.

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Is My Boyfriend Cheating on Me?

kajay — Fri, 10 Dec 2010 21:07:16 +0000

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

The smell of unfamiliar perfume on your boyfriend’s shirt collar sent alarm bells ringing in your head. You took another sniff, a longer one, and this time you are certain – it has to be a lady’s perfume.

Is he cheating on you?

While TV soaps can make an entire convoluted plot out of that, don’t let you suspicions run amok and make a mess out of your good sense. Chances are, that wee bit of “evidence” may not mean anything.

But how do you find out? Do not –for one – confront your boyfriend. Because if he was innocent, your question might be highly offensive; and if he was not innocent, your questions would put his guard up.

Cheaters, even the most expert ones, tend to leave behind telltale signs of their indiscreet affairs, whether from carelessness or complacency.

One sign is not enough to tell you anything but it should also make you a little more wary for more tiny bits of clues. If, from your careful observation, you came up with a string of suspicious-looking clues, then your red flag should be up. Which clues should you be on the lookout for?

1.He’s spending more time at the office.

So OK, you’re boyfriend is on the way up the corporate ladder – that means he ought to be shouldering more responsibilities right? You’ll probably hear him constantly “griping” about the extra hours he had to spend at the office – late night meetings, catching up on the workload during weekends, etc.

But more than his words, pay attention to his actions. And his paycheck.

The overtime he claims to have been the reason he’s staying more and more and much later at the office should reflect in his salary. If it isn’t there, then the reason he’s not with you tonight is definitely not work-related.

2.He’s keeping the credit card bills to himself.

Infidelity can be costly to the cheating partner – hotel bills have to be paid, dinner had to be on him, and there’s maybe even that occasional visit to the florist. Of course, if your boyfriend is having an affair on the side, he wouldn’t want to have those lying around for you to discover.

3. His car mileage is way off the charts.

If your boyfriend is cheating on you, he probably would not want to carry on the affair right under your very nose. He and his No. 2 would probably drive out for the weekend and book a motel room at the next town where they have a much lesser chance of running into someone they know.

If you suspect him to be guilty of this exact same scenario, one of the most foolproof way of catching up to him is to make a daily record of his car mileage – does it report a good estimate of where your boyfriend said he would be, i.e., home-office-home? Or are there days – weekends especially – when the mileage scored excesses to the tune of some hundred miles?

4. He’s suddenly fastidious about hygiene.

It’s not just that your boyfriend is trying to impress someone that’s why he’s suddenly more conscious about neatness and overall hygiene. He’s also probably covering something up.

The most telltale signs of an afternoon tryst with a third party would, after all, be on his own body – the smell of another’s perfume, the smell of sex, and lipstick marks to name a few.

And the best way to get rid of that is to take a shower and scrub it all off. Is he also suddenly so secretive about his laundry? If that’s the case, you are on to something here.

5. His sexual habits and patterns are suddenly unpredictable.

One of the things that excite straying boyfriends about their illicit affair is the sex. It’s also one area where you might find the most obvious of clues.

As I see it, there are two possible ways that a typical male will react to his official partner if he’s also getting sex from somewhere else:

1) your sex life suddenly becomes stale, or even non-existent; or

2) your sex life gets infused with renewed passion, and you may even be taught a new thing or two. The former seems pretty much expected; but the latter?

Call it a quirk of your boyfriend’s nature but he may have learned that new trick from somewhere and would want to test drive – so to speak – this new discovery with you.

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Is My Partner Cheating Or Am I Just Paranoid?

kajay — Fri, 10 Dec 2010 21:06:38 +0000

Some people may, truly, be paranoid, but most likely, if something is nagging at you, it’s worth taking a closer look. Our intuition is powerful. If you’re feeling betrayed, hurt, insecure, lied to or abandoned, there may be a good reason.

Be what, exactly, counts as cheating? There is the obvious act that no amount of explaining can fix, but what about more subtle situations that may be less clear?

Simply suspecting that your spouse is giving his body or her heart to another is hurtful enough, but feeling guilty for being suspicious is a 2-edged sword. Have you two set any ground rules as to what, for you, constitutes infidelity? Is your loss of trust justified?

Here are some tips to help you sort things out.

1. He suddenly begins talking about a female co-worker. A lot.

For some reason, talking about a new love interest seems to be an irresistible impulse to some – even if it’s to their spouse (albeit couched in cloaked language).

While actually consummating an affair at the workplace can be daunting, very strong emotional ties can form there. Whether presenting a united front against a supervisor, or experiencing the rush of an especially successful project partnership, there’s a whole slice of his life you don’t get to share; and the confidences and intimacy that result can erode the foundation of your relationship.

Even if it never gets physical, that conflict and withdrawal of attention from you and your marriage is as damaging as a sexual affair.

2. She delights in putting a lot of time and effort into making a special gift for her special ‘friend’

She might focus joyfully on burning a CD of her favorite tunes for him, become consumed in painting a canvas with particular care, or take pains to buy just the right present.

Her focus and thrill may be more than just a sense of obligation. Your emotional radar is pretty good; if you find yourself feeling slighted or jealous, there’s probably more going on there that you need to find out about.

3. You go to a party with your spouse, only to have him ‘disappear’ at some point.

When you do manage to track him down, he is way too close to another woman.

OK, maybe you two had a fight on the drive over, or a few drinks, but that’s no reason to pardon his bad behavior. It may have just been innocent, but your gut is sending out all sorts of red flags. If he’s finding emotional comfort or a sexual thrill from being close to someone other than you, it’s time to have a talk.

4. “It’s just about the sex.”

This may be something he tells you, or even tells himself, and some couples don’t count actual intercourse as cheating (seeing emotional intimacy as more damaging.)

But don’t fool yourselves; physical and sexual intimacy does forge strong emotional ties. In this case, the cheater is likely hurting both you and the object of his desire, as no one is getting the result they really want – except him.

5. She feels a need to comfort an old friend – alone.

If she lets you come with her, fine. But if she has to go there alone, be careful. Long, late night phone conversations after you’ve gone to bed, frequent chats or long emails are red flags.

Remember that loss, pain, fear and shock can be powerful aphrodisiacs, and very strong bonds can be forged over hardships.

It may be innocent, but . . .

As hard as it may be, try to own your feelings and look beyond your reflexive sense of guilt for doubting your loved one. We’re smarter than we think we are, and we try repeatedly to talk ourselves out of what we already know.

Watch for these warning signs:

• Sense of betrayal
• Insecurity
• Loss of intimacy
• Secrecy
• Sense of abandonment

It comes down to two things then; the ground rules you two have set for your relationship when it comes to what it means to cheat, and your feelings in the relationship.

Anything that causes a loss of intimacy between you, makes you lose trust, or feel insecure or jealous, needs to be examined.

Don’t simply pass it off as overreacting or just being paranoid. Doing so just enables the cheater to continue, or even escalate, the behavior.

If possible try to seek professional counseling before things get too far.

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

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Is He Cheating On Me? Signs Of A Cheating Boyfriend

kajay — Fri, 10 Dec 2010 20:58:43 +0000

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER

His last flimsy excuse to break your date was just too much. He’s sick an awful lot lately, breaking dates with you – or you spot him somewhere when he’s supposed to be somewhere else. And with another girl.

Are these signs pointing to infidelity?

You just don’t want to see it, but the evidence is there in your gut. To be honest, you’ve probably already gathered enough evidence on your own, using your own intuition or common sense, that, deep inside, you know.

What you’re looking for now is for someone to help you dismiss what you know, so life can go on as usual – or to prove it and move on to a better relationship. It just hurts too much to think he could really, actually be cheating on you.

Just remember — If you do prove he’s stepping out on you, you’ll have do something. Not a big drama, screaming, accusations and throwing things (unless you really want to burn that bridge forever!) but by talking with him, finding out if it’s worth working things out or better to simply move on.

Which is not to say moving on would be easy. Not if you have grown to really care about him. Besides, knowing he’s giving his love and his body to another girl is a tremendous blow to your self-esteem and feelings of self-worth. Going back to being ‘just friends’ in unlikely, so a break will have to be a clean one.

Here are some pointers to help you determine if the man you love is cheating on you.

1. Emotional withdrawal

2. Sudden, prolific (guilty) gift giving

3. Sudden sharing of interests and activities he didn’t use to do with you (guilt)

4. Doesn’t like you seeing what’s in his briefcase or wallet anymore/secrecy in general

5. Abrupt halt to sex – or sudden increased demand

6. Unexplained date-breaking, frequent illnesses you can’t account for that magically appear and disappear as needed

7. Lies

8. Forgetting your birthday, Valentine’s Day or Christmas present

9. Hushed phone calls, hang-ups, defensiveness if you question who was on the phone

10. Seems to find fault with you over nothing

11. Phone calls to you increase, stop or he doesn’t answer or return calls like he used to

12. Unexplained changes in his personal appearance

13. New interests that he either pushes on you or excludes you from

14. Unexplained birth control devices you’re not using (i.e. condoms if you’ve been on the pill, for instance)

15. Withdrawal from your emotional life, not asking how you are or how things are at the office

16. Getting an STD

17. Finding sudden fault with you/ things about you

18. Preoccupied/distant/dreamy/aloof

Have you heard enough?

It hurts. I’m sorry. But you already know, deep inside. We all try to fool ourselves when the evidence we see is just too painful to face, but that doesn’t change the facts.

If it looks like a gorilla, smells like a gorilla and sounds like a gorilla, guess what? Unless you’re living together, the best route, after talking things over, may be to just move on. Don’t give this, or him, more power than it deserves.

Closing Thoughts

What you need to do is face it. Address it, not with wild angry accusations or guilt, but with as level a head as you can.

Seek therapy, counseling; decide what your personal boundaries and tolerances are, and when the pain outweighs the benefit of hanging on.

If you’re young, you have a lifetime ahead to find the right match. Even if you’re older, it’s still probably better to let go and allow emotional and psychic space for someone new to enter your life – even if it feels like time is running out and you have no other options.

Chances are, a life free from the pain of betrayal is worth more than the charade of the relationship fantasy that he’s effectively killed.

In any event, seek out a close friend or therapist. You’ll need to talk, to cry, to throw things, withdraw to lick your wounds. Then you’ll need your friendss to help you move on.

Don’t hang on to the pain forever. Don’t give him that much power.

Of course, many relationships do recover from infidelity; perhaps scathed and battered, but alive. Sometimes we take what we can get.

Other times we do best to stop the cycle, throw it all overboard and start over, alone, or with someone new.

Besides, maybe there’s someone much better for you, who you can love even more completely, waiting just around the corner.

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Disclaimer

kajay — Sat, 04 Dec 2010 01:48:33 +0000

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About me

kajay — Sun, 18 Apr 2010 17:30:02 +0000

My name is Kajay Williams and I have been personally affected by infidelity.

I know how much infidelity hurts- it is probably the most painful feeling one can ever experience in life and I sincerely hope and pray that no one ever has to go through the trauma.

Unfortunately research indicates otherwise.

In a recent poll, 99% of married men and women expected their partners to be 100% faithful to them; however, half of all men and a third of women have cheated on their spouses.

The aim of this website is to help you give all the necessary information and tools to help you determine if your partner is cheating on you and catch them cheating with evidence.

Remember that suffering from infidelity in silence comes with a heavy mental, physical and emotional cost. I have personally experienced it and it took me years to come out of it but not before my self-esteem and confidence hit the nadir.

However I have been able to emerge a stronger, tougher and better person and I wish you the same as well.

Rooting For Your Happiness and Well-Being

Kajay Williams

Author, Bust A Cheating Partner

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